A Tale of Two Idiots

Chapter 35:

As Mokuba braced himself to be attacked again, his opponent surprised him by taking a defensive stance of his own. They stood about fifty feet away from each other, each monster trying to stare the other down but neither made a move to attack. In all honesty, Mokuba was afraid to, not only for the fear of getting himself hurt but part of him thought that Flyswatter's subconscious was still alive and could feel all the assaults on his body. Mokuba didn't want to cause him anymore pain.

"Oh, what am I gonna do…?" He whispered to himself, not taking his eyes off of Godzilla, "If I go on and attack, this guy's gonna take a butt-load of damage and it'll be all my fault…! But then… this stupid lizard won't just let me stroll to the Palace! So I gotta take him out!"

He moved his left foot foreword slightly and before he could do anything, his eyes shifted downwards to the townspeople at his feet that, from this distance, looked like little ants. They ran around in circles around his and Godzilla's feet and once again, Mokuba was overcome with guilt. It was his fault that their homes and loved ones were being destroyed. If only they didn't have to fight…

Mokuba frowned, and stood up straight. What he was about to try, he thought, would never work in a million years but he'd never forgive himself for not trying. He cleared his throat, "G-Godz…" His voice cracked and he tried again, louder this time, "Godzilla! Listen to me, okay! I-I don't want to fight anymore! People are getting hurt! I… I don't want to hurt you or anything, I never did!"

Godzilla blinked, and then snorted, "Sure. If you didn't want anything to do with me, you wouldn't be in some giant robo-suit and you wouldn't be terrorizing Tokyo."

At first, Mokuba was at a loss for words. Who knew giant lizards could speak English so fluently? I mean, everyone knows lizards speak French, but English? Come on. He shook his head lightly, "Uh, first of all, this isn't Tokyo, it's Domino."

"… This isn't Tokyo?"

"No."

The monster looked stunned for a moment before wearing a skeptical look and turned around quickly, taking out a map from a fanny-pack attached to his tail. He flipped it around a moment, muttering to himself then slowly lowered it, "Dearie me… I-It is Domino."

"Duh."

"W-Well, I'm… I'm just so embarrassed!" Godzilla blushed an even darker shade of green and tucked the map back into his fanny-pack. He twiddled his claws, "I don't know what to say… I was doing some yoga in my little cottage on Monster Island and then I got this tingly feeling in my foot and whenever that happens, I know Tokyo needs me… But I was just so flustered; I guess I went the wrong way."

Mokuba put his hands on his hips, "So… this is why you were attacking me?"

"Yes, I'm sorry. It's just…" He made a motion towards Flyswatter's body, "You look like some of the regulars I fight everyday… It was so easy to mistake you as a threat. Oh, by the way, your name is?"

"Ah… Mokuba. Mokuba Kaiba."

"Mokuba. What a cute name. Well, Mokuba, I'm very sorry… And… even though I have attacked you… and probably caused you an fair amount of pain… I-I need a favor…"

His body and muscles finally relaxed after hearing that everything kinda made sense. But now he tilted his head at this new development, "A favor? Um… alright, what is it?"

"It seems that I've exhausted myself… You really are very good at this sort of thing and it took a lot out of me, so… I'm afraid I haven't the strength to go back to my cottage…"

"Oh. Okay, well, what can I do about it?"

Suddenly, Godzilla came walking across the fifty feet of asphalt that separated them. Mokuba took a step back, wondering what he was going to do, but when he was standing next to Flyswatter's body, seemingly meaning no harm, Mokuba immediately relaxed and listened to the lizard's request.

He pointed out towards Domino Bay, "If you could just throw me part of the way, I'm sure I can make it the rest of the way."

"… Throw… you?"

Godzilla nodded and Mokuba was about to protest, but then thought better of it. He sighed and, with both hands, grabbed a hold of the lizard's thick tail. The rest of Godzilla's body thumped to the ground as Mokuba started turning around and around, desperately trying not to let go of the monster just yet. Slowly, he lifted from the ground, and when the twelve-year-old thought that he was high enough, he let him go.

