A/N: Ack… so late. Sorry, I've been really busy lately. There was a vacation and I had a fun time home with the family. And with one chapter left after this I fear that too will be delayed. With midterms, this weekend I get to scare people in the Haunted Forest my campus is running. Heh, I got role of story teller. I get to lead people though the maze of the forest and tell them a story as we walk. "Well, you see there was this man Hiroko and he did weird experiments on people…" -sighs- I can see it now. Well after the forest my Aunt and I are leaving the state to watch another Breaking Benjamin concert. YAY BREAKING BENJAMIN! Then I'll be getting home just in time for Thanksgiving break. I'm really hoping to be a good author and post sometime in there… but I get sleepy and forget. -doges old fruit- I'LL DO MY BEST! STOP THAT! Beta reader is Nekotsuki!
Reviewers!
lolo popoki - I can't wait for this to be complete again either, I'm taking WAY too long reposting.
WolfDaughter - Keep reading to find out what happened to poor Reizo.
Shadow Wolf of the Blue Moon - Well… I would ask Reizo if he minded your comment. -pokes his body- But he can't respond at the moment. I can't tell if he's dead or horrified. -grin-
droparmor - Here you go, Kenshin! Eat up! -Uh… what is this?- Human! -O.ox-
Hitokiri Musei - Please don't through things at me. I try to update fast… when I remember too…
AuburnMoonlight - Yes, I'm hoping to have the second chapter of Violet Eyed Angel out the same day that I post the last chapter to this… depending on if my beta reader can get it looked over before then. She's been really busy so we'll have to see.
aznpuffyhair - You have to read the rest of the story to find that out!
Chapter 27 - I Am Who I Am; A Long Put Off Discussion
Kenshin's head pounded, but he gave a small smile for Neko. 'If Itsuo-sensei is here, then we must be at a safe house,' he concluded as he weakly attempted to sit up.
"Please, Himura-san, just rest. You lost a lot of blood," Itsuo said, reaching out as if he was ready to hold the teenager down if he wasn't going to listen.
Kenshin had no problem with the order. He gave up trying to sit up, and with a sigh closed his eyes, the dim light increasing his headache.
"Aw, he's going back to sleep," he heard Neko's voice whine.
"No I'm not." He reassured her by opening his eyes again to look over at Itsuo. "How long?"
"How long?" the doctor repeated, confused.
"How long was I out?"
"Oh. Well…" He began to count on his fingers. "I would say about four or five days, depending on how you want to count them. We were getting worried that we would have to force-feed you."
'Four or five days? And I still feel this weak?' Kenshin would be lying if he said he wasn't somewhat startled.
"And we don't want you getting out of bed for a while still." Itsuo practically glared at Kenshin. "So don't try to go wandering off." His face softened. "But if there is anything I can get you, you let me know."
"Water."
"Alright, I'll be right back." Itsuo stood and left the room
Kenshin waited until he couldn't hear Itsuo's footfalls, then he turned his head towards Neko, who sat staring at him, as if she couldn't believe he was alive. 'It must have been pretty horrible for her.' He felt a pang of guilt suddenly settle on his chest. "Neko?"
"Yes, Kenshin?" she answered quickly, scooting forward.
"Did those men hurt you?" She started to cry. 'They touched her,' Kenshin thought, assuming the worst. "Neko, what did they do?"
She started to shake as she tried to stop crying. "No, they didn't hurt me. They, they…" Kenshin waited for her to calm down so she could talk. "They just took me outside. They scared me and they kept making fun of you. Calling you bad names. Then, then, then you screamed." She broke down in tears again. "I was so scared. I didn't know what had ha-happened. Then Reizo came-"
'Reizo.' Kenshin had almost forgotten about him.
"-and, and he killed them." Neko began to shake again. "He killed them all," she whispered. "I saw him do it."
"Neko, Reizo did what he had to do." Neko gave a weak nod and started to wipe her eyes. She opened her mouth as if to go on, but a choked sob was all that came out. "You don't have to say anymore."
"Okay." She sighed, now rubbing her eyes. "Arigato." She stared at Kenshin for a few minutes, then took him by complete surprise by falling on him. "Oh Kenshin! I was so scared!" she cried into his stomach. "I thought you were dead! I didn't want you to die. I didn't--" She broke down into sobs that shook her whole body.
Kenshin was speechless. Besides Tomoe he never thought someone could care so much about his life. He didn't know what to do with the crying girl on his stomach. Weakly he brought his right arm out from under the blankets and put it on her head. "It's alright Neko, I'm okay." She quieted down a little. "You don't have to cry."
He heard her sniff a few times, and then she slowly and carefully sat up. She turned her head towards him and smiled, tears still running down the side of her face. She took his hand which still rested on her head and brought it down so it cradled her cheek. "I know." She shuddered slightly. "I know," she repeated softly. "I'm just so happy you're okay." She turned her head towards his hand so that it covered one of her eyes. Softly she gave Kenshin's bloodstained hands a kiss. "I'm just so..." She didn't finish what she was going to say.
