Title: Lonely at the Top Ch 5/?
Author: Kate,
Disclaimer: I do not own Kalasin, Lianne, Buri, Kaddar, Carthak, Tortall or any of the people/places named in this story. I am not making a profit and no infringement is intended.
Rating: PG
Author's Note: I sincerely apologize for the long delay with this chapter. When I last posted in March, I was in the middle of an intense semester that led to a really tough April and May. I thought that when I came home for the summer I would be able to write and update immediately, but I have begun work at a full time job. Real life isn't an adequate excuse, and I apologize sincerely for the long delay. Let me extend my thanks to those who remained loyal readers, especially Lady Silvamord. Her encouragement reminded me that someone is reading. I promise that in the future, updates will be more frequent. Thanks for bearing with me.
Ch 5
Queen Thayet sat on her throne, at the right hand of her husband and co- monarch Jonathan IV of Conté. The queen's posture was impeccable, her gown simple but exquisite and her face was as lovely as ever. Age had not destroyed her beauty, but added wisdom to the strength, pride and humor.
Yet there was something different about the queen on this day. Usually, on the last day of the festival of Mithros, the queen was inclined to kindness to those who brought grievances before her. But today, though the queen listened with steady attention, her answers were less sympathetic than in years past. Something was troubling the noble lady, and though she had not denied anyone justice, those who knew her best felt that something was missing.
The evening bells rang, and a recess was announced. When the last subject had filed out of the room, Jonathan set aside his scepter. "Thayet, what's wrong?"
"Nothing." His queen said sheepishly. She rubbed her neck, which was stiff from being held in one position for so long.
"You usually enjoy these days." Jon observed. "You like setting things right without interference."
Thayet sighed. "It's been six days. We should've had a letter by now, telling us that they've arrived safely in Carthak." She confessed her concern in a low tone.
Jon reached out to massage Thayet's stiff neck and shoulders. "But I looked in the fire last night and we saw that they were all at a feast. You know they're fine. Admit it, there's something else troubling you."
Thayet sighed, as the Prime Minister approached with a stack of documents, a pitcher of liquid, and a loaf of bread. "George arrived last night, with Aly. I heard her tale from her own lips, and it's been troubling me."
"The Copper Isles?" Gary was instantly alert. "What about them? A flaw in the new regime? Think Aly should've stayed on? Want Liam to skip Galla and go to court a half-raka half-luarin queen?"
"Nothing political." Thayet reassured them. "Just," She paused. "You remember, George mentioned dream visions? Aly told me that in one of them she saw Kalasin, and that she was in great need."
Jonathan tensed. "Why didn't she say so immediately?" His quiet anger was apparent to the two who knew him best. "We should've been alerted, so we could dispatch a force."
Thayet sighed. "Aly couldn't say in need of what, or when it was, or anything of the sort. Just that Kalasin needed something or someone and couldn't find it or get it. And I think about her, so far away and so lonely."
"You think she's lonely?" Gary asked in genuine surprise, chewing a mouthful of bread.
"I know it. I was lonely here, and I had Buri and Alanna and you and then Kuri and Onua." Thayet thought for a moment, trying to reassure them about her own frame of mind without detracting from her daughter's plight. "I had nothing to go back to, no one to miss but the past. Kalasin brought nothing but a horse and her clothes, but she left behind five siblings, two parents and a host of extended family."
"She had paintings and books and homey things like midwinter gifts and birthday charms." Gary tried to reassure his friend, feeling the insufficiency of his words as he spoke.
"Things aren't people." Thayet said simply. "And you've read her letters, how dark they were for a time."
Jon sighed. "Think of it this way. She's well clothed and well fed. She has a fine roof over her head and people around her to protect her. It's more than some of our refugees."
Thayet turned away from him. "As you say." Her voice was muffled, but Gary knew he would never want Cythera to speak to him in that tone.
"Thayet, do you think I don't hate it too?" Jon hissed. "Do you think there aren't days when I want to send a fast ship and bring her home to play dolls with her sisters and learn healing from Duke Baird and perform riding stunts that stop my heart to watch?"
"You don't react when the boys do those riding tricks." Thayet picked up an ancient grievance between them.
"I was a boy. I know that even when we break we heal." Jon nodded at Gary. "Ask him. We spent half our lives in pieces."
"Alanna healed."
"The hand of the Goddess is on her, and even then she broke her collarbone, bruised and bloodied her body, overused her magic, and was left an inch shy of death every chance she got."
"You just can't stand to see your little girls in pain." Thayet accused.
"Does that make me such a bad person then?" Jonathan demanded of his queen. "That I would protect my daughters from harm?"
Gary barely restrained himself from flinching away. This was the kind of argument he hadn't seen since Jon dissuaded his eldest daughter from pursuing a career as a knight. Thayet had labeled him a hypocrite in the heat of anger. If it were too dangerous for Kalasin to be a knight, why was Roald training to be one? Jonathan had agreed to raise their children, male and female, with equal opportunities, but his actions contradicted his promises.