Unfortunately, when he did let go, Mokuba didn't know his or Flyswatter's own strength and thrown Godzilla so far over the bay that he looked like a star, falling across the moon. And as Mokuba thought he'd just done something horrible, a distant shout reached him.

"Thank you, Mokuba Kaiba…!"

"Ah…" He blinked, "Y-You're welcome…?"

"Shut the door!"

Yami called as he and Yugi were presently running into the safety of their Palace through the back doors. As they had let the Shadow Gates open and let loose all the monsters, and they started oozing out, already set to wreak havoc upon the world and its citizens, Yami was so absorbed in his evil laughter that he failed to notice some of the monsters were heading straight for him as well. Yugi had to shake Yami out of his evil trance so that they could run away before it was too late.

Now as they ran for the closing doors, a pack of large and screeching Shadow monsters behind them, Yami and Yugi zipped in through the doors and they closed behind them, all the monsters flying into the large entrance and landing on the door, trying to pound it open.

Both Pharaohs had their backs against the doors, panting like crazy.

"Y-Yami, you almost got us killed!" Yugi shouted, his breath returning.

Yami folded his arms, smugly, "But we're alive. And that's all that matters."

"Well, I don't think-"

"Pharaoh Yami! Pharaoh Yugi!"

They stopped their conversation when a Spike Patroller came running up to them from down the hallway, waving happily. When he reached them, he wiped the sweat from his brow, "My Pharaohs, ex-general Heidi is swinging in the gallows, as per your orders!"

Yami grinned, "Wonderful. We'll be there in a second."

"Yes, sir."

"Oh. And what about what I asked for?" Yugi put his hand on his hip and held out his other hand to the Patroller, "You guys didn't forget, did you?"

At first, the Patroller was confused but then remembered and smiled knowingly, "Oh, sure! We didn't forget. The guard who brought her to the noose delivered these himself." He said while digging in his pocket and then bringing out two blue shell earrings, shaped like tulips and dropping them in Yugi's hand.

Yugi held them tightly, squealing with delight, "Eek!"

His other quirked an eyebrow at him, "Yugi… what are those?"

"Heh heh! These are… were Heidi's earrings. Gosh, ever since I met her, I've just been in LOVE with these earrings! They're gorgeous aren't they, Yami?" He hurriedly put them on, and turned to his other, smiling brightly, "Well? What do you think? Cute?"

"… I think… I should start sleeping with one eye open."

"Why, Yami?"

"No reason… Let's go." Yami shook his head lightly as he and the Spike Patroller went ahead down the hallway, towards the Great Hall and Yugi skipped after them, humming in celebration of his new found jewelry.

They came to their desired place, heading through the side door of the Great Hall that lead straight up to the stage in the center of the room. From behind the black curtain, hiding the Pharaohs and Patrollers from view of the public, they could hear they excited chatter of Domino's citizens.

Yami nodded towards the curtain, "I take it that those sounds of joy are results of Heidi's death?"

"Yes, sir. We dropped her about four minutes ago; she's still swingin' a little, if you wanna go take a look." The guard who had been emceeing the entire party was using his mic to motion out of the drapes.

"We-"

"Oh, yeah, I wanna go see!" Yugi jumped up and then raced for the curtains, pushing them out of the way and emerging on the other side. Immediately, everyone in the Great Hall stopped their jabbering and took notice of the young king who has just pounced out of nowhere.

They knelt down and bowed before greeting him all at once. "HELLO, PHARAOH YUGI."

"Hi."

A second later, Yami came out onto the stage, quickly surveying the party-attendees before his eyes wandered to center stage where a body draped in black velvet was strung up by a noose that came down from one of the stage's support beams. His features slowly transformed into a wide grin as he made his way over to the body, circling it once.

Yugi came over, looking at it for a hot second before childishly kicking the corpse. It swung backwards and knocked Yami over.

"… Oops."

"Yugi, that was uncalled for!"

"Sorry!"

"You are not sorry! Wait till I teach you what sorry means!" He called, getting up and chasing his light around and around the body, his arms and nails outstretched and Yugi flapping his arms and shrieking.

