Haunted
By: Junsui Kegasu
A/N: Kyah! Due to coaching from dearest Shu-chan, (H-R to us ff.n hobos) I have started this chapter while writing LaF! I've wanted to do this for a while; I do realize that was a horrible cliffie…so…yeah…
Ugh! I want to answer someone's constructive criticism, but I CAN'T thanks to ff.n! Grr…I shall say this: He is not open in public, too much; just within the group he knows he's safe with and therefore taunts them with it.
Disclaimer: Do I look like I own Naruto? …Oh, wait, you can't see me. ….HA! KANKY-CHAN SAYS SO, TOO! I'm not a 31-year-old Japanese man. …I'm a 13-year-old girl with the mental capacity of a fish.
'Oh, shit, oh, shit, oh, fucking, shit!' Gaara thought, standing rooted in his spot in the middle of Kankurou's living room. 'He knows, he knows, he knows, he knows!'
"Gaara-" Neji started, only to be cut off.
"YES?"
He raised an eyebrow. "Are you okay?"
"M-mhm! P-perfectly f-fine!" was his reply, but his voice felt very high pitched and false.
"…Are you sick? That's usually why you drag your ass over here." Did he suspect something? Was it a crime to visit a friend?
"What, is he not aloud to visit me? C'mon, now, Neji, I've known the kid since he was 5. He's my best friend, no, no, practically my brother!" Kankurou's voice, too, Gaara noted, was cracking and sounded kind of false, and he realized they both had the same fear.
Now, both eyebrows were cocked. "…So that's the only reason he's here is to visit you?"
"God, what else would he be here for, sex? Ha…ha…ha…HA!" Kankurou tried to laugh it off, but he couldn't exactly ignore his penis at the thought.
"Actually, I wasn't thinking quite that far, but you two seem to be very…close. Beyond friendship." Neji's voice was slow and suspicious sounding.
"Well, you're right there, Neji, 'c-c-cause w-we're practically s-siblings!" Gaara piped up, putting a hand behind his head and forcing a sheepish grin onto his features.
Neji glared at him for a long, sweating moment, trying to find a lie anywhere. Apparently satisfied, he grabbed Gaara's arm and tugged him to the door.
"Let's go," he said simply, twisting the knob and dragging Gaara (who had gotten over himself and was now following) with him.
Kankurou stared at the empty room sadly, closing the door, before slumping onto the couch and putting his head into his hands. He really needed some time to figure out what had just gone on.
Gaara had responded, hadn't he? He liked it, hadn't he? So, how wrong could it be? He knew the answer to that immediately: It was wrong because Gaara was with Neji.
'But Neji doesn't deserve someone as…as…as Gaara as him!' a little voice protested.
Even his thoughts couldn't describe Gaara. He just…was. There was no describing how utterly forgiving and kind he was, perhaps a little too trusting and gullible, but all at the same time, he was just Gaara.
Did Neji see that too? Or…(he paled at the thought out of rage, worry, and disgust) did the longhaired boy only want Gaara for his body? There was no denying that Gaara was good looking, with his fine crimson locks, fair, probably unhealthily pale skin, and gorgeous jade orbs that shimmered like diamonds with emotion he was no good at hiding.
…Okay, he needed a bathroom break. What was wrong with him? He hadn't felt like this since middle school!
The ride back to Neji's apartment had started off silent. Finally, as well as surprisingly, it was Gaara to break the mood, his hands folded in his lap and his gaze locked there.
"N-neji?" he mumbled, getting the older man's attention. When he gave a grunt of acknowledgement, Gaara continued. "I-I'm sorry f-for leaving…b-but…I l-left a note…" he trailed off, not trying to make it seem like it was Neji's fault.
"Yeah, I know. I got it. And quit your stuttering, it's pathetic!" Neji snarled at him, glaring from the corner of his eye before letting it dart back to the road.
Gaara shrunk in his seat, mumbling an apology.
"Shut up! If you can't talk right, don't talk at all!" he continued, raising his voice. "I know you did something over there with Kankurou! You filthy slut, always going after other people, aren't you?"
Gaara didn't hear the rest of Neji's insults or rants; his mind was busy down memory lane. It wasn't a far trip, just to last night, but one enough to send him back down a spiral of depression.
"Oh, god, Gaara…" Neji panted, keeping still for a moment to get used to being in the redhead.
Pain. That's all there was to this. But the look on Neji's face was enough to make his heart soar – he finally found something to make Neji happy.
Neji had been happy with him…he hadn't screwed up…
'"Don't worry…it'll get better…"'Wasn't that what Neji had said at Gaara's involuntary whimper of pain? It wasn't really getting better at all, but Neji looked so happy pounding him into the mattress, moaning loudly, his face contorted with pleasure, that he couldn't bring himself to say anything about it. He wouldn't have anyways.
Neji didn't even notice the lack of moaning from the body pressed beneath him.
