Author's Notes: This chapter has a mature version located on my personal website that is now only available as the DM Book I Full Version – Mature and not as a separate chapter anymore. Please visit my profile for the link if you are interested.

Chapter 2

Dearka's Declaration

Dearka felt different whenever he was around Miriallia. It was almost as if the world around him didn't exist and it was just the two of them. The kiss they were sharing deepened as he hesitated to draw her closer.

"What am I doing? She's not like any woman I've ever been with before," he thought trying to shake his uneasy feeling.

Miriallia felt his slight hesitation and stepped into the kiss. The passion that followed between them was inevitable. He felt her hands move up the front of his green t-shirt and under the shoulders of the white jacket.

"She's making a move on me. Should I stop her before it goes too far?" he thought still second-guessing himself.

He began to quiet the jumbled thoughts in his head. After all, this is what he had wanted since he met her. As their lips parted for the moment, he felt her removing the jacket she had slipped her hands under.

Dearka didn't fight her determination but also didn't want to hurt her. Before he left the bridge, he did tell Sai that he didn't intend to. But intentions and reality were two different things.

"Is doing something that we both want going to hurt her? I'm not going to be able to stay even if we…" he thought desperately hoping his mind would stop trying to be so rational.

He snapped out of his daze. He had been staring into her blue eyes as he debated the events that were taking place.

"Dearka, please stay. Even if it's just a little longer," she begged with her hands now working at his belt.

He looked at her and saw the need and longing in her eyes. These feelings were similar to his. He stepped back, still holding her hand as if leading her. She obediently followed, never taking her eyes off his. As they reached each other again, he pulled her towards him.

"Before anything else, I have to tell you how I truly feel," he said to her.

She watched him carefully as he moved in closer.

"It's something I've never felt before. Somehow in this whole mess, I must have fallen in love with you. But I still have to go back to the PLANTs," he stated matter-of-factly.

Miriallia's eyes shot open at his declaration. She didn't want any more hesitation from him.

"So, show me how much you love me then. I don't care if you are going back to the PLANTs. And I don't care how long it takes, just plan on coming back to me," was all she could say.

He pulled her in and began to kiss her deeply again moving his own hands to the buttons of her uniform. She felt his hands as they gracefully unbuttoned her uniform jacket before she was whipped around to his bed. She fell backwards cushioned by the mattress beneath. Next to her, her hand brushed the duffel bag Dearka had been trying to pack earlier. Still involved in a very passionate kiss, she pushed the duffel bag off the bed with a bit of rage at its' existence.

Dearka began to kiss her neck gently before whispering in her ear.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" he asked softly.

Her big blue eyes opened again as she felt his hot breath on her face. For one moment, Tolle flashed through her mind and she squeezed her eyes shut as if to block him out. When she opened them again that of Dearka's replaced Tolle's face.

"Is this what I want? It feels right, but am I moving too fast?" she thought reflecting on the moment.

Dearka waited for her response patiently. He couldn't rush her. Not at a moment like this, although he desperately wanted to. Miriallia dragged her nails gently up his back, her wrist loose. Dearka closed his eyes from the soothing feeling this provided him.

"Dearka please," she begged.

He needed no more persuading as he moved in for his prey. After it was over, he began to playfully kiss her neck as he rolled to her side never leaving her embrace. Miriallia closed her eyes and allowed Dearka to pull her in closer, resting her head partly on his shoulder and the pillow. Dearka didn't say anything but kept her in his arms before drifting off to sleep as well.

A few hours had passed since Miriallia had fallen asleep in Dearka's arms. He opened his eyes to see her still lying next to him peacefully.

"She's so beautiful," he thought smiling to himself.

He looked around the room and devised the best plan to maneuver around her without disturbing her peaceful slumber. Slowly he slipped away from her embrace and moved the covers over her, brushing his hand around her face and through her bangs.

He leaned over and kissed her softly, whispering, "I'll come back to you someday. I promise."

He quietly moved away picking up his clothes that were strewn about and changed into them. When he looked down at his watch he realized how late it had gotten. Yzak was certainly going to be irritated that he hadn't radioed him for the transport yet. He grabbed the duffel bag that Miriallia had pushed to the floor earlier in the night and glanced back at her once again.

"Beautiful," he thought again.

It was all that kept running through his mind. The door swished open; he took a deep breath as if to gain the courage to leave Miriallia behind and stepped outside. As the door swished again to a close behind him, he exhaled the breath. He continued his long trek down the corridors until he reached the hanger and walked over to Mr. Murdoch.

"Hey there kid. You ready to head out?" Murdoch asked catching a glimpse of Dearka.