"It's alright," Kenshin said, not knowing what else to say. Her kiss had left him speechless. Slowly he moved his hand up by her ear and softly petted her hair with his thumb. "It's going to be alright now." She moved her head into his soft caresses and started to purr slightly. Kenshin's arm soon tired and he had to move it back under the blankets. Neko sat back and dried her eyes, as Itsuo finally returned carrying a cup of water.
He helped Kenshin to sit up and drink it; just as he lay back down, Yasuo entered the room. Kenshin figured that was why it had taken Itsuo so long to come back with the water. He had told at least Yasuo that he had woken up. "So you're finally awake. You're very lucky, but I'm sure you know that," the old doctor said as he sat down next to him. He picked up the blanket covering Kenshin. "Let's just check those stitches Takeo-san put in."
Kenshin ground his teeth as Yasuo, poked and prodded his side. Once he finished, Kenshin unlocked his jaw so he could speak. "If Katsura-san isn't busy, I need to speak with him."
Yasuo gave Kenshin the same glare that Itsuo had. "Now, if you think I'm going to let you out of this bed, you'd better think again," he threatened. "You need to rest, not be worried about what's going on outside of this room. I forbid you to think of anything that's happening past that door and these walls."
Kenshin sighed. "Let me talk to Katsura-san."
Yasuo snorted. "Fine, but he's not going to let you out of bed either."
Kenshin practically groaned. Even if he wanted to, he didn't think he was capable of getting up on his own. "I'm not planning on going anywhere."
"Good. Then I'll go get him." As Yasuo stood to leave, Kenshin could hear Neko giggling softly; she was finding this rather amusing.
As Yasuo left, Kenshin attempted to sit up. "Himura-san, please, lay down," Itsuo instructed, moving to push the youth back down.
"Iie," Kenshin said bluntly, pushing Itsuo's hands away. "I have to talk to Katsura-san, and I won't do it lying down."
Itsuo let out an annoyed grunt. 'He's so stubborn.' Rising, he left the room. Kenshin was surprised when he returned quickly carrying what appeared to be a stack of cushions. Without a word the doctor helped Kenshin to sit up a little more, then set the cushions behind him. "Lean on that if you must sit up."
It all happened so fast that it left Kenshin a bit speechless. "Ar-arigato?" It came out as more of a question then an answer.
Yasuo soon entered with Katsura, who smiled at Kenshin when he saw he was awake. "Himura, you wanted to talk to me?" he asked, stepping into the room.
"Aa, I wanted to talk to you." His eyes scanned the room. "Alone."
"I understand." Katsura turned to Yasuo. "Yasuo-sensei, if you would excuse us." Yasuo gave a small nod and turned to leave.
As Itsuo moved to leave as well, Neko looked over to Kenshin. "Me too?" she asked him.
"Sorry, Neko. I need to talk to Katsura-san alone."
She let out a disappointed moan. "Alright," she said, a bit disheartened.
Itsuo chuckled as he picked her up. "Tell you what. I'll play with you while these two talk alright?"
"Okay!" Neko smiled and immediately brightened at the promise of being played with. "Bye-bye Kenshin!" she called as the two left the room, closing the door to give them privacy.
Katsura knelt down by Kenshin's side. "I'm sure you have plenty on your mind." Katsura said, after a few moments had gone by with no one speaking. "What is it you need to know?"
"Katsura-san, do you know what happened to Hiroko?"
He shook his head a bit sadly. "No, we've kept our eyes open for him, but I haven't been able to track him down."
Kenshin thought about that for a moment before speaking again. "What happened to Reizo?"
Katsura didn't answer right away. "He admitted to being a spy for the Shogun. There are penalties for spying. Execution or seppuku."
"Has either," Kenshin paused a moment. "Taken place yet?"
"No. Not yet, he's being held for the moment. I can't ignore the fact that it was because of him that you and Neko are here, but I can't overlook the fact that he is – was – a spy."
"I want to speak with him."
"Himura, you are in no condti-"
"I want to speak to him," Kenshin repeated stubbornly.
"When you're a bit better, then I'll make sure you see him."
Kenshin gave a small nod of his head to show his agreement. "Has anyone told Neko about her uncle yet?"
"No," Katsura took a moment to decided how much to tell Kenshin. "When Takeo-sensei found you, you looked as if you had already died. Apparently Neko thought you had indeed died and went into shock. She's fine now, but the doctors and I decided that it would be best not to tell her anything that would upset her until we were sure you were going to li-" Katsura stopped himself.
"I was that bad?" He really wasn't surprised; he felt so weak and dizzy just sitting up.
"Yes, you had us all very worried," Katsura answered quietly.
"Gomen," Kenshin apologized before moving on. "How's Neko? Is her leg alright? What about her fever? The shock didn't do anything permanent, did it?"
"She's fine, Himura. Her fever completely broke a couple days ago, from what I've been told her leg is just fine, and no, the shock didn't do anything permanent to her." Katsura waited to see if Kenshin had anything more to say. When he didn't speak, he went ahead and asked himself. "Is there anything else?"
"Actually, there is something you could pick up for me."
