AN: Alright, things are going to be picking up a bit in this chapter, in regards to the timeline that is. This chapter spans exactly one week, so it'll be kinda jumpity. I can see the next few chapters being like this also 'cause I really want to get things moving along now.
And beware of the fluff! Actually treasure the fluff in this chappie 'cause there won't be a lot of it in my story. I have plans you see...:shifty eyes:
And that's it. Enjoy!
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Courage Needs You – Chapter #12
Wednesday afternoon, 3:29pm. Weather: overcast. Company: Kakashi. Destination: field 10km due east.
Five days since Kakashi's confession and Taka and Kisho's return.
Four days since seeing Ino and Tenten; Ino's mission return date: tomorrow.
Three days since Naruto left on a mission; return: three days from today.
One day since seeing Sasuke; reason for visit: undetermined.
Number of times Sakura visited Kakashi's apartment in the last five days: five.
"What are you doing?"
"Thinking."
"About…?"
"Life; the last few days; you…me."
"Aa."
"Kakashi?"
"Hmm?"
"Tell me a story."
"Aren't you a little old for stories?"
"Maybe, but tell me one anyway."
He tilted his head back against the trunk, eyes surveying the tree's bows above him. Sakura was leaning against his chest and between his legs, repeatedly popping open and closing the button on his shuriken holster. It was endearing in a way he couldn't explain.
"There once was a girl–"
"Is this girl me?"
"No; just listen. There once was a girl who was the most beautiful girl in the village, but for all her beauty, she did not possess a heart. Everyday she would have suitors requesting her hand in marriage. They would offer her jewels and silks and land and titles, if only she would return their love. In response, she would always say, 'I'm sorry, I am unable to love one such as thee'.
"One day she was in her grove of apple trees, when a man approached her, sword at his hip and dressed in filthy rags. 'I have traveled many miles and seen many things but alas, I have never seen such beauty. Please, tell me your name,' he implored. The beautiful girl laughed and sneered at the man. 'Go away, there is nothing you can possibly offer me in turn,' she said.
"Saddened, the man said, 'I may not have much to offer, but I promise to love you for as long as I live.' The girl laughed and scoffed. 'I could never love one such as thee!' Enraged by her ugly nature, the man pulled his sword from its sheath and stabbed the girl through her heart, pinning her to an apple tree.
"Startlingly, the girl did not die. 'So I see,' the man said. 'You do not have a heart and are unable to die. Tell me that you love me and I shall release you from this fate.'
"Terrified of being pinned to an apple tree for the rest of her life, the girl tried to speak the words, but sadly she was unable, for she didn't have a heart and could not declare such a statement.
"'If you are not able, I will leave you pinned to this tree everyday until you are capable of telling me that you love me,' he said, before walking away, leaving the beautiful girl in sorrow.
"Everyday the man returned, and everyday she was unable to tell him that she loved him. Days turned to months, and months turned to a year. Finally the girl could not take anymore and beseeched the heavens. 'Please, I beg of you, bestow upon me a heart so I am able to love.'
"The heavens, sympathizing with the girl, granted her wish and released her from the tree, bearing her a heart in return. Ecstatic, the girl ran through her grove to tell the man only to find him already approaching. She quickly told him the heavens had taken pity upon her and granted her a heart, enabling her to love.
"Happy, the man hugged her. 'Tell me the words I have been waiting to hear,' he said. Smiling, the girl nodded. 'I…I…' only the words would still not come out. Impatient, the man said, 'Why are you still unable to say it?'
"Confused, the girl only shook her head. 'I don't understand' she said. 'I have a heart, so why am I still unable to tell you?'
"Furious once more by her rejection, the man pulled a dagger from his boot and stabbed the girl in the heart once more. Blood poured from her wound and she died shortly after."
Kakashi peered to the side, tucking stray pink hairs behind Sakura's ear, enabling him to see her expression. "Do you know what the moral of the story is?"
Sakura's brow scrunched in thought, as she drew lazy circles in the middle of his palm. "That men are violent beasts who try to dominate women?" She grinned up at him.
Kakashi arched his silvery brow. "I suppose you could view it like that. The moral is supposed to be that just because you have a heart, doesn't mean you are capable of loving."
"Hmm…" she paused, eyes blank with thought. "Or that love can't be forced."
"That too."
"Or it could also mean that heartlessness keeps you alive."
He frowned. "That's a pessimistic view on life."
"Well, it was your story," she emphasized, jabbing him in the thigh with her finger.
"If I remember correctly, it was a certain pink haired kunoichi who requested a childish story in the first place," he countered.
Growling low in her throat, she tried to push off him, only to have his arms snake around and hold her in place. She leaned back into him compliantly, smiling on the inside that he refused to let her go. "Well I never told you what kind of story to tell. That was totally up to you," she said, continuing their dispute.
"Here, I have another story. There once was a girl with pink hair and green irises," Sakura rolled her eyes, "who completely disrupted a certain silver-haired, handsome, intelligent, strong and capable man's life."
Oh brother.
She hoped this story was short.
"And when the man tried to help her train, she would tenaciously refuse and ask him to tell her stories instead."
She elbowed him in the gut, earning a little 'oomph' from him for her trouble. "I'm not stubborn!" Alright so that was a lie. "And I don't always slack off during training," although she always wanted to. "And this is the first time I asked you to tell me a story," excluding the second time she was in his apartment. But anecdotes about his past didn't count.
