Yami's koi: okay, THIS time I have an actual excuse for this update being so late… I've had exams. And I know this will sound really stupid, but my mom doesn't want me to fail and be stuck with the really thick people for the next two years. Therefore, I have actually had to revise for these pathetic little exams. And I've been in France for four days, and then I had my birthday, which was on the 28th May, hint, hint.
Neutral Man: the exams weren't too bad…
Yami's koi: that's what you think. Anyway… new chapter, new story… almost. See you at the bottom!
I stride along the corridors of the winding, almost unfathomable Kaiba Mansion. Fuck, I really should have grabbed some sort of map, or printed out the exact location where Mokuba lay… but NO! I had to trust my mind yet again, and just head off in the vague direction of wherever!
Still… I am so disheartened. I could not prevent Mokuba's death… and I have failed Seto. Now there is hardly any way left on this earth that I will be able to solve the mystery of who killed Jou… and who shot Seto. At this rate, I'll never get back to Bakura… or fulfil the wishes of the Gods… same difference.
Like I have said before, I believe that it is one person who has committed both crimes. I won't begin to point any fingers just yet, partially because I am still in denial about most of what has happened in this odd, twisted world. Therefore, I have begun to list those least likely to have been involved in such devastation. At least that way is less painful than considering others being murderers. So far, this is my list of those most unlikely to have… you know what:
Isis. Myself. Bakura. Yugi. Malik. Seto. Jou. Mokuba.
I did not include Marik or Yami because… they have, in this demented world, been cruel and threatening to me. Out of everyone I have met so far in this world, they have been the most violent and potentially lethal. I do not like it, but that is just the way it is.
I follow the path of blood. I note that the blood is more in amount in these corridors: a chilling warning that I am swiftly approaching where Mokuba's dead body lies.
Or does it mean that… no, no way. I quicken my pace. Oh Ra, please prove my prediction as wrong! It can't be… they would never… unless…
Bakura
It's the final countdown to a bomb being detonated here. Yami's face us one of anger as he strides in, furious that I knew of his intentions all along. Jou sits down with a bit more calm than the Pharaoh, yet I can prove that he really is itching to know why I have called. Yugi, the innocent one that was needlessly brought into this chaos, sits down without any form of emotion. Amethyst eyes stare soullessly at the floor, until suddenly he speaks.
"Jou has one of those marks we have, too."
His voice is so cold and empty that I am taken aback for a moment. I cannot recover, however, when Jou also begins to speak.
"Hey, don't forget Seto has one, too!"
I won't go into why and how Jou knows that Seto has a mark on him. I am more concerned about the way in which they will react when I inform them of what the Gods have been putting my darling Ryou through.
Poor, little Ryou. He must feel so alone… going through such misery, all for me. I feel that I am unworthy, and yet I am also very humbled by the fact that he would endure such madness to see me again. It gives me something to set my sights on… in a weird way.
"Arigato. A few hours ago, I figured out a way to see Ryou again."
Yugi's eyes seem to gain some of their usual brightness, and his cheeks obtain some form of colour. He seems happy at the news, anyway. His yami looks very impressed, and Jou… seems to be as much of a dumbass as he will always be.
"So, what was it, Bakura? Why hasn't it worked?"
I grin evilly. I am so corrupt at times… I can't even recall the last time I got so high from informing others of what they don't already know… oh, it's bliss. Believe me.
"It involved me killing myself so that I could join Ryou in death."
Their hopeful, happy demeanours fade instantly.
Ryou
My theory was right.
Dark, sapphire eyes glare at me, so darkly and icily that I knew just how correct I had been. Those eyes that once showed both innocence and happiness… were lost into the hopeless, suffocating abyss of madness. Pale cheeks were stained a dark, dry red colour, so alluring and pretty in the dimming light. I wish that his heart was the nice looking thing that represented him… and not the blood. Raven-black hair with hints of violet that spikes around his youthful face, obscuring his eyes some. There is no doubt about it anymore.
"Mokuba!"
"That's right. So you found me. I congratulate you on making it this far… but you are far from the truth." The slightly husky, sharp voice stated, so blunt and strong.
