Mickey8th March

I'm home again. It's cool. Mum has been so much happier. Well not happier but less angry and nicer to me. She is making sure I'm happy which means more than she realizes.

I still haven't been able to see Josh but I've been able to talk to him on the phone and mum knows. Amazingly she is ok with it. Which is good but she hardly knows anything about him. I think she would reconsider if she found out he is seventeen. I think she thinks he's my age not two years older.

I asked dad if he would teach me how to play ice-hockey. Unfortunately he said he couldn't because he can't remember how and he doesn't want to make a fool of himself. I don't mind, I'll just have to get Josh to teach me. He is really good I'm sure.

Uncle Weis (Weisman) has been talking about doing some self defence training after what happened the other week. It should be fun but I don't really see the point seeing as though I'm ok but it will mean less time being annoyed by Natalie.

She's been acting weird lately. She's always asking how to get a boyfriend and stuff like that. It is so funny. I might help her later but I can't be bothered at the moment and if she starts getting a boyfriend now she'll probably get into the wrong group of people and that will backfire on me because I will be "the bad example" and it will be my fault.

Tonight we're going to Nadia and Weisman's for dinner. They have two kids, my cousins, weird. Katie is twelve a year younger than Nat and Matty who's eleven. It is so weird being the oldest. I'm so used to hanging out with seventeen, eighteen year olds. They seem so immature. It's frustrating. Mum said that a couple from work would also be there with their son Mitchell who's the same age as me. Well not really we're both fifteen but he turned fifteen in September last year so he's four months older. At least I will be able to talk to him. Unless of course he is just as bad as they are sure to be. He also has a little sister Hannah. She's ten and mum said she's really cute.

For some reason I think mum just likes little girls. Nat and I are too old and William is too little. We aren't at that cute age, the perfect age. I'm surprised she doesn't borrow her until she's grown up. Not that there's any more room in the house. We should move into a bigger house or the study should become my bedroom. That would be the best. No more wiggles. Hip Hip Hooray! I might start pleading now. It's a good time while she's in a good mood with me. I might ask her tonight. No I've got dinner, maybe tomorrow, in the morning. Hopefully I won't forget. I doubt I will but there's a first for everything.

I've started another diary. It has just got stuff about Josh in it. That way not everything in this is about Josh. I'm also writing poems and short stories in it. It also has pictures of Josh in it. It's cool.

Oh my god. Natalie wants to be a cheerleader. She is joining her years cheerleading squad. Hopefully I won't have to watch her. I was a cheerleader. It was so funny. We always chanted this thing from this movie 'Bring it on' it goes:

I'm Sexy, I'm Cute, I'm Popular to boot, I'm bitchin, great hair, the boys all love to stare. I want it, I'm hot, I'm everything your not, I'm pretty, I'm cool, I dominate this school. Who am I? Just guess! Guys wanna touch my chest. I'm rockin, I smiles, and many think I'm vial. I'm flying, I jump, you can look but don't you hump. Wow, I'm major, I roar, I swear I'm not a whore, we cheer and we lead, we act like we're on speed, hate us cause we're beautiful well we don't like you either, we're cheerleaders. We Are Cheerleaders.

I should piss her off by singing it. It will be so funny. I won't too soon. Not until I get the study as my room. Then it won't matter if I get her mad because I'll already have my room. If I have my own room I'll be able to put pictures of Josh on the wall. I have one on my bed head. It gets covered with my pillow because I didn't want mum to find out I had a boyfriend by finding a picture of him on my bed head. It doesn't matter know though because she knows.

Today William said my name. It wasn't exactly right but he never says anyone's name usually and it was so cute when he said it. Natalie was so jealous. That's one advantage of sharing a room with your baby brother. He learns your name quicker.

I'm getting hungry. I can't wait to go and have dinner. I think we'll be leaving soon. I better get ready just In case that's what mum thinks I'm doing.

I'll write to you soon. Speak to you then.

Love Alexa