"Hmm? Who said I was talking about you?" he asked; countenance innocent.
Jade eyes glowered at him over her shoulder. "Fine, I have a story of my own. There once was a silver-haired jerk whose ego was so big that it earned itself the title of 'First walking continent'."
He intermitted. "That was a pretty crappy story," he said finally, tone a matter-of-fact.
"Ugh!"
Grunting, she tried to pry his fingers off from around her waist, and squirmed to be let free. He started chuckling and pulled her back against him.
"I'm teasing, I'm teasing," he said, laughter ringing in his speech. "Relax."
Giving him one last view of her miffed expression, she sulked and crossed her arms, Kakashi's silent mirth still vibrating into her back.
Things certainly had changed between them, she mused, going over memories and conversations of the last few days. She still hadn't told him how she felt, even though she was pretty confident in the answer. Kakashi too hadn't brought up his own sentiments, not since the first day he told her, and even then it had been evasive. He hadn't said he loved her, hadn't even said he liked her; just that he didn't want anyone to touch her and that he was jealous when someone had.
Which reminded her, she still had a score to settle with Yukio; taking advantage of her like that then hitting her when she had slighted his ego by calling out another's name. She was still slightly miffed that someone had beaten her to the punch and had broken all of his fingers – stealing away both her revenge and satisfaction.
Her overwrought muscles caused by recollections of Yukio, unwound as Kakashi unconsciously traced the length of her arm with his fingers, lazy and arbitrary in its pattern. She had discovered two days ago that long interludes of silence between them was actually comforting and soothing, sometimes even more enjoyable than any conversation they could have.
She had also discovered that they had a knack for arguing with one another; not passionate arguments per se, but heated discussions which usually led to his amusement and her vexation. It made her wonder for a fleeting moment if he stoked her inner flame on purpose just to have a good laugh and rile her up. No doubt the option was plausible since it was considering Kakashi; the man with no reservation unlike herself.
It made her deliberate her position now with him, feeling the slow movements of his chest rising and falling – the warmth of his body – the smell of his skin. Only last week things had been much different, contact between them being awkward at first, at least on her part, too shy to actually initiate anything and let him make the moves with the possibility of rejection.
On Saturday it hadn't been more than a few brushes of contact – an arm bumping here, a hand lingering longer than usual; a proximity that kept them gratuitously close without actually touching. It almost felt like they had taken a huge leap backwards in terms of contact when she thought of the way he had touched her a few days prior.
She ruminated the idea that he felt he had been too quick too bold too soon with her, and in result had deliberately slowed things down between them. If that was the truth and he was holding back, she wondered if it was because of her age.
Sunday had been interesting, nearly giving her a heart attack when he had showed up at her door – her, coming down the stairs to see her father making idle chit chat with the man who had less than pure intentions with his daughter. Not that Kisho knew of course, or else Kakashi wouldn't be living and Sakura would have had a two-foot leash strapped to her wrist which connected to her father.
"Would you like to get some extra training in today, Sakura?" he had asked, knowing fully well her answer would be a blunt no, but also knowing she was bright enough to know he was implying something entirely different.
She had looked at him skeptically, before giving a curious nod and charged upstairs to change into her training outfit.
Her parents had been ostensibly pleased; glad she was willing to train on her day off – that or they were just plain pleased she was leaving the house.
Taka had even expressed gratitude to the Copy-nin, telling him she was delighted by the fact that he was spending extra time with Sakura, privately training and taking care of her.
If she only knew, Sakura had thought.
Kakashi had only graciously accepted the praise, leaving no room for suggestion or implications of a hidden agenda with their daughter. He was just about to ask her parents how their mission had fared, when Sakura had snagged him by his arm and shuffled him out of her house.
Watching him casually converse with her parents had just been too nerve-racking to bear. At least it had been then, reminiscing about it now she supposed it had been sort of funny, but no where near humorous enough to wish for a repeat.
Monday things had progressed considerably in the means of contact. They were in a position much the same as now, yet he had been reading Icha Icha Violence and she had been reading a romance novel suggested by Tenten.
She had been stiff and uneasy at first, feeling uncomfortable as arrows of pain shot up and down her spine, her back unwilling to relax into his chest. Kakashi hadn't commented, however he surely must have noticed even though his attention had been directed towards his book.
After half an hour, her spine finally gave out, her back going limp against his chest, bashful from the sudden physical contact. He had remained taciturn, relaxed as he flipped a page in his book, either oblivious or not choosing to remark on her behaviour. Something she had been utterly grateful for.
It had taken her another half hour to be fully unperturbed, and as soon as the moment struck, she wondered how she could have ever felt awkward to begin with.
And it wasn't just their rapport altering either; she noticed subtle changes in herself additionally. She smiled more, and laughed, also got angry and nettled more frequently too.
It was like her puppet suddenly got strings, bringing it to life, refurbishing the wood and glossing up her paint. She was almost fit to perform on stage again – blessed with the capability to wear different emotional masks, replacing the blank one she had been performing with before.
"Kakashi, do I really disrupt your life?" she asked, suddenly remembering his taunt.