Katsura left Kenshin's room just as Itsuo came walking back with Neko in his arms. "See, they're done talking now. Now you can see Himura."
Neko waved at Katsura. "He didn't go back to sleep, did he?"
Katsura gave Neko a grin. "No, he's still awake."
"Now remember what I told you," Itsuo warned. "If he is sleepy, you let him sleep."
"I will." Neko sighed, with a slight roll of her eyes; she had heard that speech enough times already.
Itsuo brought Neko into the room, where she was overjoyed to see Kenshin again. Itsuo left them, having other things he needed to do. Neko didn't waste a beat telling just about everything that had happened while he had been asleep. "Then one night I had a dream and I was flying!" The words fell from her mouth; Kenshin was a bit surprised that she didn't pass out from forgetting to breath. The way she kept going reminded him of when he had first brought her back with him. Back then it had been slightly annoying, but now, he enjoyed every syllable that fell from her rapidly moving mouth.
A couple of days passed and Kenshin had started to regain some of his strength when a man stopped by his room. "Here, Himura-san," the man handed Kenshin a package. "Katsura-sama told me to give this to you."
"Arigato." Once Kenshin had his package, the man turned and left.
"What's that?" Neko asked curiously, nearly crawling into Kenshin's lap to get a better look.
"A book I asked Katsura-san to get me," he answered, opening it.
"Oh." Neko looked at the book. "You going to read it right now?"
"I'm going to teach you how to read with it," he answered.
"What?" Neko said speechless. "Why?"
"Because you need to learn how to read. Besides, we're both in bed, no better time to teach you than right now." He looked her in the eye. "Do you want to learn to read?"
"Yes!" she whispered, excited. "I do! I want to read!"
"Alright then," he flipped the book to the first page. "Let's get started."
Although Kenshin didn't really have any idea how to teach someone to read, he tried anyway. He pointed to letters and symbols in the book and pronounced them for Neko. At first Neko was excited to learn, then she would become frustrated, then she would listen intently to what Kenshin was trying to explain to her.
Whenever they weren't resting or eating, Kenshin practiced reading with Neko. In the beginning Kenshin didn't think he was getting through to her; Neko didn't seem to understand anything, but he kept with it, and eventually Neko was starting to catch on. Soon Neko was reading a few words out of the learning book Katsura had picked out. She grinned with accomplishment up at Kenshin with each new thing she learned. Teaching her how to read filled Kenshin with a sense of worth he hadn't felt since the garden he and Tomoe had planted and harvested together. It was a good feeling that he had forgotten existed.
Eventually Kenshin had regained enough strength to make the trip to the building Reizo was being held at. "Where are you going?" Neko asked when she saw him dressing the morning he planned to leave.
"Nowhere important," he said fixing his hair.
"Can I go?"
"Iie." He finished tying up his ponytail and moved on to straightening his gi.
"How come?"
"It's not a place for kids."
"Why?"
"Because there are a lot of mean people there."
"I thought you said you weren't going anywhere important."
"I'm not."
"But there are mean people, is Hiroko going to be there?" Now she sounded a bit panicked. "Are you going to die!"
"Neko!" He calmed his voice down before continuing. "No, I'm not going to die, and no, Hiroko isn't there. I'll be fine."
Neko sulked. "But there are mean people." Kenshin really regretted saying that. "I don't want you to go."
"Not everyone there is bad. I'm just going to go talk to someone."
"Who?"
"No one important. Don't worry." He headed towards the shoji.
"Why won't you tell me?" Neko shouted angrily as he slid the shoji open.
"Be a good girl while I'm gone," he called over his shoulder, shutting the door.
"KENSHIN!" He heard her annoyed whine as he made his way down the hall.
He met Katsura at the front door. "Ready to go?" Katsura asked when he got there. Kenshin gave a nod of his head and a hai. "Let's go then." Katsura led the way outside to a carriage that was waiting for them. Katsura had arranged the carriage; he had told Kenshin that he, himself, had not felt like making the long walk to where they were holding Reizo in the hot sun. In truth, he had arranged the carriage so Kenshin wouldn't strain himself too much. Yasuo was already upset over the fact that Kenshin was out of bed.
Kenshin climbed into the carriage; he hadn't ridden in many, preferring to walk. It was easier to defend yourself walking then it was in a closed carriage, but this is what Katsura wanted, so he got in. He took his katana and wakizashi and rested them by his side once he was inside. He had offered to walk beside the carriage, like he had done on many bodyguard duties in the past, but Katsura had insisted that he sit with him inside the carriage.
The ride there was uneventful; Katsura had filled Kenshin in on a few things, such as some of the recent Shinsengumi movements, and other information about the war. Kenshin was glad to get out of the carriage once they got there. It was too bumpy and closed off for his liking.
Katsura led the way through a building that Kenshin had never visited before. Katsura explained that this was where they kept most people they had to question or hold. To Kenshin, it was nothing more than the prison he had been locked in under the Shinsengumi. Katsura took them to an empty room and sat down on one of the three mats that were already prepared for them. He motioned for Kenshin to sit down on the one beside him.