"If it's too dangerous for a daughter, why is it safe enough for a son?" Thayet huffed. "I know you want the best for them. It's just that they're stronger than you know. And they have so much faith in you that if you treat them as though they are weaker or less worthy than their brothers, they will begin to believe they are weaker or less worthy."
Jon swallowed. So many strong women surrounded him. Those strong willed women acted as role models for his precious daughters. He disliked considering that his protectiveness would harm them. "Thayet, if I could, I would pack each and every one of my children in cotton wool. If I could get the parents in other countries to agree, I would burn all arrows and bows, melt down swords and glaives and weapons into farmer's plows and live in a world where killing is totally unnecessary."
Gary snorted. "Alanna would skewer you before you took her sword." He said, trying to break the tension. "It's a pipedream, Jon."
Jon made a face at his cousin. "But we live in a real world, my love, and who are we to stop them?"
Thayet sighed. "I just want them all to have equal opportunities."
A small side door opened, and the Baron of Pirate's Swoop ambled in as easily as if he were king. "The first of the reports from Buri and Lianne are in. I thought it mind set your Majesties at ease." He produced a packet of letters from his sleeve with a sleight of hand trick long left over from his days as a thief.
Thayet eagerly took the missive written in Buri's hand, while Jon broke the seal on Lianne's letter. Gary concentrated on the food, which he shared with his old friend. The queen skimmed the coded letter from her erst- while bodyguard, searching for news of Kalasin.
George crossed back easily, watching the parents but concentrating on the queen. "I've some idea of what you suffer." He murmured to Thayet, as she looked up from the letter blinking tears. "When Aly was missing I felt as though my breath had been stolen from me."
"And after you found her?" Thayet's voice was rusty.
"Then it was like waiting for my heart to beat, to know whether the lass was alright or in trouble." George said. "But your Kalasin is clever as she needs to be, with a heart big enough to hold even Carthak."
Thayet returned to the letter to read with more detail, pausing only for a puzzling bit at the end. It was a few sentences in a code she remembered from life in Sarain. It was one Thayet and Buri had learned from their K'miri mothers. It was a language as old as horses and wind, and it took work for Thayet to assemble meaning from the words. When she had finally assembled the meaning, she gasped. Color drained from her face, and she leaned forward, making a pained noise.
Jon tossed away the letter and grabbed his wife's hand. Gary filled a cup with wine and pressed it into Thayet's hand. She drained it without knowing what she drank, then began to whisper an ancient prayer for healing and peace.
Gary gave the queen a concerned look. "Should I fetch a healer?" He asked, feeling helpless as a page in the face of a spidren.
"I am a healer." Jon snapped.
"What news?" George asked. His voice was laconic, but his body had tensed almost imperceptibly.
"Jon, do you remember how her letters were? And what happened to me between Kally and Liam?" Thayet choked. "It's the same."
Unwillingly, Jon's eyes teared. "Why didn't we know this sooner?" He confronted George, covering sorrow with anger.
The spy met his king's eye. "The knowledge was confined to the mage who cast the spell that killed the child, the emperor and the healers."
"But you knew." Thayet accused, anger and betrayal clouding her eyes.
"It's treason to keep secrets like that." Gary said, sardonically, because there were many secrets among the four there gathered.
"I visited Carthak, after I went to see Aly in the Copper Isles." He told the queen, king, and Prime Minister. "I pried the knowledge out of the healer, but no one else did. She had silencing spells on her that were Kally's work—much improved from the days when she and Thom and Roald snitched jam tarts from the cook and spelled her not to tell."
Jon's anger did not waver.
"I asked the emperor about it, and he told me that after losing the little one, Kally went through a rough spell where getting out of bed in the morning was an accomplishment. The thing that kept her going was keeping it secret. She thought Your Majesties might quarrel over it, and she couldn't bear such a thought." George met their eyes. "And what could you have done for it or her? Send the Wildmage to awaken the child in her womb as she did with Kitten and Skysong?"
"If Aly had conceived and lost her child while she was far away, and I had that knowledge, what would you have done if I had kept it from you?" Jonathan asked.
George bowed his head only, in a gesture that was more nod than obeisance. "I would be as angry as you are now." He agreed. "But think of it this way: your child loved you so that she wanted to protect you the same way she's used to being protected."
Gary sighed. "Jon, you'd have gone out of your mind. Thayet, you'd have blamed him and flown off the handle, and the rest of us would've broken our hearts. But look at it this way: now she's six months along and Buri is between trouble and her."
"It's not right." Thayet stood, and looked George in the eye. "It's not right that I didn't know."
"No." George met her eyes. "It's not. But examine me. There were silencing spells on me as well, set to break only after you learned the truth. I allowed them because it was for the best, but I'll take the consequences."
Jonathan bathed George in blue light, then nodded. "True enough. It's just a thread, but he can't consciously string together the sentence 'Kalasin miscarried' or variations with synonyms."
"It's not right." Thayet repeated. She was a strong woman, but this news left her dizzy.
"How would you have helped her?" Gary asked, reasonably.
"I would've explained what happened to me, that's all." Thayet wavered, then sat again. "I just can't believe that something that big could happen to her without me knowing it or feeling it somehow. It's like I failed."