His fingers halted their dance on her arm. "Yes." He felt her stiffen against him, shocked or hurt he couldn't ascertain unless he forced her to look at him. The cliché saying 'eyes are the window to your soul' was particularly true in her case. "But I never said it was an unwanted disruption," he continued
"Interesting, since that's usually what a disruption is – not exactly something coveted."
"Aa, I guess you're just a special case then."
Shortly after, they departed, Sakura going home remorse ridden that she had been spending all of her time with Kakashi when she had been anticipating her parents return so eagerly before. Upon arrival, she found her father writing up a report in his study, and her mother careening around the kitchen busily.
"I heard Naruto-kun and Sasuke-kun are going to be participating in the next jounin exam," she said giving her daughter a smile. "I'm sure they'll have no problem in passing."
Sakura mutely nodded in acquiescence, curious as to how her mother already knew.
"So how about you, dear? Have you considered the jounin exam?"
If her mother truly knew her, she would have known the answer to be no.
"Kaka-sensei doesn't think I'm ready for it yet."
Taka, stopping her preparation for supper, smiled understandingly and stepped forward, enveloping her discontented daughter and kissing the top of her cherry head. "Don't worry, your time will come," she said, smoothing back Sakura's hair, resting her cheek on top. "You just have to be patient till that time comes."
Burying her face into her mother's shirt, she suppressed the surge of emotion that swept forward, bewildered why she suddenly felt so saddened by Taka's comforting words and warm embrace. Really, it should have been cathartic instead.
Thursday, Sakura walked into her house at 5:13pm, looking a little worse for wear than ordinary. Explanation: Kakashi and his barbaric boot camp drills. Apparently he was making up for lost time spent on fables and comfortable silence the day before. She supposed it was a good thing though; it wouldn't be beneficial to either of them if their new rapport caused distractions, although she wouldn't have really minded either.
Eight thirty-three pm, Sasuke appeared in her window, rapping softly on the glass and startling Sakura into attentiveness. Opening her window, he clambered on in, imitating a panther with his cat-like grace and pure black garb.
"Is something wrong?" It wasn't everyday Sasuke appeared in her window-way – that was more of a Naruto trait.
He assuaged her fear with a simple, "No" as he looked around her room with a Charlatan interest.
Feeling rather surly at the moment, Sakura figured this was a good enough time to ask as any. "Why didn't you tell me you and Naruto were considering the jounin exam?"
She was decidedly put-out about the whole thing, he noted. "So you found out," he remarked blandly, quietly humored as he spotted a romance novel resting on her night table. "A new hobby of yours?" he ribbed, gesturing towards the book.
Sakura pointedly ignored him. "You're not answering the question."
He spared her a glance this time, endless pools of black boring into her and rooting her to the spot. Amusement suddenly danced across his eyes as he gave a simple shrug, sitting down and leaning back on his elbows on her bed.
The way he was acting so cavalier in her personal space, grated on her nerves.
"I suppose we didn't tell you because we knew you would be upset."
Irked, she crossed her arms, weight resting to one side of her leg. "So you thought it would be better to keep it from me?"
"Seemed like a good idea at the time, ya."
The more he spoke, the more exacerbated the situation became, forcing Sakura's mood to dour even more. Clomping towards him, she grabbed his arm and hauled him off her bed, shoving his resisting weight back outside her window – or at least that's what she tried to do.
"Get out," she grumbled, grunting as his larger frame refused to move.
He glimpsed over his shoulder, mass leaning back into her shove and seeing her face steaming righteous fury.
"God you're annoying," she panted, tired of trying to move his inflexible person.
He smirked. "I thought that was my line."
Completely put-off by his high-handed attitude, she made a sound resembling disgust and strode towards her bedroom door. Sasuke could stay in her room for all she cared; she just needed to get away from him lest she did something drastic. Good thing the guy was gorgeous, since he certainly didn't have anything else going for him in the personality department.
That was her last thought before she suddenly found her torso smashed against her door, Sasuke's body restraining her on the other side. She snarled in aggravation as her hands were held fast behind her back – again!
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" she snapped, attempting to stomp on his foot only to have him move it in time. She froze as she felt him bury his nose in her hair, hearing him take a deep inhale against her ear.
"You smell like Kakashi. Why?"
She tensed unwillingly, her mind racing a mile a minute. Did he know? Had he seen them? Suddenly she didn't care about him pinning her against the door anymore.
"I was training with him you idiot."
He didn't respond; face still nuzzled against the crook of her ear. Revolted by his gauche methods of garnering information, Sakura snapped her head back – connecting with chin, mouth, nose – she wasn't quite sure, but knew she had damaged something by the sound of pain he emitted, and released her hands to stumble back a couple feet.
Turning on a fulcrum she glared; green eyes dark and menacing as she observed blood trickle from his nose in sick satisfaction.
Unperturbed by the bloody nose, he simply wiped it off with the cuff of his sleeve, appraising the girl in front of him before a sly smile glided into place. He gave her a nod, as if acknowledging something for the first time, then left without a word.
The next day, Friday, she hadn't spoken a word to Kakashi about Sasuke's little surprise visit, unsure of how he would react to such a thing. Their controversial affair had only lasted a week today, and already Sasuke was showing signs of suspicion. She concluded that if he brought up another remark concerning her and Kakashi, she would tell the older man and they would have to be even extra cautious.
