"Can I be the flower girl," Anita asked in her quiet, sweet little voice.
Surrian picked Anita up, stroking the child's long, blonde curls. "Of course you can, my dear."
Genkai huffed, "I'm walking you down the aisle, like it or not Rostov."
Kilala rubbed her head up and down Surrian's leg, purring.
"It looks as though Kilala wants to carry you in," Sango laughed.
Turning her head, Surrian muttered to her Soren, "Had to get the kids involved, didn't you?"
He gave her a kiss on her hair and smiled, "Let them help. They are dearest ones you know."
"I call dibs on helping you pick out a tuxedo!"
Everyone turned and gave a completely awed look to Hiei, who was still waving his hand frequently in the air.
Yusuke snorted, "I'll help get rid of the booze."
SMACK
"What! I'm not wearing a damn tux!"
"Actually...Soren won't be wearing a tux," Surrian said, still awed the little fire demon from Hell had just called dibs on something, "he's going to be wearing his God of War armor."
Raising an eyebrow, he gave her a look, "I...am?"
Chuckling, she leaned forward and whispered, "Trust me, you look so drop dead sexy in I may have to tackle you at the alter."
His eyebrow twitched uncontrollably. All he could mumble was, "Oh...oh, dear..."
"I'm not wearing a tux if the groom isn't!"
"YES YOU ARE," Genkai roared, tackling him over the back of the couch.
Surrian giggled immaturely, "Wear the horns. You know I love the horns."
When she giggled in his ear he passed out.
"Oh my God, you killed the groom!"
"No, I didn't," she muttered poking him with her cane, "he's still twitching."
"Now that's love," Sango laughed.
Kurama cleared his throat and everyone looked at him, "Ms. Surrian, what apparel would you care to see me in?"
Tossing back her head she cackled literally, "Nothing!"
Everyone did an anime fall.
He smiled politely, "As you wish."
Her eyebrow bugged out of her forehead almost, "Take it easy, fox boy."
Gabrie popped up from his pocket (to which no one was sure how he had gotten to) "NOOOO! MAKE HIM WEAR NOTHING! MAKE HIM DO LAP DANCES OR SLOW STRIP!"
The red head quirked his eyebrow at Gabrie, "Feisty little thing, aren't you," as he gently flicked him from his pocket.
As he was flying, Gabrie yelled, "I'll die happy!...Wait, I am dead...I CAN RE-DIE HAPPY!"
Surrian shook her head slowly, "Eh, anyways. We'll let Hiei pick out a tuxedos, and I already have a wedding planner on the way."
"OH NO HE DIDN'T! COME BACK HERE, BITCH!"
"And there he is," she chuckled, "Neth, dear?"
A stocky young man came waltzing in, spiky blonde hair up wildly and one good blue eye twinkling. "Hi Soren, are you still getting married to that really dumb blonde chick with the gigantic b-..."
The second he saw Surrian he screamed his head off, turned to run and ran head long into a wall.
"And that would be our wedding planner," Surrian said, now having two men on the ground twitching uncontrollably.
"We're all gonna die," Sango muttered, shaking her head.
"I think the boy fears you," Kurama said lightly, batting Gabrie off every time he jumped at him.
She prodded him with her boot and he immediately screamed, "EVVVVVVVVVVVVVILLLLLLLLLL!"
"Love you too, sweetheart."
He gave her a terrified look, stood, tried to run and hit the wall again. "Why are you here! Is the bride gonna die the second she steps off the alter our something."
Grabbing a random Bible, he whacked her upside the head in time for Soren to wake up.
"Neth, no," he yelled, "Surrian is my fiance'!"
The look he gave him was completely dumfounded. "B-But..."
Turning around, he tried to do the one thing that would more or less make his head implode if he did too much..
"Um, Soren + Surrian ?. Er, Shadows + War + um...Damnit! Soren + Surrian + war + insanity ?"
"Give him some time," Ghost whispered to them as she floated by, "it'll take him awhile."
"Wait, hold on. Soren + Surrian - Sarah ...Hold on, how does pimps go into the equation!"
Soren ran to his bride, nuzzling her wound tenderly, "I'm so sorry, are you alright my love? "
Surrian gazed about wildly, eyes spinning, "Yes, I'll have the mocha latte..."
Kagome laughed nastily from the bar, "Yeah? And I'll have a white Russian!"
"Can you stand," Soren asked quietly, giving her a look of deep concern.
"Da, da, I'm fine."
The second he let go she fell flat on her face.
Aden stumbled down the stairs, smiling happily as Aubrey dragged him.
"Get off!"
"I missed you so much, brother," he cried, latched on to Aubrey's arm.
"And we have our priest," he yelled down, struggling to get away. Yukina followed after him, still scratching down notes like crazy. "Oh, dear. Oh' my..."
Something muffled came from the twitching Russian on the floor.
Soren bent, picked her up and asked, "What was that love?"
"I think I broke my damn nose!"
Aubrey pointed and burst into hysterical laughter while Aden's hair got grays among the whites, "HOLD ON MS. SURRIAN! PRIEST ON THE WAY!"