It didn't take long before a couple of men brought Reizo in. His hands were tied together in front of him and he was a bit thinner than the last time Kenshin saw him. He sat down on the last mat in front of Katsura and Kenshin; he bowed low to each of them. When he sat up he kept his head bowed and didn't look either of them in the eye.
"Reizo."
"Hai, Katsura-sama," he answered still not meeting Katsura's eyes.
"I brought Himura here because he wanted to talk to you. Today I will also decide your fate."
"Hai, Katsura-sama." Reizo looked up to Kenshin and their eyes locked, briefly, before Reizo quickly lowered his head again. "You wanted to speak with me, Himura-san."
For some reason it felt awkward hearing Reizo add the honorific to his name. Reizo hadn't done that in some time. "I just have a few questions." He waited to see if Reizo was going to respond; he didn't. "I want to know why. Why did you try to hide Neko and myself on your own?"
Reizo nearly laughed. "Well, if I had told someone that you two should be hidden better, then I would have to tell them why. I was pretty sure someone would become suspicious of my 'inside knowledge' on Hiroko's movements. So I decided to do it on my own. Although I guess I made too many mistakes."
"What kind of mistakes?" Kenshin asked, figuring Hiroko finding out being the biggest one of all.
"I didn't want anyone to know it was me; that way I could keep things going as they had been, with Hiroko still thinking I was on his side, and with no one else figuring out I was a spy. I wanted to drug you in your sleep. That way even you wouldn't have known it was me, but you woke up and saw me. It took me too long to take Neko to the hiding spot I picked out, so I wasn't able to get the both of you out of there in one night. And of course, Hiroko figured out what was going on."
"If I hadn't woken up, what would you have done?"
"I would have left you two in the hiding spot, alone. Hiroko's potion he gave me was supposed to knock you out all day. I didn't think Neko could go very far with her leg, and didn't think she would want to leave your side anyway. After the attack I had planned on leaving a note for someone to find that would explain where you two were. Worst come to worst, I figured you would have woken up and come back in the end, if no one believed the letter. Or I could have even gone to get you, saying I had a funny feeling the note had been telling the truth."
"Why even bother?"
Reizo sat stunned for a few minutes. "Why even bother? Because you could have died! I cared about your life, that's why I bothered!"
"You should have left me. If you hadn't gone back for help you wouldn't be here now."
"I know that. I know that. But if I hadn't done something you would have died. I couldn't let you die because of me! I didn't care what happened to me; I just couldn't let you die."
"Just a couple more questions. When the Inn was attacked, you said that Neko broke away from you and ran back. Then you told me later that you couldn't find her. Were you lying? Did you really give her to Hiroko that day or were you telling me the truth?"
"I was telling you the truth. I had broken ties with Hiroko and all Shinsengumi long before the attack."
"When I got the letter, did you have any idea who it was from?"
"I guessed it was Hiroko. He would be the only low enough to send a kid to deliver a message. Or use a kid to get to someone for that matter…"
"Once you knew Neko and I went missing and were taken by Hiroko, did you know where either of us were?"
"No, I was a spy. I was only supposed to gather information, not receive it."
"That's all I wanted to know." Kenshin tried to look in Reizo's eyes, but he still would not look up at him. "Arigato, Reizo, for helping me and Neko." Reizo gave a small smile and mumbled something that sounded like a you're welcome.
"Reizo, I think I have finally come up with a decision," Katsura said softly, speaking for the first time since Kenshin's questioning.
"I understand your decision no matter what you choose, Katsura-sama." As Reizo said this, his shoulders slumped. He knew what the fate of a captured spy was.
"You are a spy and have given out information to the enemy; however, you risked your own life on more than one occasion to save Himura-san and Neko-chan. You've also helped the Ishin Shishi in more than one way. For this I cannot condemn you to death." For the first time, Reizo looked up at the two of them, his mouth opened slightly. "However, I cannot have you come back and work for me. You are to be released, but are to leave Kyoto for a few months, and I don't want to see you working for either side of this war, again."
"H-hai, Katsura-sama," Reizo said, stunned, bowing low to the floor.
Katsura rose to his feet and Kenshin stood up as well. "I thank you for your loyalty and all the help you've given us." He left the room, but Kenshin lingered a moment.
He looked down at Reizo; finally Reizo looked up at him. "Tell Neko good-bye for me, and tell her I'm sorry I couldn't tell her myself," Reizo said with a small smile.
"I will." Kenshin returned Reizo's smile with a small one of his own. Reizo let out a small chuckle. "What?"
"I made you smile." Kenshin quickly scowled, but a light blush appeared on his face, which made Reizo laugh even more. "And I made you go red in the face!" He laughed even harder, the realization that he was going to live finally fully sinking in. He was able to calm himself down after a moment. "I'm going to miss you, Himura."
Kenshin gave a nod of his head; after spending so much time with the man, Reizo knew that nod meant that he would miss him as well. "Sayonara, Reizo."
"Sayonara, Himura."
"Why'd he say good-bye?" Neko asked when Kenshin delivered his message.
"Because he has to go away, and he can't come back."
