Picking up the Pieces

Chapter Five

'Lieutenant j.g. Austin, your line of questioning is unreasonable.' The judge said in his chambers harshly to Meg while Commander Lindsey smirked. Meg looked down, embarrassed. Her first case at JAG in years without a senior officer and she had been sandbagged by the egotistical Ted Lindsey.

'Sorry your honour,' Meg was submissive. Around Harm, Mac and AJ she was rarely ever seen with her eyes down and a 'Don't-give-me-that-crap' look combined with her 'butter-wouldn't-melt-in-my-mouth' look, but around judges, other senior officers and Lindsey, she was as submissive, as shy and sweet as anything.

'I advise that your Commanding Officer remove you from the case or assign you a co-counsel.'

'Yes sir,'

'I'd be happy to report this incident to Admiral Chegwidden,' Lindsey volunteered.

'Thank you Commander Lindsey. Court will remain in recess until this is sorted out.'

Meg stalked up to Lindsey.

'How dare you! You know for a fact I was within my rights asking those questions!'

'For someone who still can't remember the few years she was absent from JAG for…'

AJ came up and grabbed Meg as she went to hit Lindsey.

'Meg, is Commander Lindsey giving you trouble?'

'He's trying to destroy my career!' Meg said, wrenching free of his grasp.

'Meg, calm down…Commander Lindsey, my office now. You too Meg,'

'Admiral, her questions to my witness this morning were unreasonable and unrelated to the case.'

'You're lying; you mean they were unrelated to your case but not mine!'

Lindsey gave Meg his 'I'm-superior-to-you' look.

Meg cowered under his glance. Spineless as he was, up until now he had never made her feel so weak.

'If you two…Lindsey, if you can't give up trying to sandbag everything Lieutenant Austin does…'

'She deserved it,'

'ENOUGH! Why the hell is everyone out to destroy Lieutenant Austin's career?'

'She doesn't…'

'If you say she doesn't belong in the navy then I will hit you Lindsey,' AJ threatened.

Lindsey looked very nervous.

'I uh I'm sorry sir, but she does not deserve…'

'She has a name. And Meg has worked very hard for this. I don't understand why…You…You have had a hand in her not progressing further than Lieutenant junior grade.'

'Someone had to. She is incompetent, the first time she was working with Rabb, when he was a Lieutenant, she undid her harness trying to get onto a submarine.'

'She does not need some egotistical SOB from the past…'

'No wonder this office needs to be broken up – it's full of…'

Meg ran out before Lindsey could finish. Mac caught her as she passed and pulled her to the side.

'What happened?' Mac's chocolate brown eyes were full of concern as Meg looked away nervously.

'I hate Commander Lindsey,'

'Don't we all? What has he done to you?'

Meg was silent, and Mac kept pushing at it.

'Meg,'

'He's trying to remove me from the case I'm working on. I was an idiot to think I could do it alone,'

Mac folded her arms. 'Come with me; show me what you've got so far.'

As Meg walked with Mac, a memory flashed in her mind.

Lindsey in the door of her office at Computer Weapons, just watching her.

'What can I do for you sir?'

'Come now Lieutenant, I know that you're the best here, I need your assistance on a case.'

Meg looked up from her work. 'You sure that's not code for "I want to have a torrid affair with you and then when the SecNav finds out, it'll be your neck not mine."?' Meg asked coldly. She hadn't trusted Lindsey for a while.

'Why would you say that?'

'Because, I know you too well,' Meg replied as he came in, closer to her. He was practically on top of her, breathing down her neck. He put his hand towards her chest and went in to kiss her.

'Commander Lindsey, what are you doing?' Meg pulled away and got up, jumping to the other side of her desk in fright.

'Is there a problem, Meg?'

'Yes, I just realized that the senior officer in this room is a cheater,'

She shook herself out the memory as Mac sat opposite her and took the file case file from Meg.

'It looks like your evidence and arguments are legitimate. You surely had a right to ask these questions…there's something else, isn't there?'

