… Ahem. Well, no worries, cause I will. That's evolution, you know? Like, at the start of a story, you'll be a 'so-so' writer. And by the end you could be a 'uber hilarious' writer! Anyone ever had a fic like that? I did!
… I think I might've had a few… But, I dunno. Maybe it was just my imagination.
A Tale of Two Idiots
Chapter 9:
It was now about an hour into the movie and the only people who weren't entranced in the movie were the people in the second and third row. Including the two Egyptians, a few inmates, an irritated general and the silly assistant manager of Happy Chicken.
"Marik, will you get serious." Malik twisted his mouth, his whisper a bit harsh, "I mean, just look at this place…! Guards are everywhere, there's no way we can get out of this room, unnoticed."
"… You are such a negativity spreader." His yami shot back, "Why can't you be positive?"
"Why can't you be sane?"
Marik's eye twitched.
"A-And, on top of that, you've just said we're going to break out in front of two people who are on Yami's side!" Malik motioned towards Heidi, who was watching them and Cody who was watching Heidi.
"Me?" Heidi's high-pitched squeal was music to the swooning Cody's ears, "You think I'm on the Pharaohs' side? They want to cut off my hands!"
Malik blinked, "But, you're their general, right? Shouldn't you show some kind of allegiance?"
"I hate to think of what kind of backstabbing went on when we were ruling." Marik said in his hikari's ear.
"Well…" Heidi bit her lip, looking down for a moment, "This… this is a bit unorthodox, I'll admit. Um, no one's… I mean… Oh, Cody, what do you think about this? I mean, we could get in big trouble for not saying anything."
Upon hearing her voice, Cody blinked, coming out of his provocative daydream. He looked at Heidi and although he didn't hear what she said, his answer was simple, "… Oh! Whatever you say, Heidikins, ah yup yup!"
She growled, but turned her attention back to the boys, "Ah… my lips are sealed, but don't tell anyone that I knew! Don't you ever." Heidi jerked her thumb in Cody's face, "And I don't care what you say about him."
Cody grinned, "Ya say that cause ya want me."
Heidi turned away in disgust.
"Aight, den, whas da plan, Rod Man?" Hott Dawg turned his attention to the slightly taller blonde.
"Okay, first we just need to get out of this room. Uh, Corn, I need you and Twirls to start a distraction in here, to hold these guards' attention. Then me, Malik, Hot Dawg, Boxxbaby, Peeps and Ron will sneak out."
"But there's more than likely to be more guards out there." Malik informed him. "And what happens if we get caught or something?"
"You know, you worry too much. We'll just play it by ear."
Back in the city of Domino, under the Pharaohs' palace in the jail cells, the boys that sat in the third cell were waiting patiently for Mokuba to finish what he was doing. But, of course, some were being more patient than others.
"I'm tired of holding this, Mokuba." Kaiba shot his brother a look. He, along with Joey and Tristan had been sitting in a line for almost an hour, now, holding their hands out as the yarn unraveled and Mokuba knitted it into a long scarf.
He smirked and continued his knitting, calmly, "Oh, Seto, c'mon. Just relax, I'm almost done."
"Yeah, well, this is sissy stuff." Joey pouted, "Why can't we do something manly… like eat doughnuts or make people touch our underwear?"
Kaiba raised an eyebrow and decided not to ask.
Tristan shook his head, "Joey, you're still doing that crap?"
"Eh he he he…!" Joey giggled, immaturely, "Well, there was this one old lady last month who asked if she could-"
"Oh, I don't want to hear it!" Kaiba shouted.
"Ah, shut up, money bags. You're just jealous cause no old ladies ask to touch your underwear."
Before a reply could be voiced, Mokuba held up his multi-colored scarf and smiled, "Okay, all finished!"
All three teens looked at it. It was about ten feet long and very dapper looking. The boy grinned and turned the opposite way, facing towards the barred window that faced out of the palace, eye level with the ground. He whipped it around his head, three times and threw it between two of the bars. When it came down the other way, he grabbed it and tied it around the half that he had in his hand. When it was pulled tight, he looked back at the other boys who had their heads tilted in the same direction.
"What are you doing, Mokuba?" Tristan was the first of three to ask that question.
"Ha ha!" He grinned, "I figure if we all pull on the scarf really hard when it's tied to the bars, they'll break and we can squeeze out! Wanna give it a try?"
"Hey! You are a genius!"
"Yeah, like your peanut head brother." Joey giggled under his breath.
Kaiba heard it all too clearly, but decided that it wasn't worth saying anything to. He grabbed hold of part of the scarf and scowled back at the other two teens, "Well? Are you going to help or not?"
"Oh…! Yeah!" They said and grabbed a hold behind Kaiba.
"Okay, everyone ready? Heave!"
They pulled.
"Ho!"
They pulled again.
"Heave!"
Again.
"Ho!"
