Disclaimer: See Chapter One
Everybody's Changing
After reading Everybody's Changing again (which was my first attempt at slash fiction) I realised that the piece was a little disjointed, that there was so much more between Lupin and Snape that could have been explored…call it a missing scene…doing a Peter Jackson…or just a great excuse to write more about my favourite characters…I just hope someone enjoys my revisiting of the story…which will be continued when the inspiration decides to strike…until then I off to play Chamber of Secrets!
Missing Scene One - Apology Accepted
Lupin scanned the faces at the Slytherin table yet he couldn't see Snape and so concluded that he must still be in the infirmary. Lupin picked idly at his food, he didn't have much of an appetite and even though his friends didn't seem bothered by what had happened to Snape, he had been troubled all afternoon.
Lupin had tried to concentrate in Herbology, but his thoughts kept drifting back to the way Snape had looked when James had rescued him from the chilly depths of the lake. Snape had just seemed so utterly wretched and more humiliated than ever before. Professor Sprout's lesson only served to prick Lupin's conscience all the more as she gave a lecture on the healing properties of aqua flora, it seemed that Raglin weed was particularly effective in the symptomatic treatment of bruises.
Lupin shuddered despite the warm, earthy atmosphere of greenhouse two as he thought about those ugly dark patches on Snape's back that had been revealed by the clingy, wet transparency of his shirt. The abuse must have been recent, during the summer break. Lupin stifled a smile suddenly feeling even more guilty as he fondly recalled his holiday, two blissful, life changing weeks in the South of France, where he had never felt so happy and loved.
Lupin had left the lesson not joining in with his classmates jovial banter as they walked up to the castle. His stomach had tightened into a knot of sicken shame and the last thing that he was looking forward to was the evening meal. Lupin knew that he hadn't been directly involved with Black's prank on Snape but he still felt responsible, weighed with the guilt that he had been too cowardly to help or speak out against his friend, too afraid to defend someone with no friends in the fear that he might lose his own.
After the meal everyone made their way out of the Great Hall and towards their respected house common rooms. In the entrance hall Lupin stopped hesitating at the bottom of the main staircase and glanced down a torch lit corridor that lead towards the infirmary.
"What's up Moony?" growled Sirius impatiently as he fumbled in his jeans pockets for his cigarettes. "Some of us want to get back to the dorm….I'm dying for a fag."
"You go on then," said Lupin suddenly. "I'll catch up with you guys later."
"Where you off to then Moony…got a hot date?" Black laughed rising a shaggy dark eyebrow in surprise. "About time…who's the lucky girl…eh?" Black gave Lupin a nudge in the ribs.
"Oh," said James sounding a little disappointed. "But I thought you were going to help me with my Divination homework? But if you've got other plans…" Potter flashed Lupin a smile. "I am sure I can struggle on…"
"Divination sucks," retorted Black which got a squeal of laughter from Pettigrew. "But I can help you with the homework mate…I predict you're going to get another T grade!" Black burst out laughing as he did a cruel impression of the cross eyed Professor Blunt. "Besides I thought that Dumbledore was thinking about dropping Divination from the curriculum next year…it's all a load of crap if you ask me…unless Blunt's crystal ball will reveal who Moony's sneaking off to meet…there's an empty storage cupboard next to the Charms classroom that nice and private if you're after a quick grope…"
"I'm not sneaking off with anyone," returned Lupin sharply. "If you really must know, I am going to the infirmary to get my robe back. I lent it to Snape when James rescued him from the lake, we've got Professor Quinn first thing tomorrow and you know how strict he is about dress code…"
"Surely you don't want I your robe back after that greasy little freak has been near it?" snorted Black. "You're better off burning the thing just to be safe."
"Oh, grow up Sirius," snapped Lupin not caring if his friend seemed a little taken aback by his uncharacteristic short temper. Although Lupin loved Black dearly as a friend, and he was eternally grateful for the great understanding and loyalty all his friends had shown him on discovering the true nature of his condition, that didn't mean that he had to approve or condone Black's bulling Snape.
"Chill out Moony…it was only meant to be a joke."
