AN: Yes, yes, everyone wants to know if Harry and Remus will be reunited. Yes! Eventually. Just not right this second. Don't worry I wasn't going to leave you hanging. Hehehe.

000

Harry looked around, finding himself in a strange house. Unfamiliar, but like so many things he had seen, it gave off an air of familiarity. The cozy family room contained two people—a middle-aged couple pouring over several thick binders. They looked tired and determined, but contented.

Harry squinted at them. The woman's auburn hair was pulled into a loose bun behind her head. She was wearing Muggle clothes, a dark green blouse, and was surveying the papers on her lap through square silver glasses. Her husband was wearing Muggle clothes as well, from the way they were dressed, Harry guessed it was early spring. His dark brown hair was graying around the temples, and he was looking over his wife's shoulder with vivid green eyes.

Something in Harry's mind clicked. He had seen them before, at his parents' wedding. The Evans. His mother's parents. His grandparents.

"Flowers?" asked Mrs. Evans, sighing.

"Every last one of them, delivered last night," replied Mr. Evans evenly.

"Cake?"

"Two feet high and covered in little pink flowers."

"Bridesmaid dresses?" she asked.

"Honey," said Mr. Evans kindly. "Everything is ready. Don't worry about it."

Mrs. Evans took her glasses off and sighed, massaging her temples. "I know…it's just that Petunia is so particular—I'm worried that the slightest little mishap will ruin her entire experience and—"

Mr. Evans gently massaged his wife's shoulders. "Everything will be fine," he assured her. "Things are going to go flawlessly tomorrow. It's going to be the happiest day of her life."

"AAAAAAHHHH!" An earsplitting shriek tore through the house. "Where are my shoes? They were right here!" Mr. And Mrs. Evans winced as the voice of their eldest daughter reverberated from upstairs, out of sight. Harry found that the sound didn't alarm him too much. It had been a staple of his entire childhood.

Harry's brain asked the question he had been previously distracted from. Whose memory was this? His eyes swept the room once again, and they fell upon a pair of eyes peering through the glass paneling surrounding the front door. The eyes silently watched the Evans, just as Harry was doing. Harry turned and glided like a ghost through the front door, out onto the patio.

Two more people stood just outside of the door. A young Lily Evans took one last peek through the windows of her home and turned back to her boyfriend. James stood only a few inches taller than Harry. He was tan broad-chested, obviously a side effect of years of Quidditch. He cringed as Petunia's shrieks drifted outside.

"Merlin and Agrippa, what the buggering hell is that noise?" demanded James, wincing.

"My dear sister," said Lily grimly. "Get used to it." Lily looked briefly at the door. "Are you ready to go in?" she asked him.

James's eyes darted towards the oak door. "Yes," he said. "No! Yes." He ran his hand through his messy hair, though Harry thought it seemed more of a nervous habit than anything else. He seemed to have abandoned his usual cocky slouch for an uneasy, rigid posture.

Lily bit back a smile, apparently enjoying the spectacle. "Are you nervous?" she asked. She clasped both his hands in hers. "You're never nervous. Not before Quidditch matches or tests or graduation speeches or, well….anything."

"You make me nervous," he said softly, smiling. He kissed her forehead and she giggled. He ran another hand through his jet black hair. "How do I look?"

"Like you just fell off your Nimbus and landed on my doorstep," she replied. Harry's heart leapt at the word "Nimbus." James looked even more anxious. "Don't worry, you look wonderful." She reached out to ring the doorbell. Her finger paused just above the button, as a terrified expression crossed James's face. Lily smiled reassuringly at him and pressed down on the button. A hollow ringing sound echoed through the house, accompanied by Petunia's braying shrieks.

"THAT HAD BETTER BLOODY WELL NOT BE VERNON! WHERE'S MY ROBE! AAAAAHHH!"

Mrs. Evans pulled open the door, her eyes lighting up immediately when she saw her daughter. "Lily!" she cried, leaping forward to embrace her daughter.

Her father rose from the couch, smiling broadly. "We were worried you wouldn't make it back in time, Firefly."

James looked at Lily with an eyebrow raised. "Firefly?" he mouthed silently. Lily chose to ignore him.

"I wouldn't miss it for the world, Dad," said Lily, hugging her father tightly. They collectively winced as more shrieking sounded from upstairs. Harry pondered the fact that Mr. And Mrs. Evans did not seem to understand the concept of instantaneous transportation.

"Now Lily," Mrs. Evans advanced towards James, her eyes glinting mischievously. "Please tell us who your handsome friend is."