Although Kakashi had never informed her if he had told anyone, and hadn't verbally banned her from telling others either – there was an unspoken agreement that this 'thing' they had between them – whatever it may be – was not to be mentioned to anyone, under no circumstances.
She supposed it was exciting yet slightly stressful as well, doing something covert and taboo, but she couldn't help but wonder if the taxing part of their affair would later overshadow the thrilling part in the future.
Later that day when she met up with Ino and Tenten, it had proved interesting and also a smidgen informative.
"All right, what happened? I haven't even been gone for a week and you're positively glowing!"
"Huh? Glowing?" was Sakura's intelligent reply, discretely giving herself a once over.
"Yes! You look like a walking glow stick for crying out loud!"
Tenten had only enthusiastically bobbed her head up and down in agreement.
She feigned innocence. "I don't know what you're talking about. Nothing has happened since you left."
Of course they hadn't believed her, but then again, she really hadn't expected them too.
Managing to skillfully dodge question after question, and giving her acting talents a good work out, she nimbly slipped by her gregarious friends who were, per usual, chatting up the opposite sex. Now at home, standing in front of her mirror, she tried to see what her friends had seen; nope, no inner luminosity whatsoever. She wondered if they had a sixth sense with everything male related.
The sound of her front door opening and closing distracted her from her own appraisal, making her instinctively smile and walk down to greet her parents.
"Dad," she started, following him into his study, "I was wondering if you wanted to supervise my training tomorrow after I finish with Kaka-sensei?" The truth of the matter was that more training made her want to scream and yank out all her hair, but she couldn't cogitate a better reason that her father would agree upon.
She often made such decisions and sacrifices in order to have a little father-daughter time that she always heard about but never had the opportunity to experience. Ino was a prime example who liked to boast about the latest ability her father had taught her – the bragging grating on Sakura's nerves. Somewhere deep inside her logical self she knew the blonde never meant to swank and that she only viewed it as such because Ino tirelessly talked about things which Sakura had always surreptitiously sought out. But still…
"I'm sorry Sakura, but your mother and I are leaving tomorrow on a mission," he said, leafing through some papers on his desk, back facing her as she lingered in the doorway.
Her happy demeanor wavered. "The both of you? Again?"
"You know we're often paired together on the same mission, Sakura. We're one o–"
"–of the most efficient pairings Konoha has to offer because you have been training and working together since the academy," she said, finishing his sentence for him. She had heard those words so many times that they sprouted from her like second nature now.
Sighing, she tried to keep her disappointment hidden and to a minimum.
"Precisely," he replied, unfazed by her interruption. "I'm glad you understand."
Only she didn't, despite what he thought. He strode by her carrying a few papers, giving her a fleeting glance before proceeding upstairs.
She didn't know why, but she continued to follow him. "How long will you be gone?" she asked meekly, her steps overheard by his thumping ones.
"Two months."
"Oh…"
She lingered in her parent's doorway, already seeing her mother preparing for whatever journey they had to embark on tomorrow.
"What's the mission?"
Kisho gave her a cautioned glare, telling her she shouldn't be asking – of course Taka never felt the same reservation as her husband.
"Just that there's been recent skirmishes along the boundary of Grass and Leaf. We're being sent there as border reinforcements for the time being, making sure it doesn't escalate further into the Fire Country."
"Taka, you shouldn't be telling her our mission outline," he said, acrimony undertone tangible.
Sakura shrank back, cowed by her father's caustic tone, but Taka simply smiled and brushed off her husband's anger.
It was interesting though, that they were being sent to the border. Shikamaru and two other chuunins arrived approximately two weeks prior from what seemed to have been the same mission, although theirs had only entailed information retrieval and confirming rumors or not. It seemed Shikamaru and his team had been misinformed, since her parents were being sent there tomorrow. The fact that Shikamaru – Konoha's number one genius, had been incorrect left a disturbing knot of discomfort in Sakura's belly.
"Do you have to go? I mean…did Hokage-sama request your presence?"
"We offered to go, dear," Taka said, placing a few necessities in her travel bag.
Sakura looked at them incredulously. "You offered? But why? You've only been home for a week and you're already leaving for another mission?"
Kisho and Taka simultaneously looked over at their daughter's sudden outcry; Taka offering a sad smile, semi-understanding, and Kisho simply schooling annoyance.
"What's this about, Sakura?"
She cowered slightly, brows knit in a beleaguered fashion, hating the displeased tone in her father's voice.
"It's just so…sudden," she replied, eyes focused on her fidgety hands, knowing she couldn't say what she really meant.
"You're a shinobi Sakura," Kisho stated firmly, attention focused on his own packing. "You should be proud that your parents are serving Konoha."
"I am proud!" Sakura countered, earning her a glare. "I just wish you wouldn't serve Konoha so frequently." Was it really so horrible that she wanted to spend time with her family? She didn't think so, but the demeanor her parents were sporting made her believe otherwise.
"You're selfish, Sakura," he said flatly and so confidently that she instantly believed him.
"Kisho…" Taka said, not reprimanding but sadly, making Sakura wonder if her mother agreed.
"This isn't about you Sakura, you should know that," he said, sifting through his drawers, back facing his broken daughter. "Konoha will always come first – before you – before me – before your mother. If Konoha needs me, I will never hesitate in serving." He stalled his movements to regard his daughter gravely, ignoring her distraught expression. "It would do well if you learned to accept that."
