Must… make… more fluff… typing…
Chapter 12: The Unspoken
A group of butterflies sat haphazardly perched upon a stretch of marigolds, fluttering their wings, talking about whatever butterflies talked about. Their only language hidden beneath the power of their flight. Some groups of two butterflies danced together above the rest, giving off a spectacular show of the season of romance which was coming to an end all too soon. For them, everything could be told by how they were flying, whether they were flying straight into the free sun, or twirling around their mates, or whatever other flight pattern.
In this paradise of nature, the calmness was broken as a small kitsune leapt into the rush. The disturbance caused the community to scatter, but the young one was fast to catch a few in his net. Eyeing his capture, Shippou smiled. Inuyasha had said he would be horrible at hunting, and yet he had stalked his prey perfectly and had come back with 5 victims in one swoop.
He didn't have time to relish in his victory, for the ground was shaken by a dark voice belonging to the most unlikely person to possess such a quality. "OSUWARI!"
The sound of an equally loud crash and yelp continued as it always did, and the fox demon turned to his companion, Kirara. "Would it be hasty of me to say that he's back?"
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He peered at her taking yet another deep breath and tried to get up to stop the onslaught, but it was too late. "Osuwari! Osuwari! Osuwari! Osuwari! Osuwa…"
"Sto-o-op!" the hanyou whined loudly.
Kagome panted loud and hard with her fists clenched tightly against her sides. As the spell wore off and he started to rise, she gave the word once more so that he would land with more force this time. He grunted from his crater in the dirt and Kagome started her ranting, "Inuyasha no baka!"
"What the fuck did I do?" he complained, his voice muffled slightly by the obstruction of dirt and stone beneath his nose.
"Osuwari!" She yelled one last time, and he yelped.
Naturally, she would settle down over time, but she had a sneaking suspicion that it would take longer this time. Not only had the hanyou left without notice, thereby leaving the whole group in danger if they were to be attacked, but he had been gone for two nights and nearly two days, longer than he had ever left them by themselves. Well he would have to put up with being "left in the dust" himself for that one. "How could you leave us without even saying anything? I've been worried sick, baka!"
Her words caused his ears to perk up a little and he glanced up at her. There was a fire in her eyes that he had grown to fear. A kind of stubbornness and independence that bothered him on a daily basis. Yet within the harshness of her words and her tone there lay a sound of real hurt, and worry. Even in her angry state, the words never sounded quite so beautiful. But of course, he would never say that. "Keh! Nothing to worry about! I'm not the pathetic human wench here!"
She turned away from him and started walking back to the camp. She didn't truly come to him to talk about how stupid he was. When she had found that Inuyasha had disappeared, she waited on the highest hill she could find to keep watch for him. During the night, she had not been able to fall asleep for fear that he had been in real trouble. On the following morning, when she saw his figure coming over the hill in the distance, she ran to him as fast as she could, only to scream her sit command repeatedly for leaving her behind. Normally she would be sorry for being so hard on him, but this time, she would make an exception.
Inuyasha braced himself to eat dirt again and squeezed his eyes tight, but after a while he realized that it hadn't happened yet. "Huh?"
He got up and cocked his eyebrow when he saw that Kagome, as angry as she was, wasn't sitting him anymore, as was the fire he had come to expect from her. Even during lesser arguments, she would sit him at least 20 times. Frantically getting to his feet, he ran to catch up with her. When he got up by her side again, she sped up a bit to avoid him. Each one creating a jab from within the center of his heart.
The look on her face could have killed with that scowl and those eyes of pure disappointment. When she went ahead of him, he couldn't help but pause in his steps for a moment. The feeling of stiffness at the absence of her gaze was what stopped him. But he eventually shook it off and went to catch up with her again. Again she avoided him and now had her arms crossed to show her displeasure, and that he was the last person she wanted to talk to right now. His ears drooped way down low and he just barely suppressed the dog's whine that burned his throat.
On sight of the camp, she waved the hanyou off in a you-deal-with-him manner to the others. The team didn't dare say anything to her with that look about her. For a miko, she was sure good at looking evil. Kagome threw the bead curtain aside and entered, and was followed closely by a very downtrodden Inuyasha. Moments later, he backed out of the entrance when he received a growl from her. Sango and Miroku eyed his reaction curiously. Never had he been on the receiving end of a growl.
Just outside the door, he crouched down low like a dog with his tail between his legs and glared in frustration at the ground, and perhaps even sadness, as the team would attest to. Really he was more like a pathetic dog every time those two fought. They heard the grinding of dirt as it was clenched between his clawed hands. His face seemed preoccupied with some thought they knew they were forbidden to see. But in its secrecy, it was all the more enticing, and a few steps brought them closer to him to discover his troubles.