"Mum, Dad," said Lily, extending her hand towards him. "This is James Potter."

"Please to meet you, son," said Mr. Evans genially. He firmly shook James's hand and smiled. "Sorry things are so hectic here. Wedding tomorrow and all."

"Oh, the pleasure is mine, sir," said James. Harry thought he was trying very hard to keep cool.

"Are you from a…" Mr. Evans paused, searching for a word. "Muggle! A Muggle family as well James?" he asked.

"Oh, no, sir," said James. "My both sides of my family have been witches and wizards for as long as anyone can remember."

"Oh," said Mr. Evans. "That's nice."

Mrs. Evans looked at James thoughtfully. "James Potter?" she said finally. "The Quad—er—Quidditch player at Lily's school? That James Potter?"

"The very same, apparently," said James, politely kissing Mrs. Evan's hand. James smirked at Lily, whose face had turned slightly pink.

"You're such a sweet young man!" said Mrs. Evans. "Well, now, isn't that funny? Lily would always come home raving about what an intolerable little egotist you were, but really I always thought that deep down she wanted—"

Lily cleared her throat loudly. "Yes! Thank you very much, Mum," she said, cutting her off. James wiggled his eyebrows at her while her parents' backs were turned. "How are things coming for the wedding?" she asked through gritted teeth.

"They're going very well," said Mr. Evans firmly. "Nothing to worry about."

"Oh, that reminds me dear," said Mrs. Evans. She reached behind the couch and pulled out a flat white box. "Try this on. It's your bridesmaid dress."

"Ooh," said Lily, accepting the box. "What dress did she end up choosing? I really liked that sky blue off the shoulder…" she trailed off, looking in puzzlement at the strained smiles on her parents' faces.

"Petunia chose a lovely dress," said Mrs. Evans. Harry thought she sounded like she was trying to convince herself of this fact more than her daughter.

"Just make sure it fits, alright Firefly?" said Mr. Evans.

Lily nodded. "Sure, Dad."

"Do you have any luggage, James?" asked Mr. Evans.

"Oh—yes," said James pleasantly. Mr. And Mrs. Evans stared at him expectantly. Harry had to agree. James had walked into the house virtually empty handed.

"It's in my pocket," explained James, indicating his empty looking pocket. .

"Oh," said Mr. Evans. Apparently they had grown accustomed to magical things that cannot he easily explained.

"That's nice," said Mrs. Evans. "Show James to his room, would you, dear?"

"Of course." James trailed behind her as she went upstairs.

"It was very nice meeting you both," said James.

"The pleasure was ours, dear," said Mrs. Evans. Mr. Evans nodded in agreement. Harry followed his parents upstairs. Lily pushed open one of the doors, revealing a small, cozy bedroom decorated with soft, off-white colors. It contained an abundant amount of lace. Well…Petunia had to get it somewhere.

"This is your room," said Lily. James peeked his head in and looked around, seemingly fascinated. "I know it's not quite as impressive as the Potter Mansion—"

Harry raised an eyebrow. Mansion, eh? That would explain the mountains of gold in his bank vault.

"No!" said James earnestly. "It's nice. Perfect." He looked around the hall. "Where's your room?" he asked innocently. Lily didn't respond, but she made a face at him. She turned and headed down the hallway. James followed wordlessly behind her, a rather idiotic grin on his face.

Lily ushered James into her bedroom. It was about the size of the other rooms, but had bolder colors than the rest of the house. The walls were a bright, deep blue, and were adorned with various posters. Harry recognized a few of them, but was slightly bewildered by most. The Beatles and Queen were obviously rock bands, though Harry had very little contact with any sort of music in the Dursley household. She also had a few posters of soccer teams Harry had never heard of. Dudley didn't follow football. Compared to the rest of the house, her room contained much less lace, but there were several stuffed animals propped up on the bed and dresser.

James paused in front of the dresser and picked up on of the animals. It was a squishy red and gold dragon. It blinked and flicked its fluffy tail when James stroked its back.

"Hey," said James suddenly, sounding affronted. "I bought this for you for Christmas sixth year and you told me you took great pleasure in chucking it out the window of the North tower!"

"It was a cute little dragon," Lily shrugged. "It's not the dragon's fault you were the one that bought it." James rolled his eyes theatrically. "I'm going to try this on," she said, patting the box. She slipped behind a folding silk screen, out of sight. James sighed. He plopped down on the bed and stared at the ceiling.

A few moments later, Lily emerged from behind the screen, wearing what was quite possibly the ugliest dress Harry had ever seen. It was even uglier than the frilly-collared aberration Mrs. Weasley had hoisted onto Ron for the Yule Ball fourth year.