"But I didn't get to say good-bye!" she shouted, heartbroken. "I don't want Reizo to go away!"
Kenshin sighed; he was tired and the day's events had exhausted him more than he would like to admit. "He didn't want to go either, but sometimes, things happen that you can't help. He knows you will miss him."
"He does?" she asked, wiping away a tear from her eye.
"Of course he does." Kenshin lay down onto his pillow.
Neko followed Kenshin's example. "Do you think he will miss me?"
"Yes, I know he will miss you."
Kenshin closed his eyes; the last thing he heard that night was Neko whisper "Good-bye, Reizo."
Time passed slowly. Kenshin continued to teach Neko to read, and they both continued to heal. At long last, the day came when Neko could take off her splint.
"Now, you still have to take it easy." Yasuo instructed as he started to take it off. Kenshin, Yasuo and Neko were sitting on the back porch of the inn.
"I will!" Neko responded quickly, eager to walk normally again. With the splint on she hadn't been able to bend her knee, which made walking awkward.
"There you go. It's off!" Yasuo announced. Neko giggled with joy and jumped off the porch, but to her dismay, fell. Yasuo quickly bent over and picked her up. "I told you to take it easy." Neko looked up at him fearfully. The old doctor thought he had been too harsh. "It's all right, Neko. I know you're excited, but try to be careful." His words did nothing to comfort her.
"Ther-there's something wrong with my leg. It doesn't feel right." She looked up at him, panic in her eyes. "I thought you said it was better now."
"It's probably just stiff from being in the splint for so long. Right?" Kenshin said, and then looked to Yasuo for confirmation.
"It could be, but…" he lifted Neko in the air and set her on the porch again. "Let's take a good look at it."
Kenshin watched Yasuo's face carefully. The old doctor looked too nervous for Neko's leg to just be stiff from not being used enough. 'He's not telling us something.'
"Okay, now I want you to make your leg as straight as it can go. Tell me when it hurts." Neko gave a small okay and slowly straightened her leg until her knee locked up. "Does it hurt anywhere?" Neko shook her head. "It feels stiff…" He reached down and rubbed his hand gently up and down on one of the scars that had been left behind. "…right here. Doesn't it? Like a string that's being held too tight, right?" Neko nodded her head again.
He moved her so that she was sitting more on her right hip then her bottom. "Now I want you to bend your leg under you, as far as you can go. Don't overdo it."
Neko nodded her head and started to, but only managed to bend just over halfway behind her. "It won't go," she said, tears welling up in her eyes. "I can't make it go. Why won't it go?" She looked up at Yasuo who had covered his eyes with one of his hands. "What's wrong with me?"
"Yasuo, what's happened? Did it heal wrong?" Now Kenshin was shouting, the doctor's silence was making him as nervous as Neko. "Is it because she walked on it while it was healing? What went wrong!"
"Nothing went wrong!" Yasuo snapped. "Nothing went wrong." He repeated to calm himself down. "I was hoping this wasn't going to happen…"
When it was obvious Yasuo wasn't going to continue, Kenshin prodded him further. "What? What happened?"
Yasuo rubbed his mouth. "Her muscles were too torn up. They healed, but… how can I explain this?" He rubbed his forehead as he thought. "When the dogs attacked, they ripped her leg apart." Neko shuddered at the memory. "We don't have the skills to fix something like that. Her body did it for her, but it had to compensate for the muscles that couldn't be fixed."
"So they healed too tightly?" Kenshin had a feeling he knew where this conversation was going.
"That's one way of putting it."
"What does compensate mean? Does it mean it will get better?" Neko asked, thoroughly confused, and not liking that Yasuo was speaking like she wasn't there.
"It means to make up for something." Kenshin answered Neko's question first before asking one of his own. "Neko's leg is never going to be the same, is it?"
Yasuo shook his head slowly. "What! What does that mean!" Neko was terrified. "My leg will get better! It doesn't hurt anymore, so that means it's better! I'll be able to run again! Right? Soon I can play and run and jump and-"
Yasuo cut Neko off. "Yes, your leg is better, and you'll be able to walk, but walking alone will be difficult. Running will be impossible."
"No." Neko moaned, tears welling up in her eyes. She turned to her angel, he always made things better. "He's lying right? Kenshin, Yasuo is lying right? My leg will be okay, right?" Kenshin lowered his head, bangs covering his eyes. "Kenshin! He's lying! Right! Tell me he's lying!" He wouldn't look up at her. "No!" she shrieked. "Kenshin, he's lying! He's lying! Kenshin," she grew quiet "please tell me he's lying."
Finally he looked up at her. She was sitting there, starring at him with bloodshot eyes, tears streaming down her face. She started to hiccup slightly as she waited for his answer. "Neko, Yasuo-sensei is a doctor, he's not lying."
"No!" she shouted, stepping off the porch. "I'll show you!" She stood, stubbornly, and took a step. She leaned awkwardly to her left, but managed to take another step. She tried to go faster, but she kept stumbling. She took another step, but this time she fell to the ground. Kenshin and Yasuo watched as she started to pick herself up, until she slammed herself to the ground again with a yell. "I can't do it! It's not fair! It's not! It's not!" She pounded her fist into the ground until she tired herself out.