Meanwhile, not even ten feet away from the stage and the two fighting Pharaohs, there was a small group of boys who were currently attempting to comfort a man who was beyond comfort. He was on the floor, surrounded by a puddle of his own tears and the two kinder of the boys were rubbing his back, soothingly.

"Waaahhhh…! S-She was s-so young…!"

"It's okay, Cody… You let it all out…" Ryou nodded, patting Cody's hair.

"That's right." Malik nodded, laying a firm hand on his shoulder as he banged his fists and feet into the floor, continuing to fountain tears of sorrow.

Bakura, on the other hand, had been watching the man for about four minutes now, impatiently tapping his foot on the floor and suddenly bursting out, "Okay, that's enough! You two have been babysitting him ever since that girl was killed and it's getting on my nerves!"

Ryou frowned, "Oh, 'Kura, how could you say such a thing! The love of his life was just murdered." He whispered the last bit so as to not upset Cody further.

"So what? People die everyday."

Malik turned sharply to his yami and cried out over Cody's bawling, "Marik! Make Bakura stop saying those terrible things!"

Marik blinked and looked over at Bakura, who looked back. He shrugged, "He's a grown yami, Malik, there's nothing I can do."

Malik stood up, starting to get huffy, "Then what are you good for!"

"I'm good for smacking you sideways if you keep up that tone!"

"I'm not afraid of you! Nya nya!"

"…"

Just as Marik was strangling his hikari, Cody stood up shakily from his pool of tears. Both Ryou and Bakura blinked at the man's new found stability and Ryou asked, gently, "C-Cody? Are you okay?"

"Nopies…" He said between choked sobs, reaching down into his back pocket. "I-I can't believe I let 'em do it… It ain't fair… B-But Heidikins disserve to die… (sniff) with all her parts…!"

Marik and Malik stopped trying to kill each other as they watched with growing curiosity as Cody had found the thing he was looking for in his pocket. He finally pulled out a sort of bent and dirty finger; the bottom was smeared with blood and part of the fingernail seemed chipped off.

Ryou's hands flew up to his mouth as he spun around and clutched at his yami's shirt weakly, "B-Bakura… I-I think I might faint."

Bakura squinted, "Is that a crouton?"

"It's a finger!" Marik shouted.

"… Ooh, yum."

Malik shuddered, "Y-You need help…"

Boldly, Cody pushed past the ten feet of people in front of him and strutted up the right stairwell, holding the finger like a candle out in front of him. A guard whom he made his way past, called out to him, "H-Hey! You can't be up here, this is…" But it was too late and Cody was alright on the center of the stage.

He again walked right by two more people, but these two happened to be the two that owned the stage he was on as well as the rest of the world. They had been preoccupied recently, Yami beating up his young hikari for hitting him upside the head with the corpse of a dead general. He was currently on top of Yugi, straddling his hips and beating him over the head with a large deli meat.

Cody walked right past them and Yami immediately stopped his meaty assault on Yugi's head and gaped at the man standing next to the velvet-covered body.

"Cody?"

"What the hell is he doing here?" Yugi asked, holding up his bleeding head.

"H-Here ya go, Heidikins." He sobbed, ignoring the two and grabbed the left arm of the corpse, lifting it to replace the finger. But, to everyone's surprise, the hand was fully-fingered. Cody blinked, confused, and then lifted the other arm. That one had all the fingers too. "What the…?" Before really thinking about it, Cody pulled off the sheet to reveal… some guy.

Malik blinked, "And who the hell is that?"

"That's a dead guy!" Bakura pointed at the stage.

Everyone groaned.

Ryou shook his head, sadly, "My poor yami…"

"What? What'd I do?"

"Nothing, Bakura, forget it…"

On the stage, Yami's eyes were as big as flying saucers as he stood, starring at the man who was hanging from the noose, his reddish-brownish bangs brushing against his forehead lightly.

Cody gasped, "This ain't Heidi!"

"What was your first clue?" Marik called out from the audience.

Yugi looked at the man for a minute before realizing that he wore a Spike Patroller uniform. He pointed this out to his other half and Yami's eyes began scanning the room, seemingly searching for something. Suddenly, his gaze settled at the back of the Great Hall at a Patroller who was quietly cleaning up some of the mess on the ground.

