Thursday morning Darry pulled Sodapop and me out of bed later than usual. At first I thought he must have figured we needed the extra sleep due to the fact that we all hadn't been sleeping much, but as I stood up I noticed his eyes. They were red and swollen from crying. That was the real reason he didn't want us to join him bright and early.
My heart sank, I had seen Darry and Sodapop cry everyday this week and I felt so helpless for not being able to mend their hearts. With less time than usually Sodapop and I scrambled to get ready for work and school. I ate a piece of toast for breakfast and nearly ran into Steve coming through the front door as I was going out to get the newspaper.
"Good news in the paper this morning!" Steve called out holding the item I was looking for in his hand. "Say's Bob Sheldon was likely killed in self-defense!" I pulled the paper out of Steve's hands and laid it on the dining room table. Darry and I read the short story together as Steve paraphrased it for Sodapop and Two-Bit. "Said Johnny and Ponyboy are still unaccounted for and they are believed to have left the state. Also sound's like the socs who were there are going to testify that they provoked the fight that lead to the stabbing." Steve reached onto the table and ate a dry biscuit left out from the night before. "If ole'Dally knows where they are I sure hope he let's them know they're about in the clear."
"That's right!" Two-Bit agreed. "It aint right. Those two hiding out somewhere when they don't have to." My brother's and I couldn't agree more, but no one had any idea how to get Dally to agree with all of us.
I climbed into the backseat of Steve's car to ride to school but I wasn't too excited to be heading back to classes. I hadn't really been there all week and being Ponyboy's sister I didn't feel too safe with all of the feuding between the greasers and the socs. As the scenery passed by the window my mind wandered to the night before. So many of my kind were ready to jump Cherry Valance without good reason. I feared a group of socs could easily do the same to me. Two-Bit and Steve must have been thinking the same thing because they walked me to my locker and first class, just to be safe.
When the bell rang to start first hour the teacher, Mr. Bellvin, gave the class assigned busywork and then called me out into the hall. "Miss Curtis," He began and looked over the top of his bifocal lenses at me. "I haven't received one lick of homework from you all week and tomorrow is the chapter test." I looked around at the floor, the lockers and my shoes, but didn't provide an answer. "Uh hem!" Mr. Belvin called for my attention. "Chemistry is not just something you can guess at, you had better go home tonight and get the work done that is due. If you don't there is no way you will be able to keep you're 'A' average."
"Yes sir," I muttered simply without further promises and he allowed me back into class. It wasn't the only time I had to mutter those words. Both my second, third and fourth period teachers took me aside to let me know how badly my grades were slipping. By lunch time I could barely think straight. My head was confused and about to explode with all the work I needed to do then I thought of Ponyboy. Just the thought of his name made me want to fall to my knees and stay crippled in sorrow. I knew that I would never be any good to anyone or myself till someone found him and brought him home.
On my way to the parking lot to join the boys for lunch I wandered back to my locker first. In the chaos of the halls I thought about how far behind Ponyboy was going to be in his school. With our dreams of scholarships fading Darry's disappointing words and yelling flooded my thoughts. I didn't want to have to hear all of that, I just wanted my brother back. I pulled open the door to my locker and started to stuff in the books I was going to need to get caught up on my schoolwork. The weight of the assignments was unbearable and the reality of it all set in while hot tears of frustration flooded my eyes.
I knew I had to leave the school before anyone saw them. Angrily I shoved my full knapsack back into my locker and ran down the steps and out the side door. I spent the first few blocks sobbing and walking away from the direction of my waiting friends. Just above a whisper I spoke out loud cursing myself, then Dally and Pony and Darry. In my anger I walked fast and to nowhere particular till a thought crossed my mind and stopped me in my tracks. 'I'll just go get him!' Without hesitation I made up my mind that I wasn't going to wait for Ponyboy any longer. He was lost and I was going to set out on the biggest journey of my life to go and find him.
I sat down on the curb and thought about what I would have to do and where I would have to go. At first I figured Texas was the best place to start looking because maybe Dallas was right…DALLAS! Not the city of course, the man! All I had to do was track Dallas and in time he would lead me right to my brother! Now there were just a few people I had to tell how much I loved so they wouldn't have to worry about me while I was gone.
I wandered through the streets of Tulsa to the entrance of the graveyard. I took a long pause before stepping in. In all of these months I had never returned to my parent's graves. Perhaps because the cemetery was far from home, or perhaps the reunion would have been far too painful. I wasn't sure which, but I knew I would find out.