I shake slightly… I have no forms of weaponry, and yet he is bearing a tool that I once loved to stare upon as it cut through my skin. In addition to this, he carries a… oh god.
He's carrying a gun.
He notices my quick scan of his body and entire self, and begins to laugh harshly. Mokuba's laugh has also evolved… it is not the merry tone that it used to be. It is now shallow, and seemingly forced.
However, it does seem to hold just a little bit of mockery within it, and so I cannot help but think that maybe I am mistaken. Perhaps a dark, evil creature, victim to many hurts and emotional injuries in this world… is possessing Mokuba. Maybe this is another dream… yet not a prophetic nor present events one. Please let that be it. I can't bear it if my thoughts… the realistic ones… are true.
"Wondering why I'm carrying this?" He asks, waving it in front of my face, "Oh, I'm actually quite surprised what's happened hasn't made you notice this sooner… or find out the truth." Mokuba says, his lips curving into a sour, cruel smirk. It makes me want to shiver.
"I don't know what you mean, Mokuba." I insist softly, yet firmly. My eyes can barely leave the tools that can create so much harm to a human being. Mokuba has absolutely no need to carry such things. There is no doubt in my mind that he must be, slowly, going insane. Maybe that's why Seto told me to watch how he was… yes, that must be it.
"Fucking hell. Must I explain even the most blatantly obvious things to you? Fuck, even that pathetic, whining Mutt my brother had as a boyfriend would have caught on now… even if he is a little… dead now." A smirk. "Is that a big enough hint?"
I tremble. This is a nightmare. I don't want to accept the truth that is right before my eyes, and never do I want to cause any harm to Mokuba. However… I may have to. It may be the only way to save both him and myself.
"Mokuba, I don't understand. Tell me what you're implying and then I can be off." I say firmly, getting impatient. Many would consider it a bad move, considering the fact that Mokuba is wielding both a knife and a gun, yet it seems to be the only way of getting some interaction from him.
Mokuba stares at me in obvious disbelief.
"Well, well, well. From the looks of you, you're even dumber than I thought. Why can't you just face the facts?"
"WHAT facts, Mokuba!"
I can visibly see his self-control horribly slip. His face contorts, forming an ugly, snarling child's face, so angry for reasons that I dare not confirm.
I do think, however, that I will face such a terrifying truth shortly. And what he said next not only made my blood run cold, but made me flinch back in horror.
"THE FACTS THAT I KILLED KATSUYA JONOUCHI AND SHOT MY OWN BROTHER!"
A stinging sensation manifests itself in the corners of my eyes, and I whimper internally. So, my instincts have been confirmed… poor, precious little Mokuba has committed murder. And again he attempted to do so… to his own bastard of a brother.
Are you prepared to battle, little one? Those were the words that had once emitted from Shadow's – Mokuba's – lips, just before he killed Jonouchi. My hands shake as I fully comprehend what this means. Mokuba's heart is so corrupt, his mind so very poisoned by all that is bad – basically, most things - by everything in this world… that I doubt anything can save him now.
But to say 'little one,' when you are so many years younger than that one you are about to kill… it is too much, too immoral.
I must know why. Curious, I raise my tear-splattered face up to meet with Mokuba's… and regard the eyes of a killer with wariness. He has killed once, so he can do it ever so easily again. It won't take much to finish off this worn, tired, emotionally shattered body.
"Mokuba… why? Why would you kill the thing that had brought so much happiness into Seto's life?"
Mokuba snorts. "Answer your own question, why don't you."
I raise an eyebrow now, my mind still hazy and paralysed with shock. Nothing can connect properly… I have had to deal with so much in such a short space of time, and my brain won't cope with anymore. The mental pressure has become too much for my senses to handle, and so I must rest behind a fog of both bewilderment and misunderstanding until I am mentally healthy again.
I inhale shakily. "What do you mean, I've answered my own question?"
Mokuba glares at me.
"His happiness has been at my expense, you idiot," He hisses coldly, his blade glistening in the light as he raises it to the light for a casual inspection whilst he speaks. "Ever since that bastard Seto has been spending time with that dick, Katsuya Jonouchi…" He smirks as he sees that his choices of words are angering me, causing my emotions to spiral out of control. "…I have been the one on my own, even though Seto always promised me that he would always be there, no matter what. Ever since that great puppy of his has been his so-called lover, I've had to be on my own. No one to talk to. No one to cry to. No one to make plans with.