'Lindsey tried to make a move on me…the memory just came back.'

Mac saw the hatred in Meg's eyes.

'Don't you have any good memories of the time you weren't at JAG?'

'I don't know Mac! I want to know why I keep remembering the bad stuff!'

Mac sighed. 'Meg, do you…'

'I want to do this alone,'

AJ came in. 'Meg,'

'Sir, I'm sorry I ran out! I didn't mean to!'

'I'm not here to reprimand you…Lindsey's won through Meg. I have to assign you a senior officer, I'm sorry.'

'I'm quite capable…'

'I know what you are capable of Meg.' AJ said apologetically.

'Sir, I'll help her,' Mac said. 'Her arguments are fine; I've looked over the whole case file.'

'Thank you Colonel.' AJ left and Meg put her head in her hands.

'Yet again I'm made to feel…'

'You're not incompetent Meg!' Mac said, annoyed with Meg constantly falling to the ground when Lindsey was involved. Harm came in then.

'I just heard about Lindsey's latest vendetta. Everything okay Meg?'

Meg turned to face him.

'Yes, it is Harm.'

Harm looked at her.

'You're hiding something,'

Meg stared back at him with her innocent cornflower blue eyes that just said "Don't push me Harm."

Harm saw the look in her eyes and knew she didn't want to be pushed into anything, or talk right now.

'All right,' Harm left the office.

'Meg, you should have told him,'

'He'll just get overprotective Mac,'

Mac saw what Meg was trying to say and sighed. She understood completely how her friend was feeling, because Harm could be so pushy and protective at the best of times - even when he wasn't needed.

'I know,'

That night Meg lapsed into more memories of the years she had lost after her accident. She felt at ease with this one, not as rigid or afraid, but it was still a painful memory.

Meg rode her horse slowly through the woods with her mother and brother on their horses beside her. The sun was setting and a cool wind came up as they rode.

'Meg,' her mother said gently. 'We should go back,'

'Mmm not yet.' Meg replied lazily. She was enjoying everything – the riding, the sunset and being with her family. Her older brother rode up, gently putting his hand on her shoulder.

'Mum's right, you need your rest,' his voice was calm and gentle.

'I haven't see you for ages, or ridden for years. Besides, I feel fine,'

Her mother pulled on the reins of her horse then Meg's, stopping them in their tracks.

'Meg, I know baby, but you've been sick. Come, its cold. You don't want it to get any worse,' her mother said, taking the reins of Meg's horse and leading them away.

Meg woke up crying. She remembered that horse ride – she was just recovering from pneumonia then. The memory made her smile as well – it was one she liked, from two years ago, if she was remembering it right. But the pain of losing her mum and brother made it hurt her more than her other lost memories. She got up and put on some clothes. Then she slipped out and went next door to Harm.

'It's 3 am!' He said as he heard her knock at the door. He opened it and let her in, taking her in his arms and letting her cry, despite his nakedness. He stroked her hair down; it was still a mess as she hadn't brushed it.

'Hey, what's wrong?'

'More memories,'

'Oh Meg, your mum and brother?' he guessed.

'Yes,' Meg replied, her voice muffled in his chest. He led her over to the couch and sat down with her.

'I can't sleep properly anymore, I hear their voices, I hear their final screams and final words to me…Harm, what's wrong with me?'

'Nothing, you're just grieving Meg. Sometimes it takes a long time to get over grief.'

'Did you ever find your dad?'

'Umm yeah, sort of, I found out I have a half brother…'

'Sergei?'

'Yeah…when Mac and I went to Russia, I found out he died there…I've said my goodbyes but it still hurts. I can't imagine how you must feel, knowing you saw the planes go into the towers that day,'

Meg let him hold her while she didn't say anything.

'Harm, can I stay here tonight?' Meg asked, falling asleep in his arms as she said it. Harm looked down at her and smiled, kissing her hair.

'Of course,' He put his arms around her and lifted her up, taking her to his bed.