Looking around I saw the sun was starting it's decent to the horizon and it was already late afternoon. I hurried inside the gates and realized I had been so upset the day of the funeral that I had no idea where my parents were buried. I was unsure if I would even be able to find my parents amid the other stones, trees and confusing winding roads. Having skipped out of school I had nothing better to do then search, so I did.
All I remembered was the small hill Darry and I walked down to his truck and a large tree, but the vast area was full of those. I walked the roads waiting for something to help me find my parent's resting place. After a few laps with no luck I decided to walk amidst the stones and look for my name. It must have taken an hour for me to notice the small, flat gray stones marked, CURTIS.
Falling to my knees I ran my fingers over the letters M A R G A R E T. Her name looked wrong since everyone called her Maggie. Leaning forward I wrapped my arms around the stone and held my eyes shut tight hoping to hear her voice, praying she would return to me for just a moment. I waited as the winds blew my hair across my face, but nothing happened. No voices and no apparitions. I lifted my head and looked at her name again. I needed to tell her I was leaving to go find my brother but all I could do was weep and cry out. "Momma! Why can't you come back? I need you to be here for me… please God just let her come back." I sobbed and leaned back down to caress the chiseled letters on the top of the stone.
Turning my head I looked at my father's marker. I reached over and touched the raised letters in his name, D A R R E L L C U R T I S. I continued to weep as I cried out into the wind and pounded on his stone grave. "Daddy, you got to come back. Darry can't do this alone." I picked my head up and looked around hoping to find my father, standing by the nearby tree, playing hide and seek they way he often did. All I saw were the branches blowing in the strong Oklahoma wind.
I sat with my parents talking to them as if they could somehow hear me. "Everything has been just horrible without you. I just about died, Soda has a broken heart, Darry and Ponyboy got into an argument and now Pony and Johnny are accused of killing this boy … can you believe that? See though, it was all in self defense but Ponyboy doesn't know that and he's been missing all week. Don't worry though, I'll find him… if I have to die trying." I breathed in deep attempting to calm myself. "Nothing is gonna get better till we see him again, and Darry is just miserable. I've never seen him this way."
The cool wind picked up speed and dropped in temperature. I pulled my red hooded sweatshirt closer to my body. As I laid in the cemetery small puddles of tears landed on the cold stone rocks that now represented my parents. "Life is nothing like it was when you two were here. I know you know how much Darry has done for all of us, and we just slow him down and somehow find ways to make his life hard and miserable." Guilt filled my senses as I remembered what a burden I was to my brothers. I closed my eyes to hold back a few tears. "Oh mamma…" I muttered and inhaled deeply. I let my eyes stay shut for a long while hoping to hear her voice and struggling to remember her face.
Something wet dropped onto my cheek then nose and ear. I lifted my hand and brushed the irritant away. The trouble double, tripled then a loud crack of thunder shocked my system and fully woke me. I pushed myself to a sitting position and looked to the sky as dark gray thunder clouds loomed above. Thunder cracked again and the soft rain turned to a downpour. Springing to my feet I looked for suitable shelter but could only find the nearby oak tree.
I ran over and huddled close to the trunk as the water seeped past the half foliated branches. I zipped my sweatshirt shut and pulled the hood over my wet head. Glancing toward the stone markers I recognized my brother's name. 'Oh glory!' I thought. 'I have no idea what time it is and Darry is going to be livid when he finds out I skipped school'. I knew I had to get home soon.
My eyes strained through the storm noticing the front gate to the cemetery off in the distance. I took off at the full run through the grass and mud on my way to the cobblestone road. I was halfway to the gate when a faint light glowed behind me through the raindrops and I heard the horn. Twisting to see behind me I noticed headlights from an old truck while the rain poured down. I stepped off to the side of the road so the vehicle could pass. Slowly it crept closer and stopped alongside of me. I didn't recognize the truck or the driver as he slid across the vinyl seat and pushed the passenger door open for me.
"Come on, get in!" A young man's voice yelled out the open door. My mind spun through the thoughts that I didn't know this boy, but continuing to stand in the cold blowing rain wasn't my favorite option either. I climbed into the truck cab and pulled the door shut. The rainwater ran down my face and I noticed the puddles forming on the floor and seat from my dripping wet clothing. I used my soaked shoulders to clear the water from my eyes and turned to my left. Two wide, round crystal blue eyes stared in my direction. The boy's long blond bangs fell in wet strips in front of his eyes. "Looks like you got caught in the storm too."
