ACT II
CUT TO:
INT. CONVENTION CENTER—MAIN FLOOR
Tudgeman is explaining the finer points of "Star Wars" to Miranda, whose eyes are glazing over.
LARRY
--So it's a person's midichlorian count that determines how strong they are in the Force.
MIRANDA
(dully)
Fascinating.
Lizzie can't help but feel sorry for her friend.
LIZZIE
(to Gordo)
Look at her Gordo. I can't help but feel sorry.
GORDO
She's not helping herself any. These conventions can be pretty cool. She should at least try to get into it. Like you.
LIZZIE
(surprised)
Like me? What're you talking about?
Gordo merely points to a 'Frodo Lives' pin that 'somehow' has found its way into Lizzie's hand. Hastily, she shoves it into a pocket.
LIZZIE
I, uh, was just supporting British Literature, that's all.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
Yeah, that's the ticket!
GORDO
Uh huh.
ANIMATED LIZZIE
Besides, can I help it that Elijah Wood is a total hottie?
LARRY
(to Miranda)
Oooh, they're about to give a lightsaber demonstration! Come on!
Tudgeman pulls her along.
CUT TO:
INT. CONVENTION CENTER—ENTRANCE
Kate has made her way to the convention. She stands at the doors, looking around for Matt and Lanny. She spots two Ewoks walking by.
KATE
Ah ha!
She lunges and grabs the heads off the two costumes—to reveal two very annoyed midgets.
KATE
(mortified)
Uh, s—sorry. I was looking for—sorry.
She takes off looking for her two wards.
CUT TO:
INT. CONVENTION CENTER—MAIN FLOOR
In her search for Matt and Lanny, Kate bumps into Lizzie and Gordo.
LIZZIE
(surprised)
Kate. What're you doing here?
KATE
Um, looking for someone…?
GORDO
Aren't you supposed to be watching Matt and Lanny?
KATE
(embarrassed)
That's who I'm looking for…
LIZZIE
What!
KATE
You see, I was helping them with their merit badge thingee…
(off look)
The bottom line is that they're here somewhere. And if I don't find them your parents will totally flip; and a thing like this could totally kill my reputation as a babysitter.
GORDO
Didn't you catch a house on fire once?
DIGITAL STILL:
Kate's fiery babysitting job as was it was shown in the episode entitled "Misadventures in Babysitting".
BACK TO SCENE
KATE
It was only the kitchen.
(beat)
Besides, that's not the point. Will you guys please help me? I know you're supposed to be on a date and all, but please…?
ANIMATED LIZZIE
You know, there was a time when I'd have enjoyed seeing Kate squirm. But now…
LIZZIE
(gesturing)
Sure Kate. Gordo, you take that direction. Kate, that one. I'll go this way.
They split off to search.
CUT TO:
INT. CONVENTION CENTER
Larry and Miranda are still 'taking in the sights'. Suddenly Tudgeman feels the 'call of nature'.
LARRY
Oh! I'll be right back my precious; have to use the 'little elves room'.
Tudgeman scoots off to the loo, leaving Miranda alone in a 'sea of geekdom'.
Enter Matt and Lanny enjoying the festivities. Miranda spots them.
MIRANDA
Hey, aren't you supposed be at home?
MATT
(quickly)
Ah, we're just here for a school project. Uh, research…
MIRANDA
(not caring)
Whatever.
Miranda's glum.
MATT
(looking over the wares)
They've got some pretty cool stuff here.
MIRANDA
If by 'cool' you mean lame. Then yeah, they've got loads of cool stuff…
MATT
I don't know. Everybody seems to be having fun. That's cool.
MIRANDA
I guess.
MATT
And believe me, it's not like this stuff is easy to get a hang of.
MIRANDA
(muttering)
Why would anyone want to…
MATT
(not hearing)
Then there's just so much of it. Comics, books, movies, t.v. shows. They're all different, but they get the same kind of fans.
Lanny nods his agreement.
MATT (CON'T.)
I mean, sure all this stuff is cool and all, but the neat thing is that it gives you something to talk to other people about. Comradely!
He and Lanny share a manly embrace to emphasize the point. During all of this Miranda's been listening increasingly hard. She's starting to get the concept that the experience of fandom is bigger than any particular franchise or intellectual property. In short, fandom is about the fans more than the things that they are fans of.
Miranda starts to look around with new eyes. People are having fun, enjoying one another's company. And there's nothing 'dweebish' about that.
At this point enter Lizzie, Gordo, and Kate—they've found the two wayward wards.
LIZZIE
(to Matt and Lanny)
There you are you little creeps! What're you doing here?
MIRANDA
(reflective)
They were just helping me realize something that I'd forgotten.
(beat)
That having fun is always cool. No matter where you're having it at. Or for that matter, what you're doing.
Miranda laughs as a group of costumed fans pass by while engaged in a mock duel.
KATE
That's great. But I've got to get these two back home A.S.A.P.
Kate grabs Matt and Lanny each by one ear and marches them out—much to the rest of the group's amusement.
Reenter Tudgeman. Miranda cozies up to him.
MIRANDA
So, Larry, tell me all about this Dark Sid guy…
LARRY
It's Darth Sidious…
(playfully)
You are such a dweeb…
CUT TO:
INT. MCGUIRE HOME—EVENING—MUCH LATER
Sam and Jo have just gotten home from a night on the town.
JO
Thanks again Kate for agreeing to watch Matt and Lanny. They can be quite a handful…
KATE
No problem Mrs. McGuire. They were great.
SAM
Speaking of which, where are they?
KATE
Oh, they're tied up right now…
CUT TO:
INT. MCGUIRE HOME—MATT'S ROOM
We see that Matt and Lanny are both bound hand and foot in the very ropes that they had used on Kate earlier.
FADE OUT:
END OF EPISODE