Sakura said nothing, only giving an obedient nod while hatred swam in her eyes; willing the tightness in her throat and the stinging behind her lids to disappear. She surveyed her parents looking at her stunned, making her blink and clear away the loathing that had surfaced.But it was pointless – they had already seen it. Shocked and dismayed by her sudden abhorrence towards her parents, she quietly snuck away to the refuge of her room.
.
He tensed, a presence jolting him awake. Reaching under his pillow, he pulled out a kunai that he always kept close to hand by force of habit and instinct. He slipped from his bed soundlessly, moving along the floorboards with a panther-like stealth. Kunai poised and ready, he glided open his bedroom door, seeing a shadow moving through his living room, slithering back and forth.
Masking his chakra and creeping along the side of his hallway, he stopped. The sound of gentle footsteps reached his ears, listening to the quiet patter of the person approaching before walking away again, repeating the cycle tirelessly. He lingered against the side of the wall, waiting till the person reached the nearest point of distance.
With a silent preternatural speed, he seized the trespasser and brutally forced them to the ground, his knee effectively pinning them down and the tip of his kunai pressing dangerously into the back of their neck.
"Kakashi, you're hurting me."
The familiar voice shattered his killing instinct, making him immediately let go and turn the intruder over, barely seeing pink hair through the dark. "Jesus Sakura, I could have killed you!"
He stood up stiffly, running a hand through his sleep tousled hair before taking one deep infuriated breath in. "It's three in the morning Sakura, what do you think you're doing sneaking into my place at this hour?"
She pulled herself up timidly, hugging herself uncomfortably with her head bowed awkwardly. The thought of him being angry at her for coming here, had never crossed her mind. Now that she thought about it, she wasn't quite sure why she had come. When she had crept outside her bedroom window, her feet had steered her on autopilot and stopped her outside of Kakashi's apartment.
"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to wake you," she whispered, although the truth of the matter was that she did want to see him, but inhibition had made her pace indecisively in his living room instead. Turning to leave, she didn't want to give him the opportunity to tell her to go. It hurt too much to hear someone vocally tell you they didn't want you around.
"What do you think you're doing?"
He sounded annoyed, making her insides cringe and her defenses rise. "I'm leaving."
"You sneak into my place, wake me up, then simply think you can leave?"
She stood a few feet away with her back turned to him, her arms still wrapped protectively around her elfin frame with her mouth refusing to give a reply.
"You know what, fine! If you don't want to tell me then don't. I'll keep my end of the promise," he said unusually bitter, striding away down the hall and shutting his door more fiercely than necessary.
He lay in bed on his side rigidly, breathing even and quiet and not wanting to miss a beat in her movements. It had been five minutes, and her presence still lingered out by his front door irresolutely. He was positive she hadn't even moved since he had left. Tensing, he held his breath, sensing her aura approaching him slowly – he, uncertain and strangely anxious and hopeful as to what she would do.
He felt her gradually yet steadily near his bedroom door, making his heart palpitate a little louder than ordinary. She was on the other side of his door now, pausing, making him aware of how hesitant she was. It was almost a whole minute before he heard the knob turn, the almost imperceptible creak of his bedroom door slowly being pushed open, followed by her presence slipping in and closing the door behind her.
He didn't move, didn't blink, didn't make a sound as she quietly remained hovering by his door. She had never been in his room before, a part of the tour he had purposefully left out; not daring the chance of having her think he was insinuating how fast their relationship should be progressing. Things with Sakura had to be slow, delicate and prudent. He was more aware of her age than anybody else, and thankfully he was also a patient man who knew how to wait for the good things in life, and Sakura, well she was definitely one of those good things.
Sensing her move, he felt the bottom of his mattress dip with her weight and continue dipping as she crawled towards the head of his bed. He watched her slow and cautious motions, her uncertainty and timorous conduct as lurid as a siren. Streams of flower-pink hair hung around her dipped head like a curtain, shielding her face from his view.
He wasn't sure what to expect – what to prepare for, as she moved ever closer. She didn't say a thing or make a single sound as she laid on her side, her chest pressing against his bare one, one arm feeling its way around his naked back to hold him more tightly against her.
When she buried her face against the hollow of his neck, he felt her tears; and when he snaked his arm around her shoulders, he felt them slightly trembling.
Neither one said a thing as he kissed the top of her head and nuzzled his nose in the thick of her hair. His other hand reached to cup the back of her neck, holding her ferociously close against him and refusing to let her go.
She never noticed he wasn't wearing his mask.
.
When Naruto had knocked on the Haruno residence's door, with his feet shuffling back and forth in nervous anticipation, he hadn't expected and nearly jumped back in reflex by the sight of Kisho.
"Naruto," Kisho nodded in acknowledgement, "how can I help you?"
Naruto looked up at the huge brunette, always finding it difficult to tear his eyes away from the deep scar that marred the man's face.
"Hi Kisho-san, is Sakura-chan home?" The instinctual reaction to be polite always arose when Naruto was faced with Kisho. Not even Ibiki caused such an effect on him.
Green eyes tilted perniciously. "My daughter isn't home at the moment. I'm assuming she is training."
It was 10:00am, and checking their usual training field had been Naruto's first priority when he arrived back from his mission, but strangely enough no pink or silver had been there. If Kisho had convinced himself his daughter was training, well Naruto wasn't going to try and persuade him differently.