"Yeah I guess so." I must have looked nervous as I glanced over my shoulder in the direction I had come from.
"So what were you doing here?" His soft southern drawl called my attention back to him.
"Huh?"
He smiled again and his eyes sparkled. "What brings you to the cemetery on a Thursday afternoon?"
A friendly smile bent my lips as the sound of the beating rain echoed off the metal roof. "Just visiting, and you?"
"Just workin'." The young man cocked his head and brushed his bangs away from his eyes. "My names Owen Jasper."
"Nice to meet you." I replied and tucked wet tuffs of hair behind my ears. "I'm Scout Curtis."
"Scout?" Owen asked and pointed towards me. "I thought I knew you! You're in my European History class. You always sit in the front." I sized up the boy wondering if sitting in the front of the class was a good or bad part of my character. I was still trying to decide when he continued. "Come to think of it you weren't in class today."
His words reverberated trough my mind and I became aware of the fact that I was on my way home. "What time is it?"
Owen looked at his watch. "Almost six o'clock… are you ok?"
I felt my eyes widen and my mind panicked as I realized I had wandered away at lunch time and no one knew where I was. I calculated that Darry would be home soon cause of the rain and I didn't want to be late and cause further family trouble. "I … I gotta go."
I was about to open the door and jump back into the rain when Owen grabbed my hand. "Whoa! You can't go back out there you'll get soaked and catch pneumonia." I paused and took in his perfect smile as he turned the truck key. "How'bout I drive you home."
I blushed a little and was grateful for his kindness. "That would be great, thank you."
Owen put the truck into gear and the engine revved up and shuddered as the gear took hold. "So … you never said what brought you out to the cemetery today."
"I don't know." I said absently as the windshield wipers thumped back and forth. I was still thinking about how much I missed my family.
"You don't know?" Owen laughed and waited for a better response from me.
"My parents are buried here. I kind of came to see them."
Owen pulled the truck to a stop at the cemetery gate as thunder rolled across the sky. "Oh that's right. I'm sorry to hear that."
I looked at him and furrowed my brow. "How do you know my parents?"
"I don't know them. I just remember …" Owen stopped his thought.
I turned toward the boy. "Remembered what?"
"Nothing really. I just remember about your parents passing away."
Owen didn't want to tell me he had been there when the grave was dug and prepared for them so he awkwardly changed the subject. "I read about you in the paper after you and your friend were shot by her father." Owen halted at a stop sign, looked over at me and spoke empathetically. "Then today at school I heard your brother's still on the run even though he and his friend probably killed Bob Sheldon in self-defense."
I couldn't deny that it was probably hard for my peers not to know about me considering the year's events. Disappointed in the past and the troubles in my present I looked down toward my feet and spoke quietly. "Yeah. That's me and my family."
Owen looked my way with sympathy in his eyes. "I didn't mean to make you feel bad. … Listen, I bet it'll all be ok Scout. Just you wait." I looked over at the confidence in his face just as the bright sunset began to shine on the outside of the storm cloud. Owen pointed to the sky. "Lookie there. See even after the worst storms something beautiful can happen."
While we drove I looked into to the sky and watched a faint rainbow begin to shine with ever growing intensity. I thought of Ponyboy and how much he loved to stare off into the sky. If he was at home and he saw the display he would have called me to the porch or yard and we would have stared into the sky enjoying the rainbow together till it faded away.
Owen spoke again with excitement and pulled the truck over to the side of the road. "It's a double rainbow. Look at the second arc forming just above the first one, beautiful isn't it?"
I looked out the front window at the colors paralleling each other and sighed. "It really is." We spent a minute admiring the beauty and I thought about my two parents. Maybe there was a heaven and maybe that rainbow was them.
Owen continued on and drove me home and insisted on dropping me off at the front door to my house. I had preferred he stop a block away to give me time to formulate a story to explain why I was late, but his manners wouldn't allow him to do that. Stopping outside my house Owen looked my way. "I'll see you at school tomorrow?"
I deviantly smiled back and lied, "I'll see you tomorrow." I climbed out and walked around the front of the truck to the fence gate. When Owen pulled away I noticed Kathryn's father's car across the street. I breathed a sigh of relief, thankful Kathryn was here to keep Darry from yelling at me as I wandered inside.
