The few days with Severus flew by, much too quickly for both.

Hermione was amazed at how comfortable she'd been with him in his chambers. Not once was he short with her or act as if he didn't want her there. She'd remained at his side, in one form or another, either sitting quietly beside him as he graded essays and tests or working beside him brewing potions. She'd never enjoyed anyone's company the way she enjoyed his. Falling asleep and waking up in his arms had taken her to a new level of happiness. Even sex with him had evolved into something strangely beautiful. Their first few encounters had been very unemotional and highly erotic as Severus had controlled everything, showing her a world she didn't know existed. Now there was obvious emotion in their actions and gestures. She just felt the difference, even though she couldn't really explain it. His touch was more gentle, his eyes were softer, his kisses longer…just different.

As she laid in her own bed, wondering if she'd be able to fall asleep without him beside her, surprised at how quickly she'd grown accustomed to being with him through the night, Hermione remembered the words she'd heard in her mind. Did she want to hear him say I love you? Is that why she said it inside her mind? Apparently she did want to hear it from him otherwise she wouldn't have imagined him saying it to her then. And the kicker was, she immediately thought it back with no hesitation. Did she love him? She'd never been in love before and couldn't help but question herself. Was she sure it wasn't some kind of infatuation? Or some curiosity because he was the first man she felt this strongly for? Or possibly because there was some attraction to the secrecy of their meetings, having to sneak around?

She turned over and clutched her pillow, immediately missing his scent that she had looked forward to each night. No it had to be love. Not the extreme 'let's get married' love…but love nonetheless. After all, she loved her parents differently than she loved her friends so why couldn't she love him? She genuinely cared about him and he for her. They'd both proven it. She didn't know what would happen after graduation but found it difficult to picture herself without him after this time with him.

After graduation, she thought. We haven't even discussed anything resembling a relationship. Why should I think there would be anything after graduation, regardless of what we feel? There's so much I want to do, so much I want to see, and I know he'll remain here at Hogwarts where he has been for years now. Neither one of us have the personality to compromise what we want.

Hermione pushed the thoughts out of her mind as best she could. No use worrying about unknowns now. She had the last half of her seventh year to finish and was sure it would be the hardest yet with her exit exams. Instead of worrying about a future that would take care of itself, she decided to enjoy each day as it came. It was really all she could do anyway.

Severus was standing at the window, staring out over the grounds but not really seeing anything. All he saw was her. Sitting by him in the classroom. Standing by him in the lab. Lying beside him in his bed. Underneath him when their bodies joined in the wee hours of the morning. Smiling at him. Laughing with him. Moaning because of him. Concentrating as they worked on a potion or when they were quiet reading. Just her. Everywhere.

But she wasn't there, having returned back to her dormitory so they wouldn't be discovered as students were returning from holiday. They were taking enough of a chance as it was. He hoped Albus' drastic decision to expel Draco took care of that side of the problem. Now they just needed to get through the rest of the year and then could go from there.

Go from there, he thought. And where exactly are we going? She's a brilliant young woman with her life ahead of her. She could go anywhere; do anything with that mind of hers. I will be staying at Hogwarts. Why should I think there would be anything after graduation? What would we do, get married? He chuckled at the thought of standing at the end of an aisle, watching Hermione glide down in a white dress. I hardly think that's probable.

He shook his head. Why was he even thinking about it? Anything could happen between now and graduation. She could decide this was a mistake and never talk to him again. She could find someone her own age and forget about him. She told you she loved you, he reminded himself. Yes but she didn't know that was me. She was probably just responding in the moment.

The fact remained however. He loved her.

And for someone who prided himself on the fact he could instill fear in others, he thought it odd that now someone was instilling fear in him.

"Hermione!" Harry exclaimed as they met in the common room Sunday evening. "We missed you! But Scotland was amazing! Wait till I show you pictures!" He'd gone with Ron, Ginny and their parents during holiday to visit cousins of Arthur's. He'd been near giddy about going, as the Dursleys had never taken him anywhere.

"I can't wait to hear all about it," Hermione said as they sat in front of the crackling fire.

"You should have seen the castles," Ron continued. "Bloody old they were but wonderful. We thought we saw ghosts in one."

"We?" Ginny asked with a laugh. "Was that before or after you went running down the hall screaming?"