"I'm the Voice of the Tribes. I touch her once a week and I didn't know." Jonathan sighed.
George took Thayet's pretty hand and kissed the back of it. "I've sent her odds and bits from here and there. Sand from the Swoop, dirt from the forest. She wants to have Tortall always with her."
Jon rubbed his wife's back. "You'll be able to see the name-day, anyway. That's something." He told her. Over the years, their marriage worked because they were partners in everything they did. He gave her the freedom to be who she was. He hadn't been angry over the infamous pink tissue dress incident, had been amused but indignant on her behalf at the monkey menagerie conspiracy, had laughed with her. But he stayed home and did administration while she spent wild summers training the Riders and Queen's Ladies. She had finally given up the Riders to Buri and devoted herself to being Queen for the Progress and her growing children. Though Thayet was not yet old, she was no longer young either. She would wield a weapon until the day she died, but she was more content to do so at her husband's side.
"It's not enough." Thayet said.
"No, but it is something." George said. "And just think, you'll be there in the flesh. You'll be able to talk to her and hold the baby and calm and comfort them both."
Thayet shook her head. Three men trying to console a mother for separation from her daughter and the loss of a grandchild she never knew. "It's just that there literally are no words for that kind of pain. A woman who loses her husband is a widow. A child who loses its parents is an orphan. But there is no word that means a parent who lost a child. It is, quite simply, unspeakable pain."
Jon simply touched his wife, letting her lean into him. Their marriage worked because they could share strength. "Lianne sounds happy, though. I don't think she knows yet."
"What does her letter say?"
"Kalasin is bone-tired and works much too hard, but Carthak is reforming. They love her in their own way, and producing an heir might just convince the holdouts. She seems to love Kaddar. They have a good, solid marriage. They respect each other, but they are still a bit stiff and formal. She thinks that Kalasin's life would improve a hundred times if she and Kaddar could be friends as well as respectful partners. Right now they still keep a distance between them." Jon shrugged. "And according to our youngest girl, Kally eats potatoes like she hasn't seen them in five years. I wonder where she came by that trait."
Thayet had to smile. "I'll be sure to bring more with me when I go down. I never would've thought she would be so attached to that food, anyway. I mean, as a K'mir she really should be fond of rice."
"Lianne's happy though?" Gary interrupted. "She's been drooping about here ever since she came back from the visit to the Maren court."
"I think she likes having a break from our critical eyes. Buri's sharp, but she doesn't watch every second for slips." Jon guessed. "I thought I understood women until I had daughters ready to marry."
Thayet's lips twitched. "George, if you happen to see your son, make sure to mention that the princess arrived safe in Carthak."
"Wasn't part of the point of the visit to separate those two?" Gary asked, as he delicately picked through a fruit bowl.
George shrugged. "If you're worried about my lads and your lasses, it's the brainy daughter and the scholar son I'd watch. Nora has plots and plans for the country and for Thom, mark my words."
"I thought Nora was flirting with Alan?" Jon asked, looking honestly confused. Had it really been so long since he and Gary were participating in the social rituals of balls and flirtations?
"As a cover, so she could flirt with Thom." Thayet said. "Though I think the cover did fool Lianne. Which leads to a good point. Are we going to arrange marriages outside of Tortall for all of our children?"
Jon sighed. "Well, Nora won't really permit it, will she? Maybe we could send her to a convent to be a daughter of the Goddess for a while."
Gary smirked. "She's too old and set in her ways. They won't take her now."
"What news does your father send us?" Thayet asked.
"Just that it's a delight to have a lively young person clattering through Naxen again." Gary finally held up a plum. "This from Olau?"
"Yes, Myles sent sacks of the best from his orchard." George replied. "I'm not a noble born, but if you'll let me make an observation?"
"George, there's no need for that kind of formality when it's just us. What do you think?" Thayet asked, solemn eyes meeting solemn eyes.
"It's all well and good to make peace with our neighbors, but it wouldn't harm anything to make some peace at home. For the most part, Tortallans are open-minded folks. They don't always treat the Bazhir as they should, maybe, but they're not often cruel to foreign folk. Yet if you set up alliances with the Yamani Isles, Carthak, Galla, the Copper Isles, Maren and Tyra, folks are going to start to wonder what's wrong with the folks in our own country. I'm not saying Nora should marry my Thom—may the gods help us all if she do. And I'm not saying that sweet Lia ought to wed one of my lads, for all that she got so fond of Alan while they were in Maren. But if the girls are in love with some young fellow of the Court, what harm if one or two ally themselves with noble houses within these borders?"
Jon rubbed his face. "You're right." He mumbled. "I've concentrated so much on foreign affairs I hadn't thought that people might wonder what's wrong with Tortall."
Gary nodded. "There's a logic to it when you say it like that. I just never heard anyone process it that way before."
"Then you, my lads, don't spend enough time in inns and bars mingling with the common folks." George teased.
"With my face on every coin, I don't think that's a good idea." Jon said simply.
"Me? I don't leave the palace anymore unless my wife reminds me." Gary grinned after he swallowed the last of the plum.
Thayet shook her head. "So, Alan to Lianne." She said, nodding as if terms had been drawn and signed. "But what about Nora?"