He had finally been put to some good use…he thought that maybe…just maybe…Neji would love him now. Isn't that what he had said?
"G-gaara!"By now, there had been enough pleasure involved, after finally getting used to having Neji in him without being lubricated or stretched, to let him moan, but there was some blood dripping down his thighs. He didn't care.
"Oh, god, Gaara, I love you!"
I love you.
I
Love
You
Those three words…hadn't they always been all he had wanted to hear? As Neji came to a shuddering climax, he felt something fill him. Still in his euphoria of being loved, Gaara also released, but all over Neji, who, for once didn't care that he had made a mess.
Tears filled his eyes. He tried to stop them, but one lonely bead of crystalline pain streaked down his pale cheek. Neji had said he loved him…why had Neji lied? Neji didn't love him…if he did, he wouldn't be yelling at him…he wouldn't have kissed Kankurou if Neji loved him…
"Yeah, that's right, bitch, cry! That's all you are: a selfish crybaby!" They had been stationary for a while in the parking lot of the apartment, but Neji was still verbally assaulting him. This time, there was nothing to keep his mind off it.
He felt hollow inside, now, like instead of loving him last night, Neji had robbed him of something. Did he have anything left?
"Get out of the car," came a menacing growl. "What the fuck are you, deaf?" He must have been able to tune Neji out. Feeling more than empty, Gaara stepped out of the car, gently shutting the door behind him, and slowly started the trek upstairs to Neji's apartment.
When they were on the stairs, Neji lost his already wavering patience. "Can't you go any faster?" He checked the hallways, and when he was assured no one was around, moved in front of Gaara and wrenched the arm that had been slack on the railing and dragged him up the remaining flights of steps.
Gaara hardly noticed, or cared, when the pain in his arm started to blossom. He didn't hear Neji slam the door to his apartment behind him, or feel him start to hit him, across the face, chest, arms, anywhere.
This was apparently displeasing. Neji obviously wanted him in pain, so he became harsher, slamming his fist into the side of the redhead's skull. Gaara saw stars and felt very dizzy; the stitches he had needed to get because of Neji's most recent drunken outburst hadn't quite healed enough to have them taken out. Temari said she and Shikamaru would call him when the time came.
The last thing he remembered was Neji pushing him to the floor and slamming his sneaker-encased foot down on his chest before he blacked out. His last thought echoed in his skull:
Why can't I be enough…?
Kankurou spent the rest of the day on the couch, still in his pajamas. He couldn't tear his thoughts away from Gaara. The younger man was just so…perfect to him. It was almost unreal.
A wry smile crossed his face. If he were to ever tell Gaara he was perfect, he knew the response he'd get immediately:
"Ah, I'm not perfect, Kankurou! I-I'm short, a-and fat…an-and I stutter…"Gaara could be so self-criticizing. Neji didn't help that at all, telling him he was fat and insulting him every ten seconds. Couldn't he tell that Gaara took everything to heart?
Suddenly, the phone rang. Kankurou started, not expecting to be snapped out of his thoughts, but searched around for the machine, finding it on its fourth ring buried under a pile of blankets.
"Hello?"
"Hi! Kankurou?" a woman's voice came from the other side. It sounded very familiar, very jumpy, enthusiastic, and kind.
"Kasuka-san! It's nice to talk to you!" Kankurou was very surprised to hear the voice of Gaara's mother on the line. The truth was, he hadn't seen or talked to her since Neji's birthday party.
"Yeah, I haven't seen or heard from you in a while!" she said, cheerfully. "But, actually, I was wondering about Gaara…I kind of lost the number to where he and Neji-kun live…and the address…and I wanted to visit him. The last time I saw him, he wasn't looking all that well…a lot thinner than normal and kind of sickly…I'm worried."
"Oh! Yeah, this winter's been kind of hard on him…he just got over being sick, actually." Kankurou decided to omit the fact that he had needed stitches from a head wound his boyfriend gave him.
"Oh…yeah…poor him with his immune system! I found some medicine for that, actually, but I remembered that Gaara developed a certain…reject instinct for pills, so I can't give them to him…" she said sadly. "But I still wanted to see him! You'd think by now I'd remember the number, but I guess not! Kind of funny, really, the last time I talked to him was his birthday! My little baby's all grown up…"
Kankurou let the woman rant on about her child for a while; it was what Kasuka did. Before Gaara, she had been unfortunate enough to have several miscarriages, but she had wanted a baby so bad, even though the doctors had told her that the chances of her giving birth to a healthy child were very slim. While Gaara could be considered 'healthy' by a doctor's standards, Kankurou considered him kind of vulnerable.
After a moment, Kasuka sighed, signaling the end of her musings. "Well, Neji's number is XXX-XXXX," he told her, somewhat cheerfully. "And his address is room 703 in the apartment building on Harvard Blvd."
"Thanks Kankurou! We should try to get together sometime…I haven't talked to your parents in ages!"