"Oh come off it," Ron said, turning slightly pink. "Did we miss anything here?"

Hermione bit her lip. She'd been wondering how to answer the question she knew she'd be asked. Certainly they would find out why Draco had been expelled, even if no one else did, and she knew they'd be furious if she didn't tell them first as they were her best friends and had been for years. If the tables were turned, she knew she'd be upset. She couldn't tell them about Severus though, choosing to not share that part of her holiday with them.

"Well," she began, glancing at each one of them. "Something did happen. But before I tell you, you need to know I'm perfectly all right."

Ginny frowned. "Were you hurt?" she asked, expression serious.

"Who was he? I'll kill him," Ron instantly said, face slightly red.

"Shh," Harry told him. "Go on, Hermione."

"Ginny knows this but you two don't," she said to Harry and Ron. "Draco and I were…together a couple times."

Both sat in silence for a moment.

"Together as in…" Harry started, concern in his voice.

"You slept with that Slytherin prick?" Ron asked hotly, eyes wide in alarm.

"Ronald," Ginny hissed under her breath, shooting him a look.

Hermione sighed. "Yes," she answered, thinking how stupid it sounded now. "Everyone else was doing it. I just wanted it out of the way, you know? And he hadn't given me a hard time in a couple years. He's been a little preoccupied."

"That's an understatement," Ron said sarcastically, finding that he felt almost hurt. "Why him though?"

"I thought he would be a sure thing," she said with a slight laugh. "And that he'd be on to the next and leave me alone. Only he didn't. He kept trying to…get me back to his room and I started telling him no. Then he cornered me in the hall and tried to…force himself on me."

"Did you tell someone?" Ginny asked.

"Sev…Snape rounded the corner and grabbed him off of me," she answered, quickly correcting herself. "Of course, Draco was pissed and went running down the hall, threatening that we'd hear from his father."

"I'm not liking the sound of this," Harry said shaking his head.

"Lucius showed up here a few days ago," Hermione continued. "And while he was chatting with Snape about what happened, Draco left a fake note saying I was leaving for holiday and then knocked me out with a spell. They took me back to their house and kept me for four days."

"Oh my god," Ginny said, eyes wide.

"They what?" Ron shrieked. "I'll kill them both!"

"Ron, really," Harry said exasperated, rolling his eyes. "What happened?"

"Draco wanted his way," Hermione explained. "He wanted me and when I started saying no, he got pissed. Then when Snape threw him off me, he went running to daddy and they came up with this little scheme to lock me away."

"Lock you away?" Ron repeated. "What did they do to you?"

Hermione bit her lip again. "Well," she began. "Draco got what he wanted…a few times…" She paused. "As did his father," she added quietly.

"What?" Harry exclaimed, his tone now meeting Ron's. "Lucius?"

"How awful!" Ginny said, eyes sad.

Ron was so mad, his face bright red, no words were possible.

"Did you tell Dumbledore?" Harry asked.

"Snape was sent by him to check things out because of the note and the fact I'd not told anyone I was leaving and because I had been involved with Draco," she explained. "And he found out they were lying so I was returned quicker than what was planned."

"Are they going to Azkaban?" Ginny asked, hoping.

"No," Hermione answered. "Dumbledore expelled Draco."

Ron gasped, as Harry looked confused. "That's it?" he asked.

"Snape said it was worse than Azkaban," Hermione told them.

Finding his voice, Ron said, "It is worse. There's only been one other expelled from Hogwarts and…well…it's bad. Wow."

"It shames the entire family," Ginny explained. "Especially in this case with the Malfoys being so prominent. It's like being blacklisted, you know?"

"But you're okay then?" Harry asked, wishing he'd been here, thinking he could have done something. "They didn't…hurt you?"

"I'm okay," she said, forcing a smile. "Really." She chose to leave out the part about Draco wanting to get her pregnant as that would mean revealing her abortion from earlier in the year which would also mean explaining the protection spell Snape put over her that she hadn't known about which would then mean explaining why he was concerned enough for her to do that.

Ginny hugged Hermione. "I'm sorry," she said. "That must have been so awful. If you need to talk about any of it later, you know I'll listen."

"Thank you," she said. "I…uh…talked with Snape quite a bit actually."

Ginny raised her eyebrow, understanding what Hermione couldn't say out loud.