"All right, Kisho-san. I'll go check the fields then," he lied, turning away.
"Naruto," Kisho resounded, making the blond stop in stride. "You will pass the jounin exam."
He didn't know if it was meant as a compliment or a warning by Kisho's profound tone and cold-set eyes, so he simply gave a brief nod and walked away.
.
She was awake, and had been for the last few minutes, yet she tenaciously kept her eyes closed, refusing to greet the afternoon sun that was warming her back. She was so disgustingly comfy that no coercing could draw her away. Her cocoon of perpetual bliss was just too enticing to be rivaled against.
The bed was simply too comfy, the pillows aroma just terribly addicting, the spring sun too soothing – all making her want to never move again. She felt like she was on a beach, envisioning the sound of water lapping at the shoreline, the sway of the palm trees in the breeze, the gorgeous bright sun tanning her back.
Suddenly there was something tracing the length of her arm, annoying as it tickled her skin with its path, and further drawing her awake when she had been desperately clinging onto unconsciousness.
She mumbled something – what? She wasn't quite sure but it effectively stopped whatever it was that had been touching her – at least for a little while till she felt it again, this time in her hair.
Thoroughly irritated by having her beach fantasy interrupted, she snapped open sleep fogged eyes and squinted through the sunlight.
Her vision was partially blurred and blinded by natural light, but nevertheless she still saw somebody near her, causing her to shriek and jerk back, gaining her a groan and a bump on the head when she fell half off the bed, her legs still tangled in the sheets above her.
Smooth Sakura…very smooth…
She heard laughter – familiar laughter, and used her hand to shadow the light before blinking rapidly a few times to clear away the haze.
"Are you all right?"
"Kakashi…?"
He cocked his brow, wicked amusement playing underneath his mask, as if silently asking 'who did you expect?'. His mask was on, also a pair of loose black drawstring pants, however that was all his attire consisted of, making her voice a little mantra inside her head to remain calm and mature when all she wanted to do was gape like a fish.
Sheepishly, she untangled the sheets from around her legs, avoiding his stare as he watched her every move. Standing there awkwardly, unsure of whether to leave or crawl back into his bed, she did a quick scan of his room; beige walls which matched his black and taupe bedding, which matched his dresser and night tables, which co-mingled with everything in the room except her.
"Something wrong?"
Something always seemed to be wrong with her, she noticed, making her wonder when he was going to get tired of asking the same question.
"I don't like your room," she said uncommonly blunt.
"Ohh…?" he drawled, humoured instead of insulted. "And why's that?"
She watched him languidly shuffle from his bed, black pants hanging loosely around his waist as he sauntered towards her casually. Her cheeks heated unwillingly, hating her juvenile self that would blush just because he was shirtless. She forced herself not to gawk, not to notice the tone of his skin; the definition of his muscles; the scars with all their stories; so instead quickly paced towards one of his windows and peered outside with a false interest.
"Because I don't match."
He laughed, deep and beautifully carefree as he stepped behind her, placing his hands (which seemed enormously large) on her dainty shoulders.
"How so?"
She was leaning back into him now, his hands still securely perched, his chin resting lightly on the cushion of her hair.
"Everything in your room matches – all earth tones and blacks. Even you match with your hair and clothes."
"So does the rest of my place yet you said you were fond of it."
"I said I like how clean and organized it is, not the choice in colour."
"So you don't like the colour beige or black? And here I thought black was universally appealing."
"First of all, black is a shade and not a colour, and second of all, it's not so much the colours that bother me but what it signifies."
"Ohh?" He burred, subconsciously stroking the pad of his thumb along the arch in her shoulder. "And what do you think it symbolizes?"
"That I don't belong – that I shouldn't be here," and continued to sigh dejectedly. She felt him chuckle again, loving the way it shuddered into her body.
"Funny, 'cause I can't imagine you belonging anywhere else."
She paused, leaning further back into him. "You certainly didn't give that impression last night," she said, trying to keep the hurt from her voice, recalling how mad he had been at her. Even if it had been justifiable, it still stung.
"Sakura, you need to understand that I wasn't angry that you came here last night; I was angry that I could have seriously hurt you. Next time just give me a warning."
She sighed; she hadn't viewed it like that. "I'm sorry."
For everything…
He stroked her cheek. "It doesn't matter anymore. I'm just glad you came back."
She had hadn't she? She hadn't run away to cower in a corner where she was always so determined to cope with her dilemma's on her own, the dilemma's which ate her alive and made her suffer in her own personal Purgatory. She had stayed, gathered up her mettle and faith to seek him out and trust him when she was vulnerable the most.
And just as she should've expected, he had been disturbingly understanding; holding her without her having to tell him, whispering sweet reassuring nothings into her hair, letting her tears soak into his chest. It felt good to be taken care of – to be treated as if she might be broken – having him pander her childlike need for reassurance, because it's what her shameful side always wanted; always screaming in the background when she was trying to prove to the world that she was grown up.
"Will you tell me though what was upsetting you?"
His question roused her memory, eyes the size of little full moons. "My parents! What time is it?"
"Almost noon."
She groaned, sinking to her knees, utterly crestfallen. "They're gone…I never got the chance to apologize," she whispered, stating it more as a confirmation for herself than informational purposes for Kakashi.