Dearka looked over to the Buster and answered solemnly, "Yeah."

Murdoch saw the look on the kids' face.

"Ah, don't feel sad. We'll take good care of it," Murdoch said.

Dearka looked back at the mechanic.

"Oh, uh, thanks," he said realizing Mr. Murdoch didn't know the reason he really had the long face.

"I know you probably wanted to take it with you, but I guess there's no reason to now," Murdoch continued.

"That's not the only thing I wish I could take with me," Dearka thought sadly.

Dearka just looked around the hanger and watched all the mechanics scurrying around trying to get parts to the machines and the area cleaned out for a lockdown. The ship was getting set to return to Orb.

He sighed before speaking again, "Could you ask the Captain to radio the ZAFT shuttle for me?"

Murdoch looked back up from his clipboard and walked over to him.

"Sure kid," he said patting him on the back, "and thanks again for everything you did here."

Dearka gave a small smile as if to humor the man. He had been a part of the crew for six months and somehow he felt like it was his home now.

"Well I guess it hasn't been six months since I was a prisoner for a month and a half of it. But now what do I do? What is really waiting for me when I return to the PLANTs? I'm still a traitor in their eyes, and what about Yzak? He was so angry that day. I know I did the right thing, but I still can't get the thought of one of my closest friends pulling a gun on me just because I was protecting some Naturals out of my mind. I can only hope he sees that we were wrong now that this war is finally over," Dearka thought.

Murdoch had finished at the communicator with Captain Ramius and walked back over to Dearka.

"She said she would contact the ZAFT fleet to have the shuttle sent for you. Although, I must say, I wish you would consider sticking with us. What do you plan to do when you return to ZAFT?" he asked.

Dearka hesitated for a moment. He had just been thinking the same thing.

"I don't know what to do, but I do know I have to return," Dearka admitted.

Mr. Murdoch now sighed as well.

"Well good luck to you. I have a few things to finish up so try to stay out of trouble," he said grinning.

"Yeah," was all Dearka could muster.

"I think I'm really going to miss these people," he thought thinking fondly of the crew he had been working so closely with for the past few months.

His thoughts flashed back to Miriallia. The first time he saw her was when he walked by as a prisoner.

"I was such a jerk. She was hurt and all I could do was mock her for the tears that fell from her sad eyes," he thought scolding himself.

He shook his head again as more images raced by. The time he met her again while waiting for the doctor to return and what he said to her. He was tied to the bed and thought the doctor had entered the room and there she was. Those blue eyes were filled with a look of terror at the site of him.

"I tried to reassure her that I couldn't possibly hurt her all tied up. And what did I do then? I mocked her again and somehow guessed the exact reason why she was crying. I made her pain resurface. Then she went mental with that knife in her hand. I didn't think I was going to make it for a moment. In fact, I was sure of it when that other girl entered with the gun. For the first time, I was actually scared. And there she was, the same girl that had just tried to kill me herself, ended up saving me," he thought.

All the conversations they shared when he was locked up in the brig came back to his mind. She intrigued him and he would coax her back to talk to him a little more every time she visited. He had felt some deep emotion welling up inside of him, unable to determine its origin. Then it became clear when Orb was attacked.

"She let me go and she told me she was sorry for everything that happened with how things turned out. I couldn't get her off my mind after I left the ship. I couldn't just let her die. I even remember how frustrated I was that I ran toward Morgenroetein the first place to find the Buster. I was risking my life for some girl that I hardly knew," he thought still reflecting on previous events.

He closed his eyes again as he continued to replay the events that brought them together.

"I guess that's the trouble with love. You don't have any control over yourself. All the things she said after and the small words of encouragement and concern. They were all enough to make me want to be around her. But tonight when she told me she didn't want me to leave. It was the first time she had ever really made me feel like she wanted me to be there. And then we…so, why am I leaving?" he thought wondering what possessed him to walk off that ship.

Dearka was brought back in to reality when he heard the shuttle land in the hanger. Yzak was probably waiting for him on the other side of the door.

"I guess I can't change my mind now," he thought as he looked back at the hanger's exit and the door to the ZAFT shuttle opened.

"Goodbye Miriallia. I'll come back someday for you," he said softly as he grabbed his duffel bag and walked toward the ship.

Sure enough, Yzak was standing at the door waiting for his friend to climb the stairs.

"Well I guess it's over," he said as Dearka entered.

"Yeah, I guess it is," was all Dearka could say as he took a seat in the shuttle.

The shuttle began preparations for departure from the Archangel and Dearka could only stare out the windows into the hanger.

"So, what's your problem?" Yzak snipped.