Lily's dress was composed of numerous layers of frilly, shiny pink taffeta. It had a high collar, and even more layers of peeling pink fabric blossoming around her neck. It was hideous.

"How bad is it?" asked Lily twirling. James looked at her thoughtfully.

"I think it's the most beautiful, sexy thing I've ever seen," he said honestly.

"Really?"

"Yep. Too bad about that ugly dress though," he added playfully.

Lily rolled her eyes. She caught sight of herself in the mirror and paled. "Oh. My. God. My sister is completely insane…oy. Well, at least it fits," she muttered dully. She hurried back behind the changing screen. "They should have laws against dresses like this," she grunted. The layers of taffeta rustled loudly as she attempted to free herself from her pink prison.

Harry thought he heard something shifting outside the door.

"Azkaban would be very crowded if everyone wearing something ugly was tossed in," mused James.

"Azkaban?" asked Lily curiously, still behind the screen.

"Wizard prison," said James, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. He sat up slightly. "Oh come now, tell me you've heard of Azkaban?"

"Hmm…the name sounds familiar…" Lily paused, emerging from the curtain a moment later in jeans and a t-shirt. She sat down next to James and attempted to tame the frilly pink dress back into its white box. It was proving extremely difficult. Harry stared at it. Had it been vacuum sealed in there or something? Lily gave up and pulled out her wand.

James shook his head. "Azkaban is one of the most terrible places on Earth."

"Why? What's it like?" Lily's dress sprang up and began stuffing itself into the box.

"The prison is guarded by Dementors," James said quietly.

Lily's eyes widened. Had she ever met a Dementor? Or seen one? Harry knew that she must have covered them at some point in her DADA curriculum.

"Hundreds of them," elaborated James darkly. "All over the island. My uncle had to go there once, for the Ministry—it's—they say most prisoners go mad within weeks."

"Oh my…" said Lily. The dress box shut itself tightly and fell to the floor, motionless. James flicked his wand and the dress rose again and floated in front of them, dancing and fluttering as if an invisible person were inside of it.

"Do you think it would be less ugly if it were blue?" he asked casually. He flicked his wand and the dress immediately turned to a bright, vivid blue, almost matching the color of the walls.

"Stop that, James," she said indignantly, but giggled despite herself. "I just put that away!"

"How about green?" he asked, smiling now and clearly enjoying himself. At that moment, several unfortunate things happened.

Petunia burst through the door screeching furiously about how her dress was not ugly, but more tasteful and elegant than anything Lily had ever owned. She was wearing a voluminous white terrycloth bathrobe, her hair was entombed securely in dozens of pink plastic rollers, and her face was covered in a thick layer of sea green gunk.

James flicked his wand at the dress, turning it a deep shade of forest green. His mischievous grin quickly faded when he caught sight of Petunia's green face and pink rollers, and he yelled very loudly, apparently in fear. Harry snickered.

Petunia's shrieks of fury turned very quickly into shrieks of fear when she caught sight of James performing what Harry thought was a very non-threatening bit of magic. Soon they were both screaming. James instinctively raised his wand at her.

"Merlin and Agrippa!" yelled James in alarm. "Lily, did you know there was a hag living in your house!"

"James, no!" cried Lily, grabbing his hand. "You git, that's—" Outside, heavy footsteps thundered down the hallway, growing closer. The large bulk of a man suddenly materialized in the doorway.

"Petunia?" he said gruffly. "What's all the shouting about, pumpkin?" His eyes widened suddenly when he saw James, Lily, James's wand, and the floating green dress. "What the buggering hell is going on in here?" He demanded, his eyes bulging. Harry surveyed his uncle critically. Vernon's was much younger and not quite as spherical as Harry remembered. He was slightly portly now, wearing a professional business suit, and noticeably lacking his large, bristly moustache.

Petunia stared at them all in opened mouthed horror. "Vernon!" was all she managed to squeak. James lowered his hand. The green dress fluttered harmlessly to the floor.

"Hello." Lily forced a smile and extended her hand. "It's nice to finally meet you Vernon." He did not accept her hand.

"You're that mad sister Petunia was telling me about, aren't you?" he demanded, eyeing her suspiciously and keeping his distance. "The one in rehabilitation school for the criminally insane?" His eyes flicked briefly to the fallen green dress.

"Criminally insane?" said Lily, huffily.

James leapt to his feet, his eyes blazing. "You take that back!" he said angrily, glaring at Vernon. Harry winced. No, this didn't look familiar at all… "Just who do you think you are? You can't talk to her that way!"

