Heh heh. That's right, I wasn't even thinking about it, but a bunch of things came to me. So, yeah, I'm good. Tee hee!
Anyhoo, thanks for the nice reviews. I hope to make this a good fic, just for you!
A Tale of Two Idiots
Chapter 2:
One week had passed since the baseball hit both Yami and Yugi in the head. And in that week, their personalities changed drastically. They became mean and spiteful. And towards everyone, not just strangers but their friends as well. Joey was pushed down a sewer and was fished out on accident by Tristan and Otogi on their fishing trip. Sending them to the Shadow Realm was always an option, to Yami and Yugi, but terrorizing them in person was just so much fun.
And of course, they were confronted by people for their resent, destructive behavior. But the towns people's reasoning were wasted on deaf ears. It was on the following day that they decided to take their evil-making to the next step. And after hitting people, pillaging old folk's homes, and starting fires in outhouses, their friends wondered just what they meant by the 'next step'.
They answered with a quest for world domination.
And it wasn't hard for the two spike-heads, either. Seeing as how they already had the millennium puzzles, all they needed to do was utilize them in a slightly darker way. And that's what they did.
The sky grew dark, the streets cracked under the low haze of the sun, and a new era rose to meet their evil purposes. Everyone in Domino was going out of their minds with fear and hatred towards the boys. But there was nothing they could do, for the world was taking on a new leader. Or, should I say 'leaders'.
For boys who had done nothing but good all their lives, they were deliciously good at being bad. It was like everything came naturally. The oppression, the depression, the random hangings because there was nothing good on television. The world had not seen these kinds of horrors since… Well, since the 'grab and run' tactic was used by Marik and Malik.
And no one even remembered it.
As Yami and Yugi's rule reached further around the globe, it was getting harder and harder to hear and see everything they felt they needed to. So, in order to maintain control, they had other people govern different countries while they stayed in Domino. Yami and Yugi just couldn't leave this town. So much had happened and there was so much fun to be had here. They believed that the citizens of Domino were the most fun to terrorize. And no matter how many you killed, more grew back. It was like their garden of evil and that was something that could not be forsaken.
Being so that they couldn't bear to leave, they created a barrier around their castle and the inner part of the city. Like Marik and Malik had before them, they too had a castle that overlooked the city. But, being the smart ones that they were, they used the inner city as the castle's grounds. The people that lived there were less than comfortable, but at least they were protected by the castle walls from thieves in the Outer Limits. The people that used to live in the suburbs that were now the Outer Limits were miserable. Their houses were broken, rabid squirrels ran the streets and no one did anything at all.
Their Pharaohs had cast them aside like yesterday's weather report.
One the eighth day, Yami and Yugi had just woken up and already were having trouble with their plans to take over Germany and France. Two of the more 'stubborn' countries.
"I swear, those Germans!" Yami growled, tapping his finger on his hikari's head, "Why can't they just roll over and play dead like the Swedish…? Is it really so hard to let me take their country and make it into a bagel shop?"
Yugi rolled his eyes, "…"
"Well? IS IT?"
"I don't like bagels, Yami. I told you, I want Germany to be a giant ice cream shop! Bagels suck…"
"I told you that you could have France and do what you want with that. But Germany is mine." He sent a glare to his other half that ended the conversation and sat on the divan that was at the foot of his bed.
Their bedroom was draped in the finest silks from India and dream catchers of all colors that Yugi had made by young children, working all day in sweat shops. It was no loss to him if children wasted their lives away in factories just to make him extra sheets.
Yami looked down at his millennium puzzle, tracing the lines with his fingers, "… And that reminds me. Have we recovered the last of the millennium items, yet?"
"Eh, I don't think so, Yami." Yugi thought for a moment before screaming something towards their open door. In a flash, a young girl appeared, dressed in an gray and yellow uniform. The new colors for servants of the castle.
"Y-Yes, my Pharaoh?" She panted, bowing before them.
Yugi answered with a question of his own, "How many of the millennium items have we found today?"
"Ah… None, my Pharaoh. W-We haven't been able to get the rings or rods. B-But we do have the rest…!"
"Oh, how nice." Yami's voice dripped in sarcasm, "We have the rest. You really are doing such a good job."
She beamed. "Thank you, my Phara-"
"STOP!" Yami raged, throwing a apricot at her head. It hit her dead on and she fell back onto the floor, squeaking. "I was joking, you idiot! I want the rings and the rods by the end of the week!"
"But, Pharaoh Yami, we have no idea where the holders of the rings are! No one has seen them since Tuesday. And the rods… why, they could be anywhere!"
Yami nodded, "They could be anywhere. And by the end of the week, I want them in my hand or yours is coming off!"
"M-My hand…?" She gasped and looked at her palms, "My Pharaoh, I scratch with these!"
Yugi yawned, stretching out his arms and looking out the window, "I suppose your butt will have to itch, then. You heard my yami so go do it!"
She held in a pained sob, turning and briskly walking out. The door was shut behind her and Yugi stole a glance at Yami, asking, "Why is it so important that we have them all, anyway? We have the puzzles and they're the only real power that matters. Who cares where Ryou and Bakura have gone to?"
"We should. Do you remember when Marik and Malik actually succeeded in world domination?"
His Light shuddered.
"That noted, do you now remember how they lost control? They left loose ends. They thought 'who cares' about some very important people and left it to chance. We're not going to follow in their footsteps. We need everyone under our thumb. That's why we must find the rest of those goofy ex-friends of ours. And that's why we didn't leave the Kaiba brothers out in the open. Everything has to be on lock-down."
"And once they are…?"
"And once they are, we will be in complete control of the planet. Not just the western or southern hemisphere, either."