"To Snape?" Ron asked. "Why him? That would be like talking to a wall!"

She shook her head. "He's very easy to talk to," she said. "It made me feel better regardless."

"That's all that counts," Harry said. "I'm really sorry you had to go through that."

"Me too," Ron added.

"Thank you," she said. "But it's over and done. Go get your pictures. I want to hear all about Scotland."

When Harry and Ron reluctantly disappeared up the staircase, Ginny asked, "So Severus helped you again?"

"Yeah."

"Do you care about him?"

Hermione's eyes met Ginny's, knowing she couldn't lie to her. "Yeah," she answered. "I do."

Ginny smiled. "Apparently he cares about you too," she said. "I'm glad he was here for you."

"Me too," Hermione said quietly as the guys returned with an armful of mementos and picture books.

The first week of classes was torture for Hermione as she found she couldn't concentrate on anything. Harry and Ron were still giving her sympathetic looks, which she kept telling them to stop doing, while Ginny would give her a knowing wink periodically. In classes, her mind would wander back to days previous when she stayed with Severus. She pictured him when he first woke up, hair tousled more than usual, voice raspy, wrapped up in his sheets, yawning and stretching. She thought about how they would sit together in his classroom, her reading and him grading his tests, never having to say a word to each other. She remembered helping him with potions in his lab, amazed at how easily they worked together, preparing and blending ingredients, almost anticipating each other's moves. She replayed the passionate and tender moments between them, still amazed at his gentleness with her.

"Miss Granger," Severus said, forcing an annoyed tone. "Care to share with the class where your mind has wandered off to?"

Fighting a blush, Hermione looked up at him during Friday's class, knowing he knew exactly where her mind was. "Um…no…sorry Professor," she said quietly, looking back down at her parchment.

"A moment after class if you will," he sneered, happy he could still do it convincingly. "Maybe some extra rolls of parchment will keep you focused."

When class ended, Harry and Ron gathered their books. "See you back in the common room," Harry told her.

"Tell me if he gives you a hard time," Ron said protectively as they left the classroom with the other students.

Both waited until the door closed behind the last student.

"So you wanted to see me?" Hermione asked with a smile, approaching his desk.

He smiled too. "See you, touch you, kiss you," he answered, eyebrow raised. "Tell me when to stop."

"What if I don't want you to stop?" she asked, standing beside his chair.

He reached for her hands and pulled her into his lap, pointing his wand at the door to cast a locking spell. "Then you might be late getting back to your friends," he told her, nuzzling her neck, inhaling her scent, realizing how much he'd missed her all week.

"They'll live," she said, closing her eyes and allowing goosebumps to dance over her body as his lips left her neck and seized her lips in a quick kiss.

"Do you remember the way to my secret room?" he purred.

"I think so," she answered. "Why?"

"I think we should start meeting there," he told her. "It might look suspicious if you're always near the dungeons. If we meet there, no one will see us."

"Okay," she agreed. "Can we meet there tonight?"

"I was hoping," he answered, holding her still when she tried to get up from his lap. "And where are you going?"

"Well we're meeting tonight right?"

"Yes."

"Then I was going to leave and see you tonight," she explained with a smirk, teasing him.

"I don't think you need to leave so soon," he said quietly, pulling her close. "Unless you really want to."

Feeling his lips softly caress her neck again, she melted into his hold, fingers slipping through his silky hair. "Um…okay," she whispered quite distracted. "I'll stay."

The news of Draco's being expelled was the hot topic for about a month and then slowly faded away. The Daily Prophet ran one vague article and rumors flew consequently. Thankfully only a select few ever knew the real reason, Hermione hoping she'd never see either one of them again, as she was quite sure that they would have a vendetta against her.

Winter soon disappeared from Hogwarts as icicles fell from their hanging spots and snow melted from the grounds. Instead flowers of every color were blooming bright and birds were singing happily. Springtime had arrived.

New romances were blossoming as well, but Severus and Hermione were oblivious to them as they met every Friday and Saturday at his secret chamber, the one he used during the summer. Both Harry and Ron were preoccupied with interests of their own and didn't notice how much time Hermione spent out of the common room.

Severus managed somehow to keep his snarling way about him, still barking at students who just refused to listen to his instruction. But deep inside, his heart was lighter than it had ever been. Hermione's steps were lighter too. Since spending time with Severus, Hogwarts seemed a different place. Even her studies, which were usually almost effortless, now seemed to float by with barely a notice.

