CHAPTER 7

Taking advantage of the captain's decision, Hoshi and the cats left the cabin together the next morning.

Hoshi was as anxious as a mother seeing her children off on their first day of school. She followed them all the way to Engineering before turning reluctantly toward the mess hall for breakfast.

She didn't see the cats the rest of the day, and she worried constantly about them. Her anxiety was greatly relieved when she found them waiting outside her cabin door eight hours later.

In the days that followed, Hoshi was amazed that no matter where the cats went during the day, they always seemed to know when it was end of shift. Each evening she'd find them lounging outside the cabin door, waiting to be let in.

Since she usually didn't see the cats during the day unless her duties took her away from the bridge, she learned how they kept themselves amused from the anecdotes crewmembers told her.

Warp Core, for example, spent most of his time in Engineering. He became the department's unofficial mascot, supervising whatever tasks were being done.

He developed a fondness for Trip's toolbox. If Trip left the box open, Warp Core would climb in and get comfortable, tucking his legs under him, and fall asleep. Trip told her that he hadn't realized how cold the metal tools were until Warp Core starting warming them up.

Torpedo, on the other hand, liked to roam the ship, despite his cautious nature.

Crewman Cunningham described how Chef would converse in French with Torpedo in the galley. The cat would meow back as if they were really talking to each other. Hoshi thought Torpedo was probably begging for a handout, but she'd never tell Chef that.

One morning when T'Pol was off duty, Torpedo showed up outside her door as she was returning from breakfast. She allowed the cat inside, and he spent two hours meditating with her.

T'Pol later told Hoshi that she was impressed by Torpedo's ability to stare at nothing unblinkingly for long periods of time. Hoshi refrained from telling her that humans referred to that particular cat phenomenon as "watching Martians."

At some point every afternoon, Torpedo would make his way to the armory, where he would curl up for a nap on the extra chair in Malcolm's office.

Phlox in particular seemed taken with the felines. He rambled on happily about them at lunch one day.

"Animals do have a place in medicine," he said as they ate. "Cats and dogs can have a calming influence on human patients, even to the extent of dropping elevated blood pressure. Warp Core and Torpedo's presence also seems to have a distracting effect on the more nervous members of the crew, taking their minds off their treatment."

Hoshi's fear that the cats would injure or kill some of Phlox's creatures never came to pass. The doctor took it upon himself to introduce the cats to all the other animals. Some of his menagerie weren't too pleased -- the bat especially recognized predators when it saw them -- but at least no one got eaten. The cats' curiosity was appeased and they showed only mild interest in the caged animals after that.

Mid-way through one boring afternoon about two weeks later, Hoshi tried to keep from yawning as she sat at her communications console. They were en route to a planet with a thriving mining industry where they might be able to restock some of their raw materials. Their metal stores in particular had taken a beating with the injector problem.

The captain called down to Engineering but before Trip could respond, a voice yelled in the background, "Look out! Warp core's going to blow!"

"Trip!" Jon said in alarm. "What's going on down there?"

Trip didn't answer. Instead, metallic crashing followed by swearing was heard on the bridge.

"Malcolm!" Jon said as he spun his chair to face the tactical station. "Sound abandon ship! We've got to start evacuating."

"Belay that!" T'Pol said, and Jon jerked his head toward her. "I have no internal readings to indicate anything is wrong with the warp engine."

From the shouts Hoshi could hear over the still-open comm link, she had come to the same conclusion, and she suddenly almost wished there really was something wrong with the warp engine.

"Then what--?" Jon began.

"Gotcha, ya little devil," came Trip's voice over the comm. "Sorry 'bout that, Cap'n. Warp Core the cat just got the rips."

"The rips?" Jon asked. "Is that another of those rodent things?"

"No, but we did catch another one of 'em today," Trip replied. "Warp Core just took off running around the engine like crazy. Rostov dropped his tool kit when Warp Core collided with his legs."

Jon cut the connection and stared at Hoshi, who was doing her best to blend in with her console the way Torpedo could with the deck plating. It didn't work. The captain's glare remained focused on her.

"The rips?" Jon asked.

"Cats do that, sir," she said. "It's a way to burn off excess energy. All of a sudden they just take off running. It's not like they play fetch or go for walks."

Jon's eyes narrowed, and she inwardly cursed her big mouth as he stood and approached her station.

"This is exactly what I was worried about when I decided, against my better judgment, to allow the cats out of your cabin," he said.

She watched as he paced to the tactical station.

"We almost abandoned ship," Jon said angrily. "Do you have any idea how much effort it takes to round up the escape pods once they've launched? Not to mention the possibility of someone getting hurt in the confusion?"

"Yes, sir. But--"

"I'm not finished!" He paced back to her station. "Whatever possessed you to name a cat 'Warp Core?'"

Hoshi looked up at him, an apologetic expression on her face. "Well, you did tell me to give them appropriate names, sir."

T'Pol spoke up. "I must point out that Ensign Sato has a point, Captain."

Jon whirled to face his first officer. She didn't back down under his glare.

"Granted, the choice of name is confusing," she said. "Perhaps if the crew is instructed to be more cautious in phrasing information..."

"And if the comm wasn't open, we wouldn't have heard it at all," Hoshi put in. "It was just a coincidence. It won't happen again."

Jon's head whipped around so he could look at Hoshi, and she saw some of his anger cool. He slowly walked back to his command chair.

"Still..." he said as he seated himself, resolve reappearing on his face.

