Arigato for the ideas and reviews! I'd thank you all personally, with names an' stuff like some of the other authors, but I forgot your names. O Sorry! I will use the idea involving Jack the Monkey, and I suppose I'd better get Mr. Sparrow out of the brig, since a reviewer expressed concern. On with the show!

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Life on the Scourge had, of late, become very, very loud. Since rescuing Tess' cousin Sam, Tess and Sephiroth had gotten into numerous arguments about the young pirate, Sam had discreetly spiked everyone except Tess and Sephiroth's drinks, causing numerous fights, which often caused half the noise, and Cloud and Yuffie were apt to start yelling at each other for no reason.

And of course, the Shinra slaves had an annoying tendency to sing while they rowed. It drove everyone mad, but nothing Cloud did kept them from singing as loud as they could. Tess suggested they did it on purpose. Sam, Sephiroth, Cloud, Yuffie, and Vincent chased her up the mast.

Add to that unconscionable amounts of free time and boredom, and you have a recipe for disaster.

Somehow, they had entered the warmest region of the planet's seas, and daily life on deck was sheer torture. Once, Tess tried to keep them all cool with cold breezes, but the effort was too great, and she passed out. Numerous migratory seabirds constantly plagued Nanaki, pecking his nose so badly it had to be bandaged, and the constant heat had fried Cait Sith's circuits.

And once again, they found themselves harassed by Barbossa.

Barbossa and his crew, still after the last piece, had come upon them in the dead of night, capturing them. Tess, Sephiroth, Sam, and the others spent half their time glaring at Nanaki.

"We've got to get out," Cloud said, after being poked by Vincent's claw for the fifteenth time.

"How?" Yuffie protested. "No room for you or Sephiroth to swing those great huge swords of yours. I don't think Tess can blow us out without blowing up the brig, and any materia would destroy the ship."

"And I wouldn't like that very much. Who would like it if someone blew up your ship, savvy?"

The others jumped, and looked over at Jack Sparrow. He was watching them idly.

"Wotcher, Sparrow!" Sam called.

"How long you been down here?" Vincent asked.

"Forgot. I lost track of the weeks yesterday."

The crew of the Scourge let out a collective moan.

"Hey, wait a minute," Cait Sith said. "If this is your ship, why is Barbossa captain?"

"I'd rather not go into that, you savvy?" Jack caught sight of Sephiroth, who hadn't spoken yet. "You're a fine piece of ass, miss. Care to join me if we ever get out?"

"I'm a guy. Screw your own ass halfway to Midgar and leave you there to rot," Sephiroth growled.

"Easy, Captain."

So the crew and Jack waited, for something to go their way. Their chance came, when, a few days later, Jack the monkey happened to come by, holding the keys to their cells.

"Monkey!" Jack said. Cloud looked up.

"Not you, moron! The real monkey!" Sephiroth grumbled. Cloud looked down again.

"Here, monkey!" Sam called. The monkey chattered, and ran over through the bars of the cell and over to Sam, who petted it on the head.

"How'd you do that?" Nanaki asked.

"I befriended the monkey the last time I was here," Sam said, still petting the monkey.

Tess took the keys, and unlocked their cell. The crew silently filed towards the stairs, when Jack called, "Hey! You forgot me again!" Tess made her way back, and freed him.

Once up on deck, Tess kept the Pearl's crew down by air pressure and constant tonfa blaster shots.

"Does that thing ever run out of ammo?" the fat pirate asked his friend. They were both promptly shot in the forehead.

"What are you going to do with Jack?" Barbossa asked.

"What?"

"Not you, the monkey! What are you gonna do to him?"

Sam looked at him. "Change his name and make him our mascot!"

"Nooo!"

Sephiroth and the others made it over to the Scourge, which Barbossa was going to use as a new ship, and untied it. They got it ready for sail, and Tess flew over to it as it sailed by. Vincent filled the Pearl full of holes as they passed, and that was the last they saw of Barbossa and his crew. For a month or so, at least.

Once back on track, Sephiroth and the others voted to see if Jack would stay. Five out of the nine crewmembers voted to have him stay, so stay he did. And add to the noise as well. Then they had to decide where to go next.

"How about Icicle Inn?" Cloud suggested. This suggestion was met with hearty support, as they were all sick of the heat. So they headed up to Icicle Inn.

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Ooo, cliffy! I'm so evil! What will happen to Sephiroth and his crew? I don't know. Suggestions? If I get a bunch, I'll keep 'em up there, and use the ideas till I run out. But don't give me ten or fifteen! I'd get overwhelmed, curl up in the corner, and make my friends go, "What did you do, Kai? She went into fetal position!" o And that two-week thing I mentioned in the last chapter? That's just in case my crack team of crackhead muses craps out on me and takes a wander through the woods. And if anyone flames me in a signed review, I will hunt you down and flame you back! Muahahaha! Flamers beware! BEWARE! poofs away, then returns If it's been two weeks plus since my last update, sorry! Lost track of the time. BEWARE! poofs away again.

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Aaagh! Ohmegod, I took so long! I'm so sorry! I totally forgot to update cuz I kept putting it off, then when I finally remembered to I got a new computer, and I was gonna use it, but it doesn't have Word or any thingy that recognizes, and the computer I typed this on doesn't write CDs, and the new one doesn't have a disc drive, and the one I typed this on is a total waste of space, and… Ack! Sorry! Feel free to flame me for that dreadfully long wait, I suppose I deserve it… . I just hope that this chappie was worth the wait. Nyao… (hides in a corner)