Author's Note: This part takes place during "Return of Thunder, Part One" and is told in Blake's voice. I'm running on memory here, so don't expect dialogue to match exactly. © May 2004.

Blues

Part Five: Small Steps

It only takes me about fifteen minutes to reach Storm Chargers, but anxiety keeps me a good fifty yards away from Kelly's shop.

I know she's in there. I can see her van in the parking lot.

I stand safely across the street, cursing my sudden attack of cowardice.

This really is sad. Me, a ninja warrior, procrastinating like this. I want to go in there. Really, I do. I want to face her. I want to apologize. I want us to start over.

But I'm scared. I'll admit it, to myself at least. I'm scared that she's still angry with me. That she won't forgive me. That I've ruined any chance we could've had…

Blake, stop being such a wimp! Hunter is waiting for you to get back, so you can settle the score with Lothor once and for all!

I finally get the nerve to cross the street, pulling my dirt bike along with me, as movement in the back of the shop draws my attention. I blink in surprise as Tori exits from the employees' door, a dirt bike in tow.

I'm so surprised I almost forget to finish crossing the street. Since when is she into riding? Is she seriously going alone? For a novice, that could be dangerous.

She loads the bike into her van, and pulls out of the parking lot. I stare right at her as she passes by, but she gives no indication that she sees me.

Grinning mischievously, I hop on my bike and follow her.

I've got to hand it to her. She's pretty good!

I follow her through the grassy hills, jumping over a shallow creek. This is definitely a challenging ride. Really, she should've brought Dustin along. Or if she just had to ride alone, she should've stuck to a dirt course. Riding through a forest is tough even for pros. Obstacles pop up out of nowhere. A branch, a stone, a surprised squirrel; any of those could be deadly.

Eager to get closer, I use a downed tree for a ramp. It's a tricky move, but not something I haven't done before. I'm then catapulted into the air, landing nearly at her side.

She turns her head toward me. And then, she speeds up. It's like she's… running away from me. I watch, stunned, as she tears through the forest recklessly, trying to dodge me by heading into a cluster of trees.

What the hell is she thinking? Those trees are way too close together to navigate through at these speeds! Didn't she see the Endor chase scene in "Return of the Jedi"?

Then, the unthinkable happens. I watch, breathless, as the back of her bike rears up and flips over, tossing Tori off like a raging bronco. She tumbles down the hill, throwing up leaves and clouds of dust.

I snap out of it, chasing her down the hill. She finally stops rolling as the ground evens out a bit, and I stop abruptly, setting the kickstand on my dirt bike.

Then she picks herself up, and I'm able to breathe again.

To my surprise, she takes a defensive stance.

I can't describe how crushing that is. I mean, how could she still think I'm out to get her? I know we didn't exactly part well, but still…

I pull off my helmet, trying my best to keep my face impassive.

She gasps, and to my relief, relaxes. "Blake? What are you-? How did-?" She stops stammering, narrowing her eyes. "You… jerk! I thought you were one of Lothor's goons!"

She really does look surprised to see me. Surprised… not disgusted. I honestly thought the blue suit would've been a dead giveaway. And I can count it in my favor that she doesn't still count me as one of 'Lothor's goons.' Maybe I have a chance here.

I can't resist a smug grin. "Since when do they ride dirt bikes?"

She looks away, and unless my eyes deceive me, color pools on her pale cheeks. She's so cute when she blushes…

"You never know," she retorts, still avoiding eye contact. "Besides, the way you appeared on the hill next me was just screaming threat."

Now it's my turn to feel sheepish. I probably shouldn't have pulled that trick. But hey, what red-blooded guy can resist showing off when the girl he likes shows an interest in the sport he excels at?

"Sorry about that," I offer, climbing off my bike. "But you're tough to keep up with. Since when do you ride dirt bikes?"

She watches me warily as I approach, so I stop in my tracks. She's obviously uncomfortable, her blue eyes darting around to get a better look at the surrounding woods as if she's expecting Kelzacks to jump out at her.

Then, she sighs quietly, and starts picking forest debris from her hair. "Since Cam built the Tsunami Cycles," she explains coolly. "Dustin taught me a few months back, and I decided to refresh my memory."

I can't help but notice her gaze is fixed on the long hair swept over her shoulder as she carefully extracts twigs and clumps of dirt. Something tells me she's not telling the whole story, but who am I to call her on it?

"So that's Dustin's bike?" I comment casually.

Then, Tori gasps. "Dustin's bike!" she shrieks, eyes wide. I follow as she hurries up the hill, searching for the glint of sunlight hitting metal to distinguish it from the branches and rocks littering the ground. Soon, she finds the mangled bike, and falls to her knees in front of it.

