Chapter IX Seeds of Doubt

Promises and Dreams

By tk421beth

A/N: I want to thank ALL my reviewers! This chapter is for YOU ALL! I do appreciate everything you say, and you all keep me goin'! You ALL inspire me to write better. I LOVE YOU ALL!

Special thanks to Sue and Tom…you both rock my world!

Chapter Summary: Taking a break in Juarez, Jessie was just informed by Billy that Charlie is getting married!

The music was lively, and the fiesta in full swing by the time Billy and I arrived. We only just missed the wedding, but an abundance of food and drink were accessible now that the siesta was over. The local people, as well as the Regulators were dancing, eating and drinking. I spot Chavez dancing with a sweet little girl, and Steve dancing with an elderly woman, pausing from time to time to spit his tobacco. Doc was busy eating fajitas and drinking the local whisky by himself.

Billy and I danced over to Charlie and his bride, Manuela, a young beautiful Mexican gal. I congratulated Charlie, giving him a big hug, as well as Manuela, whom I didn't know until tonight.

"Jessie! Dance with me!" Charlie laughed as he took my hand, sounding a tad bit intoxicated. I laughed as well, as Billy twirled Manuela around, her long brown hair flowing in the air.

Charlie looked exceptionally content as he danced with me. "Well, I did it, Jessie!"

"I'm so happy for you, Charlie...Manuela's beautiful, and you look very handsome!" I meant it with all my heart. He did indeed look attractive in a new suit, boots, and an enormous smile plastered on his face. "You picked a good night to get married…the fiesta was planned before we got here."

"Yeah!" Charlie smiled, as we danced. "Gosh, you sure look nice."

"Thanks, Charlie." I smiled back at him, and tried not to blush.

Several minutes later, I excused myself, and sat down next to Doc, who was now reading and watching the merrymaking from afar, smoking a cigarette. "Hiya, Doc!" I said, cooling off by drinking some of the wine.

Doc grinned, as he put his book away. "You look very nice, Jessica. Are you having fun?"

"Thanks, Doc! I am having a lot of fun!" I observe the people dancing, and spot Billy talking and laughing with Charlie and Steve. He noticed my stare, and gave me a wink.

"What is that?" Doc indicated my necklace. He leaned over, and read the inscription on the front and back. I held my breath, waiting for him to yell at me…I could see the irritation in his eyes, but he didn't speak.

I sip the wine, and nibble on some of the fajitas. It tastes delicious!

"More than pals, huh?" Doc stated, staring at me intently. "Wonder where he picked that necklace up?"

I say nothing, and continue to eat and drink.

"Do you love him, Jessica?"

I see that his face full of concern, as I swallow my food. "Yes, I do, Doc. I do love Billy." There. I said it. It's out in the open now.

"Does he love you?"

"What's with all the questions tonight?" I nervously laugh, trying to change the subject. Billy didn't specifically tell me that he loved me, not those exact words, but I know he does. Of course he does! Does a bird love to fly?

"Jessica, I care about you and I don't want to see you get hurt." He persisted, holding my hand. "You're wise beyond your years, there's no doubt about that. But with matters of the heart…you're still a child."

I give Doc a spiteful glare, and remove my hand from his. "I can take care of myself, Doc."

He stubbed out his cigarette, his blue eyes still fixed on me. "How 'bout a dance?" Doc unexpectedly asks me, standing up and holding his hand out. I stood and smiled as I accepted Doc's hand. We headed towards the crowd of dancers.

Something unexpectedly stopped me in my tracks. I was staring at Billy, my Billy, who was dancing with a local gal. She was giggling loudly at something Billy was whispering into her ear.

My smile turned into a frown, as my eyes narrowed in hatred. What the hell was he doing with that whore! I went for my gun, and forgot that I was wearing a dress. My blood boiled. It was pure luck for Billy that I wasn't armed.

I see Doc give me a puzzled glance. He follows my stare and sighs, putting a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Sometimes things aren't always what they seem."

I spun around to face him. "What the hell do you mean by that?"

Doc's eyes followed Billy as he danced with the girl. "I always mean what I say, Jessica…and always say what I mean."

"Oh, shut it, Doc!" I spat angrily. Damn him and the way he always talks in riddles!