"I've had to watch them, for so many months now, sneaking off to have a quick 'play' when they were supposed to be doing something actually worth spending time on. I've watched them go out together, loving each other, whilst I've been left there in the dark, with no one to save me. My brother was stolen away from me by that bastard… so I made him pay."
Mokuba grinned harshly at my silence. He regards my face intently; obviously pleased at the reactions his words have caused.
"It was me who arranged for his precious sister to walk underneath that cliff that day. It was me who dropped that stone onto her head, making it look like an accident by declaring the cliff as unsafe. Yes… you should have seen his face when he saw that his sister was dead. So beautiful… and so dead. It was priceless, and it meant more to me than any other form of punishment ever could."
"But that wasn't enough, was it?" I ask coldly, realising what has happened. "You had to destroy the light in Seto's life. All because you were jealous of the happiness you shared… all because you wanted to be noticed and loved by your brother again. Even though it meant he would be unhappy for the rest of his living days because Jou was gone, you killed him anyway. So thoughtless of the consequences that it would bring."
Mokuba's face turns sour.
Bakura
The Pharaoh's reaction, predictably, was immediate.
"You didn't."
"Bakura, you're still alive… how could you have--"
"Aw, man, this is some Egyptian black magic crap, isn't it!"
I frown slightly at that.
"Yes, Jonouchi, black magic. Or, at least, that's what I concluded when I spoke to Ra and Osiris, those kinky freaks."
It takes just a moment for everyone to fully comprehend that statement. Jou, however, remains obviously clueless. Not that I expected him to actually understand what I was trying to say without actually saying it, just leaving subtle hints, but I thought he had a dirty mind? Surely he should get that?
Still, recent events have changed me more than what I have liked, so I can't blame him. It seems that even he can't find any light in Ryou's death, and that I am grateful for.
Because I would eternally hate him if he did.
"Basically, what I'm trying to say is that they are now lovers. They kissed, held hands, did all of the things they should do… when deep inside, I'm bleeding because of what I have lost."
Yugi sighs and stares at his hands, and I'm secretly glad that he's exhaled that small gush of air. It tells me more than what he is feeling, but also hints at what he is to say next.
"Enough chit-chat! Bakura, when did you think of that? And how did you even get to speak to Ra and Osiris, I thought they--" He pauses when he sees my sad smile, comprehension dawning on his face, "—Oh, god…"
Yami's eyes narrow even more so, understanding also why I was darkly smiling. I just hope that Katsuya over there doesn't think that I am looking like this to look pretty.
Likely, ne?
"Bakura… you killed yourself to be with Ryou?" The Pharaoh splutters, earning a rewarding smirk from me as I nod.
"Hai. Oh, it was painful," I added, watching in a sick pleasure as Yami's face paled, "But I was willing to endure that for my Ryou."
"But why," Yugi enquires now, still unable to look into his own love's eyes, in respect for how I am currently feeling (I think), "Did the Gods let you back, when Ryou's in fuck-knows where land?"
The use of the 'vile' word from such an innocent hikari's mouth seemed to stir Jou and Yami from their distant trances, both probably about things that I dare not talk about. I grin, however, darkly, knowing that, maybe, after all of this is through, Yugi may never be as pure as he used to be. Perhaps, I think, as I stare out into space, listening to the rain pounding against the windows, that may not be such a bad thing. Because with purity comes naivety, and with naivety often comes foolishness. As much as I can detest Yugi, I can't help but cringe when he sometimes is generally misunderstood or, rather, disliked due to his uncommon nature.
Yet that is the way things are with those who decide to separate themselves from the crowd. They are seen as weird, just because they dare to differ from those who look and act like everyone around them. And for what? Just to fit in? Credibility?
Ryou, however, was different. And yet he was liked and accepted by these select few, and another small group, and known as a friend. Often he was quiet, and was academically more successful than everyone else, but… perhaps it was just the way he shrugged it off, perhaps it was just the way that he covered up the fact that he had studied the night before with an excuse of feeling unwell… and for that, my precious Ryou was accepted. If only he could be faring as well as what he did in this world… if only he could see that not everything was bad when he took his own life.
