OO Last time I updated this story I was on SUMMER VACATION. It's been THREE MONTHS. Holy crap. .
"It's a big deal! This kid is constantly surrounded by Mustang and his freaking posse." The voice on the other end talked angrily, an octave higher than normal because of the bad phone connection. "Alright, alright! You don't need to yell at me!" Pause. "Yes, I know what you pay me to do!" Pause. "Yeah, I'll get Elric tonight."
"Hey, buddy, you've been on the phone for awhile. I need to call my little girl!" Lieutenant Colonel Hughes strode up to the person on the phone. The guy on the phone said bye abruptly to the person he was talking to, and walked away. Hughes muttered, grabbing the dangling phone and punching in Mustang's number.
"Hughes!" Roy greeted him loudly, making Maes hold it away from his ear and rolling his eyes at the blonde next to him.
"Jeez, Roy, don't blow my ear out!"
"I'm sick of this kid, Maes... All he does is whine!"
"Hey!" Someone yelled in the background. "You bastard Colonel!"
"And it took you long enough to get here." Roy finished, ignoring Ed's protests.
"Well, I did have to wait for Winry's train from Resembool, and then we had to get here..." Maes trailed off.
"DAMMIT ED!" Mustang roared. Hughes held the phone away from his ear again so Winry could hear the screams and a snapping noise.
"Hey...Brother? What just fell off your auto-mail...?" Winry's eyes grew black and bottomless as she heard Al from the phone. She turned and stared at a frightened Maes.
"What exactly did Ed do to himself?" She asked menacingly.
"Let's just find out, shall we?" Hughes hung up and led Winry towards Mustang's office, chuckling.
When they got there, however, Hughes wondered if that really was a good idea. The couch was on fire and Al was kneeling besides it, trying to draw an array while people screamed around him, Havoc and Hawkeye were yelling at Roy about something and Roy was chasing Ed around the office, snapping his fingers until he realized that Hawkeye and Havoc were yelling that Ed had dumped water on his gloves. Ed laughed loudly, toppling over and out of sight.
"EDWARD ELRIC!" Winry and Roy howled at the same time. Still in unison, they stomped up to the vertically challenged alchemist, screaming random obscenities. The only difference was that Hughes, Havoc, and Hawkeye--with their combined effort--managed to hold back the Flame Alchemist, but no one could hold Winry back. Ed cowered, scrambling under Mustang's desk to hide from her.
"Oh, no you don't," Winry growled, pulling on his arm. Ed yelped with pain, wrenching the arm away from her and cradling it with his other one. Although it had been a week since the experiment, he was still sore. Winry's eyes grew blankish, and she lowered the wrench she was holding up. With a start, she realized that Ed looked different since the last time he'd seen her. His arm and legs looked deformed; the arm being smaller and the leg being bigger, and his eyes were huge and wide, even though, of course, they do that when she normally approaches him with a wrench.
"Ed?" She backed down, away from the desk to give him ample room to crawl out of. "What exactly did you do to yourself? They just told me you had broken your auto-mail..."
"Er...Well..." Ed rubbed the back of his head sheepishly. "I might have gotten in the middle of a transmutation..."
"You TRANSMUTED YOURSELF!"
"Not really! Wait... Well, yeah..." Edward braced himself for Winry's next attack and caught a glimpse of everyone just staring at them. "You could help me!" He called helplessly before Winry's sheer anger forced him to run, therefore tripping on his too-small auto-mail.
Hawkeye and Maes snapped into action, holding Winry back while Ed looked himself into the bathroom, and from the sounds of it, trying to escape out the window.
"It's a third story window, dumbass..." Mustang wheezed, bent over from laughing.
--an hour later--
Ed glared at Roy and Jean from where he lay on the couch, his auto-mail arm hanging over the side for Winry to examine. "I hate you..." He pouted childishly.
"I love you too, Ed." Havoc and Mustang howled with laughter at the sour look on the alchemist's face when he heard that. Riza tutted and watched Winry work.
"I still don't get it, Ed, your auto-mail is completely inadequate now... I'll have to make new ones." She said, her voice muffled from her looking in her suit-case of mechanical parts. "What exactly did you do to yourself?"
"Well... Al and I were going to transmute a bird...OW!" Winry slapped him on the head, a cross look on her face. "It wouldn't have hurt it!" Ed protested.
"Anyway..." Winry ignored him.
"Anyway, we were going to transmute this thing, but the idiot bird walked off the transmutation circle right after we activated it, so I had to go get the damn bird back into it, and I got transmuted into the... Bird..." Winry stared at him blankly again.
"You're a bird?"
"No!"
"Brother..."
"Well, kinda." Edward brightened up some. "I have wings!"
--after Winry wakes up--
"Sorry about that," Ed grinned nervously. "Didn't think you'd freaking faint..."
"Well, you have wings for crying out loud!" Winry paused. "D'you think I could see them?" Here Ed hesitated. It still hurt to open them fully... But, hey, the more Winry passes out, the longer before she hits him again.
"Sure." Ed grinned. He'd be the last to admit it, but he loved attention... Not as much as the Colonel, however.
Even Havoc shut up when Ed took off his jacket and let his wings out. It really was a sight to see; this blonde kid with a wingspan longer than he is tall. Ed flapped his wings experimentally. Sure, it hurt, but the effect was amazing. The two girls and Al gasped, and Roy and Jean blinked more than they normally would have.
"Gee, Ed, I'll have to see the Fuhrer about changing your military nickname to something wind related. Surely you could do a lot of alchemic attacks with all that wind you can make from your wings." Mustang kidded. Edward grinned.
"No, Mustang, you should have the wind nickname. Fire grows bigger with wind, and after all, your head's full of it."
"Shrimp..." Mustang muttered angrily.
"We're not going to tell the Fuhrer anything!"
"Are you saying you're going to lie to the leader of our country, Hawkeye?"
"I'm saying I don't want Ed to be hauled off to a lab." Their argument stopped, however, when they realized that Winry and Ed were screaming at each other again.
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU WANT ME TO 'HURRY UP'!"
"I MEAN I'M A BUSY PERSON AND I CAN'T BE WAITING ON YOU TO WORK ON A BUNCH OF DIFFERENT AUTO-MAIL CRAP THAT I WON'T EVEN NOTICE!"
"WELL, DO YOU WANT IT TO FALL APART!"
"THAT DEPENDS, DO YOU WANT TO GET PAID!"
"SHUT UP!" Al screamed. Everyone turned to stare at him, dumbfounded. "You won't be going anywhere anyway, Ed!"
"He's right, you know." Hawkeye agreed. "You're stuck here."
"Until what!"
"Until..." Mustang and Hawkeye exchanged glances quickly. When would Ed ever be able to go free again?
Sucky chapter. WOOOOOOOO.
I'm writing an original story loosely based off of FMA, and there's a character named Jake... I kept wanting to type "Jake" instead of "Jean." O.O Speaking of which, I'm very behind on that too... Runrunrun...
I'm too lazy to look up reviews, but thank you so much, all the nice people that started reading at the first chapter, and the three? two? people that have just started reading. Avian!Ed plushies for you all!