"So Hermione," Ginny asked one night, as they got ready for bed. "What are you going to do about the dance?"

The brush sliding through her brown hair stopped. "Dance?" she repeated, eyes wide.

"Seventh years have a big dance," she said, sitting Indian style on her bed. "The Graduation Formal? You remember when Fred and George went."

Hermione had forgotten all about it. "That's right," she said, memories coming back to her. "They spiked the punch and everyone started hiccupping bubbles."

Both girls laughed, remembering when the twins had told the story.

"Everyone pairs up though," Ginny said. "It's almost a requirement. You know how Dumbledore is."

"Pairs up?" Hermione asked. "That's silly. It couldn't be a requirement otherwise people would end up with people they didn't like."

"If people don't pair up on their own," Ginny continued. "I've heard he does it for them." She paused to lower her voice. "What would you do about…him?"

"I don't know," Hermione answered with a shrug. "I haven't thought about it really. Guess I'll just ask someone then."

"Will he get jealous, you think?"

"Jealous?" Hermione repeated amused. "I highly doubt that. He understands the position we're in." Why should he be jealous anyway? They still hadn't discussed anything about a relationship. "When is this dance?" she asked.

"About a month away," Ginny answered.

Hermione decided to mention it to Severus.

As Hermione lay in Severus' arms a few days later, she said, "You know that ball is coming up soon."

"I know," he said with little enthusiasm, wishing they didn't have it and that he didn't have to attend.

"I've heard everyone is supposed to pair up," she continued.

"Yes, one of Dumbledore's ways I'm afraid," Severus said wearily.

"So that means I have to find a date," she said. "And it obviously can't be you." She sat up and turned to face him.

"Yes I suppose you will," he agreed. "Or he will do it for you."

Hermione sat for a moment. "The thought of being in someone else's arms…" she trailed off, curious as to what he would say.

"Certainly you can handle it for one night," he said simply, sitting up as well. "It's not a wedding."

Hermione bit her lip. She was used to his sarcasm, knowing he thought the dance was pointless, but she realized she wanted him to be jealous, or at least have some reaction to her being with someone else. She decided to drop the topic, as she felt rather silly with her thoughts, telling herself she was overreacting.

A couple weeks later, strange things began happening between Severus and Hermione. She began to feel like he was ignoring her in class, trying to tell herself it was just his way of handling their situation. But later, when they were alone, he didn't seem as attentive as he'd always been. He was a little distant and explained it was because of one thing or another when she asked about it. She found herself closing up from him consequently and losing patience, storming into the common room more than once, face red in frustration, ignoring whoever was in there and heading straight to bed.

When she told him they couldn't meet the Friday night before the dance because she needed to help a Hufflepuff with his Advanced Arithmancy project, she knew something was amiss inside her. Severus had said he understood and that he'd hope to see her the following night, not really sounding like he would miss her.

Hermione didn't have to meet with Richard that night but had suggested it on purpose to have an excuse not to spend time with Severus. As she worked with Richard in the quiet library, thinking how they'd always gotten along so well, she found herself asking him if he'd be her date for the dance.

"Nothing serious," she clarified, flashing her smile. "But it would be nice to go with you."

Richard smiled. "That sounds great," he told her. "I was thinking about asking you anyway. You just had more nerve than me."

Hermione smiled. At least that was done. Richard was a good guy so she was pleased with herself.

All the seventh years were talking about the dance that was only days away. The guys were less impressed while the girls were near giddy about who was going with who and what they would wear. Hermione participated in conversations but didn't really care, beginning to wonder about herself as her reactions were vastly different than her girlfriends'. Why did she not get into this like the others did? She honestly didn't care what dress she would wear or how her hair would be styled, much more concerned about what was happening between her and Severus and why he was closing up from her.

Friday night finally arrived. The Great Hall was emptied of its usual long rows of tables, having only three over to the side filled with punch and sugary sweet delights. Filch was assigned to punch bowl duty to make sure there was no incident like the year before. Everyone had donned their fanciest robes and dresses, all colors visible in the hall instead of the usual black.

Harry had asked Cho, who seemed to have stars in their eyes when they looked at each other, while Ron had asked Jill, a girl from Ravenclaw he could barely keep his hands off of.