During her screaming, Yasuo had turned to Kenshin. "As a doctor, I can't do anything else for her." He looked over to the screaming child, trying to kill the ground. "I can't even comfort her." The old doctor got to his feet and started to walk inside. "Can't even comfort her," he repeated, looking straight at Kenshin before heading in.
Kenshin could take a hint; he hadn't needed Yasuo's prodding anyway. He picked himself off the porch and put his hand on Neko's shoulder just as she stopped hammering on the ground. Feeling his hand she looked up, her mouth moved a few times, but she said nothing. He knelt down beside her as her eyes welled up with tears. "Oh Kenshin!" she cried, falling into him, hugging him tightly. "I want my leg to work! Why won't it work? It's not fair! It's not fair!"
He sat quietly and let her vent her frustrations to him. He stroked her head, trying to comfort her. Eventually she calmed down; even after her tears had long stopped she clung tightly to him. He wasn't sure when she fell asleep, but gradually her grip around his waist had loosened, her breathing had become softer, and she let out a tired sigh. Gently he picked Neko up and carried her to her bed. He pulled the blanket up to her shoulders and made sure her doll was within arm's reach.
He sat back and watched her sleep for awhile. "I'm sorry Neko. Because you were around me, you were hurt. Because of me you'll never be able to run again, or even play like a normal kid." He watched as Neko's hand felt around for her doll. He pushed it closer and once her hand wrapped around it she settled down again. "You have a right to know why this happened to you." As he continued to watch the sleeping girl, Kenshin steeled himself in his resolve to explain everything to Neko.
Although he told himself that he would explain everything to Neko, he didn't do it right away. She had enough on her mind. Takeo had come in later that day and had given her a cane, explaining it would help her walk. Which she threw across the room, then insisted nothing was wrong with her.
It took a long talk by all three of the doctors before Neko would even touch the cane. She crossed her arms in front of her chest and snorted at all the doctors prodding. She kept insisting that canes were for old people. "Old people like Yasuo," she said angrily. In the end they had turned to Kenshin, and he had been the one who managed to give it to her without it being hurled right back at him. Getting her to walk with it was even harder. She refused to even get out of bed for a couple days. Takeo came up with the idea that they should stop bringing food to her. She would have to walk to the dinning area like everyone else. Her stomach gave out at long last and one day she came limping in with her cane and sat down next to Kenshin. After eating she limped back out. It was easier to get her walking after that.
It was a few days later, after Neko became a bit more used to walking around with her cane, that Kenshin finally decided to talk to Neko. After breakfast he suggested they take a little walk together outside. "Where are we going?" she asked excitedly as she slipped her geta on her feet.
"Somewhere we can talk." Kenshin stepped outside the door and waited for Neko to follow him. She shut the door behind her and Kenshin started to head down the path.
"Kenshin?" He turned back towards her and saw Neko standing, holding her free hand out to him. Her eyes were pleading with him as she stood there looking at him, she tried to extend her hand farther to him. "Kenshin?" she repeated. When he continued to just stare at her, Neko sighed and began to lower her arm.
When he took her hand, it took her by complete surprise. "Ready now?" he asked, a small smile playing upon his face. She smiled brightly up at him and gave a quick nod of her head.
"Hai!" she whispered.
They walked through the city, hand in hand; Kenshin moved slowly enough that Neko could keep up with him without tiring. They stopped now and then as Neko stared wide-eyed at all the wares the vendors were selling.
At last they reached the place Kenshin had already picked out for their talk. Away from the bustling of people, he lead her off the path, following a slow moving river, until only the soft gurgling of the water could be heard.
When Kenshin stopped, Neko sat down on the grassy riverbank and kicked her geta off. She leaned back, propping herself up on her arms, locking up her elbows, staring up at the sunlight. It warmed her skin, giving her a nice sensation running throughout her body. She closed her eyes and basked in it.
"Neko." She opened her eyes and looked over at her angel. He was standing by the slow-moving water, staring intently into it. His red locks blowing softly in the gentle breeze, his hand resting on his sword's hilt… and yet, he looked so sad. "I didn't bring you here just to see the river."
Neko unlocked her arms and sat up. She twisted them a couple of times; they had become stiff from the way she had been sitting. "Then why are we here, Kenshin?"
"There's… there's something I need to tell you. To explain to you why Hiroko attacked you." He was quiet for a little while, trying to find a way to start. "Not many people call me Kenshin."
"I know!" Neko said brightly, feeling delighted that she knew the answer. "They call you Himura!"
"Not many people call me that either." He stared harder at the river.
"Oh." Suddenly she felt very cold. "Is it…" She paused "Battòsai?"
"You know?" He turned to look at her.
She pulled her knees up to her chin. "Kanai told me, but I didn't believe him at first."
"When did you believe him?"