When he noticed their close presence and their pitiful looks, he glared at them and sprinted to the other side of the hill where it was quiet. Placing the Tetsusaiga across his chest, he set his sight on the horizon and tried to rid his thoughts of the new silent treatment he was receiving.
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Every night the crickets came to indulge in the coolness of the early summer. It was a ritual Kagome had grown accustomed to over the years, along with the feeling of grass between her toes and crisp wind on her face. It was her only comfort for the moment. Inuyasha announced to everyone, or at least Sango and Miroku, that he was going out quickly to hunt. Yet she knew by how far away they were and how close he was to her that he was really talking to her, and in his voice she could hear the shame and the beg for her to just look at him again. But she would not apologize for being angry, nor show mercy. It wasn't even about being vulnerable without him around. So many ideas flashed through her mind over how he had been captured, tortured, and killed. Each one she had a distinct feeling she had a hand in creating, for some reason unknown even to herself. It didn't matter that he ultimately did come back unharmed, it wouldn't heal her own scars.
Inuyasha returned with a few rabbits slung over his shoulder for dinner. It had taken longer than expected, since he had painful thoughts to preoccupy him, to dull his every sense. He got up the courage to look at Kagome, whose back was turned towards him just slightly down the hill. As he cooked the meal over the open flame, he couldn't help but let his amber eyes steal glances of her. She was still mad at him, he knew it. She hadn't talked to him all day. A deep sigh escaped him and his eyes glazed over for a few minutes. He was brought of his trance when he smelled the meat starting to burn. He gasped and struggled to save his meal just in time. When he had finally put them on plates, he took them inside and set them down for the others. His own mouth watered as he eyed the meat, but there were more important things to deal with now.
Making sure the others weren't looking, the mild night became colder as the hanyou stepped outside. The comfort of the grass soon greeted him too and made him stand up a little straighter as the blades tickled his skin. When his breathing became uneven he knew he was in for it, and he was right to think so. Once he caught sight of his loved one sitting down over the hill, his ears could pick up the upbeat in his heart and the slowing of his steps. Ultimately he came to a stop and just looked at her. Just looked, taking in the glory that was Kagome. The woman who bore the weight of his troubles and his trust. Even the hanyou knew he never looked at anyone as he looked at Kagome. People often said that he had gained a softness in his face when she was around, or even mentioned. It wasn't that far from the truth. In fact, it was right on the mark.
The wind in her hair called him out of hiding. Her soul reached out for his even in her state of anger and his state of stupidity. Like an imprisoning chain it bound him to her eyes and her touch, yet in those chains he felt freer than ever before. Free to feel what he wanted to feel without fear of repercussion. The cause without the effect. Always in her grasp yet he was able to take flight no matter what the situation. The sight and sounds and touches of his Kagome influenced his language in his every move. The language of his step that spoke either of determination, of pride, of worry, or of a boundless dedication.
When she heard him approaching, she turned her head slightly so that he could see her saddened profile. If that wasn't a punch to the stomach, what was? He saw the same coldness he saw in hateful eyes of humans in other villages. If she hated him too… He swallowed the lump in his throat. "K-Kagome," he stuttered out, "There's food ins-s-side. I-if… if y-you wanted it."
Her only reply was a turn of the head away from his stare, and his shoulders slumped forward. Still determined to win her over, he crouched down merely a foot behind her and faced her raven hair. It was more for the smell of her hair then anything that he chose to be so close to her in this moment. Nothing gave him more courage than the flowery ripples of joy cascading over her body. Without fail, it soon gave him the strength to look at her angelic form with confidence. "You still mad, huh?"
He received what would barely be called an answer. Just a snooty grunt followed by a flip of the hair. Inuyasha closed his eyes and inwardly groaned against the heat provided with his own embarrassment. "What do I need to do then?"
No answer, and Inuyasha was getting impatient. "Come on, Kagome. You want me to say it? Okay, I'm sorry. You're right. I should have told you. Now can't you just talk to me again? I'm really sorry."
He didn't see the weakness growing in her eyes. Only she knew that an apology from him was enough to make her melt. For him to put aside that characteristic just for her meant so much to the girl, he couldn't even begin to understand it. A sudden wave of warmth crept out from her chest and surged through every muscle, begging, pleading for a releash in the hanyou's touch. What was worse is that his apology sounded sincere, sounded like he needed her to come back to him. And in her state of frailty, she surrendered to her need to be with him, and to her instinct to call out to his soul once more to take her for himself and never let go. "But… I don't need to be mad. I mean… you never had to stick around with us. Yet you do anyway."