"Dustin's gonna wring my neck!" she grumps, dragging the bike away from the large boulder it had struck.

"Here, let me help," I insist, gently nudging her aside. I can feel her gaze on me as I set the bike upright, and assess the damage. "It's not so bad," I assure her. "It won't take much to get her running again."

I look up at her, seeing the faint suspicion in her eyes. She still doesn't trust me. She really has no reason to.

But I want her to.

"I can fix it," I offer. "If you've got some time."

She stares at me for a few moments longer, and then finally gives me a shallow nod.

I start moving toward my own bike, listening to Tori's footfalls just behind me. I lean the damaged bike on the grass carefully, and turn to dig through a small case attached to mine.

"A tool kit?" Tori murmurs.

"Never leave home without one," I joke, spreading out the needed tools. "Hunter and I have become a bit more… mobile after Lothor trashed the Thunder Ninja Academy. Since we move around so much, we need to bring some basic supplies with us."

That eerie silence gathers again. I focus on fixing the bike, though I'm conscious of Tori's every move. She sits down across from me, her gaze hesitant and her bottom lip trapped by her teeth.

I glance up at her, giving her another grin, but I leave it to her to open up a conversation.

Finally, she does. "You know, I didn't think you were coming back."

I pause, looking up again. She averts her gaze, instead watching her fingers twist the long blades of grass.

"Why'd you think that?" I wonder.

"When you left, you didn't say that you'd come back. You just said… 'goodbye.' And then two weeks went by without a word; I figured you'd moved on."

I wince as her words bring me back to our last encounter: that stunningly awkward meeting at the beach. Everything was still so… raw. The guilt of lying, the outrage at being manipulated, the confusion after realizing how wrong Hunter and I were… I could hardly see straight.

And then I saw Tori with that surfer, and… well… nothing came out right.

Now's my chance to say what I'd intended to say two weeks ago, if I can get the words out of my mouth.

"We left because we had to sort things out," I explain, carefully keeping my eyes on my work. "Hunter and I… we've been barking up the wrong tree for a long time. We needed to retreat and regroup. Get our heads together." I wipe my hands on my pants' leg. "But we couldn't leave permanently; we have too much unfinished business."

Her gaze hardens. "So that's why you followed me out here? For 'unfinished business'?"

Okay… when you put it like that it does sound pretty cold.

"I followed you out here because I wanted to talk to you."

She watches me for a long moment. When she finally replies, her voice is soft. Hesitant. "About what?"

Here's my opening. It's now or never…

I look her square in the eye, and swallow to moisten my scratchy throat. "I want to apologize." Funny how lame that sounds, when you add up everything I did wrong since Dustin first introduced us. "I met you under false pretenses, and I spent time with you with an ulterior motive. I'm really sorry, Tori. You didn't deserve being used like that, and honestly… it was the most shameful thing I've ever done."

I take a slow, cleansing breath. There, I said it. The apology I've been crafting for two weeks. I hope it sounds sincere enough. I hope it's… more than just words to her.

She blinks several times in a row, her lips shuddering. It looks like she wants to say something. Frankly, I'm nervous as I wait for her to either accept or reject my apology.

Instead, she purses her lips and jumps to her feet.

"Tori!" I call, startled as I stumble to follow her.

I don't have to go far. We're only a few yards from the bikes when she whirls around, liquid eyes boring into me. "Why did you do it, Blake? Why did you manipulate me?"

Looking into her eyes right now is like staring at the sun. I feel an overpowering urge to look away, look at anything other than those watery, soft blue eyes. She's a hair's breadth from crying. She's fighting those tears with every ounce of her strength.

"I thought your sensei killed my parents," I murmur, guilt making each word taste like bile. "I needed to find Ninja Ops."

A frustrated huff as she leans closer to me, challenging me. "I know that part. I mean, why did you manipulate me? You were already friends with Dustin! There must've been plenty of schemes you could've cooked up to earn our trust!" She closes her eyes as she fights for composure. "Why did you put up that 'knight in shining armor' act? Why did you flirt with me? Why did… why did you pretend to like me?"

My complete shock must've registered on my face, because she tosses her hair over her shoulder and turns away. "Just forget it. I don't think I want to know."

My body moves way before my brain catches up. Before I know it I'm holding her wrist, keeping her in place.

The logical part of me knows Tori is a trained ninja. She can break my hold at least half a dozen ways. But she doesn't. Instead, she turns to face me, first looking down at our hands, and then up at my face.

She's waiting for me.