"When…" She buried her face in her knees "When I saw you kill," she said softly. That's when she first started to believe, but she still hadn't wanted to admit it, even back then. Now, with even her angel himself telling her, she couldn't ignore it; he was the Battòsai. "Kanai use to tell me stories about the Batto- about you. He was just trying to scare me; he told me that you would kill women and children for the fun of it." She looked up at him and smiled. "But you saved me! So I don't believe him!" Her face fell for a moment. "I mean, you don't kill for fun, do you?"
"Iie." He turned away from the river and sat down beside Neko. "I don't want to kill," he said softly. "Neko, I will explain to you why you were hurt, if you want to listen."
"Yes," she whispered. "I want to know all about you."
'Where to begin?' he thought to himself. He had been planning this talk for days, and he still had no idea how he wanted to explain things to her. 'I've haven't talked to anyone like this since…'
"If you want, I won't tell anyone," Neko said softly, pulling Kenshin from his thoughts before they could go any farther.
He thought about that for a moment. "Yes, Neko, I would like that."
"Alright."
'Might as well start at the beginning.' Kenshin took a deep breath. "When I was younger, I saw people really close to me killed, right before my eyes."
Neko's eyes went wide. "Just like me?" she asked, amazed.
He smiled slightly. "Yes, I was just about your age as well."
"What happened! What did you do?" She leaned closer to him. Had an angel come and saved him as well?
"A man came and saved me before they could kill me. He took me in and raised me, he was also my Shishou."
"So you learned your swords from him."
"Yes I learned my sword style from him," he corrected her.
"Then why aren't you with him right now? Or is Katsura your Shishou?"
"No, Katsura isn't my Shishou." Kenshin was slightly amused at the idea of Katsura being anything like Hiko. "My Shishou and I had a fight, and I left him to join the war. Katsura saw me practicing and thought that my skills with the sword could help him win this war. I became an assassin for him and I killed." He paused a moment, seeing how she would react. He was trying to put this in words she would understand. "After a while, I grew cold, I didn't care about anything."
"You didn't? Not even…" She thought a moment "…about me?"
"I didn't know you back then," Kenshin said with a flat voice.
"Oh yeah. Hm, then about Reizo?"
"I didn't care about anything; I was just waiting to die." Neko looked horrified. "Then, someone came and reminded me, that there are important things to care about in life."
"Who was it?" She was trying to think of someone it could be. Katsura maybe? Or was it Reizo? She'd never really seen anyone else talk to Kenshin.
"You've never met her." Kenshin quickly moved on. "After meeting her, I couldn't be an assassin anymore, killing from the shadows, attacking people before they even had a chance to defend themselves. So I moved from the shadows and became a bodyguard. I left a few people who fought me alive, word spread about me because of those people. Now that others knew who I was and what I looked like, they tried even harder to stop me."
"To kill you," Neko whispered.
"Yes, to kill me. They would use any means to stop me, and I guessed Hiroko thought that if he hurt you, he would hurt me." He plucked a blade of grass from the ground and twirled it in his fingers. "Everything that happened to you, it was all because of me. If you hadn't been associated with me, then nothing would have happened to you."
"It's not your fault," Neko said softly. "Kanai said it was Hiroko's and Muroi's fault, because they were the ones who hurt us in the first place. It's not your fault and it's not mine." They were quiet for a little while, both thinking over their own thoughts. "What happened to her?"
"Hm?" He was pulled from his thoughts so suddenly he missed what she had said.
"That lady who helped you, where is she?" Neko knew she had asked the wrong question when Kenshin's head drooped. His bangs fell in front of his eyes, hiding them from her sight. His hands clutched his hakama for a moment, and then loosened.
"She-she was murdered," he said quickly, turning his head away from Neko. He had forgotten how much it hurt to say it. Tomoe was dead, killed by his own two hands. Lost in his morbid thoughts, he jumped when he felt a weight against his side. Neko was leaning against him, burying her head in his side.
"I'm sorry," she murmured. "I'm sorry." Kenshin could feel his chest tighten up. "I'm sorry your friend died."
"Neko, don't you understand?" he yelled. Emotions he had tried to lock away were bombarding him. "I kill people." His voice was rough and angry. "You should hate someone like me. I've killed a lot of people and-" He was cut short when Neko hugged him tightly to her.
"I do understand! I do! Daddy! Daddy killed! I know he did! He would come home some nights, and he would be so sad! I know he killed." She could feel Kenshin trembling in her grasp. "I don't hate you! Kenshin, you're my angel! I don't understand this war, but I know everyone kills! Even Reizo! I saw him! He killed too!"
"Reizo's nothing like me! I killed… I killed…" Kenshin pinched his eyes shut. 'I killed her. I killed Tomoe with my own hands. I killed her.'
Neko held him tighter. "Kenshin, please don't be sad. Kenshin, I care about you! Please! Don't be sad." Kenshin could feel the side of his body start to get damp. He opened his eyes and looked down at Neko. "You mean so much to me. Right now, you, uncle, and Kanai are all I have left," she said softly as a few lingering tears rolled down her face.
Kenshin jerked suddenly. He had forgotten no one had told her about her uncle yet. "Neko, I have something else to tell you." She looked up at him and nodded. "I'm sorry Neko, but your uncle, he's dead."