Doc told me to calm down, as we slowly began to dance. I couldn't keep my eyes off of Billy, no matter what I did. I took the lead, trying to edge us over where Billy was dancing with that woman. Did he just kiss her? I twisted my neck, trying to see what they were doing, forcing Doc over even closer to them. They both now were laughing and smiling. That rat bastard! I'll wipe that damned smile off his face…

"I'm supposed to lead, Jessica." I look up to see Doc's annoyed face. Giving me an intent look, he proceeded to take over, forcing us further and further away from Billy.

How could Billy do this to me? I told him I loved him! I tried to ignore the pangs of jealously, but could not disregard it. I hate Billy! No…I love him…oh, bloody hell!

Doc didn't say a word about Billy as we danced. He tried to cheer me up, but the frown on my face was there to stay. We were dancing near the adobe wall, away from the large crowd of dancers.

"Ahem!" I look towards my right and see Billy at my side, asking Doc if he could cut in and dance with me. I pleaded with Doc with my eyes, hoping he'd understand that I didn't want to dance with Billy. Doc gave me a small smirk, and placed my hand in Billy's.

Damnation to bloody hell! Why did he do that? Billy gave me a grin, as he grasped my other hand, and slowly pulled me towards him, his arms now around my waist.

"Whatsamatter, Jessie?" He gave me a devilish grin.

I looked up at him, glaring. As if he didn't know! If looks could kill…

"Aw, c'mon, sweetheart. Don't be like this! I was just havin' some fun!"

"It looked like you were having more than fun. Damn it, Billy! Why in the hell were you dancing with that…that…puta?" I blurted out puta…Spanish for whore. I tried to push Billy away, trying to twist out of his grasp. "Let me go!" He seemed amused by my struggles, and his hold around my waist only tightened. I wasn't going anywhere. "Let me go, damn you!"

"Jess…you don't want me to let you go, do you?" He whispered into my ear, as he pushed me up against the wall. He reached out a finger to gently trace the line of my jaw. Despite the fact that I'm still infuriated, Billy's touch sends a shiver down my spine. I silently curse my weakness; it is as if his mere touch arouses me! I feel my pulse race as a moan escapes my lips. I am under his spell…Billy has complete power over me, and he knows it. I can't look at him. I can't… "You look so damn beautiful when you're mad." His fingers travel down my neck, his caress warm and gentle just above my breasts. "I told you I'd take care of you…we're more than pals, remember?" His hand is now slowly stroking my neck, as he forces me to look into his startling blue eyes. "You love me, don't you, sweetheart?" He had a slight smile on his face, his eyes staring straight into mine. How can I resist? How can I stay angry? How can I say no to Billy? I do love him…I do…

Pushing me harder against the wall, he abruptly kisses me, hard, one hand on my neck, holding my head still, and the other pinning me to the wall, so I couldn't get away. I close my eyes as the kiss deepens…and all is forgiven. Billy sighs, and pulls me back to reality. We leisurely begin to dance, and my frown is now replaced with a wide smile.

Much later I find myself laughing hard at one of Billy's dirty jokes. I throw my arms around his neck, unable to stop laughing. I enjoy the feel of his hot breath against my face, as he too was laughing. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Doc staring at us, his expression grim.

Without warning, a large piñata was smashed open by a young child wielding a big stick. All the children of the village scrambled forward, trying to get at the hundreds of trinkets and candy all over the ground. Billy and I find ourselves being pushed out of the way by the small mob. We both laugh, and hand in hand, began to walk away from the fiesta, and towards the hotel.

"Where are we going? The party isn't over yet, Billy!" I complained with a smile, showing that I wasn't too disappointed.

"You bet your sweet derrière it ain't!" He kissed me, as his hands grasp my behind, pulling me close to him. "I ain't through with you yet!"

"Billy!" I giggled, my hands pressed against his chest. I could feel his desire hard on my thigh.

A huge shadow falls over us, and I look past Billy's shoulder to see a tall man with dark hair and eyes standing there, with a pistol in his hand. I gasp in terror. Who is that?

Billy right away perceives my fear, and quickly spins around; one of his guns suddenly in his hand. I find myself positioned behind Billy, his other arm extended out, protecting me. "Pat Garrett." Billy mutters. "What are you doing here?"

I allow myself to breathe. Pat Garrett was a known trail driver and buffalo hunter in Texas. Garrett was no bounty hunter, but why was he here in Juarez?