"I think that directing some of her considerable energy toward studying Maren would be a wise way to go." Jon said thoughtfully. "We'll ask her to research it on her sister's behalf. If we're lucky, and I have a feeling we may well be, she'll become fascinated with the country. If she falls in love with the place, then she'll agree to marry the young prince Lia didn't particularly like, even if he is a bit thick."
"Jon, do you really think she could be happy like that?" Thayet protested.
"Nora is happiest when she has a finger in every pie." Gary pronounced. "Lia told us that if she marries the Maren man, he'll retreat to the library and leave her to run the country. Nora would be in her element with such a large prosperous country."
"Well, anyway, it's an idea." George said. "Just ask her to study it. Send her a few books. If she likes it, she'll ask for more. If she doesn't, we think of another idea."
"Very sensible. Thank you, George." Thayet stood and shook out her skirt. "Now, we have thirty minutes to get to the temple of Mithros to close this festival. Then, we must write letters to Buri and Lianne and Kalasin. Have we a courier worthy of trust?"
"I mistrust that gleam in your eye, my lady." George said. "What are you thinking?"
"Why don't we ask Raoul to take the letters to his wife? Raoul and his godson, his soon-to-be squire?" Thayet grinned.
Gary sighed. "It's official. She's begun to scheme and match make. The Gods help us all, before you know it she'll be introducing my son to some little lass and signing a marriage contract when my back is turned."
"Oh, stop exaggerating. Fifteen is plenty old enough for a romance, even if it is a bit young for a wedding." Thayet said.
"Who were you having a romance with at fifteen?" Jon teased his wife.
"Oh, you don't have to mind that." She grinned. "Besides, I've heard all about the romantic escapades of your youths." The queen sailed out of the room, still clutching Buri's letter.
"At least I know she won't put a frog in my bed over this." Jon commented to Gary. "It's her bed too, so it would be like punishing herself."
"Sire, if I were you, I would still sleep elsewhere tonight." Gary told his old friend. "Come on now George, what's the news with Aly?"
"My lass brought that blasted crow home from the Copper Isles and I'll never know a moment's peace until her mother either blows up at it or says hello like a kind woman." George adopted the mannerisms of a Player and sighed deeply. "It's really a shame that you can't freeze children at the age of say, seven and keep them loving and lovable forever."
Gary grimaced. He adored his own children, especially his little girls. "Maybe we should ask Numair to research that." He joked.
"It's too late now." Jon mumbled. "That I should live to see the day when my children court your children." He shook his head. "That's even more frightening than watching Lianne practice that stunt riding she's so fond of. When did we grow old?"
"Speak for yourself. At heart I'm still the same age as I ever was. It's just this body that appears older." Gary said. "We better follow her. Time to end the festival of Mithros and justice for the year."
Jon stood and squared his shoulders. "Thanks for getting the news here George." The king looked embarrassed. "And I am sorry that I spoke the way I did about your handling of Kalasin's troubles. It's just—I still think of her as the little pigtailed girl who followed Roald as though he were the sun and moon. It's hard to think of her as a wife and mother, because I wasn't there to see it happen. So I tend to overreact to bad news about her. I do apologize though."
"Lad, I've known you since you were a young sprite. I knew how you would react to this news and I don't blame ye. Now go and do your duty. Since the silencing spell is broken I can talk about the lass a bit more, later."
"Thank you." Jon said. He executed a crisp bow, turned and left the room. Gary bid George farewell more casually, trotting to keep up with the king. George sat at the table and gathered up Lianne's letter, smiling slightly. So there may yet be a chance for Alan to be happy. With Thayet on the side of the princess and the squire, there was a chance indeed. The father smiled, allowing himself a momentary daydream about a future filled with grandchildren and lazy days at the Swoop with his Lioness.
Notes to individual reviewers:
Jowa-Thank you so much for the compliment. I'm glad you like my writing. And "original idea"—my goodness, I'm blushing. :) I'm sorry I didn't update so quickly, but now that should improve.
Trickster666-Thank you for the compliments and the name suggestions! They're very well thought out and the website was helpful. I don't know how long I'll keep it going, but this is not the end. I promise at least three more chapters and a related vignette. I'm really glad you're enjoying this. Thanks for saying you're enjoying my writing style and the way I think out the characters. I'm honored that you think so.
Starrika-Thank you for the compliment about characterization. It's one of the areas I think about a lot as a writer, so I'm glad I'm succeeding.
Lady Silvamord—Wow!! You are my best reviewer. I'm sorry the update was so long in coming, but THANK YOU for your persistence and interest in this story. Thanks for the name and twin suggestion too. All I can say is "we'll see." I'm glad you enjoyed chapter 4. I'm sorry Kalasin and Kaddar aren't in chapter 5, but they didn't want to come out to play until chapter 6. You're right, Kalasin does have a streak of mischief in her. It hasn't shown itself lately because she's had her company face and manners on for four years straight. Don't worry, her sister will help her remember how to relax. Lianne's going to make it her mission to help Kalasin and Kaddar stop being polite to each other all the time and have some fun. Thank you again for your encouragement.