He spring leaped off of his brothers head, over the stairwell, barreled past the little elf pirate still doing algebra and scratching his head and tackled her and Soren both.
"Don't touch me, I'm holy!"
Surrian twitched violently as he put his hands over her nose, mumbled something.
And, as simple as that, her nose was now pierced. "WHAT IN THE EIGHT CIRCLES OF HELL!"
Aubrey fell down the stairs he was laughing so hard. Yukina squealed and followed, making little note drawings to go with it.
The Russian shoved the priest off of her, muttering, "Godamn, that's bullshit..."
Her fiance' gave her a funny look; almost guilty.
She gave him a nasty look in return, "You're getting off on this, aren't you?"
Instantly, his hands were up like a shield, "I swear I'm not!"
"Godamn you Soren and your past history with pierced, tattooed demon concubines!"
" HELLO ! Can we plan the wedding now?" ask an impatient Botan as she stoked the head sticking out from her cleavage.
" Perrrrrrr, perrrrr" sang the little body of Sabrie.
After seven hours and forty two minuets of pain staking planning.
"So what about this one?" asked Sango as she opened the last wedding book.
" Alright that one is sexified." was the brides answer.
They had decided on a shimmering black gown, tied at the waist by a soft, almost auburn brown ribbon that kept the ruffled, layered waves of the skirts held in place perfectly for the bride's maids.
For Genkai, the passer, a midnight purple, Medieval habit including the silky jacket and the long, delicately patterned design.
Anita had a black dress with a tiny explosion of firework embroidery at the side of the waist. Near the end, a slit opened revealing a filmy white underskirt.
As for the bride, a gentle, ruffled white gown, short in the front and quite long in the back. On Surrian, the ruffles cam to about her knees in the front and the back was left in a long train. Of course, she had to have her top hat so she would make it white for the occasion and pin a black rose on it.
Kurama and another man would be growing the floral arrangements for her wedding. In fact, he should have been there already.
"Sango, have you seen-"
The door opened and shut quietly, "Good evening, everyone."
"Wee, Seth is here, Seth is here," the twins called, cuddling whichever intimate body they were close too.
"Calm yourself, ghost," Kurama said, shaking his head as he tried to pry Gabrie from his chest.
"Never!"
A tall, red haired man swept elegantly into the dark room. He was dark, he was mysterious and drop dead gorgeous with two emotionless green eyes that could give a person chills of delight by looking at them.
Beside him was a small, beautiful woman. White skinned, long, black hair and two compassionate honey golden eyes.
"Congratulations, on your betrothal," he purred, nodding his head lightly to Surrian.
Cyreina ran up and hugged her, "Oh, my yes. We were so delighted when we heard."
"Pardon me for a moment, "Seth whispered. He reached up underneath his top hat and unpinned his long, almost waist length hair
Meanwhile, somewhere inside Kurama, a very pissed off Youko was getting a bit pissy with his half brother.
"You bring me here and surround me with; a hot British guy, a dead sexy Russian psychopathic bondage queen, a cute, short innocent little raven hair, an innocent British priest, a really shy and polite groom, not to mention fucking twins! Now you're making me sit here and be quiet while some sexy red head undoes his hair and purrs at me!"
Kurama frowned, " I know your bi, but please. Try to restrain your sexual appetite!"
Seth swept over and gave him a slow, eerie smirk, "It would seem you and I are partners on the floral arrangements."
Youko howled inside of him, "I'm gonna tackle him!"
"No, you will not!"
That decision almost got contradicted as Seth bent and shook his hand. Cyreina followed, leaned down and gave him a long hug, "Pleasure to meet you."
"Yes, yes, lovely to meet you," he mumbled, pushing her back with a pained smile.
"Oh, bloody Hell," Seth griped, "my damn back."
Upon the confused looks, Cyreina smiled and said, "He has a bad back. Hold on sweetie, I'll give you a massage."
Hiei snorted with laughter.
Cyreina set her husband down on the floor and unbuttoned his shirt for him.
"NOOOO! HE'S NOT ALLOWED TO BE THAT SEXY," Youko yelled, crashing into the walls of Kurama's mind like crazy.
In the candlelight of the chandelier above, Seth's muscular body rippled with a fascinating display of shadows and light as Cyreina moved behind him.
"My poor baby," she cooed, "I wish I had some lotion to help it feel better."
Kurama twitched as he watched her massage Seth gently. Of course, it didn't help when she moved to his front, straddled her husband and rubbed his shoulders.
A sultry look came over the ring master's face as he leaned forward and plunged his fangs into her delicate throat.
"I...believe I need to leave for awhile," Kurama shakily mumbled as Seth's hands went to his wife's dress.
It was the last thing he needed to see the two of them getting frisky.
"It was heavenly meeting you," Cyreina called politely.
"Heavenly, indeed," Seth added, somehow managing to tear his fangs from his wife.
Youko beat his fists on the walls confining him, "YOU SUCK!"
As he moved his position he noted Surrian and Sango still configuring for her wedding dress.