'You stay here, and I'll take the couch,' He covered her with the blankets and left quietly.

JAG HQ

'Sleep well Lieutenant?' Turner asked Meg disdainfully as she came in the next day.

'Fine, thank you.' Meg answered.

'You and Harm have a good time together?'

Harriet came over when she saw Meg falter, as Harm and Mac had disappeared into AJ's office.

'Sir, that was uncalled for,'

'Did I ask your opinion?'

'No, but you have no right to make those assumptions.'

'She arrived with Harm,'

Meg scowled at Turner, he had gone too far.

'We live next door to each other. It makes logical sense for me to come to work with him in his car or vice versa instead of two cars. Is that so hard to understand?' Meg's voice was cold and even. Harriet and Turner looked at her in shock. She had never spoken like that to Turner, she was almost afraid of him, submissive around him.

'Lieutenant, do I need to…'

'Ma'am, the Admiral wants to see you,' Coates said to Meg.

'Thank you Coates,' Meg glared at Turner; glad Jen had come up before Turner had had a chance to finish his threat.

AJ's Office

'You wanted to see me sir?'

'Come in Meg, sit down.' AJ said to her. Meg sat down, unsure of what AJ wanted. When he saw her uncertainty, her nervousness he had to suppress a laugh.

'Meg, I didn't call you in here to reprimand you,' AJ said. 'I want to talk to you. How are you doing?'

'Fine sir, I'm slowly getting my memory back…'

'Commander Turner giving you trouble?'

Meg fell silent for a minute. 'Yes sir, he assumed that because I arrived with Harm this morning we slept together,'

'And did you?'

'No…I had…I was upset last night, I stayed at his place, nothing happened.' Meg was on the verge of crying again, the memory she'd dreamt about last night still fresh in her mind.

'Meg, is everything okay, tell me the truth.'

Meg stayed silent.

'You miss them,'

'Is it that obvious?'

'Meg, I know you almost as well as Harm and Mac know you. When you're upset it's not that hard to miss,'

'Sir…'

'Meg, you don't need to explain yourself to me. Send Commander Turner in will you? I want to have a little chat with him,'

'Sir, that will only make things worse,'

'Lieutenant, I cannot stand it when an officer under my command is hurting another. Dismissed Lieutenant, and send him in,'

'Yes sir,'

A few hours later

'You little….' Turner said threateningly to Meg as he came out of the lions den, AJ's office. Harm came up behind her, shielding her from Turner.

'Is there a problem, Sturgis?'

'She went to the Admiral…'

'Oh so she was supposed to put up with the way you treat her?' Harm said angrily, despite Meg's protests that she could fight her own battles.

'With all due respect, Commander Turner, I was within my rights.'

'The Admiral said that I could be transferred…and I will know who to blame if my career gets scuttled, Lieutenant.' Turner pushed past her roughly.

'If he…'

'Meg, cool it,'

'No, I think I have a right to vent like this Harm! He has…I should not have to put up with that, and I am going to tell him right now!' She made a move to confront Turner, ignoring the fact that he could make her feel inadequate in seconds, but Harm pulled her back.

'Not until you take a cold shower, Meg.' He said, pulling her into his office.

'Harm,'

'Meg, I know what he has done, but he is a part of this team! Lieutenant Singer and Commander Lindsey mistreated you! Hell Meg, Lindsey tried to…'

'I know Harm! I know what he tried to do to me, I was there remember?'

'So why is this different?' Harm's voice became gentle. 'You never filed complaints against Singer or Lindsey…'

'I did against Lindsey, nothing came of it.'

'And did you file a complaint against Singer?'

'No, but that was different,'

Harm rolled his eyes. 'Meg, three officers have tried to undermine you,'

'Harm, let it go! I've sorted things out with the Admiral about Turner – without your help!'

'Meg…'

'Harm, not now, I know what happened in Cuba, but you know that…'

'You're not ready…'

Meg looked at him apologetically and left. Harm watched as she left, feeling alone.

'I will love you no matter what,'