Kakashi, not fully understanding but knowing something wasn't right, lifted her up and sat her on his lap, waiting and hoping she would amplify.
"They were sent on another mission," she whispered listlessly, eyes glazed with emotion, "and they actually volunteered to go!" she went on still unbelievably flabbergasted, eyes moist with tears and silently beseeching him to make things better – to lift this ache from her chest. "Why? What is so wrong with staying in Konoha?"
Kakashi shook his head, a sad sigh leaving his lips. "I've had the privilege of working with your parents before, and though I might not know them well, I know enough to know that they are loyal and faithful to Konoha; that they believe serving our village is top priority over everything else. It is because they love Konoha, that they leave her."
She frowned, hating the truth to his words. It was just as Kisho had told her last night; it wasn't about her – it never would be, but she couldn't help but wish it was – just for a day, just to know what it was like to be the most valued thing in her parents life. She brooded if Kakashi would do the same, abandon her for the sake of the village.
"He said I was selfish," she whispered suddenly, the statement still nipping at her insides.
"Aa," he breathed, hugging her from behind. "I'm afraid it's something you're unable to control."
"What?" She peered over her shoulder to look at him incredulously, feeling the familiar throb of tears behind her eyes. "You think I'm selfish as well?"
"All love is selfish, Sakura. It's something we as people can't control."
She dipped her head down, brows creased together in thought. "But I–"
"Being selfish isn't always a bad thing, mind you. Everybody deserves a little spoil." He tilted her chin up, permitting her to see the merriment in his disposition. "Don't you agree?"
She couldn't help but submit a small smile. A happy Kakashi was almost as contagious as a serious one.
"Does that mean we're being self-centered by being together?"
"Aa," he whispered.
"But is it okay for me to be this selfish?"
"Only with me."
.
She wondered if they knew; if they could sense the shift of air around them; could read the veiled emotion in their eyes. For someone so pragmatic, she knew her notions were impractical, but nevertheless they haunted her just the same.
They were simply walking, normally if not more distant than usual from each other; him with his pocketed hands and slouched gait, she with her posture rigidly stiff and shifty eyes. He had told her twice already to relax, amused by her incessant worrying, and she would, at least for a couple minutes till her overactive imagination re-emerged.
She had done this dozens of times with him, she rationalized, just walking through Konoha to wherever they intended, with nobody ever giving them a second glance to speculate their agenda.
"If you don't calm down Sakura, people will start wondering."
He was right; he was always right.
"Hey Sakura," she heard, turning to the right where the voice was coming from. "Naruto's been looking for you," Shikamaru said, slinking past a few villagers to walk beside her. He gave a respective nod towards Kakashi who simply returned the gesture.
That's right, he came back from his mission today.
"And I heard your parents were sent to the border as well," he continued, although there was an inflection to his tone that meant more than he was saying.
"Which I don't understand why. Weren't you assigned there a couple weeks ago?"
He gave a nod. "There were rumours that something fishy was happening along the border, so Hokage-sama sent me and a couple others to substantiate the buzz."
"But you didn't find anything."
"That's true, we didn't. Everything seemed perfectly normal…"
Her expression twisted, knowing he was holding something back. "But…?"
"But even though things appeared ordinary enough, there was something that just wasn't quite right; the way the Grass villagers would look at each other; converse with this disquieting politeness. Not even the children acted unruly."
"Maybe they were just well behaved," Sakura suggested lightly.
Shikamaru shook his head, eyes dazed in front of him. "No, it was something different, as if they were on guard for something – afraid almost..." He said; voice fading near the end as his mind delved deeper into the matter. "But I couldn't report or confirm any hidden designs based on the villagers eyes and tone or that their conduct was suspiciously well behaved."
"But obviously your hunch was right since a half dozen shinobi were sent there," Kakashi said, making both chuunins turn to regard him. "A ninja should never ignore his gut instinct – it's what keeps us alive ninety percent of the time."
Shikamaru nodded in acquiescence to Kakashi's words. "Ya, there's something just not quite right happening in the Grass Village. Almost a foreboding, if you may – umm…I mean," he stuttered, taking note of Sakura's distraught expression. "I'm sure I'm just overreacting. It's probably just some petty misunderstanding."
Sakura shook her head in dissent, giving him a weak smile. "It's alright Shikamaru – you don't need to lie for my reassurance."
He nodded, partially uncomfortable but mostly in guilt. "Well I got to get going before Ino kills me for being late. Talk to you later, Sakura – Kakashi-san," he said, nodding to each one before walking away.
"Don't worry, Sakura," Kakashi said monotone as soon as Shikamaru left, "have faith in your parents."
She listened to his words but said nothing in return. They walked for a few minutes in the silence and night, passing through the market and park towards their glade. It was darker here than in the village, a couple distant street lamps which shone their yellow incandescent lights between the park benches. Grasshoppers sang; crickets chirped; leaves rustled in the trees around them. The night was warm, but not comforting.
"Do we have to train?"
"Yes."
She sighed; he was in one of his obstinate moods again. Squinting her eyes, she tried to concentrate on the ground below her as he led her through the woods to their dale.
"It's too dark to train," she groused.
He gave her a sideways glance. "That's the point." He stopped in the largest opening, making sure no trees or boulders were within a fifty foot radius.