"James," said Lily sharply. James was either ignoring her, or was too angry to hear anything but Vernon's insults. Harry could sympathize all too well.

"I am Vernon Filbert Dursley, soon to be the Assistant Junior Associate Assistant to the Vice Chairman or Grunnings Drill Company," he said, puffing himself up very importantly. Petunia looked up him with a sudden outpouring of starry eyed admiration on her sea foam green face. Harry made a gagging noise that no one could see. "And just who are you? One of her freaky friends? Just what were you doing to that dress?"

"I was improving it," said James. "Though it's so ugly, I might as well not have bothered."

"I think it's a beautiful dress," scoffed Vernon. "Very…feminine." Lily coughed loudly into her hand, probably masking a laugh. Petunia looked enraged. She buried her face in Vernon's chest and wailed theatrically.

"Oh, she's always like this!" moaned Petunia. "Coming home with all of her—weirdness and ruining my life, and now…" Petunia's lower lip trembled. "She's trying to destroy my wedding!"

"There, there, dear," said Vernon, patting her on the shoulder. "Now you two—" He turned to James and Lily. "—should leave at once. You have no right to come in here and upset her like this." Harry was surprised at Vernon's resolve. He was usually terrified of anything resembling magic, wizards, or wands. Maybe he did not have the proper conception of exactly what he was dealing with…yet.

James was still fuming. "That's ridiculous. This is Lily's house just as much as it is hers!" He pointed an accusatory finger at Petunia.

Vernon stepped towards James, in front of Petunia. "Now I don't want to have to hurt you," he said, drawing himself up to full height. "But the two of you should leave now. You obviously don't belong here."

"My parents invited us here," snapped Lily.

"Probably too afraid of you and your—strangeness—to turn you out properly," he growled. Lily's jaw dropped and she stared at him in shock.

"Excuse me?" she said finally, aghast.

"You heard me," said Vernon. "You are obviously some kind of freak. Take your friend and leave now."

James had clearly had enough. He whipped his wand out. Less than a second later, Vernon Dursley was hovering in the air near the ceiling, spinning like a top, thus fulfilling every deliriously happy fantasy Harry had ever had.

"Apologize," said James in an extremely calm voice, considering the situation. Petunia and Vernon were screaming in absolute terror. Lily was looking very torn between amusement and horror. Harry split the difference and cackled hysterically.

"I'm—sorry!" sputtered Vernon. James hesitated for a moment.

"James!" scolded Lily. James sighed and dropped Vernon unceremoniously onto the bed, which creaked loudly in protest.

"I think it's time for you to leave," said James pleasantly, as if nothing had happened. "And if you ever say anything like that again, I'll turn you into a pig. Well—a real pig, which may or may not be more of a pig than you already are."

Vernon sputtered a furious amount of gibberish. He looked absolutely terrified. He muttered a quick goodbye to Petunia and hurried out the door. Petunia whimpered in the doorway and stared at them with wide eyes. Harry couldn't tell if she was terrified or furious. Or maybe both. She turned and stomped down the hallway, slamming the door behind her as she retreated to her room.

Lily sighed, alone once again in the room with James. And Harry, of course. Sort of.

"I can't believe you did that," said Lily.

"He deserved it," said James resolutely. Lily shook her head. "Don't tell me you didn't find that funny." Lily's mouth twitched at the corners. She turned away swiftly, hunting for something on the floor.

"I refuse to answer that, Mr. Potter, on the grounds that it may incriminate me." She swung her head around, frowning. "Have you seen my dress, James? I can't seem to find it…"

Now it was James's turn to hide a smile. "What dress?" he asked innocently. Lily picked up the white cardboard dress box and opened it. No longer empty, it contained an eerily familiar looking black business suit.

"James…" she said in a warning tone. James smiled innocently and stared at the ceiling.

Harry's head whipped around at the sound of a man bellowing in surprise and fury from somewhere outside. Harry raced to the window and stuck his head through the glass. He watched as two stories below, a very angry man raced down the street as fast as his legs would carry him.

He was wearing, Harry and quite a few people on the street noticed with great delight, nothing but a very ugly pink taffeta bridesmaid dress stretched awkwardly over his portly frame.

000

AN: I apologize for this kinda short chapter, but I haven't updated in a looooong time so I thought everyone might appreciate me posting something….anything…heh. Lupin will be back next chapter! (I know, I miss him already, too.) I thought Vernon wearing address was enough to merit an early posting. grins maliciously Yes, I am pure evil. What of it?