"I…" My tongue sits uselessly in my mouth like a slab of stone. Why is it so hard to talk? "I didn't pretend to like you."

Her eyebrow quirks, showing her skepticism. "I swear," I add adamantly. "I thought you were cute when I met you, and what I said that day at Storm Chargers, well… that came naturally."

I clear my throat awkwardly, scratching the back of my head. Why do I suddenly feel like a twelve year old kid? You'd think I've never spoken to a girl before!

"I… guess I decided to, well, focus my efforts on you because… I… well… I wanted an excuse to talk to you. And when Lothor sent down Amphibidor, it was a golden opportunity."

I sigh softly. "I didn't think about how you'd react. I didn't think about what I was really doing. All I thought about was how close I'd come to finding my parents' murderer. I needed to face the man that took my parents, Tori. That's all I could think about. There was no room in my head for anything else."

It's so hard talking passed the lump in my throat, but I force myself to continue. She deserves it. "I'm different now, Tori. I've thought about what I did a lot the past couple weeks. And the more I think about my state of mind, the more disgusted I am."

I don't know what else I can say. My head is bowed, my gaze lingering on our hands as my thumb absently kneads her pulse-point.

Finally she responds, her voice barely a whisper. "I don't know what to do."

"You can start by forgiving me."

"I want to, but… I can't ignore what happened between us." Resistance against my touch; she's pulling away from me. Disheartened, I release my grip, and watch as she wrings her hands.

"You don't know what the past two weeks were like for me." She looks up at me, blinking furiously for a few moments, before looking up at the canopy of leaves blocking much of the sunlight. "I was so hurt. Angry. I think it's safe to say you… you brought out the worst in me."

I wince at that, but I can't say it was a surprise. When I saw her at the beach, I couldn't get over how cold she was. It was a stark contrast to the cheerful girl I'd met just days earlier.

I really did bring out the worst in her. And I know exactly what it feels like, to have hate twisting inside like a snake, slowly eating away all the good in you. It's so hard to live with yourself when you can look back and see how far you've fallen. When you see what you were willing to compromise all in the name of revenge.

"But you dealt with it, Tori," I note. I smile at the surprised glance she sets on me. "If you hadn't gotten a handle on your anger, you would've cold-cocked me the second you realized who I was."

She smirks wryly, tossing her hair over her shoulder. "You have Dustin to thank for that. If I'd seen you a week ago, I probably would've done just that."

"Dustin?" I repeat, my tone incredulous. "Really?"

Amusement glitters in her eyes. "Really. He's wiser than you might think. He helped me at least consider your point of view."

My smile widens. "Then I should thank him."

"You should; and while you're there, you can explain what happened to his prized bike."

"Me? I'm not the one who rode it."

She tilts her head, looking at me through lowered lashes. "No, but if you weren't stalking me, I wouldn't have lost control."

Point: Tori. Though "stalking" is such an ugly word…

I frown deeply, as if I've just been given a death sentence. I take heart in Tori's surprised giggle at my theatrical display of dread. "Well, the more damage I fix, the less explaining I'll need to do, right?"

I return to my work in progress, and settle back down with wrench in hand. Tori sits across from me again, but the stifling tension between us is gone. The attentive gaze she settles on me isn't sharp or intense.

For once, the silence is… comfortable.

"How'd you learn to fix dirt bikes?" she wonders.

"Well, I wasn't always as good a rider as I am now," I confess with a wry grin. "In fact, the first time I decided to try a dirt bike, I wound up crashing into a fence."

"I have a hard time picturing you taking a spill," she admits.

I smile at the indirect compliment. "Everyone has to start somewhere. Of course, Hunter wasn't so understanding. It was his bike I mangled. It didn't take me long to realize that if I wanted to use my big brother's stuff, I had to return it in the shape it was in when I borrowed it. And so began my tinkering…"

I launched into the story, recounting my early adventures on the dirt tracks up north, watching her expression switch from amusement, to fascination, to… something else.

That last expression -- that tiny, enigmatic grin and half-lidded eyes -- that's the look that almost makes me forget my own name.

I don't mention Lothor, or the mission to infiltrate his ship. It's so strange; I know Tori's a Power Ranger, but I don't want to darkenour time together with talk about evil ninjas, deception, and revenge. I don't even want to think about that stuff when I'm with her, leisurely getting acquainted.

She's smiling at me. She's laughing with me. And maybe, with time, she'll really forgive me.

I know there's still a lot of work ahead of me. Considering how I humiliated her and toyed with her feelings, I'm lucky she's even talking to me.

This is just a small step towards reconciliation… and I find I'm already looking forward to the next one.

To Be Continued…