Yami turned to the guard behind him, "That one over there. Is he the one who delivered 'Heidi' to the stage?"

"Uh. Yeah, I think that's him."

He motioned across the room for the guard to come over and he noticed, seeming rather glum and wandered through the crowded space until he was on stage, the episode being watched by thousands, eagerly awaiting what would happen next.

"Y-Yes, my Pharaoh?" He asked, meekly, taking a great interest in the floor.

Yami's voice took on a dangerous tone, "Where the hell is Heidi and who is this?"

"Uh… well, uh… You see-"

"Wait a minute, isn't that your partner?" Yugi piped up, "Yeah, he is! What kind of sicko are you?"

"A-Alright! I admit it! I'm sorry, but he was just so annoying…! He wouldn't shut up and furthermore he smelled like fish! So, yeah, I swapped him out for the general, what's the big deal? Knowing you two, he'd have been dead in a week anyway." The guard shouted, shaking his fist over at the corpse.

Both Pharaohs blinked then shrugged, "Yeah, he's probably right."

"Where's Heidi?" Cody asked.

"Eh, dunno. The little witch kicked me and ran away. I didn't go after her cause Alf was on."

There was a bit of silence before Cody nodded and jumped off the stage, running and maneuvering through the confused crowd of people. Ryou looked over, calling after him, "Where are you going?"

"I have no idea!" Cody called back happily, exiting the Great Hall, "But Heidi be alive! She be alive!"

"… Well, that was odd."

Unbeknown to the rest of the group, Marik's anger had been secretly boiling for some time now. He had been sulking while everyone was so wrapped up that some girl who they didn't even know was alive. Well, finally he just couldn't take it anymore. There was one thing that mattered and one thing only.

"YES! OKAY! THE FINGERLESS GIRL HAS RUN OFF AND THOUGH SHE'S PROBABLY BEING BRUTALLY ATTACKED BY RABID HOWLER MONKIES AS WE SPEAK, YOU'RE ALL SO HAPPY!" Marik shouted at the top of his lungs, scarring everyone in the room except Malik who was used to such childish behavior from his darker side, "But I'm not happy! Wanna know why? Because that stupid, ugly Pharaoh has my millennium rod and I'm ready to rip off his hikari's legs and bash his head in with them!"

Yugi squeaked, hiding his legs.

Yami shouted back, "Just who are you calling ugly?"

"YOU!"

"Pheh! Fine, Marik! Want some? Get some!"

"My pleasure!" He growled before knocking a few people out of the way and climbing onto the stage. He was now about five feet away from Yami and there was a moment of tense silence where nothing but tension filled the air. In a second, the silence was broken by two shrill screams and both Marik and Yami went running to each other, meeting the other with girly slaps and hisses.

Everyone blinked.

As their sissy-fight continued, Malik had made his way onto the stage and he was currently standing next to Yugi as they watched their yamis in the fiercest battle of their lives.

Marik had been pulling viciously on Yami's hair, yanking his head down with it. Yami scratched at Marik's hands, crying out, "Ow, ow! Marik, you fat cow, I just conditioned!"

"Shut up!" He only pulled harder, causing some of Yami's hair to fall out. Realizing his precious locks were in danger, the Pharaoh kicked Marik in the groin and his grip on Yami's hair lessened as he sank to the floor, doubled over in pain and holding his goodies. "Agh… T-That hurt…"

"You should've worn a cup." Malik nodded, wisely.

"Don't make me hurt you, Malik!"

"… Nya nya."

"GAH!" He lunged at his hikari and they began their senseless fighting, again, whilst Yami and Yugi laughed themselves silly.

Ryou sighed rather annoyed and called out to them, "Malik! Marik! Maybe now is not the best time to be fighting one another!"

Bakura shook his head, "And they think I'm stupid."

Wandering by the Palace's back door was Heidi. What had happened with that guard was really just a big blur to her now and she only remembered being led to the back of that stage and saw a noose hanging from the top. She began shaking, paralyzed with fear and looked around frantically for some way out of that predicament. But, luckily for her, the guard on her left let her go and tackled the guard on her right with a large black sheet. They began to fight and struggle and although it seemed one of the guards didn't want to hurt her, she thought of nothing else but running away.