If only…
"Bakura, answer me before I decide this is a total waste of my time." Yugi said firmly, eyes full of impatience. They were still directed at the floor.
I sigh. "My apologies. Really. But the Gods let me back to this world… was because that the event wasn't supposed to have happened. And because… if I had gone to where Ryou had…" I hesitate; taking in a deep breath, though I don't know why. "… Then there would be no more reason for him to return."
Yami nods, once again fully seeing the hidden words that I had cleverly hidden in my sentences. Again…
"Er, a little help, Bakura? What da hell do ya mean? I'm not as clever as Yami, so I can't understand all dat much!"
I feel anger bubbling within me. I quickly suppress it, knowing that I can't afford to be alone in this world without Ryou. I can't believe it, but I think I've actually become dependant on having people who I know around me, sharing my pain in a way that I can partially understand.
I still believe, however, that I am the bearer of a greater regret… a greater sorrow. That is why I took my own life: no one else attempted it, no one else did anything.
"What I meant was that when Ryou committed suicide, he thought that you had all abandoned him because you were all so very preoccupied with your own lives and lovers. So that was another factor for when he killed himself, but, even so--"
"SHUT UP! URUSAI, URUSAI, URUSAI!" Yugi screams, leaping from his chair and hurtling towards me. He falls at my feet, beating his small fists against my legs repeatedly. He cannot hurt me, but I don't understand why he would react in such a way. But as I see Yami rushing forward to pull him off of me, I fear the worst.
"Yugi, what da hell?" Jou asks, assisting Yami. The small, distressed hikari points a trembling finger at me.
"HIM! IMPLYING THAT WE WERE THE ONES THAT DROVE RYOU OFF THE EDGE! BUT ANSWER THIS, BAKURA! IF HE LOVED YOU SO MUCH, THEN WHY WOULD HE NOT HOLD ONTO THE HOPE THAT YOU'D LOVE HIM BACK! YOU WERE STILL ABUSING HIM, WEREN'T YOU? YOU NEVER CARED ABOUT HIM, YOU ONLY EVER CARED ABOUT HAVING SOME PRETTY LITTLE PERSON HANGING OFF YOUR ARM JUST TO LOOK GOOD! SO WHY DON'T YOU JUST BACK OFF, FUCK OFF, AND ACCEPT THAT FOR ONCE, SOMETHING WAS YOUR FAULT!"
Those last words that he utters… they drive a thousand daggers through my heart, causing my Soul Room to illuminate with the piercing light of both realisation and pure, blinding hurt.
Those words are making me think now. I shake as I stare down at the sobbing light, being comforted by his friend and lover. Shake as I realise that, yes, Ryou would have had hope that I would love him back… so why DID he kill himself?
"Yug, I dunno if that was da right thing to say," Jou says seriously, but somehow gently.
Yugi gives him a look that suggests he is mad.
"If you haven't noticed, I don't care. Bakura should stop assuming it was just us and realise that he was somehow connected to Ryou's suicide. I don't give a toss anymore… not after this…"
Ryou… do you honestly hate me that much?
Ryou
"And I bet you didn't organise what you did earlier to your own brother, did you, Mokuba?" I say his name so savagely that I think he may have flinched in surprise. Someone as innocent as me cannot feel anger like everyone else? Fuck off. At the end of the day, we hikari's are naught but human beings. We have all-too human feelings, some of which are uncontrollable in times of discomfort and toil, and we bleed and cry like everyone else. Taking myself as an example, not all of us remain pure forever. Just my name now… is enough to remind anyone of the fateful, destroyed hikari that became something struggling to sustain himself in a foreign… yet definitely familiar place.
Mokuba grins at me evilly, his eyes flashing with glee.
"Right again, clever one. I took the gun from my brother's office room… one that he always keeps under his desk, just in case of emergencies and people trying to harm his precious Jou…" He pauses for a moment, a look of smug bitterness in his eyes, before carrying on, "… And I made sure that it was loaded. I calculated the exact time that he would leave work, with you, and then I aimed. I aimed, and then my finger caressed the trigger before pulling it down and shooting my brother.