"Just like pushing Snape into the lake…" Lupin snarled. "Didn't see him laughing…"
"What about my essay?" pleaded Potter, suddenly sensing the unusual tension developing between his two best friends.
"I could give your essay a look over if you like?"
James spun around to see Lily standing behind him, she smiled shyly. "I've finished mine, so I am at a bit of a loose end as Violet and Debbie are too engrossed in listening to some Dark Metal band…"
"Who?" squeaked Peter. "Not The Twisted Spectres."
"They're not Dark Metal…" laughed Black giving Pettigrew a thump on the arm. "And they're bloody crap band anyway."
"But Nightquest aren't bad," said Lily sounding a little unsure, a slight blush colouring her cheeks .
"Merlin…" snorted Black. "You girls actually dig that sort of stuff?"
"I don't know…" grinned James. "Their music is pretty cool…Remus lent me their first two albums."
"Really? Didn't know you were into that sort of stuff…" said Black sounding less defensive although he didn't seem to have the nerve to look directly at Lupin. "But their leader singer…all that make up and nail vanish…what's he? Some kinda queer boy…"
"Oh, Violet and Debbie think he's really cute," confessed Lily. "He's not really mine type through," she added quickly.
"Sorry guys," interrupted Lupin making sure that he didn't look in Black's direction. "Much as I would like to stand around discussing Nightquest I really need to get my robe back…"
"Yeah, well I'll see you later then…Maybe I could borrow those CDs off you, see what all the fuss is about," said Black with a shrug.
"Maybe…" replied Lupin as Black disappear up the staircase with Pettigrew trailing behind him.
"I'll save you a chair by the fire, then?" asked James. But Lupin didn't reply, he was suddenly puzzled by the worried expression that had just flashed across Lily's face unnoticed by James as he turned his back on her and started to climb the stairs .
"Are you alright Remus?" Lily asked in a nervous whisper glancing up the stairs.
"Come on, Lil," cackled James staring cross eyes down at her from the top of the staircase. He started to beckon to her over the wooden banister in his best impression of Professor Blunt, Lupin could hear Black and Pettigrew chuckling to themselves from somewhere above him in the darkness. "Divination awaits you…come…come"
"Alright James…" Lily called. "I'm here for you if you ever need to talk…okay?"
"Er…okay," replied Lupin a little confused, he stood for a while watching Lily hurry up the stairs to join James and the others, then turned away and slowly headed to the infirmary.
As Lupin walked down the torch lit corridor he wondered what Lily had meant by being there for him if he ever need to talk. Lupin had to admit that since last year when he and Lily had been the only ones in their house to take History of Magic they had become really close friends. Lupin could understand why James was so smitten, Lily was a beautiful, intelligent but also insightful young woman and an extremely talented witch. Lupin held a great brotherly affection and respect for her and Lily seemed genuinely fond of him, enjoying in his company and often confiding in him things that she didn't feel able to share with her female friends, her true feeling for James Potter for one. Lupin was really pleased that Lily and James finally seemed to be getting together, he guess it wouldn't be long until they were officially a couple and he had been more than happy to play cupid. Maybe Lily just longed to return the favour, not wanting to see him alone and unloved. Lupin sighed heavily as he reached the infirmary door. He had found it easier to talk to Lily than his friends especially regarding his feelings but there were some things that he just couldn't reveal to anyone. Lupin felt his stomach knotting up with a strange nervous excitement. All through dinner he had been thinking about how to word his apology to Snape, but as he pushed open the infirmary door all his good intentions and resolve suddenly seemed to fail him.
"Now come along Severus, lets get that shirt off. I won't have you sleeping in wet clothes, you've already caught a chill…" scolded Madam Pomfrey impatiently, she sounded drained and unusually irritated. "There's no need to be embarrassed with me, you haven't got anything that I haven't seen before…" Madam Pomfrey continued as she struggled to unbutton Snape's shirt. Lupin stood staring as the shirt was striped off to reveal Snape's slender, naked frame, his flesh was smooth, pale and disfigured with a cruel, sickening patchwork of bruising.
"Oh," cried Madam Pomfrey suddenly dropping the nightshirt into the bed in shock, Snape quickly snatched it up as she respectfully averted her gaze.