And so this is where she ended up.

"Hmm…" She turned around, facing the door and suddenly smiled, feeling a lot better, "This is it! This is my ticket out of this loony-bin! I-I'm free!"

Taking in a deep breath of relief, she walked straight up to it and was about to turn the handle… but not having any fingers made this difficult. She growled in frustration and tried to use the two she had left, but that didn't work. So she lifted her leg and pushed down on the handle with her foot. Finally it did open up and Heidi popped out of the castle, now standing on the grass, starring out into the still night.

Intending to enjoy her first few minutes outside the Palace walls in almost two weeks, Heidi looked around rather cautiously and then got moving, not running afraid to set off any alarm, but she sure as hell wasn't going to sit around like they did in the movies and wait for something bad to happen. She was much too smart for that.

Suddenly, from up above, a large brick fell on top of her head, causing the girl severe bleeding. The brick was then followed by two pots, a television and a rather large oyster.

"Oh, what the hell!" She cried out, rubbing her head and looked up from where she had been attacked.

A lady was bending out of a palace window and called down, "Sorry!"

"Grr…" Just as Heidi was leaving the scene of random objects, she tripped over something and fell down, bashing her head into a stone and marble-covered water fountain. "Oh my god!" She exclaimed, holding her bloodied head yet again and looking along the ground, trying to see what she had tripped on.

Right next to her foot was a golden rod, the Egyptian eye imprinted on the top and a soft glow emitting from it, barely noticeable, but in the darkness of the night, it shown. And, as she looked over, even more gold-drenched items appeared; seemingly forming a circle and the light that they cast together was brilliant.

"Ah… The millennium items? W-What are they doing out here? The Pharaohs would never leave them in the gardens, unguarded like this… Unless… someone's stolen them…" She blinked and looked around, seeing no one and then called out, "Hello? Is anybody there? … HELLO?"

Answering her call, rustling amongst the trees and bushes broke out and low growls coming from everywhere and nowhere all at the same time. And out of the blue, quick globs of darkness appeared, crawling from out of the shrubbery and from around the Palace's walls.

Heidi shrieked, now harshly chiding herself under her breath for being so stupid as to call 'HELLO' out into the darkness when there was obviously Shadow magic being put to use. Deciding not to stay to find out exactly what kind of Shadow magic, Heidi backed up slowly from the advancing forms and began to go faster but stopped and whirled around when she felt even more of them behind her. They were now on all sides and closing in fats, their grins being the only thing visible and now their open mouths, teeth glistening.

'Oh great… S-So this is how it ends, huh?' Just as she closed her eyes, bracing herself for the worst, another sound made itself known. A low rumble and then an ear-shattering scream and thud that rocked the ground and sent Heidi flying backwards until her head met the castle wall with full force. "OH MY FREAKING GOD! WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING?"

When she looked up, though it was hard to see from the heavy rushes of blood coming from her head, she blinked and gaped at seeing a twenty-foot thick ankle accompanied by a large and somewhat meaty foot standing not five feet in front of her. Apparently, the force of the foot (now joined by the other) when landing on the earth, scarred all the Shadow monsters and they had hidden or gone away, for now.

Heidi looked up, still gapping now at seeing a giant, naked fat man that she knew all too well.

"Uh… Gained a little weight there, Flyswatter?"

He didn't answer, but to her surprise, part of his forehead began to separate from the rest of his head and soon it slid open, revealing a young boy with jet-black hair down to his waist. He looked down and a small smile could be seen gracing his features. Without warning, he jumped off of the ledge of the cell and fell down about a hundred feet, then landing on the large, cushy toes and sliding of toenails under he was standing before Heidi.

"…" She blinked and started to thank him, "I… Well… you, um, saved me from those things. Thanks… But, why were you inside Flyswatter's head?"

"Flyswatter? So that's his name!" He smiled cutely and turned around, waving at the empty vessel, "Thanks for the ride, Flyswatter, you're the greatest!"

No response.