The presence of her voice again made his heart choke his lungs and his eyes lit up with a spark of happiness that he knew would grow. But the fire would rise to his cheeks first. His gaze fell to the ground, knowing he had to say it. "But" he mumbled, "I want to."
A smile tugged at her lips until it became the sweetness that was Kagome, but she still didn't turn to look at him quite yet. "And with pathetic humans no less…"
His ears twitched in annoyance of that statement before she continued, "But I can't help but worry you know, when you're gone that long and I don't know where you are."
"I don't want you to worry," he whispered, as if he would be unconscionable for the others to hear the innocent statement.
"I try," she rubbed her temple with her hand, "I really do. But sometimes I wonder if you'll ever trust me enough."
An uncomfortable silence followed, and she wondered if it was asking too much for him to trust her heart and soul like she did him. It soon became apparent that he had moved closer, for she could feel the warmth of his breath on her back. She became paralyzed with the sensation and she even shivered under its heat. Something radiated from him that she didn't understand. A living thing that intertwined with something inside herself and refused to let go. His voice was low and husky, but gentle as she had loved him. "Do you trust me?"
His muscles ripped against his skin in their own aching for her presence. Like they would burst if she left him behind. Inuyasha waited for the answer, praying that he already knew it. There was still so much doubt in his mind. If she did not trust him, would she ever even love him? They say love requires trust, after all. He trusted in himself to become lost in the aura of her, and that her gaze would cause his knees to get weak if she would look at him again. And somehow, although he dared not admit it, a part of him knew that she would forgive him, because that was Kagome. Despite the sweetness of her calling, her unspoken words meant nothing, because it was in her eyes and in the way she smiled at him that would capture him every time. When he looked into her eyes and to her smiling face, he saw both their souls exploding into a rapturous symphony of countless voices, all singing to him. So much was written in those eyes and those lips that he questioned if he had the time to listen to it. Would he even understand it? Twilight that came pouring out of her soul into his communicated something everlasting between them. An understanding that no one else could ever understand but them.
He grunted in surprise when she fell backwards onto him. The weight of her body split his legs open and she fell in between them against his chest. His hands went back to break their fall, and they held his body upright. The redness of his cheeks escalated at her sudden proximity. Her eyes were closed, and her expression was blank, except the faint smile that would never leave her features. Still her mouth remained shut, and she wouldn't answer what he already knew was true. Her eyes opened to gaze at the cloudless night sky. Relishing in his warmth, she snuggled her back against him and tasted her own pleasure of the feeling. The warmth from within her rose to a scorching fire that poisoned her every thought and movement, and she gladly drank from its cup to quench her needs. When she looked out at the valley beyond them, she saw the last sun's rays were still playing upon the fresh green grass. "Summer's almost here," she stated bluntly.
"Keh. What's that got to do with anything?"
He prayed she wouldn't notice how nervous he was getting. It felt strange to have her sitting between his legs, up tightly against him. Her warmth came up even to his nose and he could smell her comfort in his grasp. Somehow… having her so very near to him… to feel her muscles press against his own… felt like something was whole again that hadn't been in a long time. The unheard symphony played repeatedly from within the glow of her touch, bringing his senses a life force of their own. Every voice of it a siren to lull him closer to Kagome. 'How does she do this?'
Even when his hands got tired of holding them both up, he didn't move. A part of him was certain that she would slip from his touch if he did, or that she would run and hide upon realization of how comfortable he was. It only worsened… or got better for him as she turned slightly to wrap her arms around his midsection and rested her ear against his heart. He held his breath in the shock of her closeness. Her knees curled up and she buried herself in deeper to him, like she had never touched him before, like somehow that was all she wanted, and she sighed in her state of bliss. Inuyasha wasn't fairing any better. A blush rose to his cheeks, but he welcomed it now. A smile tugged gently at his lips, begging to share his ecstasy with the world. How he prayed that she would hear his heartbeat and innately know that somehow it was beating only for her, and that it always would, whether she was his or not. Kagome yawned her answer to the question he had already forgotten, "I won't have any more school for a while. I can come back here more often, and we'll find those jewel shards in no time at all."
Her eyes fluttered shut. Afterall, she hadn't slept the night prior and most of the night before that. It was natural that she would be tired. And that was a good enough excuse to cuddle up to him. And it was a good enough excuse for Inuyasha to relax himself. He rested his cheek on top of her head and smiled dreamily into space. "You're tired?"
Her voice was now groggy and slightly disoriented. "I was up all last night waiting for you."
His heart leapt into his throat and he raised his eyebrows to no one. "Keh. For me? You stayed up all night just because I was gone."