"What you staring at Lupin?" hissed Snape as he hurriedly pulled the nightshirt over his head.
"Oh, Remus…"said Madam Pomfrey gaining her composure as she advance upon him and firmly ushered him away from Snape's bed, Snape gave him a venomous looked before pulling the counterpane over his head. Lupin thought he heard a little desperate sob from beneath the covers.
"I…I…" uttered Lupin trying not to think about those terrible bruises, the yellowing and dark purple evidence of recurring abuse.
"What do you want Remus dear?" prompted Madam Pomfrey. "If you want to visit Severus then you'll have to come back in the morning."
"Oh," replied Lupin glancing over to the bed, Madam Pomfrey was obviously under the misconception that Lupin was Snape's friend. "Can I have my robe back? I lent it to Severus…when he fell into the lake." Lupin inwardly cursed himself at the betrayal to Snape, but he just couldn't get Black into trouble, he would be throw out of Hogwarts for sure.
"Of course my dear…have you only got the one?" asked Madam Pomfrey walking over to her desk and picking up a black bundle.
"Er…yes," replied Lupin sheepishly. "My parents didn't see much point buying me a new one when I've only got a year left."
"Well then, I suggest that you leave it on the end of your bed tonight and it will be freshly laundered for the morning."
"Thank you," said Lupin taking the robe, as he clutched it protectively to his chest, it felt a little damp and smelt faintly musky.
"And Remus dear," Lupin turned just as he reached the infirmary door. "I can rely upon your uttermost discretion regarding what you've just witnessed…" Madam Pomfrey warned as she glanced in the direction of the bed. Although her expression was stern, challenging Lupin couldn't help but see the helpless, pained look in her eyes and this time there was no mistake that Snape was quietly sobbing to himself, he sounded so unhappy, so alone with his private anguish.
"Of course, Madam Pomfrey," promised Lupin suddenly unable to bare the pitiful sobs, ashamed and angry that he and his friends had only added to Snape's personal misery over the years. "I won't tell a soul."
Lupin struggled to sleep that night, he had made his excuses to the others and gone to bed early. But as he lay under the covers, staring up at the scarlet drapes he just couldn't stop thinking about Snape. Lupin's conscience was deeply troubled, he thoughts haunted by the ghastly bruises and Snape's pitiful, lonely sobs. Lupin couldn't stop wondering by what terrible, sick reasoning Snape's father (Lupin was convinced that the abuse had be committed by Snape's father) had seen fit to beat his son. Lupin suddenly felt guilty and ashamed, he felt the tears streaming down his cheeks as he thought about his own home live, that his parents even after discovering that their son had been attacked by a werewolf never once treated him but with the utmost sympathy and love. Lupin felt angry and embarrassed of the way they had all behaved towards Snape. Maybe Lupin hadn't played an active part in the bulling and teasing but he was just as guilty, maybe more so as he was a prefect and should have known better , stopped the others. As Lupin heard the others enter the dormitory and climb into bed he made a silent promise to himself that he would go and apologise to Snape, he had hopes that now Lily was paying James the attention he craved that James would be less inclined to give Snape a hard time. And with a bit of luck this apparent change in James might even rub off on Sirius.
But even with his mind firmly set on apologising to Snape the next day Lupin still couldn't sleep. He lay in the darkness, the stillness of the night disturbed only by the ticking of Pettigrew's alarm clock and the sound of Black snoring. Lupin decided to get up and go down into the common room where he could sit in an armchair and read over his still unfinished Potions essay without waking the others. Lupin slipped out of bed, he shivered as his bare feet touched the wooden floor boards, so before grabbing his rucksack from under the bed he searched for his dressing gown. As Lupin groped in the gloom at the foot of his bed his fingers touched the familiar worn cotton of his robe. It felt warm and crisp, freshly laundered as Madam Pomfrey had promised so Lupin put it on and hugging his rucksack full of school books to his chest tiptoed down into the common room. It was a little chilly as the fire had gone since died in the hearth, and Lupin dared only light enough lamps for him to see his parchment . As he settled down in the armchair nearest the fireplace Lupin pulled his robe closer about him against the night air. The collar brushed his cheek, there was the faintest lingering warmth but the unfamiliar musk Lupin had smelt when he had pick up the robe from the infirmary had been replace by the smell of soap powder, Lupin felt unexpectedly disappointed.