He felt Neko's arms stiffen around him. "Nani?" She hardly managed to breath the word.
He said it bluntly, he knew, but he didn't know any other way to say it. "He died in battle Neko. He's dead."
For a while she was quiet, stunned; then she started to slowly shake her head from side to side. Tears started rolling down her face faster and faster. "No." She leaned her head against Kenshin. "Not Uncle, too." She began to sob. "Uncle…"
Kenshin turned and pulled her close to him. "I'm sorry, Neko," he said softly, trying to comfort her.
"What's going to happen to me?" she asked, once she had control over her voice again. "Do I get to stay with you now!" She looked up hopefully to him, her bright green eyes praying that he'd say yes.
"You can't stay with me. You'll just get hurt again."
She was quiet for a little while; she was slowly starting to cry again. Her sniffling increased and tears started to fall from her eyes faster. Right before she broke into sobs she cried, "But I don't want to leave you!"
For a long time Kenshin sat quietly and let Neko cry on him. He didn't know how to comfort her, so he just sat with her and listened whenever she calmed down long enough to tell him a story about her uncle. Eventually she fell asleep, still lightly clutching him. Carefully he unwound her hands from around his waist. He tucked her cane underneath his arm and put her geta back onto her feet.
With effortless grace he hoisted her into the air without waking her. He headed back to the safe house, his mind buzzing with thoughts. He had told her, but her reaction had been the last thing he had expected. She still cared about him, she wasn't afraid of him; she had even tried to comfort him. He looked down at the sleeping child in his arms. Why wasn't she afraid of him? Why did she want to so badly stay with him?
Neko was still sleeping by the time he reached the safe house. He carried her to their room and laid her on her futon. As he was covering her up she stretched slightly and opened her eyes, blinking against the light. "Kenshin?" she said through a yawn. "Stay with me."
"I'm right here," he assured her and placed his hand on her forehead.
She rolled to her side, her eyes closing again. "I don't want you to go away," she murmured, drifting off to sleep again.
When Kenshin woke Neko later for dinner, she was unusually quiet. Her eyes held a faraway look as she nibbled on what had been set before her. Kenshin left her to her thoughts, allowing her to sort out everything she had learned that day.
When it came time for bed, she wasn't tired yet. She managed to talk Itsuo into telling her a story. "A story, what kind?" he asked as he made himself comfortable beside her.
"An exciting one! Full of action! With love in it!"
"Okay, let's see…" He thought a few moments before he finally thought of one. It was about a prince who ruled his lands fairly, and he was a very kind prince. His father passed away of natural causes and crowned that prince to be the new king because he was so kind and fair. His twin brother was very jealous of the good prince. The brother became even more jealous when the woman he had secretly been in love with married the good prince. Angry, the brother attacked the good prince and scarred his handsome face so that no one would recognize him. The brother sent the good prince far, far away, and the evil brother ruled in his place. Because they were twins, no one knew what had happened.
A couple years went by and the good prince worked hard and became skilled with a sword and hand to hand combat. During his training, however, the evil brother was ruining the kingdom, for he was greedy and everyone suffered under him. As soon as the good prince was strong enough he went back to claim the throne. He planned to kill his brother and take over as the rightful king once more. His wife found him roaming the halls looking for his evil brother, but when she saw his horrible scarred face she did not recognize him right away. He spoke to her, telling her how much he loved her. She knew it was him by his words and her love for him. She embraced him and told him she didn't care what he looked like, as long he was truly her husband.
Together the two of them stormed into the evil brother's bedroom to kill him. The brother fought back, but the good prince was a much better fighter than his brother and soon had his sword to his brother's throat. The good prince was ready to kill his brother, but he couldn't, for he was a good, kind-hearted man. Instead he scarred his brother's face like his own. "An eye for an eye," he told his brother as he sent him far, far away. The good prince took over as king and his people were happy. They all lived happily ever after.
"Wait," Neko said, confused at the end of the story. "Why didn't the good prince kill his evil brother? The brother was the bad guy. All bad guys die at the end."
"It was because the good prince was a kind man. He said 'an eye for an eye' which means he would only hurt his brother the same way he hurt him. So the bad guy only suffered what the good prince suffered." Itsuo answered awkwardly. It was just a story; he wasn't sure exactly how to explain it.
"Oh, I get it." She said with a smile. "An eye for an eye!"
"Yes, yes. Now time for bed," Itsuo said, pushing her down. After tucking the covers around her, the young doctor stood and said a quick goodnight to both Kenshin and Neko.
"I liked that story," Neko said, tilting her head towards Kenshin after Itsuo left.
"That's nice," he responded with a sigh, trying to go to sleep.
"Kenshin?"
"What?"
"I'm not sleepy yet."
"Oyasumi," Kenshin said gruffly, turning so his back was facing Neko.
Neko snorted and turned her back on him as well. She lay quietly, thinking about the story Itsuo had told her. She listened to Kenshin's gentle breathing as he fell asleep. His steady, quiet breathing became slightly hypnotic. Neko's eyes started to close and she fell asleep, to dream of the good prince as he battled his wicked brother.