"Oh, I was nervous. Seriously. You try shooting your own brother, when he's in a car, driving, with someone in the passenger seat. It wasn't easy in physical terms. But emotionally, I was practically alive with joy. For once, I would be the only one in Seto's miserable life where I would be praised for all my hard work. I could have been so dear to him, especially after his bastard's death… but then I realised, just as I saw the blood splatter the windscreen, just as I saw you running out of the car, rushing to see Seto's broken body. I realised that I wanted more.
"I want Seto's death. I want him to see me for the last moment of his life, to have him die whilst staring up into my triumphant, smiling face, whilst he dies from the shock of the emotion… and from however I plan to torture him first."
I smile grimly. "Not a good idea to broadcast your ideas, Mokuba."
He smirks back, much darker than what I could ever once imagine from someone so young… so pure.
"… But now that you know, I don't intend on letting you go, little one. I have to kill you now, too."
My joyless smile disappears. I am now wracked with worry. He holds a gun in his hand, whilst I carry nothing. I reach out behind me to stagger backwards, and I immediately rise to break out into a desperate run. My steps thunder beneath me, and I hear Mokuba's own footsteps about seven meters behind me.
I am startled by the first gunshot. It misses me by inches. He's serious. I'm not leaving this mansion alive.
But I won't give up. I've got Bakura to look forward to, and I'm not about to just die on him, like a weak, little loser. Oh no. Not after this… not after all that I have suffered.
I quicken my pace, panting as my asthma gets to me. I gasp heavily, my arms moving faster to aid my speed somewhat. Again I hear another crack of a gunshot, but this one smashes a painting's frame just in front of me. Shards of glass fly everywhere, and I divert my track and dart through various doors, speeding past corridor after corridor, until I hear Mokuba's steps getting fainter and fainter. I look back, and quickly reach for my cell phone.
"Come on, come on come on come on!" I whisper desperately, almost heaving with the need for more oxygen in my body.
"Emergency services, which service do you require?"
"P-Police, please," I gasp, clutching at my side as a stitch begins to form, "I'm at the Kaiba Mansion… please, come quickly."
The woman's calm, cool voice answered, "We shall be with you in a matter of minutes."
"Thanks," I manage, before hanging up. Then I feel the hairs on the back of my neck standing up, and I listen carefully, quietening my wheezing slightly. I hear footsteps… frantic ones. And I can only associate that with one thing…
Unless I move right now, I'm going to die.
Bakura
"Bakura?"
I had left the room to collect myself… and to force my food to resurface. And now, as I stand here, staring down into the sink, the toilet flushing as it discards what feels like my innards… I hear Yami's voice. He doesn't sound pissed off, but rather calm and collected.
"Hai."
I don't state it as a question purely because it shall get me absolutely nowhere. He will say what he will anyway, so doing such a thing won't affect the outcome of anything.
"I'm sorry."
Now, that I wasn't expecting. I raise my head, and turn, leaning against the cool sink. I stare into his eyes, and, for a moment, the surroundings melt away.
I am in Egypt again. My long, unruly bangs caress the scar on my cheek softly, as I sneer and mock the Pharaoh by presenting him with the battered, foul smelling corpse of his father. I see his tanned, youthful face drain of colour, and I see his eyes filled with both shock and sorrow. How could I stoop so low? I would do anything to get those Millennium Items…
And now, the flashback is gone. We are both dressed in our normal, modern-day clothes, my hair is still wild and long… but just to be sure, I lift my fingers up to my face, tracing over where my scar should have been. It is gone.
"You're… sorry." I say, my voice oddly devoid of all emotion, but still very husky and pained. "You shouldn't be. You're just making yourself hurt for no reason. If you feel the same way as your hikari, then go home. I mean it."
He sighs and stares into my probably tired-looking, slightly red eyes. His expression is one of concern and of exasperation.
"We've all been… under a lot of emotional stress because of what has happened over the past few days, Bakura, and I think Yugi just broke. You see how he was so quiet and secluded earlier? That's because I could feel his anger, and all the emotions he's feeling right now about to shatter. His control would go, and he would say what he never meant."
I laugh sourly. "But he has made me see the truth. I am nothing more but another nail in Ryou's coffin."