"What's that?" she asked, a smidgen suspicious as he pulled something from his pocket.
"A blindfold. We're going to train your senses."
Sounded frustrating, but she let him tie the black cloth around her eyes anyway. "Do you not trust me to keep my eyes closed?" she teased.
"Yes, but accidents happen."
She rolled her eyes underneath the cloth – doing it primarily because she knew she could get away with it.
"So how does this work?"
"I want you to get a series of shuriken ready, and I'm going to circle around you. When you think you know where I am, throw a shuriken at me."
She fretted. "What if I hurt you?" Then realized what she had said. "Right, dumb question," and unsnapped her weapons pouch, pulling out the shiny stars.
"Whenever you're ready."
She nodded and stood stock still, listening and forcing her senses to expand and reach out around her. It was more windy here than between the streets in Konoha – no buildings to obstruct the breeze. The long grass tickled her naked calves, and swooshed around her noisily.
There!
She threw a star, only to hear, "You're thirty-five degrees off, Sakura."
Damn, she had been so sure…
She listened again, hearing nothing but the rustle of grass around her. Her forehead creased in a stressed fashion before she quickly threw a star behind her.
"You're still off." The voice came from somewhere in front of her.
She ground her teeth, agitated with her incompetence. Naruto and Sasuke probably would have succeeded on their first try, she thought bitterly then abruptly shook her head. Negative thinking would only distract her; she needed to focus!
"You can do better than this Sakura," Kakashi whispered in her ear, making her rapidly swing around only to be met with empty air.
She threw a star out of desperation, praying she would be granted with some rare luck and have it head in his general direction.
"You're still off," he whispered, nuzzling her hair with his nose then quickly disappeared as she sliced her shuriken behind her.
"You're patronizing me!" she accused heatedly, then felt him brush his hand against her cheek. "Stop it!"
He laughed, fanning her inner flame madly.
Fuming and about to erupt, she used her senses frantically to search out her derider. After a few moments she felt a tingling sensation to her left, making her brows frown in wonder. It was moving, slowly, coming around behind her and closing in. She let it, feeling an edgy anxiety as it hovered behind her.
"You're behind me aren't you? I can feel it."
She jumped diminutively as he grasped her shoulders gently. "Very good," he breathed into the core of her ear. "Now do it again," and he was gone.
She pursed her lips in attentiveness, although she was eminently aware of the tingling sensation hurriedly moving around her now. It would fade, almost to the point of being none existent, then suddenly careen and become overwhelming if it got too near.
His movements were too erratic and too quick, twisting her bearing to one of aggravation. Unexpectedly he slowed, and she quickly whipped a shuriken before the opportunity was missed. A few seconds passed, and hearing nothing from Kakashi, she peeled off the blindfold.
Blinking a few times she saw his silhouette twenty feet in front of her with her shuriken gleaming in the moonlight around his index finger.
"You did well, and you'll do better. The more you practice the farther your senses will expand. Right now it's at about a thirty foot radius but with training you'll reach towards a kilometer or more."
"Then how is it that shinobi's are killed or wounded? If they can sense their attacker from that far away, wouldn't they be prepared?"
"Because," he began, picking up her stray stars, "you aren't taking into account if their chakra's are cloaked or not. You know that tingling sensation you felt? That was my chakra you were detecting, but if I were to mask it, you wouldn't have sensed anything. Also if the situation is dire, shinobi's usually don't have the luxury of time to pause and focus all of their concentration on chakra detection."
She mulled over his statement. "Well what about you sensei; how far can you detect?"
"Hmm…" he tapped his chin in thought. "About two miles."
"Ehh!"
It was interesting how he never failed to amaze her.
.
AN: Umm ya, that part you just read, about the chakra and detection thing…completely made up! Whenever something sounds kinda fishy, you'll know it's my unconvincing mind splurging out these ideas :D
To answer a couple questions:
1. Will she ever see his face? Yes, she will see his face eventually, before the second arc for sure.
2. Will I up the rating and will there be smut? Yes I will up the rating to 'M' soon enough, and about the smut? lol I haven't really decided, but I'm probably like 80 percent sure, but if there is going to be, it won't be till wayyyyyyyyyyyyyyy into the second arc 'cause I'm constantly reminding myself that she's 16, his student, a virgin whose never had a bf and I think things need to be taken slowly with her. But that's not to say there won't be a little citrus action along the way. Build up people. Build up! lol :P
Sorry, just gotta comment to a couple people.
Tami – I've read up to the most recent manga scanlations, and finally decided to watch the anime from 127-133 the last few days, but until I watched the anime, I didn't even remember poor little Sasuke trying to be acknowledged by his father. It's so true when I re-read my last chapter its like looking at a pink Sasuke lol what an image that brings.
Nimacu – when I read your review all I could picture was Sakura having a gun, and I just kept picturing her threatening to shoot Naruto every time he annoyed her lol My conclusion: Sakura owning a gun sounds dangerous! And I'm glad you liked the fact of them just hanging out…I like that aspect too :D
And thanks to everybody, as always, for reviewing and commenting. I love reading what you guys have to say, and if you ever have a question, leave an email and I'll get back to ya.
One more thing. I'm going away to Hong Kong for two and a half weeks on Sunday, so my next update will be…oh, I don't know…far away? lol so sorry bout that :(
Take care everyone,
–Eris