Finally, it was one more 'heave' until they yanked it extremely hard and two bars fell out of the four-barred window. They fell to the ground and the four boys cheered in victory.
"Alright, guys, let's go!" Mokuba showed off his famous cutie-pie grin and proceeded to climb atop his brother's shoulders to reach the window. Just barely squeezing through, he plopped out onto the soft grass surrounding the palace. He looked around and saw lights coming from one side and complete darkness, the other.
He stood up and looked back down into the cell window, "Come on, we can't wait… too… long…? What are you doing?"
All three teens were trying to climb over each other and none could get out. Mokuba now doubted they could get out even without trying to kill each other. The hole was much too small and he realized that now.
"Ouch! Kaiba, move your fat head!"
"Who're you calling fat, mutt? Dare you to try and pinch an inch!"
"Grr… Alright, alright, you three cut it out." Mokuba whispered, harshly, "Look, this isn't going to work. I'm going to go see if I can finagle a key from one of the guards, come back and let you out that way. Wait here and be silent."
As he disappeared into the darkness, Kaiba folded his arms, pouting, "Where does that runt get off telling me what to do?"
"Ready?" Marik whispered to Corn and Twirls who were both sitting at attention in their chairs. They had switched places with Ron, Hott Dawg, Boxxbaby and Peeps so that they could be in the back and ready to leave with Marik and Malik if his plan worked.
"Readah, Rod Man!" Corn whispered back. Marik nodded, and thus began the distraction.
Suddenly, Twirls stood up, looked directly at Corn and yelled out, "Hey! You no-good pig! That's MY popcorn! And you can't have it!"
Corn hid his grin, standing up as well, "Well, what are ya gonna do about it?"
"I-I'm gonna…" Twirls looked down at the palm of his hand to remember the line that Marik wrote for him, "Oh, yeah! … I'm gonna ring your neck, you corn-sucking armadillo!"
"Bring it on!"
Before anyone knew it, they both were involved in a fist-to-fist fight on the ground, wriggling around in a spilt bag of popcorn from the concession stand. Everyone gasped and hooted 'Fight! Fight! Fight!'. The guards rushed from their posts by the door and tried to break it up.
"It actually worked?" Malik asked, eyes wide.
Marik grinned, "See? Eat your heart out, Malik Ishtar."
The hikari sighed as he along with the other guys followed his yami out of the side door, they were careful not to be noticed but it wouldn't be a problem anyway. The fight was very convincing and held the people's attention. Before the door closed shut, Malik caught a glimpse of Heidi and Cody who were waving as they left. He smiled and waved back.
They made their way down the hallway and stood up.
"Okay," Marik nodded to Hott Dawg, "You've gotta lead us to the compound door. We haven't been here long enough to now exactly where it is."
"Yeh, man, right throu here." He began to walk down the corridor and the rest followed.
Malik swallowed hard and tapped his yami on the shoulder, "Marik, I don't want to go back to that chicken death compound. It's nasty and gross and awful!"
"C'mon… Last time you were there, you were all 'boom' and 'boom'. So, lighten up and with our luck this'll be the last time we have to go there."
"Yeah… You're forgetting, our luck is often tainted with failure-"
Just as the boy was finishing his negative sentence, Marik clamped his hand over his hikari's mouth. They hid in the shadow of the wall as two guards went running down the hallway, shouting, "There's a prison break in progress! Someone get the warden!"
When they passed by, Hott Dawg cursed under his breath, "Damn it… I knew dey catch on. C'mon, den. We betta hurry afore dey get Happy Chicken Man. Dis way!"
They all ran towards the compounds door, throwing it open and rushing out.
Meanwhile, in the top office of Happy Chicken, the warden was in his office entranced in a book that he was eagerly reading. Suddenly, a forceful knock pounded on the door and the man almost dropped his porno magazine. He hurriedly put it away into the bottom drawer and shouted, "Ah, come in! But it better be good!"
"S-Sir, sir!" A guard came in, a worried look on his face, "We have a problem. There was a fight in the Mess Hall-"
"Oh, come on. There are fights every week. What was it, another popcorn fiasco? You interrupt me for this?"
"But, Happy Chicken Man, Marik and Malik are missing! We have reason to believe that they, along with a few other inmates, are escaping and going through the compound!"
"WHAT?" He stood up and slammed his fist down on the intercom button. A loud ring echoed through the hallways as well as outside the building. He shouted into the speaker, "ATTENTION, WE HAVE A JAIL BREAK IN PROGRESS! LOCK ALL DOORS AND KEEP WATCH OVER THE COMPOUND!"
Happy Chicken Man turned to the guard that was shivering in his boots, "Hurry and release our secret weapon!"
"What? B-But, sir, we c-"
"DO IT!"
"Yes, sir! Right away, sir!" He nodded and stuttered, fumbling out of the room and down to the compound security room.