"Hmm…" Yugi nodded, grinning. "I wonder if Marik and Malik even care that we're ruling the world…"
In the Outer Limits, just outside the walls of the palace, was a picture of despair. The Pharaohs' soldiers roamed freely, harassing the people for pure amusement. The houses were raided by bunches of thieves and rouges. Nothing was really safe here.
From down the street came a small bus. Bopping along, puttering and almost not making it to the desired stop. When it came to it's halt, however, two blonde boys jumped out and onto the sidewalk.
"Ah! I'm so glad to be back in Domino…" Malik sighed, holding his hands behind his back. He watched his yami get off after him and they both turned around at the same time.
"Oh my Ra…!" The boys gasped.
The house that they had left about a week ago was not there any longer but replaced with something old and ugly. A home that looked about a hundred years old. Their grass was a dingy brown and their lawn gnomes were covered in moss and rust.
Marik blinked, tilting his head to see the rest of the street. Much to his surprise, every other house was like that, as far as the eye could see.
"What the hell happened?"
"I dunno." Marik shrugged, walking for the door, "Maybe it's an April Fool's Day thing."
Malik sweatdropped, "We haven't been gone that long…! And why would people play a prank on every house in the neighborhood?"
His question went unanswered as Marik opened the door and found, to even more of their surprise, a house with people in it. And of course, it would be one thing if hobos happened to inhabit their home, but these were people they knew and therefore this was an outrage. In what used to be their living room now resided a blonde, a dice duelist, and a boy with an odd haircut.
"Eh heh heh. Hey guys!" Joey waved to them, using what he thought was his cutest and most undeniable grin, "How you doin?"
Marik scowled, tapping his foot on the floor, "Get out of our house."
"Aw, c'mon!" They shouted.
"Now!" Marik stomped his foot. Which scared the boys into hiding behind the tattered sofa.
Malik raised an eyebrow now, just noticing how awful the inside of the house looked. Everything was ripped and torn. "Oh Ra, did you guys do this…? This house took me forever to decorate! Do you know how many stores I had to go to for the right curtains to match the carpet?"
"Uh…" Otogi scratched his head, "Five?"
"Ten! And I still didn't get the material I wanted! I had to special order! From Nepal! And don't even get me started on the couch covers!"
"Malik, will you calm down?" Marik rolled his eyes.
"And you know that woman at the Pier 1 store? Yeah, she's jealous that I got the last maroon table cloth. She wanted it. But you know, I dove for it and she just slid down the aisle, so I won. Ha."
"…"
"But now look at this place! Where am I going to find another maroon table cloth in this fashion disaster of a town? You all suck big time."
Marik blinked, "… Anyway. I shouldn't even be dealing with this. I'm tired, so you guys get out and maybe I'll forget to send you to the Shadow Realm later."
"Ugh, wait a minute!" Tristan waved his arms, "We can't go out there! We're wanted men!"
Otogi pointed an accusing finger, "And so are you! How'd you get in the house without the Spike Patrol seeing you?"
"… Spike Patrol?" Marik and Malik looked at each other.
"Yami and Yugi's army!"
"…" There was a moment of silence before Marik and Malik broke out in hysteric laughter, "Ah ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!"
Joey frowned, "It ain't funny, you guys really need to tell us how you weren't taken away! They've been looking for you guys like nobody's business! And of course, they've been looking for Ryou and Bakura, too."
When they continued to laugh, Otogi asked, "What's wrong with you? This is serious! Where have you been hiding the last week?"
Marik wiped a tear from his eye, "Ah ha… We haven't been hiding anywhere. We were in Aruba to do some research on peanut butter. It's our next world domination idea."
Tristan wanted to ask them something, but he was afraid he might actually get an answer. So, instead, he decided to catch them up on everything that's happened in the past week. He guessed that Yami and Yugi's reign hadn't reached Aruba yet. When he explained about how the boys' had somehow become different and evil, Marik almost could not believe his ears. Malik was fixated on the fact that Yami forced everyone in his palace to wear yellow and gray.
"Those do not go together. What's Yami thinking?" Malik mused to himself.
"Not now!" His yami growled, "So, lemme get this straight… Yami and Yugi aren't their disgustingly good selves and they've taken over the world, using millennium magic? And now they're looking for the other items?"
"Maybe yellow and a metallic… That might look nice."
Joey ignored Malik's comments and turned to Marik, "Yeah, that's right. They've been looking for you two since Wednesday and you were gone. And then Ryou and Bakura disappeared."
"You'd think with all that leather Yami wears, he'd have a better since of style."
"Well, I'm not standing for this!" Marik stood up, "What the hell is that boy's problem? I'm the only one allowed to take over the world! I'm the only one who disserves it!"
"It might be some sort of torture, I suppose-"
"Malik, shut up!"
"Meep…"
Marik turned to the window, now seeing the large golden walls protecting the inner city and the palace itself. He huffed, "No way, Yami. He's not moving in on my territory!"
"That's right!" Tristan shook his fist, "We've gotta get them back to normal! Whatever happened, we've gotta get them back! They're our friends, we owe them at least that much."
"Pheh." Marik grabbed his hikari's wrist and headed for the door, "No way. You fools can stay here. This is something me and Malik need to handle."
"What? But-"
"Marik, I don't want to do anything…!" Malik whined, "I wanna fix my house!"
"And I want a pony, but we can't all have everything. Let's go, Malik." That was the end of that for the moment as the hikari was dragged out the door.
"What's he thinking?" Otogi cried out in disbelief, "He'll be killed if the Spike Patrol see them!"
Tristan shrugged, "You're right. It's like suicide. I guess we should go and stop them…"
Both Joey and Otogi nodded.
"But, first, let's party!" Tristan pulled out a bottle of Sherry, "Whoo-hoo!"
"WHOO-HOO!"