He shrugged and looked back at Heidi, though his gaze was redirected towards her fingers… or lack thereof. At first, he pursed his lips and his eye twitched but then they became large and he looked up at her, "Heidi!"

"Hah? Oh. Yeah, that's me."

"I'm Mokuba!" He laughed, "I'm so glad I found you! See, see? Told you that you'd get out with your life! And look! You still have two of your fingers left!"

"… Joy."

Mokuba smiled again, seemingly unaware of the girl's sarcasm. He looked down and once again his eyes came in contact with something familiar. "The millennium items? What are they doing out here?"

"I dunno. I just tripped over them before those monsters came… Speaking of which, we should get out of here. Those things won't stay gone for long and I doubt Flyswatter will scare them off again…" She said, scanning the area quickly, "I hate to say this, but the safest place would be inside the Palace. C'mon."

She began to walk back and was expecting him to follow suit but he busied himself gathering all the golden items into his shirt and pants. He found it strange that when he took away the rods, the glowing ring that formed around the items vanished but he paid no heed to it and soon was running after Heidi, pants and shirt full up with gold.

They both entered the way that Heidi had come out and she, once again, opened the door with her foot. And though they seemed to be back to the place of security, Heidi shuddered to herself, momentarily wishing she was back outside.

"So, Heidi," Mokuba began, waddling behind the teenager and juggling all of his treasures, "Have you seen any of the others around here lately? Um… Marik and Malik, for example?"

"… No, I haven't. I haven't seen them since Happy Chicken. But… I did see the Pharaohs earlier today. They tried to hang me about thirty minutes ago… I got away by myself," She said proudly, tilting her head to the side, "And haven't seen much of anyone since then, really. But it would make sense that those two might be here; after all, all of Domino is in the Great Hall."

"Really? Why?"

"Yami and Yugi are hosting a party."

"… I think I'm confused."

"So am I."

Suddenly, a blue and white flash appeared in front of Mokuba's eyes and it knocked Heidi over. The small boy blinked and looked down, now even more puzzled at the sight of seeing her on the floor being somewhat attacked by a white-haired man.

"Get off of me! Get OFF!"

"Heidikins, Heidikins, Heidikins!" Cody chanted in a happy tone, hugging the girl tight and against her will, "I'm so happy, I found meh Heidikins! Ah, yup yup!"

Heidi growled in frustration.

"Should I do something?" Mokuba asked lightly, holding out a can of pepper spray.

"No, no… He's just a lonely old geezer, that's all."

"Oh."

Cody smiled.

"Now get off!" Heidi stood up and brushed herself off. She frowned at Cody who did nothing but grin and so she sighed, turning back to Mokuba, "C'mon, Mokuba, we're leaving. I won't stay another second while getting molested!"

Cody was instantly at her side, "Molested, molested…!" He chanted.

"Stop that!"

"Um… wait a minute, Heidi!" Mokuba called out nervously, causing both Cody and Heidi to stop their bickering and look at him. He held out one of the rods, "I can't go. You said Marik and Malik might be at that party, I need to give them these, they might be useful."

"What? You can't be serious! That's nothing but a room full of murderers!"

"I have to." He said, the finality apparent in his voice.

Heidi groaned.

Cody blinked then smiled, "Aw, I just came from there! Ah, yup yup! I can take yas, sure thing, Kiddo!"

"Thanks! … Don't call me 'kiddo', though."

"Sure thing, Kiddo!"

Mokuba shook his head, frowning, "N-No, don't call me that. Anyway… Heidi, you're coming right? You don't want to be all alone in this castle, it isn't safe."

"Um… But… Ugh, fine. Let's go then, but if anything else happens to me, it's on both your heads." Heidi nodded and began to walk away with Mokuba and Cody following, Cody singing 'The I Love Heidi Song', the remixed version.

"Hmm… Okay, okay, I got one. I spy, with my sexy eye, something that is… blue."

"Aw, that's an easy one! Kaiba's eyes!"

"…"

"Leave me out of your stupid games!"

Both Otogi and Tristan looked at each other then back at Kaiba, who was leaning on the other wall, seemingly pissed that people kept 'spying' him. Otogi had just finished his turn and it was guessed rather easily by Tristan. They ignored Kaiba's darkening mood and continued with their game.