Author: Kate,
Disclaimer: I do not own Kalasin, Lianne, Buri, Kaddar, Carthak, Tortall or any of the people/places named in this story. I am not making a profit and no infringement is intended.
Rating: PG
Author's Note: I sincerely apologize for the long delay with this chapter. When I last posted in March, I was in the middle of an intense semester that led to a really tough April and May. I thought that when I came home for the summer I would be able to write and update immediately, but I have begun work at a full time job. Real life isn't an adequate excuse, and I apologize sincerely for the long delay. Let me extend my thanks to those who remained loyal readers, especially Lady Silvamord. Her encouragement reminded me that someone is reading. I promise that in the future, updates will be more frequent. Thanks for bearing with me.
Ch 5
Queen Thayet sat on her throne, at the right hand of her husband and co- monarch Jonathan IV of Conté. The queen's posture was impeccable, her gown simple but exquisite and her face was as lovely as ever. Age had not destroyed her beauty, but added wisdom to the strength, pride and humor.
Yet there was something different about the queen on this day. Usually, on the last day of the festival of Mithros, the queen was inclined to kindness to those who brought grievances before her. But today, though the queen listened with steady attention, her answers were less sympathetic than in years past. Something was troubling the noble lady, and though she had not denied anyone justice, those who knew her best felt that something was missing.
The evening bells rang, and a recess was announced. When the last subject had filed out of the room, Jonathan set aside his scepter. "Thayet, what's wrong?"
"Nothing." His queen said sheepishly. She rubbed her neck, which was stiff from being held in one position for so long.
"You usually enjoy these days." Jon observed. "You like setting things right without interference."
Thayet sighed. "It's been six days. We should've had a letter by now, telling us that they've arrived safely in Carthak." She confessed her concern in a low tone.
Jon reached out to massage Thayet's stiff neck and shoulders. "But I looked in the fire last night and we saw that they were all at a feast. You know they're fine. Admit it, there's something else troubling you."
Thayet sighed, as the Prime Minister approached with a stack of documents, a pitcher of liquid, and a loaf of bread. "George arrived last night, with Aly. I heard her tale from her own lips, and it's been troubling me."
"The Copper Isles?" Gary was instantly alert. "What about them? A flaw in the new regime? Think Aly should've stayed on? Want Liam to skip Galla and go to court a half-raka half-luarin queen?"
"Nothing political." Thayet reassured them. "Just," She paused. "You remember, George mentioned dream visions? Aly told me that in one of them she saw Kalasin, and that she was in great need."
Jonathan tensed. "Why didn't she say so immediately?" His quiet anger was apparent to the two who knew him best. "We should've been alerted, so we could dispatch a force."
Thayet sighed. "Aly couldn't say in need of what, or when it was, or anything of the sort. Just that Kalasin needed something or someone and couldn't find it or get it. And I think about her, so far away and so lonely."
"You think she's lonely?" Gary asked in genuine surprise, chewing a mouthful of bread.
"I know it. I was lonely here, and I had Buri and Alanna and you and then Kuri and Onua." Thayet thought for a moment, trying to reassure them about her own frame of mind without detracting from her daughter's plight. "I had nothing to go back to, no one to miss but the past. Kalasin brought nothing but a horse and her clothes, but she left behind five siblings, two parents and a host of extended family."
"She had paintings and books and homey things like midwinter gifts and birthday charms." Gary tried to reassure his friend, feeling the insufficiency of his words as he spoke.
"Things aren't people." Thayet said simply. "And you've read her letters, how dark they were for a time."
Jon sighed. "Think of it this way. She's well clothed and well fed. She has a fine roof over her head and people around her to protect her. It's more than some of our refugees."
Thayet turned away from him. "As you say." Her voice was muffled, but Gary knew he would never want Cythera to speak to him in that tone.
"Thayet, do you think I don't hate it too?" Jon hissed. "Do you think there aren't days when I want to send a fast ship and bring her home to play dolls with her sisters and learn healing from Duke Baird and perform riding stunts that stop my heart to watch?"
"You don't react when the boys do those riding tricks." Thayet picked up an ancient grievance between them.
"I was a boy. I know that even when we break we heal." Jon nodded at Gary. "Ask him. We spent half our lives in pieces."
"Alanna healed."
"The hand of the Goddess is on her, and even then she broke her collarbone, bruised and bloodied her body, overused her magic, and was left an inch shy of death every chance she got."
"You just can't stand to see your little girls in pain." Thayet accused.
"Does that make me such a bad person then?" Jonathan demanded of his queen. "That I would protect my daughters from harm?"
Gary barely restrained himself from flinching away. This was the kind of argument he hadn't seen since Jon dissuaded his eldest daughter from pursuing a career as a knight. Thayet had labeled him a hypocrite in the heat of anger. If it were too dangerous for Kalasin to be a knight, why was Roald training to be one? Jonathan had agreed to raise their children, male and female, with equal opportunities, but his actions contradicted his promises.
"If it's too dangerous for a daughter, why is it safe enough for a son?" Thayet huffed. "I know you want the best for them. It's just that they're stronger than you know. And they have so much faith in you that if you treat them as though they are weaker or less worthy than their brothers, they will begin to believe they are weaker or less worthy."
