Disclaimers:I don't own any of the characters, they totally belong to JK Rowling. She's a fantastic author, and I respect her so much, I would never steal anything or claim anything.

Authors Note: Please, don't hate me. I know I've been horrible, I haven't updated in what? two month, and when I finally promise I'll update, three weeks have to pass before I do. I'm sorry. My computer has been very ill. We've had like, 100 viruses and it was totally screwed and made weird, alarming noises. And besides that,my CD on which I had my Drunk filebrokedown so everything I had written was gone.That was actually the whole chapter, so I had to write it again. I have never in my life sweared that much.

So that's why I didn't update, as I promised you, Princesspepper.
With my computer gone, I spent my last few weeks making my homework every day and writing on this chapter and chapter 12. So, this chapter is pretty long. I hope you'll like it! And as always, please review, It's so nice to get a little message from you! Thank you to all of you, Poison Candy Sprinkles, DanishGirl, Pure Black, Ahja Reyn, Ivin Artemis Draconis, doxie, addmoose2004and Aaia! And ifI forgot anyone, sorry I'm very tired right now!

This chapter is dedicated to Princesspepper- thank you for giving me that mental kick in my butt, I needed it!

And as always, Jess who's my mentor and thank you Cecilie, you're my inspiration!

And to my friend Cecilie who's in hospital right now, get better!

Enjoy!

Drunk

Chapter 11

The Power to Destroy

Two weeks.

Two weeks had passed, since that morning in the Astronomy Tower, and Harry hadn't even spoken to Draco once.

Draco Malfoy was back to normal, snearing at Harry in classes, making fun of Ron and calling Hermione a mudblood. Yesterday, he even tried to knock over Ron in Potions with Crabbe and Goyle cheering at the sideline. Draco was a bastard, the world was in perfect shape - everything seemed to be back to normal.

Except, that it wasn't.

Rumors spread fast, and it was now official that Harry was dating Ginny. It was as if every single Gryffindor only had been waiting for that to happen. Ron was practically glowing with pride, when he hugged them both, telling them how long he had been waiting for Harry to make a move on his sister.

Mrs. Weasley had sent him a letter which sounded like she was already planning their wedding and both Seamus and Dean had pat him on the shoulder and said: "Congratulations, Mate

that was about time!"

Neville though, had been slightly more reticently when it came to celebrate the new famous couple. Harry actually had him suspected for being a little more happy about Ginny than what met the eye. He felt bad about that, he had to talk to Neville later.

Hermione had also been happy about the news. She hugged Harry tightly, congratulating him, but when she pulled back, Harry noticed that her smile didn't quite reach her eyes. But he didn't really give it another thought.

He should just be happy

He should be happy, that he was dating a very sweet Gryffindor-girl who was also his best friend's sister. It was perfect. They were perfect, a perfect match. He should be happy...

But he wasn't.

Everytime he entered The Great Hall or a classroom, his eyes instantly settled on a small, pale face covered with white-silvery hair. Everytime he went to bed, images of naked, white skin and grey, cold eyes washed through his brain, teasing him and making him sweat with both lust and guilt.

And he did feel a lot of guilt.

He felt guilty, because he couldn't let it go. He couldn't let him go.

He stared at him hungrily, obsessivly even when he was with Ginny. When he kissed her, he closed his eyes, picturing someone else in her place. Someone else.

And he hated himself for doing so.

He hated himself for being so weak. For being so much in... he couldn't even think the word. He wasn't allowed sothink such thoughts when he was with Ginny. He should be happy.

But he wasn't.

And here he was, still eyeing Draco from the other side of the room. And that was wherehe shoud stay.

On the other side of the room.

Draco took a sip of his orange juice. The noice from the Gryffindor table was starting to give him a headache. He growled.

"Bloody Gryffindors," he spat, taking another sip.

Blaise, who was sitting next to him, grinned. "Yeah, they're awfully anoying. One would think they were all six years oldor something. They really shouldn't be allowed to use wands".

Somwhere to his right, Crabbe and Goyle started making weird, snorting sounds which Draco knew, meant they where laughing. Draco smiled.

Blaise continued.

"I mean, they have no class! Take Potter, for an example."