Joey raised his hand, "My turn, my turn!"

"Alright."

"'Kay… I spy, with my sexy eye, something that is…fruity."

"Kaiba."

"Wait, do-overs! Um… I spy something that is pale."

"Kaiba."

"I spy something that is undesirable!"

"Kaiba."

"WILL YOU THREE KINDLY SHUT UP!" The morbidly embarrassed brunette pushed himself of the wall and glared daggers at each one of them. They did shut up, but not out of fear, out of boredom. They had been sitting there ever since they had to shut the door before those monsters came. Once again they were trapped and I Spy was the first suggestion to pass the time, but it was apparent that Kaiba was sick of it.

"Well, what do you expect us to do, Kaiba?" Tristan asked, "We obviously can't go outside, those things are out there."

Otogi nodded, scooting a little closer to Tristan, "I can still here them pounding on the walls and doors…"

"… I got an idea!" Joey stood up from his spot on the floor, posing and looking heroic, "We'll go out there and fight those things!"

It was quiet for a moment.

"Okay, Joey." Kaiba said gently, and motioned towards the door, "You go out there. Give me about five minutes, so I can get my armor on, but you take a head start."

The blonde look overly excited, "Y-Ya mean it, Kaiba?"

"No. No, I don't."

It was quiet for another minute.

"… I say we go party!" Otogi folded his arms, and broke the silence with his announcement.

"Is that all you honestly think about?"

"Yeah, is there a problem?"

Joey blinked before thinking a bit and then nodding, "Y'know, he's got a point. Like a wise man once said: When all else fails, party till ya poop."

"… Who said that?"

"I just did, didn't ya hear me?"

"…"

"You know what? Partying is fine with me. Hell, we could all become mambo dancers for the FBI, I wouldn't care. I don't care about anything anymore, life has no meaning." Kaiba declared, biting the tips of his fingernails.

They all looked at each other before jumping up in the air and shouting, "Hooray for life having no meaning!" And took off down the hall.

"… Yeah."

Inside the Great Hall, all hell had broken loose on the stage and from afar it looked like some sort of weird steel-cage match. First it was Marik and Yami who were fighting rather insanely and then Marik began fighting with his hikari, and then they both attacked Yami which caused Yugi to jump in but then he and his yami began to fight so they were assaulting each other and then Ryou and Bakura thought it was only too cool, but didn't want to get their clothes dirty so they got on stage and played commentators.

"Wow, 'Kura, this is one bloody mess." Ryou spoke into the microphone and watched as Malik head bashed Yugi.

Bakura grinned, "Ooh, that's gotta hurt. And it looks like Yugi's giving up! He's waving a white fla… Oops, no, that was Marik's underwear. Are those cute, little duckies I see?"

"They're evil duckies!" Marik called out from underneath Yami, trying to defend his undergarments. "Evil duckies!"

"… I'm officially weirded out, Ryou."

"These are strange times, 'Kura."

"Give 'em the chair!" Someone from the audience called out. "The chair!"

And Yami used their suggestion, taking a metal chair from the side of the stage and banging it over what he thought would be Malik's head, but at the last second, Malik used Yugi as a shield and Yami banged him in the face with it, using all of his strength.

Everyone gasped as Yugi fell backwards onto the stage, his nose bloody and his eyes were rolling around in his head.

"Oh, poor Yugi!" Ryou said, "I think he's down for the count!"

"Anyone would be after something like that." Bakura looked on as Yugi's form was unmoving for a second, but then he began to budge, "Dear Ra… What's this? Yugi Motou's getting up! He's getting up, ladies and gentlemen! He's standing! And he looks ready for some more good old fashioned butt-kicking, this is extraordinary!"

"I've never seen anything quite like it, 'Kura! Yugi Motou is now beating the living crap out of his darker half!"

"It's amazing!"

"It's astounding!"

"WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP?" Everyone, including the boys on the stage, looked blatantly at the two, more than a bit annoyed for their overzealous observations.

They both pouted, thinking themselves to be doing a rather good job.