More yawns filled her speech. "Someone had to protect the others after all, right?"
He chuckled, and it made Kagome hold onto him tighter. It was his laughter that she always prayed for, but hardly ever received. When it happened, she felt like the happiest, most powerful being on earth. In her unusal state of exhaustion and happiness, one of her hand raised up and traced his jawline once before dropping again. The action caused Inuyasha to nearly whine, and fought back the urge to wake her fully so she could just touch his face again. She was so tired now; she couldn't even hear her thoughts coming out loud. "You're very warm."
The blush rose, as did the heat in his very blood. He sighed and inhaled her scent deeply, so much as to nuzzle her scalp with his nose, for once grateful that she would be too tired to realize it. "Am I?" he replied softly.
She nodded slowly against him and her hair tickled his face in the process. "You could be like… my own personal security blanket, if I wished it."
He gulped a bit and toyed with that thought in his head for a moment. "If you wished it?" Inuyasha thought out loud, but to her, "Tell me, Kagome, what do you wish?"
Her only reply was to snuggle in closer to him and bury her nose into his neck. His chin rested against her temple as his shoulder kept her from falling out of this contact. Whatever Saku was planning, this must have been it. It had to be. Why else would he feel so happy in that moment if she wasn't staying with him forever? Why else would she be so willing to fall asleep against him in the middle of a cold night?
Moreover, the knowledge that he could wake up everyday with her against him like this moved him more than he could say. He knew he could spend forever granting that wish if she wanted it, to hide her away from any pain, discomfort, or fear. In his grasp, if she could find joy or and security, it would be enough for him. He closed his eyes and opened them again just to make sure she wouldn't vanish. Too good to be true was this girl. Too good to be true that she was so willing to be around someone so unworthy as him.
For a while, he considering going back to the hut for them to sleep, but never in a million years did he want to move from this spot. Plus that lecher of a monk would be there to make crude comments. The hanyou found his answer in a large boulder just yards away, one side casting a large shadow. As carefully as he could, he lifted her into his arms and stood up with her in them. When he sat down beneath the merciful shadow of the stone, he glanced back once at the hut and was satisfied that he would not be seen. He then settled back into place with her flush against him, only this time with his arms around her so as to hold her even closer than his own heart. He leaned back against the rock and allowed his eyes to close. 'It'll only be for a little while. When the others are asleep, I'll take her back in. But… at least for now, I can have this right. I need this.'
His heart, he hoped would carry on his own unspoken words from her slumber into her waking hours. He hoped that he could hear her say it back to him with a glance and a smile.
To be continued…
Aaaah… was that good? Tell me how I did, sweetie pies! Catch you all in a few days.
Halli05: Thank God Inuyasha's so stupid. Otherwise this would never work. Hurray! Yes, I am evil. Muhahaha! (hugs)
Kamira: Yeah, just a tad much, but I'm assuming that Inuyasha is kinda irrational and selfish to a certain degree. Hope that ain't assuming too much. (hugs)
nekoxlove: Naraku's planning a surprise party, don't ya know? Hahaha, I'm so lame. That would be one hell of a twist, wouldn't it. Haha! But it will definitely be a surprise. Can't wait for you to figure it out. (hugs)
Inuyasha05: If I'm keeping you in the DARK on this one, it definitely has a purpose. (winks and hugs)
a100rinchhead: Haha, which would be amusing. But he ain't getting off that easy just yet. (hugs)
Helikakileh: And there you have my moral. Well done. (hugs)
Mental Mess: How fitting for my story that Inuyasha is so stupid. Thank you, creators. (hugs)
Random Reader: The more I do this fic, the more he does seem like a dog. Bad Inu, bad bad bad. (hugs)
Viperthe strange: "You killed my father! Prepare to die!" Oh yeah, I love that movie too! Glad you like the story and are willing to stay up late to read it. (hugs)
Caline Daniels: Glad you enjoyed it, and I hope his selfishness isn't too unbelieveable. (hugs)
trekker4life: Totally understand. Need… bed…. Quickly… (hugs)
LaceyBeans: Teehee, the shadow man is my favorite part! I'm so evil! You'll find out eventually. Don't know about soon though. (hugs)
EmeraldShine: OMG, I remember you! Hi hi hi! BTW, I seriously just added a new chapter to my RobStar fic, so I'm hopefully getting back on track with that. Yeah, I've only been watching Inuyasha for a few months. Haha, it's what kinda got me sidetracked from TT, I loved it sooo much. Glad to talk to you again. (hugs)
Jenn-silent breed: Maybe… maybe not… Ain't telling. You can't make me! Nooo! Why do I want to tell you! (hugs)