Draco's head snapped up from the table. He looked in Blaise's direction. Potter was sitting at the center of the table, Ginny Weasley on his lap.He scowled.

"Oh yeah, Potter's dating that Weasel-girl, isn't he?".

A weird feeling of rage which he didn't understand, was forming inside him. He watched how the Weasley-girl was nussling Potter's hair with one hand, the other resting on his knee.

How could Potter stand having that girl clinging to him all the time? He had noticed Ginny Weasley's sickening adoration towards Potter through the years, now she had him and she was making a total fool out of herself, always following Potter in and out of classes, desperately holding his hand through supper and petting his hair every now and then.

Hell, he wouldn't even be surprized if he one day saw her peeing on Potter, marking him like a dog marks its territory. If she had been his girlfriend, he would have smacked her face for acting like that. But of course, a Weasley was way beneath his standard. He suddenly realised he'd been thinking about Harry Potter's love life, and shook his head violently.

Blaise gave him a funny look.

"What are you doing?"

"Oh, nothing just a headache..."

Stop thinking about Potter, for Christ's sake!

Blaise looked at him worridly, and Draco smiled. "Seriously, it's nothing, I'm all right!".

"I don't know, Draco," Blaise said. "Not long ago, you were acting very strange and now you're suddenly back to your own self, it's just a bit strange." He shrugged. "You know, you haven't spoken to Pansy for about two weeks."

"God, it's not my fault the woman suddenly decides to avoid me, is it?" Draco cried, making a gesture towards the other end of the table where Pansy was sitting, chatting to Micillent Bulstrode.

"That's what's worrying me, Draco," Blaise said soothingly, apparently trying to make him lower his voice.

"She's what? your best friend, we've all noticed the distance between you and her... did you have a fight or something?"

Draco sighed and leaned back. "I actually don't really know what's wrong, Blaise. I don't recall myself offending her in any way – except for when I found her snogging Colin Creevy, but that was month ago!"

He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "It's like there's a part of me that's gone, I can't even remember what happened like, three weeks ago, I must be really stressed out our something!".

Blaise grasped his shoulder and sqeezed it gently. "Just... try to relax, Draco. Exams are coming uo soon, don't let yourself get too worked up about it, okay?"

Draco smiled.

"I'll try..."

"By the way..." Blaise was suddenly looking at him in a way that almost made him nerveous.

"What where you doing with Potter at the Ravenclaw party?"

Draco choked on his orange juice. Blaise patiently hit his back, while Draco coughed violently.

"What the hell are you talking about", he finally croaked, his eyes full of tears.

"I saw you talking to him at the party, and a few people saw the two of you leaving the Great Hall not long after."

Draco just stared at him. "Ravenclaw was throwing a party? When?"

Blaise frowned. "You... Draco you were there! You can't possible have forgotten about it!"

Draco felt horrible.His headache was steadily growing stronger, and his lips felt dry and cold.

"Blaise, if this is a joke, I don't like it very much."

He hated that his voice revealed his feeling of uneasiness. Blaise held his palm against his foreheard.

"Are you feeling ill? You look pale, maybe you should go lie down."

Draco unsteadily got to his feet, and swayed a bit. "I'm just... It's the head, It's probably nothing."

Before he left the table, he could have swear he heard Blaise mutter "...the second time he does that..." under his breath.

As he passed the Gryffindor Table, he turned his head and – almost as if they had read each others mind – met Potter's eyes.

Suddenly, something made him stop walking.

Potter...

two weeks ago...

the Astronomy Tower...

andthey had... he had been...

Sweet mother of Merlin, Potter KISSED me!

He felt the blood leave his face.

Oh God. This was disgusting!

The memory was suddenly there, clear and fresh in his mind. How on earth could he have forgotten about this? What was wrong with him? Did this mean that there had actually been a party in which he had – and hopefully just – been talking to Potter? And about what?

All those questions floated through his head, as he finally came to his sentence, and almost ran out of the hall.

He ended up in the bathroom, splashing water in his now flushed face. He avoided his own reflextion, afraid of what he might look like.

He was in shock. Something had happened two weeks ago, and he didn't understand it. Potter must have hexed him. He was a sick, sick pervert who belonged in Azkaban, and Draco would make sure he would suffer.