"Yeah…they're enjoying retirement very much…" Kankurou told her. In truth, he hadn't seen his parents in over a year. He felt kind of guilty, but Temari kept him up to date, seeing them every other week or so. Every time she had asked him to come, work had hindered him. He decided he should pay them a visit on his days off.
Bidding Kasuka good-bye, Kankurou hung up the phone and plopped back onto the couch, ready for a nap on its lumpy cushions.
Neji looked over from where he was surfing the Internet when the phone rang. He reached over and grabbed the portable device, pressing the 'talk' button.
"Hello?" he asked as politely as possible. In truth, he was still feeling a lot of anger towards Gaara. He just knew he had done something!
"Hey there! Uh…Neji-kun?" the voice belonged to a very eccentric sounding woman.
"Speaking," he drawled absently, clicking a link to Yahoo! Games.
"Hey! This is Kasuka! Um, is Gaara available?"
Oh, great, her. Neji found this woman to be very annoying and her visits were always so loud. He didn't dare tell her that Gaara was sprawled out on the living room, unconscious, and maybe with a couple broken ribs, but lied instead.
"He's sleeping. His insomnia has been acting up of late," he said smoothly, taking another glance over at the redhead in question to assure himself that he was still breathing.
"Ohh…I wanted to see him…he wasn't looking so well last time I talked to him, on his birthday. Is he doing okay?" she chirped pleasantly.
"Yes. He's absolutely fine, in perfect health." Neji replied, not much emotion in his voice.
"Ohh! Well, that's good! Um, do you know when I could see him next?"
Neji put on a falsely pleasant voice. "Ah, I don't know…his sleep pattern is so random, that I don't know when he'll be waking up." He knew the ditz would believe him. Gaara never slept any more than eight hours at a time, but she didn't know that.
"Oh, you're right…darn…I'll have to talk to him another time…Thanks, Neji!"
"No problem."
He hung up, threw the phone across the room, where it landed close to Gaara's head, and went back to the Internet.
When Gaara woke up, he at first didn't recognize his surroundings. Judging by the fact that his back was pressed achingly against something hard, he guessed he was on a floor. Who's, he wasn't sure.
He tried to force himself to move, but as soon as he made it to a sitting position, a pain lanced through his ribs so strong he was forced back down. Panting from the pain, he noticed the phone right by his head.
'Kankurou…'Kankurou's nap had cost him, as it was now 2:30 in the morning, and he had absolutely no chances of sleeping, he had come to realize. He was currently fixing himself something to eat. His meals hadn't been organized for a while now, and he just ate whenever he got hungry enough to go to the kitchen.
He was just piling some cheese into a tortilla shell when the phone rang. A feeling of dread came over him. Only one person would possibly call this early…He shoved the cheese-invaded tortilla shell into the microwave, hit the 'one minute' button, and went to answer the phone, swallowing hard.
"H-hello?" he said, nervously, already knowing who was on the other line.
"K-k-kank…'rou…" Gaara voice sounded from the other line. He sounded extremely weak.
"Gaara! Gaara, are you okay?" he asked, panicking.
"K-kanku…rou…I…c-can't m-move…"
He couldn't move? What was wrong?
"W-why can't you move…?" he asked slowly.
"M-my….ribs….hurt…" Gaara's voice sounded very strained, as if it was hurting him to talk. Had he broken something?
"Okay…Gaara, do you know if the door's unlocked over there?" He didn't care about Neji being there anymore, he was going to get Gaara out of there! If he couldn't move because of his ribs, which meant that something was probably broken, he wasn't going back until he could move again.
"I…d-don't thi-think…Neji…..l-locked it…..wh-when….w-we…came…home…" Gaara managed.
"Okay, Gaara, do not try to move until I get there, and don't talk too much, okay? I'm going to assume Neji's asleep – don't tell me, it's obviously hurting you to talk – and if the door's locked…Then…I'm not even going to think about that, okay? I'll be right there."
Click.
Kankurou didn't care at that moment that he was still in pajamas or that he wasn't showered. Grabbing his key ring from the counter, he quickly stopped to check something, feeling relief when he saw a key labeled 'Neji's' on it. Gaara had dropped it a while ago, and Kankurou kept forgetting to give it to him.
He practically sprinted to his car, determined to make it to Gaara as fast as possible.
And voila! Okay, this chapter isn't amazingly long…only just over seven pages…but that's okay!
OH! BEFORE I FORGET! Fantastical Queen Ebony Black, more widely known as Ebony-chan, wrote a poem inspired by Haunted! It almost made me cry, and it's beautifully written. To find it, go here:
h t t p / w w w . f i c t i o n p r e s s . c o m / r e a d . p h p ? s t o r y i d (equal sign – ff.n doesn't like them.) 1 9 8 8 6 4 4
Love you, Ebony!
Also, on another note, I'm back from vacation earlier than I thought I would be! Surprise surprise!