Jon swallowed. So many strong women surrounded him. Those strong willed women acted as role models for his precious daughters. He disliked considering that his protectiveness would harm them. "Thayet, if I could, I would pack each and every one of my children in cotton wool. If I could get the parents in other countries to agree, I would burn all arrows and bows, melt down swords and glaives and weapons into farmer's plows and live in a world where killing is totally unnecessary."
Gary snorted. "Alanna would skewer you before you took her sword." He said, trying to break the tension. "It's a pipedream, Jon."
Jon made a face at his cousin. "But we live in a real world, my love, and who are we to stop them?"
Thayet sighed. "I just want them all to have equal opportunities."
A small side door opened, and the Baron of Pirate's Swoop ambled in as easily as if he were king. "The first of the reports from Buri and Lianne are in. I thought it mind set your Majesties at ease." He produced a packet of letters from his sleeve with a sleight of hand trick long left over from his days as a thief.
Thayet eagerly took the missive written in Buri's hand, while Jon broke the seal on Lianne's letter. Gary concentrated on the food, which he shared with his old friend. The queen skimmed the coded letter from her erst- while bodyguard, searching for news of Kalasin.
George crossed back easily, watching the parents but concentrating on the queen. "I've some idea of what you suffer." He murmured to Thayet, as she looked up from the letter blinking tears. "When Aly was missing I felt as though my breath had been stolen from me."
"And after you found her?" Thayet's voice was rusty.
"Then it was like waiting for my heart to beat, to know whether the lass was alright or in trouble." George said. "But your Kalasin is clever as she needs to be, with a heart big enough to hold even Carthak."
Thayet returned to the letter to read with more detail, pausing only for a puzzling bit at the end. It was a few sentences in a code she remembered from life in Sarain. It was one Thayet and Buri had learned from their K'miri mothers. It was a language as old as horses and wind, and it took work for Thayet to assemble meaning from the words. When she had finally assembled the meaning, she gasped. Color drained from her face, and she leaned forward, making a pained noise.
Jon tossed away the letter and grabbed his wife's hand. Gary filled a cup with wine and pressed it into Thayet's hand. She drained it without knowing what she drank, then began to whisper an ancient prayer for healing and peace.
Gary gave the queen a concerned look. "Should I fetch a healer?" He asked, feeling helpless as a page in the face of a spidren.
"I am a healer." Jon snapped.
"What news?" George asked. His voice was laconic, but his body had tensed almost imperceptibly.
"Jon, do you remember how her letters were? And what happened to me between Kally and Liam?" Thayet choked. "It's the same."
Unwillingly, Jon's eyes teared. "Why didn't we know this sooner?" He confronted George, covering sorrow with anger.
The spy met his king's eye. "The knowledge was confined to the mage who cast the spell that killed the child, the emperor and the healers."
"But you knew." Thayet accused, anger and betrayal clouding her eyes.
"It's treason to keep secrets like that." Gary said, sardonically, because there were many secrets among the four there gathered.
"I visited Carthak, after I went to see Aly in the Copper Isles." He told the queen, king, and Prime Minister. "I pried the knowledge out of the healer, but no one else did. She had silencing spells on her that were Kally's work—much improved from the days when she and Thom and Roald snitched jam tarts from the cook and spelled her not to tell."
Jon's anger did not waver.
"I asked the emperor about it, and he told me that after losing the little one, Kally went through a rough spell where getting out of bed in the morning was an accomplishment. The thing that kept her going was keeping it secret. She thought Your Majesties might quarrel over it, and she couldn't bear such a thought." George met their eyes. "And what could you have done for it or her? Send the Wildmage to awaken the child in her womb as she did with Kitten and Skysong?"
"If Aly had conceived and lost her child while she was far away, and I had that knowledge, what would you have done if I had kept it from you?" Jonathan asked.
George bowed his head only, in a gesture that was more nod than obeisance. "I would be as angry as you are now." He agreed. "But think of it this way: your child loved you so that she wanted to protect you the same way she's used to being protected."
Gary sighed. "Jon, you'd have gone out of your mind. Thayet, you'd have blamed him and flown off the handle, and the rest of us would've broken our hearts. But look at it this way: now she's six months along and Buri is between trouble and her."
"It's not right." Thayet stood, and looked George in the eye. "It's not right that I didn't know."
"No." George met her eyes. "It's not. But examine me. There were silencing spells on me as well, set to break only after you learned the truth. I allowed them because it was for the best, but I'll take the consequences."
Jonathan bathed George in blue light, then nodded. "True enough. It's just a thread, but he can't consciously string together the sentence 'Kalasin miscarried' or variations with synonyms."
"It's not right." Thayet repeated. She was a strong woman, but this news left her dizzy.
"How would you have helped her?" Gary asked, reasonably.
"I would've explained what happened to me, that's all." Thayet wavered, then sat again. "I just can't believe that something that big could happen to her without me knowing it or feeling it somehow. It's like I failed."
"I'm the Voice of the Tribes. I touch her once a week and I didn't know." Jonathan sighed.