No one was in the living room when I entered. I kicked off my wet shoes and called for Sodapop. "So? Are you home?" He didn't answer, but the sound of footsteps was heavy in the hall as Sodapop, Darry, Kathryn and Kathryn's father emerged from the back of the house.
"Scout? Where have you been?" Darry walked toward me and asked without anger. "You're soaking wet!"
"I was at the cemetery. I went to visit mom and dad and got caught in the storm." I said and tried to keep my eye contact away from Kathryn and her father. I was a little embarrassed to be standing before them in my old wet clothes.
"Oh… next time you want to go there just ask. You know Soda or I will drive you there." Darry said quietly. Apparently he didn't know I had skipped out of school. "Why don't you go get some dry clothes on while I finish speaking with Mr. Ottavi."
I looked up briefly to greet Kathryn and her father before I headed to my room. Sodapop chose to come along with me and when we could talk in private I asked. "What is Mr. Ottavi doing here?"
Sodapop flopped down on his old bed in my room. "He came by to tell Darry he'd be willing to help us out anyway he could with the Ponyboy thing. Says he talked with the chief of police and according to witnesses Ponyboy didn't have one lick of nothing to do with the killing, it was all Johnny."
My mouth fell open as I pitifully thought of poor Johnny getting the whole rap. "yeah but it was still self defense for Johnny right?"
Sodapop twitched the corner of his cheek in disappointment and shook his head. "Mr. Ottavi aint sure how the law is gonna see it. Says they aren't saying nothin about charges till they get a chance to talk with Johnny about his side of the story."
"Well that's just bull!" I said angrily, "we all know Johnny wouldn't ever do something like that if he didn't have a good reason too."
"I know!" Sodapop said trying to calm my anger. "You don't have to tell me that. Soda got a grave look of concern in his eye. "Ponyboy and Johnny better get home soon, or they're just gonna be in a lot more trouble."
I looked past my brother to a picture on my wall that Ponyboy had drawn in pencil a few years ago. It was me and Pony swinging on the tire swing together. "Don't worry Soda, he'll be home soon." I said then kicked him out of my room so I could change my clothes.
Mr. Ottavi was kind enough to treat my brothers and I to dinner at Tony's Pizzeria. Soda and Darry were shocked to see me devour three slices of pizza. They didn't know what to think as I ate what I assumed would be my last meal with them in a very long time.
Late in the evening the Ottavi's dropped us off at home and I went straight to my room to sort through my thoughts. I knew Dally would soon be in contact Ponyboy and I wanted to be there when he did. I knew the only way for that to happen was to stay close to Dally, real close. So I pulled out a notebook and wrote a letter of explanation to my brothers. The last thing I wanted was for them to worry about where I was or why I had left. Before I went to sleep I set my alarm clock for an early morning hour then I walked out to the living room to say good night, and goodbye. "Hey Darry," I said and stood by him to draw his attention away from the bill he was reading. "I'm going to go to bed."
"Ok, goodnight." Darry said without looking at me.
"I want you to know something. I really appreciate everything you have done for me since mom and dad died." My voice grew a little unsteady and I tried to stay composed. "You have never let me down… I just wanted you to know that and to know how much I love you!"
My words grabbed Darry's attention, and he put the bill down on the coffee table and looked up to me. "Scout is everything ok?"
I smiled and sniffled back more tears. "Yeah, I just miss Pony a lot right now. I'd been thinking about him and how I never bothered to tell him how much I loved him. So I want to be sure I tell you and Soda."
From Dad's chair Sodapop heard the conversation, turned the radio down and walked to my side. "Scout… Ponyboy knows how much you love him, so do Darry and I."
I turned to Soda and seeing his face only weakened my resolve to stay composed. "Thanks So. I love you so much, I just didn't want to go another minute without letting you know that." I looked to both of my brothers. "I am so proud of both of you for working so hard to keep us all together." I wrapped my arms around Sodapop and hugged him tighter than I usually did. I kissed his cheek and told him goodnight. Then I did the same to Darry, told them both, "Don't worry too much about me, I'll be fine." Assuming I was just speaking in general terms the boys told me to have a good night and I headed off to bed.
Author's note: In case I haven't said it enough I'll say it again- thank you so much for all of your reviews and for enjoying and reading these stories! These next few chapters will certainly be the hardest for me because I will be working to mix Scout in with the book. It's not my normal style to do so, but I have gotten to a point where I'm just gonna have to!
I hope you all enjoy as Scout journey's further into the pages of S.E. Hinton's The Outsiders novel. I will try my best to make it well worth the read!