The Diary of Harry Potter
Entry: 11
Diary,
I'm really starting to get annoyed. Someone really wants to get a hold of me, and they obviously know that their letters aren't going through… today, twelve arrived! Yep, you heard me right: twelve letters. They were pushed under the door, through the sides, and Dudley even found a few forced through the window of the small bathroom.
But can you guess how many I got to read? You guessed right. Zero. Zilch. My stupid bloody uncle, who stayed home from work again, burned every single of them. After that, he got his hammer and nails back out. Why, you ask? Well, he boarded up every single crack and the front and back doors… no one can even get out now! Gee, I hope the house doesn't catch on fire, otherwise we'll all be dead.
I think he might be losing it, Diary. He was humming a bit too merrily as he worked on the doors, and he keeps jumping at every little noise and movement. I'd find it funny if I weren't so angry about not getting my letter.
I'm too mad to write anymore tonight, Diary. Good night.