"Don't say that." Yami pleads now, stepping forwards and gazing at me with imploring eyes. "Honestly, this isn't the first time he's done this, and I've been hurt by it in the past, but please, Bakura… please. Just understand that this has affected more than just you."
"You know something, I know that!" I snap, the all-too familiar feeling of anger rising at the Pharaoh's slow, dim-witted understanding range, "And I also know something else: that is just clarifying what Yugi just said. I… don't care anymore. I really just don't care.
"But you know something else? I think that maybe I feel like breaking down and telling a few home truths, but I never do that because that's what I was when I was a Tomb Robber. It hurts, oh yes, it hurts like hell, keeping the truth in from those who you hate… but that makes me so much of a better person than Yugi, don't you think?"
He says nothing. He knows that I am right, and can't do a thing about it. I turn back to stare down at the sink, and I can hear him shuffling slightly.
"I know. And I'm sorry."
I raise my head once more, but do not look at him.
"I used to hate you, you know…"
This time I can't help but turn and face him. I try to smirk, but it turns out to look more like a weak, very weak smile.
"Likewise."
Ryou
And so it begins again. I inhale a deep, glorious breath of fresh air before starting again. I listen to the thundering of Mokuba's feet behind me, know very well that he is still holding a gun in his small but deadly hands.
At any moment now, I know that I can die.
But if I do, the only thing I will regret is not realising just how much I loved Bakura. I'll regret not valuing him enough to stay on earth, no matter how bad things were, when he was there, always beside me, when ever I was hurt.
I am drawn back to reality by another gunshot. Again, the bullet misses me, but they are increasingly nearing me every time Mokuba fires. I fear that the last thing I will feel is pain, and suddenly I realise that I can't go through that again. And I also realise that if I do die, I will not die running away. I will hold him off until the police arrive.
I stop and turn, glaring into burning sapphire eyes. They narrow and the gun is raised to Mokuba's orbs so that he can aim. I hear his finger touch the trigger, and it is then that I make my move. I hastily vault over the nearby banister, landing just three feet below. He curses loudly and approaches the railings, firing wildly. He does not, however, see me sneak back up the staircase.
I see Mokuba's back now, can see his eyes frantically scanning the below areas to locate me and kill me. If I hesitate or am too loud, then this will fail and all of my dreams shall remain dead, nothing but history.
Cautious, but not too slowly, I advance upon the small form before me. He is still unaware of my presence, and so I use this to my advantage. Gripping my hands together into a large fist, I bring it slamming down, right into the middle of Mokuba's back. He arches forwards, slamming his stomach and legs into the railings before him. This will not be a permanent solution, but he will, at least, be stunned.
In conclusion to this hazardous, but also very clever, move, I begin my descent downwards again. I have no need for staircases, but the impact of gravity sometimes stuns me for a moment, causing pain to shot throughout my foot before I am persuaded to venture on, my footsteps echoing downwards, down until I feel that I cannot run no more.
But still, I must carry on. For if I stop now… then Mokuba will kill me.
Yami's koi: ah ha! A cliffie, you see? It is a good technique that everyone hates me for, I know, but nevermind. It usually gives me reviews.
Neutral Man: but you carry on torturing them until you get at least 100 reviews?
Yami's koi: well, that's the plan. Do you think it'll work? Only YOU, the reader, can make it happen! Review me today and not only will you get to see what happens to Ryou, Mokuba, Seto and Bakura, but you'll also win the most sensational opportunity… EVER! I now have a account, and even though I haven't uploaded very much yet, there are currently five pictures on there! I am under the user name yamiskoi, so if any of you lovely readers want to drop me a little bit of advice, please, feel free to do so! Also, I am considering taking requests, and, as soon as my exams and revision are over, I can begin to think about drawing some angsty fan art to go with this fic… and others! What do you think? Please review me and I'll see what I can do! My final exam, until November-ish time, is on the 28/6/05, 6/28/05 if you're American. Grins.
Neutral Man: yeah, so review and tell her what to do. I think she sucks, but I don't even like manga/anime… or yaoi. Or yuri. Or lemons.
Yami's koi: yeah, yeah, whatever. Ja ne, readers! Please R&R!