"I'm going back to Louisiana," He simply said, putting his gun away. "I wanted to see the boy who's become such a sensation since we last met." His dark eyes drifted to me, and his face lit up with a smile.

"This is the Sweetheart Shooter." Billy introduced me.

I mumbled a curse, as I took a step forward, and stood right next to Billy. Folding my arms in front of me, I scowled at my hated nickname.

"I thought her name was Jessica Tunstall." It was more of a statement than a question.

My mouth opened in surprise. He didn't call me the Sweetheart Shooter! I boldly stared at him, with a slight smile. His brown eyes held my gaze, as he smiled back. I suddenly felt like I was naked, the way his eyes slowly looked me up and down, so intense, that he saw right through me. My mouth went dry, as I felt my face flush. What the bloody hell is going on here?

"How'd you know I was here?" Billy's voice snapped me back to reality, his gun still pointed.

"I'm a tracker." His eyes were still fixed on me. "Gonna be a hell of a Sheriff if they elect me. The officials have asked me to run."

"I'm askin' you to run, too." He waved his gun north. "That way…or I'll take your scalp like I did Brady's."

"I'm not the law yet, Billy! And I'm not here to get your ass hairs up. The truth is, I'm here to tell you some bad news about a friend we share. McSween, Tunstall's lawyer."

What? What the hell is going on? What's he talking about? My head was spinning, and I felt faint, expecting to hear some awful news. Billy, who always senses my feelings, took hold of my hand, and squeezed it reassuringly.

"What about Alex?"

"He's gonna die. Tomorrow…he and his wife…at his house." Garrett sighed, and looked straight into my eyes. "Murphy knows he's coming back to Lincoln tomorrow. They're gonna wait until he's home, then go pay a visit."

I felt my heart leap into my throat. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't talk. That's right…Alex and Susan were in hiding. Why were they going back into Lincoln? Was this information Pat Garrett told us accurate? Was Murphy really going after Alex? Billy lowered his gun, and shoved it back into the holster. "What time are they expectin' him?"

"Supper time. I figured you're the only fella with the pluck to get up a bunch of McSween partisans and go give the man and his wife a rightful escort across the border." Garrett was still staring at me, and I wondered if Billy realized it. "I haven't been to Louisiana for quite a spell. I'll see ya, Billy." Garrett tipped his hat at me, as his brown eyes gaze over my body once more. "Miss Tunstall."

Billy then turned toward me, looking disturbed at this latest news. He let go of my hand, and folded his arms across his chest. "Garrett…are you my friend?"

I looked over Billy's shoulder. I saw Garrett turn slightly towards us, his hand hovering over his gun belt. I held my breath as he thought it over for a moment. Garrett then removed his hand away from his pistol. "Yes, I am, Bill." He then walked to his horse, mounted, and rode quietly away.

"What are we going to do, Billy?" I asked him, my lower lip trembling, thinking of Alex and Susan. We have to save them! We have to get them out of Lincoln!

Billy gently kissed my lips. "What we do best, Jess! We're gonna go back to Lincoln."

The wedding reception was still in full swing as I raced towards my hotel room and quickly changed into my riding gear. I packed everything back in my saddle bags, and headed outside to find Billy waiting for me with our horses, ready to go.

"Ready?" He asked me, a slight smirk on his face, as I made sure my saddlebags were in place. I nodded my agreement, as I mounted my mare.

Billy shot a single bullet up in the air to get everyone's attention. The music suddenly stopped; the dancing comes to an end. All eyes are on us. "REGULATORS!" He shouts, as we ride towards the middle of the fiesta.

I stare at Charlie, who looks as if a nightmare has now begun. Manuela was clutching him tight, starting to sob. My hearts goes out for him, as I hoped he wasn't going to be stupid enough to go with us. Charlie needs to stay here in Juarez with his bride.

"Charlie, maybe you should stay here." Billy tells him. "You can't shoot worth a damn…and you're wife is really cryin'. She's giving me a headache."

I give Billy a furious look, while I resist the urge to smack him.

Charlie looks numb, as he untangles himself from his bride, and slowly walks over to us and mounts his horse. Manuela cries loudly in her Mother's arms. I feel my throat tighten, wondering why Charlie is going with us. He just only got married! What the hell is wrong with him? He should stay here!

"Go ahead, Charlie, stay here," Doc tells him. "You got a wife now."

Charlie gives all of us a small smile. "It ain't easy havin' pals."

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