"Ok, Surrian. I'll need your bust size. Here."
"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO," Youko howled as he watched Sango cup Surrian's chest.
"Ok, what size am I," the Russian purred, flipping through a bride's magazine.
"Ooh, I'd say you'd be about a 42 DD."
Kurama let out a small squeaking noise as Youko went running about in circles, screaming with lust.
"Where is my sister, by the way?"
Sango bent down to get a book, "She went up to change."
"Alright," Surrian said easily.
"Can you lower your shirt down for a second? I need some other measurements."
Kurama took off screaming before he could catch a glimpse of the bondage queen's chest.
Youko stomped his foot angrily, "Go back! Go back you son of a bitch!"
Shaking his head, he quickly went down the hall and flopped down on the couch.
Unfortunately, he didn't notice Soren was asleep there and ended up right up in his lap.
A hot blush crossed over Kurama's face as Soren's eyes fluttered open, "Hm?"
"I'm sorry, I didn't notice you sleeping there, I'm really sorry, I'm really, really sorry!"
"Ooh, he's a big one. Tackle him, quickly! You have him cornered, just tackle him!"
"BUT HE'S THE GROOM!"
"SO? HE'S SEXY AND BIG AND INNOCENT! SURRIAN WILL UNDERSTAND, NOW JUST TACKLE HIM!"
Soren stretched under him, yawning, "It's ok. Easy enough mistake to make."
Standing, he apologized again and again than ran off. "I need to get out of this house. This house is nothing but an orgy trap!"
Youko grunted and folded his arms, "Godamn, this is bullshit. Surrounded by the worlds' sexiest people and you won't even...grr!"
"You don't even know which one of them you want to take," Kurama yelled angrily.
"...One?"
"First I'm going to eat the bride, screw the groom, Devour the brides maids, fuck the made of honor, Rope the ring master wile I play with his little Russian, bone the twins. And if I have my way fuck Hiei in tell the house burns down and maybe the detective. Did I miss anyone?...Oh no I forgot the Brits.."
"OH HELL NO YOU ARE NOT COMING OUT!"
Kagome just happened to walk past in her bartender outfit that consisted of a black halter top that tied in the back. And a skirt that went to her thighs in the front and to her knees in the back.
"And now for a cold shower," he called, striding off while trying to drown out the insistent lust demon in his mind.
As Kagome entered the counter behind the bar, Surrian slid up on the counter and winked at her, "Soo...not telling me something?"
" Its nothing. SANGO your orders up."
"I'm not your big sister because I have bigger boobs you know."
"Yeah, well...I'll bet you paid for those monsters anyways," Kagome snapped, hurriedly mixing drinks.
Surrian cackled wickedly, "Oh, no. They were a milk and chicken breast diet installation, my dear."
"Well excuse me. I have work to do right now so..."
"Where is that doggie slave of yours?"
Kagome's eye twitched, "He's off with some godamn, dead, cold ass bitch, fucking made of clay, boning nothing but a bunch of dead chick's ashes, mother-"
The white Russian chuckled as her younger sister went on a binge rant until finally she nailed Neth in the head with a bottle of whiskey, screamed, than burst into tears.
Opening her arms, Surrian nuzzled Kagome as she hugged her and sobbed. "I-I just h-hate him so much!"
"Aww, sweetie."
Tilting Kagome's chin up, Surrian gave her a demented smile, "You forget, my kin, who your sister is."
The fact that her sister was a complete psycho loaded with an arsenal of highly powered, sugar driven bio weapons was slightly comforting.
"It's ok, dear. I'll skin him alive and make a comforter for you."
"You mean I can sleep on a dead Inuyasha," she asked, sniffling.
"Da, of course. I'll chop him up into little bits, flay his flesh and make a drum from it for a rock star, than turn his girlfriend into a bong to hold the rock star's pot."
Kagome smiled, "Thanks, Rostov. Can I help?"
"I'll let you sharpen my blades," her sister cackled, popping one of her mechanisms from her back and waving it comically.
"Kagome!"
As if irony could not be more of a bitch, in to the manor of crimson shadows stormed one dog boy and his dead girlfriend.
"What do you want," she yelled, shoving Surrian off the counter so she could see him.
Anger like nothing else filled her. Oh, she wanted Surrian to hurt him. She wanted to hurt him herself and burn Kikyo alive, while laughing hysterically at her cries of pain.
"Ohhh," the Rostov ripper said lightly as she stood, "so this is the doggie slave?"
One could almost say the room grew both darker and colder.
"That's right, bitch," he growled, "and I'm here to take Kagome back."
Soren stood, but with her snake like hypnosis, Surrian made him sit back down and watch helplessly as she encircled Kikyo with one arm.
"Allo, clay girl," she chuckled, giving her a shark like smile.
Kikyo remained silent, eyes on Inuyasha as he stormed to the bar.
"I need you to help me find the shards, so like it or not you're coming back."
Kagome gave him a nasty look, "Over your dead, stretched over a drum body, mutt."
He made to grab her but in the split second that the thought was executed, a rather tight grip shot from the shadows and latched on to his wrist.