Harry and Ron's fantastic idea
A/N: What happens in this chapter is actually based on a true story about a man who tried to commit suicide but only just. It should have happened in book five when everyone wanted to kill Umbridge.
Disclaimers: J.K Rowling owns the characters and the method of killing Umbridge belongs to a dead man who has tested it and proved it very efficient.
Scene: Harry and Ron are in the Gryffindor common room, for the sake of this story they have no homework and are looking bored. Ron suddenly has an idea.
Ron: Hey, I know! Let's kill Umbridge!
Harry: yeah! Great idea!
Ron; Let's poison her!
Harry: No, hang her!
Ron: Set her on fire!
Harry: Blast her brains out!
Ron: All great ideas but which one would hurt most?
Hermione: walks over to them You do realise you could do them all, and a few other things.
Harry & Ron: We could?
Hermione: Yeah listen, and she tells them her plan.
Scene: All the D.A are on one of those cliff things by the lake hiding behind bushes. Fred and George are still there at this point and they have set off a firework near the edge of the cliff thing. Umbridge comes running.
Umbridge: Oh no! not another! She runs up to the firework that explodes in her face. Then Hermione waves her wand and a noose appears from no-where and gets itself round Umbridges neck. Then Ginny waves her wand and Umbridge is pelted with bat bogies (the suicidal person didn't do that by the way, I made it up) Luna runs up to Umbridge and forces her to drink poison. Then Ron sets her on fire and Harry pushes her off the cliff with his wand so that she hangs while on fire and poisoned, then just to finish it off harry pulls out a hand gun and aims to blast her brains out. Unfortunately he misses. The bullet cuts the rope and Umbridge falls into the water that puts out the fire immediately and the shock causes her to vomit out the poison. The bat bogies that didn't get burnt have by this time drowned (I mean gone soggy and sunk)
Harry: damn, she's still alive after all that.
Umbridge: oh help! Save me! Save me!
Filch: Oh no! my girlfriend's drowning in the lake only I cant help because I'm a big fat squib!
Snape: but I can. Levitates her out of the lake and drops her on the ground.
Umbridge: Professor snape! Oh thank you!
Snape: don't thank me, I only saved you 'cause you owe me ten galleons for that poison.
Umbridge: What? Then mimics the suicidal man and dies from hypothermia. A cheer goes up from the crowd who saw her die apart from Filch who jumps in the lake and drowns so he can be with his one true love. The End
A/N: I loved writing that! It is just so funny! Sorry if I haven't put your song in this chapter but I will next time. Promise. If you reviewed me one anyway you can have some nice chocolate fondue (marshmallows and fruit covered in melted chocolate) to say sorry. Hope you enjoyed reading what I've written though, please review and tell me!