Before Jon could finish his thought, Malcolm announced, "The turbolift has just arrived at the bridge, but whoever is inside hasn't come out."

Jon frowned. "Is there a malfunction?"

"I don't think so, sir," Malcolm said. "I'll check it."

The entire bridge crew watched as Malcolm walked over to the turbolift and pushed a button on the control panel. The door swooshed open but Hoshi couldn't see anything from her vantage point. Neither could Malcolm, apparently. She saw him glance around the interior in puzzlement -- until he looked down.

A fleeting smile crossed Malcolm's face, but he was his usual impassive self when he turned to face the captain. "I believe the rodent eradication staff has another kill to report, sir."

Torpedo trotted out of the turbolift, one of the rodent creatures clamped in his jaws.

The cat paused on the upper walk-around for only a moment before stepping down to the command level. He walked up to Jon, dropped the rodent at his feet, and sat down, looking up at the captain expectantly. Hoshi could hear Torpedo's purr all the way over at her station.

When Jon finally tore his incredulous gaze away the cat to look at Hoshi, she said softly, "He wants you to praise him, sir."

Jon looked back down at the gray-striped cat, who squeezed his eyes shut at him, purring louder.

"How...?" Jon said. "How did he know I'm the one in charge?"

"That's easy, sir," she said, knowing she was probably going to get in trouble but needing to say it anyway. "If you'll pardon me for saying so, on Enterprise, you're the Big Cheese."

"You don't know how lucky you are, Torpedo," Hoshi said as she lay on her side stroking the cat.

She looked at Warp Core lounging on the desk chair in her cabin, his front paws hanging off the seat. "And you, too, although what happened with that misunderstanding wasn't your fault."

The captain probably would have gone through the roof but for the fact that Torpedo had presented him with irrefutable evidence of his and Warp Core's usefulness. But she was still worried he might change his mind and order that the cats be confined again.

Perhaps if she could get Porthos to accept the cats, the captain would be won over completely. As she stroked Torpedo, a plan came to mind.

Hoshi waited until it was time for the captain to take Porthos on his usual evening walk.

She left her quarters carrying Torpedo, hoping she could act nonchalant when they ran into the captain. But the darn cat was heavy, and strolling along the corridors with 12 kilograms in her arms was tiresome. She put him down, hoping he'd follow her.

As she straightened up, Torpedo's ears flicked back. He turned to face the direction from which they'd come. Her own ears picked up the sound of toe nails clicking on the deck plating.

Hoshi took a deep breath as she waited for the captain and his dog to round the curve in the corridor.

Porthos appeared first, his nose twitching as he scented cat. The beagle turned in Hoshi's direction, and froze at the sight of Torpedo.

Jon stepped around the curve. He, too, froze in place. "Uh-oh," he muttered.

Torpedo sized up Porthos. He hadn't puffed up, which Hoshi took as a good sign, and he wasn't making that weird combination howl and growl cats make when they are about to fight. But his tail was switching to and fro.

"Tell Porthos to sit, sir," Hoshi suggested.

Jon nodded. "Sit, Porthos!"

The beagle didn't respond at first, but when Jon ordered him again more sternly, his rump slowly descended until it made contact with the deck.

Hoshi lifted her hand to her breast pocket, intending to produce the piece of cheese she'd brought along as a peace offering, when a hacking sound from near her feet made her glance down.

Torpedo was hunched into a compact bundle. As Hoshi watched, he issued another raspy hack, and his whole body shook. There were two or three seconds of silence. Then he hacked again...and again...and again...and again.

Porthos watched curiously, his ears cocking each time Torpedo made that terrible noise.

At last there was the sound of something being expelled, and up came the hairball.

Hoshi grimaced. "I'm sorry, sir. I'll get something to clean that up right away."

Jon paid no attention to her. He was watching Porthos slowly approach the cat. The captain was poised on the balls of his feet, ready to tackle Porthos if an interspecies conflict erupted.

Emulating the captain, Hoshi tensed, preparing to leap into the impending fray.

Torpedo, the picture of misery, was still hunched on the deck. As the dog came closer, the cat slowly squeezed its green eyes shut.

Neither pet lover expected what happened next. Porthos cautiously sniffed Torpedo's nose, then began to lick him. Tentative at first, the dog was soon vigorously licking Torpedo all over. To Hoshi's astonishment, the cat began to purr.

"Well," Hoshi said. "This is going better than I expected."

As soon as the words were out, she realized she'd let the cat out of the bag and clamped a hand over her mouth. She lifted her gaze from the animals to find Jon looking at her through narrowed eyes.

"You set this up on purpose," he said.

"Yes, sir. I did," she said sheepishly.

"It might not have turned out like this," he said, looking down at the animals. Torpedo was stretched out on his side, luxuriating under the massage Porthos was giving him.

"I know, sir," she said, adding with an impudent grin, "but it did work out."

"Lucky for you," he said sternly, but Hoshi could see a twinkle in his eye. "What did you have planned next?"

"Well, good behavior should be rewarded and reinforced. I just happen to have Porthos' favorite treat with me."

She produced the cheese from her pocket and kneeled next to the animals. Two quivering noses turned in her direction, and two sets of eyes focused on the food in her hand. She tore the cheese in two and gave each one a piece.

As Porthos gobbled his portion and Torpedo gnawed on his, Jon squatted on the other side of the animals. He scratched Porthos behind the ears and chuckled.

"I may be the Big Cheese on this ship," Jon said, "but you, Hoshi Sato, are a sneaky rat."