Chapter Ten: To keep her honor...
Do what you must, but always remember where you come from.
Respect others as you respect yourself, that is a strong virtue.
Honor your family, but honor yourself.
---Lady Tamaida of Ninequor to her daughter on when she left for training.
Teirra woke in almost an instant. She didn't know what brought her out of her sleep so suddenly, other than the fact that she had become aware that she was asleep. Pushing herself up, Teirra recognized the clearing that had been the Rider's camp. Now it was filled with men, some wounded, other's anxious. Confusion swept her.
"Finally. Don't you ever do what you did again, or I will tell Father and force him to punish you in any way he knows how." Taex shoved a bowl of warm stew in her direction.
"How long this time?" She asked, gratefully accepting her meal. Teirra was starving, after all.
"A day and mid-morning. You missed a lot with your little venture in the woods." Taex sat himself beside her, folding his long legs awkwardly underneath him.
"Why didn't you wake me earlier?" She sipped at the stew, watching him.
"I tried, once at supper. You swung your arm and nearly hit me." Taex smiled a little in amusement. "Much like Father does when he's tired."
Teirra smiled a little. It felt good to be sitting with her brother and talking to him. She hated how their lives so frequently tore them apart. She missed being a sister to her brother. It was such a basic concept.
She remembered suddenly about poor Domitran and Alan and looked with alarm at her brother. "What of Sir Alan and Sir Domitran? Are they alright? The Lioness will never forgive me. I let them down and allowed them to get hurt. I knew something wasn't right. I should have stopped them or done something more."
"Stop," her brother ordered in all the authority an elder brother had to use. "The healers say Sir Domitran will be quite alright after a few more days of rest. After Sir Alan got a scolding from his mother, and that was a sight to see, the fury of a lioness." He shook his head, then continued. "Well, he'll survive at least. Sir Alan took the full responsibility for your venture. He made sure you, at least, had your honor."
Teirra nodded sadly. "I am sorry." She was more sorry than any words could express. "What happened here?"
Taex looked around, becoming serious, as serious as he had been back in Corus. "I don't like gossip flying about, but you deserve to know I suppose. It was a trap. Somehow they knew you'd go into the woods and somehow they knew you'd call for help. Prancer came running into the camp, crazy-like, interrupting the Lioness and Commander Opion. It was such a sight. He made them follow him into the woods. They took a few men, but where ambushed there. I suspect not far from you and your friends.
"An army moved in between, cutting off the commanders from their army. The Count gathered as many of the villagers into the gates as he could and helped organize a defense. The Own was split, some trapped on one side, others on the opposite. They had us pinned. A few of the Own escaped into the castle and are helping hold it from there. The rest escaped and regrouped here. We were careless, over-confident and stupid." Taex told her quietly.
Teirra frowned as deeply as she could. She knew who was behind all this mess and she hated him for it. Shoving her bowl at her brother, she threw off her blankets and jumped to her feet. Immediately, she began to look for her pack, her weapons and more arrows. She should have killed him that night when she had the chance. Then so many would not be dead, wounded or about to be. Her reputation was little compared to that.
She stalked down a pathway, her brother close behind her, calling for her to stop. She wouldn't listen. Teirra wasn't going to be swayed this time. Along the way, she found Iris and stopped infront of her. "Where are my weapons?"
"Teirra?" Iris turned to her curiously.
"Where!" She nearly shouted. She hated to be so rude, but time was drifting away, precious time. She could have prevented this.
"There, but horse-girl-" Iris began, but Teirra was already headed away and in the direction Iris had pointed out.
Now she had both Taex and Iris following behind her quick pace. She pushed past idle men and to her pack without so much as a glance. Forget her honor, right now. Teirra was fairly certain that if she just killed Grufford, she could end all this mess. She didn't know how he had escaped, but he had, she felt it.
She scrambled through her pack, discarding anything other than her weapons. A few things flew to hit Alan, who had come in concern much like her other companions. Teirra gathered up her sword and sword belt, strapping it to herself and bent to shove a few knives into that belt around her waist. She bent once more to retrieve her quiver and bow, then turned to face Alan. "Where can I get more arrows?"
"Teirra-" Alan began slowly, reaching to grab her shoulders. He was speaking to her like she was some crazed idiot. She did not like it.
"Where!" She demanded once more. Teirra was becoming frustrated and was losing her patience.
"Stop this!" Alan demanded, grabbing her shoulders firmly. She stepped away, trying to break his hold, but he wouldn't let her. "What do you think you are going to do? Go on some revenge trip. I won't let you, nor will your brother, or your commander. I want to end this as much as you, but a single person isn't going to stop it. It wasn't your mistake."
Teirra narrowed her eyes at him. For once in her life, she forgot how much higher in rank the man before her was. "You don't understand," she growled. "I have to. It's my fault this is happening."
"Lady Teirra, no it is not." The knight pronounced each word carefully, making sure she heard him.
"You don't understand. And I'm not an idiot." She told him again, harder this time.
Alan stepped back, releasing her and folded his arm across his chest, clearly put off. "Then explain it to me, to us."
Teirra looked around her. By now Jak and Wyhon had joined her brother and Iris in watching her. She didn't like being the center of such a watchful crowd. She sighed, her anger beginning to fade. "I can't."