"Hermione you look great," Harry greeted her. "Hi Richard."

"Hi Harry. Hi Cho," he greeted, taking a sip of his drink and looking around. "Hey, look at ol' Snape. Looks happy as punch, doesn't he?"

All four turned to see Severus lurking in a dark corner, arms crossed, lips pursed in annoyance, looking almost like a mad statue of himself. It made Hermione want to run over and throw her arms around him but knew that was impossible. She thought his robe looked like crushed velvet and found herself longing to feel it against her skin.

"Have you seen Ron yet?" Harry asked, interrupting her thoughts

Just then they spotted Professor McGonagall bringing in two students, all three of them red in the face.

Harry laughed. "Looks like Ron was trying to start early," he said as Ron and Jill began walking over to them.

"Can't you wait?" Hermione teased when they were within earshot.

"Funny you are," he said. "McGonagall was pretty mad with us."

Professor Dumbledore clapped his hands to get everyone's attention. "Welcome to the Annual Graduation Formal!" he announced as everyone applauded. "There is unlimited food and drink available. But be aware that if you try to venture too far away from the hall, you will be brought back promptly. Dance and be merry!"

More applause as the music began to play. Professor Dumbledore led Professor McGonagall to the dance floor first, which seemed to loosen everyone up a bit, and soon most everyone was dancing.

The three couples of Harry and Cho, Ron and Jill and Richard and Hermione stayed close throughout the evening dancing, taking a break for sweets and punch, and then dancing again.

Hermione would periodically look over at Severus, who never moved from his spot. Professor Dumbledore brought him punch and Professor McGonagall tried to get him to dance but he refused. Hermione was hoping to catch his eye but it looked as if he were purposely not looking her direction. She didn't understand and found she was quite upset with him. What had been his problem lately anyway? Well, if that's how he wanted it to be, so be it.

The last song of the evening was a long slow one. Hermione purposely steered her and Richard to make sure Severus could see them. He and Filch were the only ones in the hall not dancing and she tried to tell herself she didn't care. But she wanted Severus to see her with someone else since he was being so difficult.

Richard had been attentive to Hermione all night, holding her hand or putting his arm around her shoulders, and she liked it. She knew she couldn't be serious with him but it made for a very nice evening. So much so that when he kissed her lips lightly as they danced close, she didn't pull away.

The formal ended at one AM as everyone was exhausted from hours of dancing. As the three couples left the hall with the others to walk back to their dormitories, Hermione couldn't find Severus anywhere. Damn him, she thought. What the hell is wrong with him?

Harry and Ron's goodbyes to Cho and Jill lasted much longer than Hermione's to Richard.

"Thank you," she told him. "I had a great time."

"Me too," Richard said. "Maybe we can go to Hogsmeade together sometime."

Hermione smiled and kissed his cheek. "That would be fun," she said. "Goodnight Richard."

As she lay in bed, wishing she could sleep but feeling wide awake, her mind wandered to Severus again. He was hurting her and she didn't know what to do. Was that it? Had he just decided they were no more? They'd been so close and happy. Things seemed to change overnight. She'd have to talk to him again. This would drive her absolutely mad.

Hermione stayed in her dormitory most of the weekend and was happy when Monday arrived so she could return to her classes, purposely staying away from the dungeons until Friday for potions class.

She couldn't remember the last time she'd seen him in such a mood. He was yelling at everyone but her it seemed, half the class ending up with detentions and the other half with extra assignments.

Hermione took her time cleaning up, telling Ron and Harry she'd see them later, and noticed Severus disappeared into his chamber with no glance her direction. She was determined to talk to him and placed a locking spell on the door after the last student left.

"Severus," she called out as she walked into his chamber. He exited the bathroom wiping his face with a small towel.

"Why are you here?" he asked curtly.

She fell silent for a moment, quite shocked at his question. "Why am I here?" she repeated. "Why do you think I'm here?"

"Miss Granger, I do not have time for these games," he said, sending the towel back into the bathroom with his wand. "Please don't answer my question with a question."

Anger was slowly building inside Hermione. "I'm here to talk to you," she told him. 'And to put it bluntly for you, to find out what bug crawled up your ass."

"Such eloquence," he scoffed at her expression, eyebrows joining in a frown. "What do you need to talk about?"

