I really hope you guys haven't lost interest in this story already. I'm getting to the good parts. The truth about Spike comes out in this chapter. I'm proud of this one and I would really love to know what everyone thinks of it. Thanks to those that have reviewed. Don't kill me for the end, I'll have more soon!

Chapter 7

Flashback

"So, what's a pretty thing like you doing here by yourself?" Buffy turned at the voice to notice an attractive man standing next to her. He was wearing a long, leather jacket and had bleach blonde hair. She didn't know why he seemed so familiar, but she didn't think much about it. She was sitting at the Bronze and waiting for Angel.

"Excuse me?" She wondered and he moved closer to her.

"Why are you here alone?" Buffy crossed her arms over her chest and suddenly felt cold.

"I'm waiting for my boyfriend. Who are you?" She said and he gave her a smirk.

"I'm Spike; you'll be getting to know me real well." He told her and she raised her eyebrows.

"Somehow I doubt that. You shouldn't be here when Angel arrives. He's the jealous type." Spike laughed as he shook his head.

"What kind of poncy name is Angel anyway?" Buffy glared at him.

"Right, because your name is so classy. I know who you are now. You're the transfer student from England. I heard you got into a lot of trouble. Now that I've met you, I can see why." She told him with a smile and Spike glared at her this time.

"You don't know anything about me, sweetheart." Buffy stood up and stared right into his eyes.

"I don't intend to." She stated as she tried to walk away, when Spike then grabbed her arm. She turned back to look at him and saw an angry expression on his face. Buffy actually felt scared for a second there. She sighed in relief when she saw that Angel finally showed up. Spike let Buffy go as Angel stared daggers at him.

"What's going on here? Is he bothering you, Buffy?" Angel wondered and Buffy looked at Spike one more time before turning her gaze on her boyfriend.

"No, everything's fine. Let's just dance." She said and Angel nodded as he led her to the dance floor.

End Flashback

"Buffy? Are you alive in there?" Buffy broke out of her daydream by Spike's voice. She looked up to notice that he was staring at her, with concern on his face. "You okay? I've been trying to get your attention for the last few minutes." Buffy nodded and gave him a small smile.

"Yeah, I was just thinking." She said and Spike sat down next to her on the couch.

"What were you thinking about?" He wondered and Buffy thought about what to tell him.

"I was thinking about the first time we met." Spike raised his eyebrows and clearly wasn't expecting that.

"Why would you want to relive that?" Buffy shrugged as she looked at him.

"I don't know. I just keep thinking about how everything's changed since then. You seem so different." Spike let out a sigh.

"I am different. I did actually manage to grow up." Buffy nodded in understanding.

"I know you have; I just still can't believe that you're being so nice to me. I figured you would always hate me." Spike was silent after that and didn't know what to tell her, when Buffy spoke up again. "Can I ask you something?" Spike nodded as he waited for her to continue. "Why did you hate me so much?" She said and he wasn't ready to answer yet.

"Why did you hate me so much?" He asked her instead and Buffy shrugged as she looked away from him.

"I don't think I ever really hated you. You annoyed me and everything, but I never hated you. I kept wondering what I could have done that got you to hate me so much. It seemed to always be there since we first met. I just never understood it. I never told you this, but I overheard you talking about me to your friends. You said that I was a snob and a half-wit. That I didn't have any brains in my pretty, blonde head. I remember feeling so hurt after that. I didn't understand how someone could say such mean things about me when they didn't even know me." She explained as she looked up at him and was confused when she saw him smiling.

"You heard that?" Buffy nodded and still wondered what he found so amusing about it. He decided to clarify for her. "I wasn't talking about you, love. I was talking about that bird, Harmony Kendall. She used to follow me around everywhere and call me these bloody annoying names. She wouldn't leave me alone and I got so irritated that I said some bad things about her." Buffy was embarrassed now.

"Oh, okay then. Let's just pretend I never said anything." Spike nodded and kept the smile on his face.

"It's forgotten, but you were right. I did judge without really getting to know you and I'm sorry about that. You're obviously not the girl I thought you were." Buffy smiled a little and then got back to her earlier question.

"You still never said why you hated me." Spike took a deep breath before he answered her.

"I never hated you, Buffy. It's all so stupid now that I think about it. I was just pissed about everything. I was pissed that I had to move and bloody jealous of Peaches. I hated the git and I envied him. I was just frustrated and I took a lot of it out on you and I shouldn't have." Buffy was surprised and clearly wasn't expecting him to say that.

"Why would you be jealous of Angel?" Spike sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Because I wanted you. From the first moment I saw you, I wanted you. You were all I bloody thought about, Buffy. I hated seeing you with him. So, I guess I tried to hide my feelings by fighting with you all of the time. I have to admit that it was lots of fun." He told her with a smile and she returned it. "I decided to head back to England after graduation because I just couldn't be in Sunnydale anymore. I couldn't be around you and not have you, so I left to try and forget about you." Buffy took in what he was saying and still couldn't believe it.

"Did it work?" She wondered and he shook his head.

"No, it didn't work. You were still all I thought about and I guess that was one reason I decided to come back. I knew I couldn't stay away anymore. Not to mention that things got worse in England. I just couldn't deal with it any longer." Buffy took his hand in hers and hoped that he would open up to her more. He looked surprised and only gave her hand a squeeze.

"What happened?" She asked and it was at that moment that Spike realized he would tell her anything.

"My mum passed away recently, which you already know about. She was the only person that I really had. There was also a girl." Spike closed his eyes and took a breath before he gave her the rest of his story. He then opened his eyes again and saw nothing but concern on her face. "I met her at a bar and we were drawn to each other. I just wanted to forget about you and I knew she would be a distraction. We both agreed that we would have fun and nothing else. No strings attached. We ended up sleeping together that same night and it was nice. I think it was something we both needed. We parted the next morning on good terms and I figured I would never see her again." Spike looked down and felt tears in his eyes. Buffy grew even more concerned now.

"Spike, what is it?" She wondered and he couldn't hide the tears when he looked back up at her.

"I screwed up, Buffy. I saw her again about a month after that and she told me that she was pregnant with my child. I saw how scared she was and I knew that I couldn't let her deal with it alone. I decided that I was going to be there for her and the baby. I was with her through everything and we formed a close friendship, but we knew it would never be anything more than that because both of our hearts belonged to someone else. I took her to the hospital when she went into labor and I was with her during the birth, but there were complications. She...She died after the baby was born. I got to see my child for a little while after that. She was so tiny, Buffy. I've never seen anything so small. She only lived to be a few weeks old." Buffy gasped at everything he said as she brought her hand to her mouth.

"God, I'm so sorry." She stated when she removed her hand and Spike wiped at his eyes. It was still a hard memory to relive. "Is that why you were scared when you were in the hospital with me? You thought the same thing would happen?" Spike looked away from her and nodded.

"I was bloody terrified. I never wanted to go through that again. You don't know how relieved I was to find out that both of you were okay." Buffy nodded also as she started to feel tears in her eyes. He really did care about her. She then moved closer to him and knew what she wanted to do. Buffy cupped his face and brought his gaze back on hers. She was soon pressing her lips to his.