George took Thayet's pretty hand and kissed the back of it. "I've sent her odds and bits from here and there. Sand from the Swoop, dirt from the forest. She wants to have Tortall always with her."
Jon rubbed his wife's back. "You'll be able to see the name-day, anyway. That's something." He told her. Over the years, their marriage worked because they were partners in everything they did. He gave her the freedom to be who she was. He hadn't been angry over the infamous pink tissue dress incident, had been amused but indignant on her behalf at the monkey menagerie conspiracy, had laughed with her. But he stayed home and did administration while she spent wild summers training the Riders and Queen's Ladies. She had finally given up the Riders to Buri and devoted herself to being Queen for the Progress and her growing children. Though Thayet was not yet old, she was no longer young either. She would wield a weapon until the day she died, but she was more content to do so at her husband's side.
"It's not enough." Thayet said.
"No, but it is something." George said. "And just think, you'll be there in the flesh. You'll be able to talk to her and hold the baby and calm and comfort them both."
Thayet shook her head. Three men trying to console a mother for separation from her daughter and the loss of a grandchild she never knew. "It's just that there literally are no words for that kind of pain. A woman who loses her husband is a widow. A child who loses its parents is an orphan. But there is no word that means a parent who lost a child. It is, quite simply, unspeakable pain."
Jon simply touched his wife, letting her lean into him. Their marriage worked because they could share strength. "Lianne sounds happy, though. I don't think she knows yet."
"What does her letter say?"
"Kalasin is bone-tired and works much too hard, but Carthak is reforming. They love her in their own way, and producing an heir might just convince the holdouts. She seems to love Kaddar. They have a good, solid marriage. They respect each other, but they are still a bit stiff and formal. She thinks that Kalasin's life would improve a hundred times if she and Kaddar could be friends as well as respectful partners. Right now they still keep a distance between them." Jon shrugged. "And according to our youngest girl, Kally eats potatoes like she hasn't seen them in five years. I wonder where she came by that trait."
Thayet had to smile. "I'll be sure to bring more with me when I go down. I never would've thought she would be so attached to that food, anyway. I mean, as a K'mir she really should be fond of rice."
"Lianne's happy though?" Gary interrupted. "She's been drooping about here ever since she came back from the visit to the Maren court."
"I think she likes having a break from our critical eyes. Buri's sharp, but she doesn't watch every second for slips." Jon guessed. "I thought I understood women until I had daughters ready to marry."
Thayet's lips twitched. "George, if you happen to see your son, make sure to mention that the princess arrived safe in Carthak."
"Wasn't part of the point of the visit to separate those two?" Gary asked, as he delicately picked through a fruit bowl.
George shrugged. "If you're worried about my lads and your lasses, it's the brainy daughter and the scholar son I'd watch. Nora has plots and plans for the country and for Thom, mark my words."
"I thought Nora was flirting with Alan?" Jon asked, looking honestly confused. Had it really been so long since he and Gary were participating in the social rituals of balls and flirtations?
"As a cover, so she could flirt with Thom." Thayet said. "Though I think the cover did fool Lianne. Which leads to a good point. Are we going to arrange marriages outside of Tortall for all of our children?"
Jon sighed. "Well, Nora won't really permit it, will she? Maybe we could send her to a convent to be a daughter of the Goddess for a while."
Gary smirked. "She's too old and set in her ways. They won't take her now."
"What news does your father send us?" Thayet asked.
"Just that it's a delight to have a lively young person clattering through Naxen again." Gary finally held up a plum. "This from Olau?"
"Yes, Myles sent sacks of the best from his orchard." George replied. "I'm not a noble born, but if you'll let me make an observation?"
"George, there's no need for that kind of formality when it's just us. What do you think?" Thayet asked, solemn eyes meeting solemn eyes.
"It's all well and good to make peace with our neighbors, but it wouldn't harm anything to make some peace at home. For the most part, Tortallans are open-minded folks. They don't always treat the Bazhir as they should, maybe, but they're not often cruel to foreign folk. Yet if you set up alliances with the Yamani Isles, Carthak, Galla, the Copper Isles, Maren and Tyra, folks are going to start to wonder what's wrong with the folks in our own country. I'm not saying Nora should marry my Thom—may the gods help us all if she do. And I'm not saying that sweet Lia ought to wed one of my lads, for all that she got so fond of Alan while they were in Maren. But if the girls are in love with some young fellow of the Court, what harm if one or two ally themselves with noble houses within these borders?"
Jon rubbed his face. "You're right." He mumbled. "I've concentrated so much on foreign affairs I hadn't thought that people might wonder what's wrong with Tortall."
Gary nodded. "There's a logic to it when you say it like that. I just never heard anyone process it that way before."
"Then you, my lads, don't spend enough time in inns and bars mingling with the common folks." George teased.
"With my face on every coin, I don't think that's a good idea." Jon said simply.
"Me? I don't leave the palace anymore unless my wife reminds me." Gary grinned after he swallowed the last of the plum.
Thayet shook her head. "So, Alan to Lianne." She said, nodding as if terms had been drawn and signed. "But what about Nora?"