She crossed her arms. "Where is the Severus that helped me through one of the worst times in my life?" she asked. "Where is the Severus that was worried about me when I was kidnapped?" She raised her voice. "And where is the Severus I've spent months with?"

He didn't speak for a moment. "He wised up," he answered, voice cold as ice.

"Are you saying that was all a mistake?" she asked, voice cracking slightly, knowing tears weren't far behind. "Has everything with me been…a lie?"

Brushing past her, heading for the classroom, he said, "Call it what you will."

She followed him out as he sat at his desk. "I don't believe you," she said. "If there are any lies, it's what you're saying to me now."

He said nothing and began grading tests from an earlier class.

"Don't ignore me!" she yelled, standing in front of his desk.

"Get out of my classroom!" he yelled back, standing up, eyes blazing with rage. "Now!"

Out of both shock and fear, Hermione turned and ran from the classroom, heading for her dormitory, tears spilling down her face.

How could he be so cruel? How could he turn against her and ignore what they meant to each other? What had happened? Had Dumbledore said something? Had Lucius threatened him?

Changing her mind, Hermione headed for Dumbledore's office. When she approached the gargoyle, she realized she didn't know the password. "Emergency!" she finally exclaimed and the statue moved.

"Come in Miss Granger," Albus said when he heard the soft knock.

She stepped in and closed the door behind her. "I need to talk to you," she said, wiping tears. "It's…personal."

Albus smiled warmly. "I can see you're terribly upset," he said. "Please sit my dear."

Hermione sat in the large leather chair, still sniffing. "He's changed," she said, eyes pleading with him to help her. "I don't understand what's happened. He won't talk to me."

"I see," Albus said, not surprised. "Nothing specific happened?"

"No," she answered. "He began to distance himself from me about a month ago and it seems to have gotten worse."

"Do you love him?" Albus asked simply.

Her eyes met his, always amazed at their gentleness and depth of knowledge. "Well I've never loved like this before," she answered. "But I think I do."

He smiled. "Miss Granger," he began. "I've known Severus for many years. And never have I seen him as happy as with you. Rarely have I ever seen him happy at all. But you bring out a side to him that I longed to see but assumed I never would." He paused. "He loves you, more than you know."

She was confused. "Then why is he treating me so bad?" she asked.

"Severus has not had an easy life," Albus explained. "He has been used, lied to and manipulated by so many. It's his defense to hurt others before they can hurt him. You're in pretty deep and it's terrifying him." He stood up and sat on the edge of his desk, closer to her. "Has he ever mentioned Lilianna?"

Hermione shook her head.

"Please don't repeat this," Albus began. "But Lilianna was a woman he loved years ago. They began a relationship during her final year as well. Things were very good until the rise of Voldemort. He was a spy at that point in his life. Voldemort however noticed a change in Severus. I will not share the grim details with you but Voldemort eventually put an Imperius curse on him, controlling his actions, making him bring her to a death eater rally and then forced him to sacrifice her as an act of loyalty, all under Voldemort's power and not his own."

"Oh my god," she gasped.

"As you can imagine," Albus continued. "Severus was completely devastated. I'm afraid those feelings of guilt and fear are resurfacing."

"But those days are over," she pointed out. "We don't have to worry anymore."

"You were kidnapped," Albus said. "That's all it took. It frightened him that much."

Hermione was quiet for a moment. "So what am I supposed to do?" she asked.

"Continue to try to talk to him," he told her. "You will probably have to endure more anger and many harsh words but he needs to know your love is deep and feel secure that you won't just walk away from him."

"I understand," Hermione said nodding. "I basically need to be as stubborn as him."

"Indeed," Albus said with a smile. "Do not let him frighten you because he will certainly try."

"Okay," she said quietly, standing up, feeling a little better. "Thank you for your help." She paused, biting her lip. "Professor, do you think we're wrong for…being together?"

"Are you hurting each other?" he asked gently.

"No."

"Are you using your ages to manipulate the other in any way?"

"No."

"Do you genuinely care for each other?"

"Yes."

"Then how could it be wrong?"

Hermione smiled. "Thank you," she said quietly and left his office.

Okay...if I'm remembering COS correctly, I think Hagrid was expelled...it's been awhile since I read it...but we're pretending that part didn't exist...my literary liberty...