But what about the party? What had they been talking about, and had he really left the party with Potter later that night?

Draco finally looked into the mirror. His eyes told him the same thing as his heart. There was only one way to solve this:

He had to talk to Potter.

When Harry's eyes met Draco's, he'd been shocked to find the Slytherin looking at him in what looked like horror but also... realization.

He stared into those silver-grey orbs, trying to read all the emotions flewing around there.

Was it possible that Draco might... that heremembered something?

He felt his heart skip a beat. Stop it, Harry, you can't get your hopes up for something that might never happen!

Suddenly, Draco blinked, gasped and then ran out of the hall.

Harrylooked afterhim. Then hestood up. Ginny fell to the floor with a small cry. "Harry, what,-"

He ignored Hermione's yell, he knew what he had to do.

I have to find Draco!

He hurried through the Slytherin dungeons and finally found himself standing in front of the portrait of the snake. He knocked three times before he finally heard someone coming.

The door swung open, and Draco stared at him with a stunned expression.

"Potter..."

"Dra- Er, Malfoy – I need to talk to you!"

Draco gave him a cold look. "What a coincident... well, you better come in, then".

Harry wanted to know what Draco had meant by "coincident", but instead hurried inside, afraid Draco might change his mind and close the door in his face.

He looked around. The Slytherin Common room was actually very nice. Dark, but with loads of green and silver torches which lit up the room and reavealed soft, green chairs and couches which where lined around the fire place.

Draco broke the silence. "So, Potter? Start talking, I have homework to do".

Harry wanted to open his mouth, but found himself speechless.

"Er..."

Draco rolled his eyes.

"Well, since you seem to suffer from the well-known Gryffindor-syndrome called stupiness, I better start then! So. Why did you kiss me?"

If possible, Harry felt even dumber than before.

"Er, excuse me?"

Draco crossed his arms and stepped closer. "I asked, " he said, putting a stress on every word, "Why. Did. You. Kiss. Me?"

He lifted a brow, looking at Harry impatiently.

Harry felt the blood burn in his face, and saw Draco smirking at him. He took a deep breath.

"I didn't".

The smug expression on Draco's face dissapeared. "What?"

"I didn't kiss you."

Draco now looked almost angry.

"You're lying, I remember it all clearly," he spat.

Oh yes, he remembered. He remembered being pressed against naked skin, strong arms holding him still, hot lips sucking on his tongue... he remembered... heat.

"I didn't kiss you", Harry said

"-You kissed me."

Draco took a step back. He shook his head.

"No way!"

"Listen, Malfoy", Harry said impatiently.

"You may remember the Er, kiss... but what else do you remember? Something else happened before that, you know."

"I, uhm..."

Draco closed his eyes and tried to think back, but everything before the incident in the tower was gone. The realization made him gasp.

Harry looked at him with sad eyes. "I know it must be difficult for you..."

"Well, excuse me, but that's somehow very hard to believe, Potter," Draco spat.

He hated to admit it, but he was scared. The whole situation was so unbeliviable wrong. Potter knew something about him – something which had somehow been ereased from his momory. And not knowing what that something was, terrified him.

"I'd wish there was something I could do," Harry said, almost pleading.

Draco gave him a nasty glare. "Well, you could start by telling me how the hell I – apparetly – ended up – he closed eyes and shuddered - kissing you".

He saw Potter flinch and smirked.

"It's... hard to explain. We, you and I... we had something. But it's over."

Draco was startled. He searched Potter's eyes. He has to be joking!

Those green eyes were filled with so many confusing emotions, Draco had to look away.Potter's emotions were too easy to read.

"You're telling the truth, aren't you?" It was more like a statement.

Harry nodded slowly. "I know it's hard to believe".

Draco snorted. "'Got a point there, Potter. But you're still not telling me why we had something, I simply refuse to believe the kissing-thing was about true love or hormones. You're not really my type AND you're a boy. So, care to explain yourself?

Harry who had been listening to Draco's insults, exploded from furiosity.

"NO, Malfoy! I don't want to explain anything to you! You know, this isn't some kind of joke, you may not remember anything, but I do! I remember everything and it was... it was...-"

He stopped. This is too painful.