Dearka just looked back at him.

"Fine, whatever, I don't really care anyway," Yzak spoke again before Dearka could even think of an answer that would satisfy his friend.

Dearka just shrugged it off and the shuttle departed for the ZAFT base where the remaining soldiers were gathering to await the peace treaty discussions and emergency High Council meeting.

Back in the residential quarters…

Miriallia slowly woke up from her long sleep. When she did, she noticed something didn't feel right. Her hand patted the bed before her eyes opened.

"What? Where is he?" she thought looking around in a panic.

Miriallia shot up from the bed. As the covers fell away from her body, she felt a slight breeze. She quickly dragged the covers back up and looked around the room.

"I forgot. We…" she thought shocked with herself.

She jumped out of the bed and grabbed her clothes. As she threw them on as fast as possible she noticed something on the floor.

"Dearka's watch," she stated as she picked it up off the floor.

She had no more time to waste. She ran out of the room and down the corridors to the hanger.

"No, he couldn't have left yet. He just couldn't have," she thought flustered.

Murdoch had watched Miriallia enter the hanger and called to her.

"You looking for the kid?" he asked.

"Huh?" Miriallia replied.

"The kid from ZAFT, were you looking for him?" he asked again.

"Yes, have you seen Dearka?" Miriallia asked the panic still in her voice.

"I thought he would have told you he was heading out," Mr. Murdoch shifted uncomfortably.

Miriallia's eyes dropped and a bout of sadness swept over her. It felt the same as when Tolle went missing. Tears began to run down her cheeks.

"Oh. Thank you Mr. Murdoch," she said as her eyes looked toward the floor.

"How could you not say goodbye to me?" she thought feeling hurt.

Miriallia left the hanger and walked toward the bridge. As she approached Sai exited.

"Mir?" he asked concerned.

"Hey Sai," was all she could manage to say.

"What's wrong?" he asked noticing the tear stains on her cheeks.

Miriallia looked up at him and showed a false smile.

"Nothing, it's just that Dearka left to go back to the PLANTs and I think I'm going to miss him a bit I guess," she said.

Sai just watched her for a moment before speaking again.

"Well, I guess we all need to go back to where we belong now that the war is over. What do you think you are going to do?" he asked her.

"Me? I haven't really thought about it yet," she answered.

"Well, when you do, promise me you'll keep in touch. Okay?" Sai coaxed.

"Of course I will Sai. I don't want to lose contact with any of my friends. We've all lost so much already. I couldn't bear to lose the rest of you too," she stated with a small smile forming on her face.

She had forgotten for a moment about her sadness of Dearka's departure. She could go home and see her parents again. She could even be a normal teenager living in a peaceful nation. Well, once they rebuild it that is.

"I'm heading on to the bridge to help with guiding the ship back to Orb. Were you just taking a break?" Miriallia asked again before falling into a dazed silence.

Sai looked up at her. She had been so silent making Sai feel a little uncomfortable and he was unsure of whether to disturb her thoughts.

"Uh, yeah, I just wanted to get some water first," Sai answered.

"Well I guess I will see you on the bridge then," she said.

Sai began to walk away when Miriallia turned back to him again.

"Sai?" Miriallia asked.

"Yeah?" he answered.

"I think I'm going to help with the rebuilding of Orb and then I'll see what to do from there," she answered.

He smiled and nodded.

"I guess our job isn't quite done yet then, is it?" he asked already knowing her response.

She smiled back at him too before turning to enter the bridge.

A few months later…

Dearka walked behind his friend Yzak who was now in a Council uniform. They were on their way to a meeting on the current situation between the two nations of Naturals and Coordinators. As he entered the room for the negotiations, he looked around. Shiho was also accompanying both he and Yzak to this function.

"Well, I guess it makes sense she would join us. She was one of the top pilots in Yzak's squad after I was captured," Dearka thought partly jealous.

Shiho looked back at Dearka with a flash of danger in her violet eyes. Dearka quickly looked away. He was kind of jealous. Yzak may not have realized it yet, but he was a lucky man to have someone by his side as dedicated to him as Shiho was. His thoughts wandered to Miriallia.

"I wonder what she is doing right now," he thought allowing his mind to wander.

Back in Orb…

Miriallia was sitting in her bedroom with her pajamas on at that moment with her knees drawn to her chest. She had a picture of her and Tolle sitting on the table in front of her bed. Her back was pushed against the bed with tears falling from her bright blue eyes once again. The picture had been taken right before the war dragged them in to it with the destruction of Heliopolis. Her eyes looked out the window to the sky as a shooting star flew past.

"Dearka," Miriallia thought sadly.