"I think that directing some of her considerable energy toward studying Maren would be a wise way to go." Jon said thoughtfully. "We'll ask her to research it on her sister's behalf. If we're lucky, and I have a feeling we may well be, she'll become fascinated with the country. If she falls in love with the place, then she'll agree to marry the young prince Lia didn't particularly like, even if he is a bit thick."
"Jon, do you really think she could be happy like that?" Thayet protested.
"Nora is happiest when she has a finger in every pie." Gary pronounced. "Lia told us that if she marries the Maren man, he'll retreat to the library and leave her to run the country. Nora would be in her element with such a large prosperous country."
"Well, anyway, it's an idea." George said. "Just ask her to study it. Send her a few books. If she likes it, she'll ask for more. If she doesn't, we think of another idea."
"Very sensible. Thank you, George." Thayet stood and shook out her skirt. "Now, we have thirty minutes to get to the temple of Mithros to close this festival. Then, we must write letters to Buri and Lianne and Kalasin. Have we a courier worthy of trust?"
"I mistrust that gleam in your eye, my lady." George said. "What are you thinking?"
"Why don't we ask Raoul to take the letters to his wife? Raoul and his godson, his soon-to-be squire?" Thayet grinned.
Gary sighed. "It's official. She's begun to scheme and match make. The Gods help us all, before you know it she'll be introducing my son to some little lass and signing a marriage contract when my back is turned."
"Oh, stop exaggerating. Fifteen is plenty old enough for a romance, even if it is a bit young for a wedding." Thayet said.
"Who were you having a romance with at fifteen?" Jon teased his wife.
"Oh, you don't have to mind that." She grinned. "Besides, I've heard all about the romantic escapades of your youths." The queen sailed out of the room, still clutching Buri's letter.
"At least I know she won't put a frog in my bed over this." Jon commented to Gary. "It's her bed too, so it would be like punishing herself."
"Sire, if I were you, I would still sleep elsewhere tonight." Gary told his old friend. "Come on now George, what's the news with Aly?"
"My lass brought that blasted crow home from the Copper Isles and I'll never know a moment's peace until her mother either blows up at it or says hello like a kind woman." George adopted the mannerisms of a Player and sighed deeply. "It's really a shame that you can't freeze children at the age of say, seven and keep them loving and lovable forever."
Gary grimaced. He adored his own children, especially his little girls. "Maybe we should ask Numair to research that." He joked.
"It's too late now." Jon mumbled. "That I should live to see the day when my children court your children." He shook his head. "That's even more frightening than watching Lianne practice that stunt riding she's so fond of. When did we grow old?"
"Speak for yourself. At heart I'm still the same age as I ever was. It's just this body that appears older." Gary said. "We better follow her. Time to end the festival of Mithros and justice for the year."
Jon stood and squared his shoulders. "Thanks for getting the news here George." The king looked embarrassed. "And I am sorry that I spoke the way I did about your handling of Kalasin's troubles. It's just—I still think of her as the little pigtailed girl who followed Roald as though he were the sun and moon. It's hard to think of her as a wife and mother, because I wasn't there to see it happen. So I tend to overreact to bad news about her. I do apologize though."
"Lad, I've known you since you were a young sprite. I knew how you would react to this news and I don't blame ye. Now go and do your duty. Since the silencing spell is broken I can talk about the lass a bit more, later."
"Thank you." Jon said. He executed a crisp bow, turned and left the room. Gary bid George farewell more casually, trotting to keep up with the king. George sat at the table and gathered up Lianne's letter, smiling slightly. So there may yet be a chance for Alan to be happy. With Thayet on the side of the princess and the squire, there was a chance indeed. The father smiled, allowing himself a momentary daydream about a future filled with grandchildren and lazy days at the Swoop with his Lioness.
Notes to individual reviewers:
Jowa-Thank you so much for the compliment. I'm glad you like my writing. And "original idea"—my goodness, I'm blushing. :) I'm sorry I didn't update so quickly, but now that should improve.
Trickster666-Thank you for the compliments and the name suggestions! They're very well thought out and the website was helpful. I don't know how long I'll keep it going, but this is not the end. I promise at least three more chapters and a related vignette. I'm really glad you're enjoying this. Thanks for saying you're enjoying my writing style and the way I think out the characters. I'm honored that you think so.
Starrika-Thank you for the compliment about characterization. It's one of the areas I think about a lot as a writer, so I'm glad I'm succeeding.
Lady Silvamord—Wow!! You are my best reviewer. I'm sorry the update was so long in coming, but THANK YOU for your persistence and interest in this story. Thanks for the name and twin suggestion too. All I can say is "we'll see." I'm glad you enjoyed chapter 4. I'm sorry Kalasin and Kaddar aren't in chapter 5, but they didn't want to come out to play until chapter 6. You're right, Kalasin does have a streak of mischief in her. It hasn't shown itself lately because she's had her company face and manners on for four years straight. Don't worry, her sister will help her remember how to relax. Lianne's going to make it her mission to help Kalasin and Kaddar stop being polite to each other all the time and have some fun. Thank you again for your encouragement.