Alan frowned and grabbed her arm, pulling her out of earshot of the others. "Then tell me, or so help me, I will find a post and tie you to it."
Teirra looked into those hard, green eyes and shuttered. She knew he would and no one would stop him, certainly not Taex or Iris, if anything, they would help him with the ropes. She bit her lip. "I could have ended this. I was only a few steps from him. I could have reached out and just killed him. None of this would have happened."
"What are you talking about? Who are you talking about?" He watched her intently.
Shame brought her eyes downward, forcing her to look up through her eyelashes. "I knew he was trouble, this Grufford, or Master Hale. I thought he killed my mother. I wanted him dead, Sir Alan, so dead."
"So you went to kill him, but you didn't. Teirra, by not killing him, you didn't set this into motion. If not Grufford, it would have been someone else. Going to get yourself killed, isn't going to solve it." Alan told her gently.
"I have to end this. You have to understand that I have to do this." Teirra pleaded with him. If he didn't understand, she didn't know who would. Certainly not Taex, she knew all to well. Honor drove him as much as it drove her.
Alan watched her silently, his face hard and unreadable. Teirra couldn't help but wonder what he was thinking and praying that he would see her point. It may not be honorable, but she had to do it. Grufford could not be allowed to survive this and gain more troops to his cause because he had "defeated" the Lioness and her troops.
Finally, he drew a breathe and let it out slowly. "They're mounting an attack mid-afternoon today. My mother's leading it. I won't be here to watch over Domitran. You will. I am commanding you to watch over him and if you leave camp, Lady Teirra, I will not shield you from my mother."
"What? Why won't you help me? You have to see..." She looked at him confused. Had she heard him right?
"I do see, but I can see the consequences much more clearly than you. I'm not going to let you do this. Domitran will keep you occupied." A hint of amusement drifted into his eyes.
Teirra's face fell considerably. She wanted to help, she wanted to end all this suffering. "I don't do well with blood." She muttered weakly.
"You will do fine. Domitran is in that tent there." He motioned to a tent a few feet to her left.
Teirra nodded dutifully. "Of course, sir. Thank you, sir."
"Please, drop the 'Sir.' It makes me sound old." Alan smiled over his shoulder at her slightly as he started to leave..
"Of course, sir." Teirra felt defeated and helpless.
As he left, Taex, Iris, Wyhon and Jak came up beside her. Taex patted her shoulder slightly, not knowing the full extent of why she was so upset. He knew would, she decided. She would never tell him.
Teirra shrugged off her brother's comfort as gently as she could. She was far too disappointed to deal with concern at this moment. She would apologize later, but not now. Instead she just headed for Domitran's tent and slipped in quietly.
"Thank everything you're not Alan," Domitran greeted her. He was propped up so he could be sitting. He looked almost as good as new. It must kill him just as much to be sitting in camp while the others fought.
Teirra offered him a sad smile, the best she could manage. She bowed slightly to him. "Sir Domitran, I'm sorry you were injured."
The big knight smiled it off. "Another story for the ladies to woo over."
Teirra only nodded. The knight's humor couldn't lift her poor mood. She was hurt that Alan wouldn't see her side and help her. She thought he would understand.
"What troubles good Lady Teirra, Queen's Rider?" He asked dramatically.
"You could be a Player, Sir Domitran with all your dramatics and quips." She remarked.
"A Knight Player indeed." Domitran laughed lightly. "I have to do something to keep that smile on your face."
Teirra came to sit beside him. She bent to retrieve a waterskin and offered it to him.
He pushed it aside. "I don't need tending. Alan is overcautious. No doubt he ordered you here."
Teirra looked down. "For a much different reason, I'm afraid."
"He's overcautious and protective. It stems from the fact that he can't always protect his mother. He stifles his friends instead." Domitran replied good heartedly.
"But I'm not his friend. The likes of me cannot be with the likes of you or Sir Alan." Teirra mumbled.
A knight laughed. "I've never heard of such a timid Rider. Most of you are Players in the making. Of course you are counted among us as a friend." He shook his head. "Silly girl."
The comment brought a flush to her cheeks. She had never hoped for such friends. It made the earlier hurt a little more bareable.
The commotion outside made them look to the tent's entrance. Those who would accompany the Lioness' campaign were gathering to leave. They were quick to prepare as a good unit and within moments the sounds were drifting away from the camp. It was quick and efficient, as they had all trained to be.
"Help me up." Domitran shifted.
"What?" Teirra looked at him, confused.
"Help me up," he repeated. "I'm not going to sit here. We're going to get into the castle and find out how that Grufford man escaped."
Teirra's heart leaped. "We? That got us in trouble last time."
"We won't be near danger, just solving a mystery. And without Alan's watchful eyes." Domitran struggled up.
Teirra went to help him. It was sound logic in any matter. They could probably make it back before the battle was over.
Author's note: Ugh, this chapter wasn't that great, so please forgive me. Nor am I good at getting my characters out of the mess I create for them. I only hope I can do it here. Now comes the complicated part... I also worry about my portrayal of Alan, but I don't know of any real cannon material to back up a personality, so...