"I just... can't." He let his arms fell to his sides.

"You're not even trying, Potter," Draco sneared.

"I don't want to."

"You're this close to making me very, very angry, Golden Boy"

"For christ's sake, Malfoy I can't do this!", Harry cried. "I can't tell you all this when you don't even remember... well,fuck it, you don't even remember Voldemort!"

The room went silent. Harry covered his mouth with his hands.

Shit!

Draco finally found his voice.

"Wh-what did you say?" Draco's voice was dangorously low.

"Fuck... Draco, it's nothing!" Harry backed against the wall and laughed nerveously. "Forget what I said, okay? It's just stupid."

Draco stepped close to him, his breath warm on Harry's face. He grabbed the front of his ropes.

"What happened with Voldemort?" Harry's eyes met Draco's. They looked... scared.

He looked back into them, confused by what he had just seen.

"Please, Draco, you don't want to know!" Harry felt his eyes watering, and wanted to kick himself for being such a girl. He turned away his face.

"What is it that you know about him? Tell me!" Draco's voice now sounded almost desperat.

Through the tears, Harry once again saw Draco in the Astronomy Tower. He saw his eyes, grey and empty. He saw his face, white as a ghost's. He could still remember his pleading voice, so full of hurt: "Help me, Harry".

He couldn't tell Draco. It wound destroy him.

Draco saw the look on Harry's face and winched. He didn't like what he saw, the expression the dark haired boy was wearing, looked so painful, Draco almost softened. This wasn't good.

Whatever Potter knew, it wasn't good. Maybe he really didn't want to know...

...but he had to.

"Tell me!"

"No."

"Bloody hell, Potter, I have the rights to know!"

Harry closed his eyes. He took a deep breath.

"He... did something to you, Draco."

Draco losened his grip. His breathing was becoming faster.

"I was the one who found you, you told me what happened... you looked horrible, he..."

Harry opened his eyes and stared into Draco's.

"He raped you."

Draco paled. "No.." he breathed

"I'm so sorry!" His voice was shaking. "You're lying!."

"I wish I was..." Harry whispered.

Draco slid to the floor. His eyes were wide open, but they didn't seem tofocuse on anything.

"You have to go now, Potter"

Harry wanted to cry.

"Draco, I'm so sorry...I,-"

"Please, go!"

It was the second time Harry had heard Draco Malfoy plead for anything. Only this time, he didn't plead for Harry.

Quietly, he left the room.

Harry walked fast through the corridors, after hearing the door slam behind him. When he reached the stairs to the Gryffindor Tower, he started running, and didn't stop until he was standing inside the Gryffindor common room. He stood there for several minutes, trying to catch his breath. Then his knees suddenly collapsed underneath him, and he fell to the floor, hiding his face in his hands.

He heard a sound from somewhere in the room. He looked up. Hermione.

"Harry? What's wrong?"

His system finally crashed.

She held him close and he sobbed into her shoulder. She didn't ask him any questions – not yet. She just held him.

She brushed his hair gently, feeling the soft locks of black hair between her fingers. For a while she just sat there, staring in to the flames. Then she finally opened her mouth.

"Now, tell me about Malfoy."

He was lying in bed. The room was dark, outside, the moon was hidden behind dark, stormy clouds which colour perfectly matched his soul. He felt... grey. Grey, and hollow.

He knew Potter had been speaken the truth.

He had seen the scratches on his body, two weeks ago. There were still a few of themleft. He hadn't understood. He hadn't understood from where he had gotten them. Or from whom.

Now he knew.

He knew from his dreams. Dreams about a tall, dark figure howering above him, sucking out his soul -but it wasn't a dementor.

It was something worse.

He wanted to scream. Wanted to die. The shame and the disgust filled him up, threatening to eat him up from the inside.

He remembered now. He remembered that night. He remembered his father's screams as he was being tortured by him. He remembered other screams, his own, and he wanted to throw up.

He remembered all these horrible things, but he still didn't remember Potter. Potter had known. He knew about that night. What had happened afterwards that made him forget?

Did Potter made him forget?

And could he do it again?

TBQ