DUDE, WHERE'S MY ALIEN

CHAPTER 6

Kyle kicked a candy wrapper on the metal grate by the cargo hold doors. He turned to Janet, shaking his head. "Another day, another dollar."

Janet laughed, leaning back against the wall. "Yeah, but change dollar to quarter."

The garage doors to the cargo hold split open, receding into the metal walls. The general walked out to greet them. "Attention!" The small unit of men saluted, after regrouping by the cargo hold. "Alright, now that the bullshit's through, let me see assholes and elbows! Get this shit loaded! We got a bird to catch!"

The general chucked his cigar into a nearby puddle, and pulled Kyle aside. "Larson, I want you to personally keep an eye on these containers. I trust you more than a whole platoon of men." He looked at the cargo hold. "These things are nasty, and if one gets loose…" The general handed him a portable nuke. "Let's just hope it doesn't come to that. Kyle gulped, grasping the full force of the statement. He nodded, sliding the nuke into his pack. "Yes sir." He choked, and headed into the cargo bay.

Kyle went to the back, to make sure everything was in order. The marines had loaded all of the crates into the APC. Kyle grabbed one of the scientists by the shoulder, dragging him into the APC. "Ok now, tell me what, exactly, are we transporting again."

The scientist fixed his glasses, replying, "Xenomorph eggs."

"That's eggs only right?" Kyle questioned, narrowing his gaze.

"Correct corporal." The scientist remarked.

Kyle walked around the glass containers, eyeing them cautiously. Without warning he slammed the butt of his rifle against the glass. It bounced away casually.

The scientist looked at him in disbelief. "What are you doing!"

Kyle smirked, replying, "Making sure that these things are sturdy. I don't want any surprises." Kyle rubbed the glass of the case. "Acid proof?" Kyle asked as he looked back at the scientist.

"Well…" the scientist began. "They are acid resistant."

Kyle looked up sharply. "Ok this mission is over."

Kyle leapt out of the APC, heading for the drop ship. "General!" Kyle called out. The scientist ran after him, babbling about the importance of moving the eggs. "General!" he called again.

The general descended from the ramp of the drop ship. "Yes Corporal?" he called back.

"General these containers are not aid proof!" Kyle exclaimed.
The scientist caught up with him, panting. The general turned to the scientist, asking in a low tone. "Is this true?"

The scientist pushed his glasses up on his nose once more, replying, "No they are not. They are acid resistant. But it should…"

The general held his hand up, cutting him off. He grabbed his com link, speaking into it. "This is General Miller. This mission is a no go."

A voice broke over the static. "This is private first class Jennings. Sir, please repeat"

The general frowned, and barked back, "I said this mission is aborted!"

A different voice came back. "General this is Doctor Conners, PHD. I am head of the Trinity Corporation's division here on Silver Star Station. That is a negative, you are go for operations.

The general spit on the ground, shouting back into the com. "Damn you fools, these containers are not acid proof! I'm callin' this god damn mission off."

Connors replied. "Sir you are overstepping your authority. I have deemed the cargo safe for transit. Failure to comply will result in a Court Marshal.

The general slammed his com onto the grate, grinding it with his heel. Kyle, go check out that cargo, I'll be sending all available units to help you watch over it. If those eggs so much as twitch, I want to destroy the whole fucking thing!"

The general stomped up the ramp, shouting out orders to the unit. Kyle turned and headed back to the cargo hold. He grabbed the scientist by the shoulder, dragging him along.

"Where are you taking me?" the scientist spit out, almost tripping over his own feet.

"Well you get a front row seat if these things get loose." Kyle replied, cracking a smile. They came around the corner of the APC, and Kyle stopped abruptly, yanking the scientist to a halt. "Do you smell that?" he asked, eyeing the scientist. "That's the same smell that was on level 12."

The scientist tried to walk away, but Kyle slammed him against the APC, and shoved his forearm across his neck. "You move and I'll put so many holes in you that you'll have to be IDed by your dentist." Kyle hissed into the scientist ears.

Kyle walked over to the APC door, holding his nose. Carefully peering in, all he could see was smoke. He grabbed the scientist, practically throwing him inside. "Check the containers!" He yelled. Kyle followed the scientist in.

His eyes widened with horror as he looked inside the glass. All fourteen eggs were open. Two dead face huggers had impaled themselves with the prongs holding the eggs. There was no site of the other twelve. Kyle jumped out of the APC, and ran toward the drop ship. His heart raced.

As he scaled the ramp to the drop ship, he saw one of the face huggers. Quickly he raised his pulse rifle, spraying it with lead. The face hugger curled up. Squirting blood onto the ramp. "Shit! SHIIIIT!" Kyle screamed aloud. He kicked the wall hard, and turned to watch the acid eat through the hull of the drop ship. "Great, just fucking wonderful."

Kyle opened the door to the inner area of the drop ship. "General!" He called out. Kyle ran forward to the cockpit. He opened the door, grabbing the General by the arm. "They're loose!"

The general dropped his coffee, turning to Kyle. "What!"

"Sir, they got loose. Two killed themselves, and the acid ate through the container. I nailed one on the ramp…"

The general turned to the pilot, "Stand by for evacuation!"

Kyle grabbed the general's wrist, shaking his head. "That's a big negatory sir. Like I said… I nailed one on the ramp."

The general sat down, and kicked a small storage compartment, denting it. "Shit!" He reached over, flipping on the com switch. "This is General Miller. The containers have been compromised. Over."

A female voice broke the static. "General, confirm. You say the xenomorph containers are breached?"

"That's a big A-fucking-firmative!" The general swiveled around in the chair, grabbing his pulse rifle.

The voice came back. "General, please hold for Doctor Conners."

There was a long silence, and then another voice came back. "Connor's here. You say the containers are breached?"

The general rubbed his forehead. "How many times do I gotta tell you? You want it in Chinese? The containers are history! Destroyed! Compromised! Call it what you want it. Point is, it's a military situation now. I'll handle it from here Jack ass!"

The voice came back quickly. "Now sir I strongly recommend you…"

The general switched the com off. He looked to Kyle, who nodded slightly. "Alright, if we move quickly, we can get out of here before those things do their business and breed off some really nasty offspring."

Kyle shifted uncomfortably. "Just what exactly are we dealing with here sir?"

The general lowered his head, speaking in a low tone. "Son, I have seen what these things can do. They come out of those eggs, and they attach themselves to some poor sucka'. Then they lay this… thing… inside their chest. There's no way to stop it. In about four hours or so, that thing bursts straight outta the chest. Then… it grows."

Kyle's jaw dropped. The general put his hat on, and added, "We don't want to be here when that happens. Coz when the shit hits the fan, they'll be all over us like a 18 year old horn dog in a sorority house."

The general stood up, and put a hand on Kyle's shoulder, remarking, "Let's go round up the cattle and request a transport!"