As the fight now raged on, no one really noticed two groups of people that came in from the back door of the Great Hall almost at the exact same time. The first group, which consisted of Cody and Heidi, followed by Mokuba, came in and all stood there for a second before moving forward towards the large crowds who were bunched and huddled against the stage.

"Wow." Heidi nodded, "So these are what the Pharaohs parties are like. I've never been to one."

Mokuba stood on his tip-toes but couldn't see over the masses, "I can't see anything!"

"Eh? Alrighty, alrighty…" Without being asked to, Cody picked Mokuba up and put him on his shoulders so he'd have a better view.

"T-Thanks, Cody!"

"No problem, Kiddo!"

"…" Mokuba decided to ignore that and looked on. Over the heads of all these people, he spotted the stage with Marik, Yami, Yugi and Malik wrestling and practically killing each other with Ryou and Bakura on the side, holding microphones. "Ah… There they are! I see them! We have to get them their rods, right now! We-"

"Mokuba!"

The boy stopped and looked back from where he heard his name being called. To his surprise, his brother along with Joey, Tristan and Otogi were coming through the doorway they had just entered and, apparently, he was the first thing they saw.

Mokuba immediately jumped off of Cody's shoulders and went running over to his big brother, who wasn't even the one who called his name, but whatever. He loved him. "Seto, Seto! I'm glad you're okay, I thought you were going to die! I rode here inside Flyswatter just to get to you!"

"… You rode in a flyswatter?"

"Not a flyswatter! Flyswatter! The giant, fat man who I fought Godzilla with!"

Kaiba looked up and then back down at Mokuba, petting his hair. Kaiba whispered to Tristan, "Kid's gone crazy."

He nodded.

"No, it's true!" Mokuba whined.

"Hey, what ya got there, Mokuba?" Joey asked, taking one of the millennium rods from out of the boy's shirt. He grinned, "Hey! Doesn't this thing belong to Marik or somethin'? Where'd you get it?"

"Joey! Give it back! I have to give it to Marik!"

A grin formed on Joey's face and he threw the rod to Tristan, who caught it and noticed Joey's little game. He grinned back and threw it back to Joey.

"You guys!" Mokuba reached for but as it was thrown back to Tristan, he realized he was too short to do anything, "Please, give it back!"

Joey caught it again and Mokuba was about to snatch it, but he threw it at the last minute. Unfortunately, he threw it too far, and it went sailing over Tristan's head along with everyone else's.

"… Oops."

"Oh, way to go, Joey!"

Over on the stage, the battle between the two hikari and yami pairs was going strong and no winner was apparent. It seemed too close to call and everyone watched, some people betting that the Ishtars would kick butt and some betting that the Pharaohs would reign supreme. But what no one was expecting was a golden, stick-like thing to come flying out of nowhere and knock Pharaoh Yami right in the back of the head.

"Ack!" He shouted, then falling to the ground. Not making another move.

Yugi blinked, "Um… Yami?"

Marik looked at the thing that had just beaned his rival, "My rod! Ha ha! I knew it'd come back to me! Take this, you midget!" Without another word, Marik twirled it in his fingers and bashed Yugi in the back of the head with it. His eyes rolled back in his head as he fell to his knees and then the ground, out cold.

"…" Malik walked up next to his other, "Don't you think that was a little cruel?"

"You're next if you don't stop questioning my methods."

"Huh?"

Suddenly, a guard ran on stage from out in the hallway, panting and gasping for breath. He stopped right in front of Marik and Malik and looked down at the spiky-haired boys who were in a clump on the floor.

"P-Please, awaken our Pharaohs! Something terrible has happened!"

"Eh, they're sleeping." Marik said idly, "Leave a message at the sound of the beep and they'll get back to you."

"Beeeep…" Malik added in monotone.

The guard looked at them strangely but then nodded, "Um, my Pharaohs… I-It's me, Henry, sorry to call when you're asleep, but I just thought you should know, the Shadow monsters you let loose… T-They've broken down the east entry door and are now in the Palace! Um, call me back at 673-7162. B-Bye."

They all looked at each other for a moment before it sunk in.

"… WHAT?"