Lupin unfurled his essay and endeavoured to read his large, florid handwriting in the flickering lamplight. After twenty minutes Lupin gave up with a defeated sigh, he couldn't see why his potion didn't work and he was just too tired and agitated to concentrate on the essay. Lupin let the parchment scroll tumble from his fingers as he let his head rest back against the soft padding of the armchair and within minutes he had fallen asleep.
Professor Quinn seemed in an especially odious mood, he strode about the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom reciting from The Dark Forces - A guide to self protection by Quentin Trimble and snapping at anyone that he didn't think was keeping up to speed with his dictation. Sirius seemed unfairly to get the worse of Professor Quinn's foul temper and Lupin wondered if he had guess what had happened yesterday. To Lupin's relief both James and Sirius had the good sense to keep their heads down and appear studious, but the double Defence Against the Dark Arts had never seemed so long. Lupin felt exhausted from his restless night, even the few hours that he had managed sleep in the common room armchair had left him with a stiff neck and aching limps, he was so glad that the rest of the day would be much easier.
After lunch year seven pupils had the afternoon free, it was just one of the several study periods set aside for them throughout the week to be used for the increasing amount of homework and projects required for the NEWTS exams. James and Lily had decided to head for the library to work upon a particularly difficult Ancient Ruins essay while Black and Pettigrew seemed content just to lounge around the common room. Lupin saw this as the perfect opportunity for him to go back to the infirmary, he would apologise to Snape and then join his more diligent friends in the library and read through his potions essay again.
Lupin pushed open the infirmary door and found Snape sitting in bed, propped up against his pillows, reading from a magazine. Lupin watched for a moment fascinated as Snape idly flickered through the pages, then stopped as something suddenly caught his attention. Snape cocked his head to one side, sending a strand of black hair tumbling into his eyes. Snape muttering under his breath as he tucked the unruly strand of hair behind his pale ear and studied the page intently. It looked to Lupin as Snape was just about to tear the page out of the magazine when he looked up and spotted Lupin staring at him. Snape instantly dropped the magazine, a slightly flush colouring his gaunt cheeks as with a startled expression he quickly rolled up the magazine and stuff in under the covers.
"What do you what?" Snape hissed glancing at the door to Madam Pomfrey's office, his dark eyes were rimmed with red and there were shadowy patches under them, the legacy of a restless night. "Come to have another gawp at my bruises…" Snape's long, pale fingers fumbled at the buttons of his nightshirt and Lupin couldn't help but notice that they were trembling. "Well be my guest," Snape spat.
"No…no…" pleaded Lupin waving his hands for Snape to stop undressing as he nervously glanced at the office door. "I just came to say that I am sorry for what happened yesterday…you didn't give me a chance to apologise and I…"
"Why should you want to apologise?" asked Snape, his dark eyes regarded Lupin with such an intensity that Lupin began to feel a little uncomfortable. It was obvious that Snape distrusted his motives and after everything that had happened over the years Lupin didn't blame him. Lowering his voice Snape added, "We all know who should be apologising…but don't worry I haven't squealed, I know how to keep my mouth shut."
"Severus about those bruis…"
"Back again?" said Madam Pomfrey as she strode into the ward carrying a glass bottle and a large spoon. "And there is no use making that face Severus. If you had taken off those wet clothes sooner then you wouldn't have caught that chill."
Lupin watched Snape purse his thin, pale lips into a taunt disgruntled line, shrinking back against the pillows trying to escape the large measure of sticky green liquid that Madam Pomfrey was pouring onto the spoon.
"Well don't just hover there Remus, take a seat," said Madam Pomfrey as she thrust the spoon at Snape. "Come along Severus, I haven't got all day."
"Er…well…I hadn't really intended to stay…" confessed Lupin, as he watched Snape reluctantly take the medicine, grimacing at the bitter taste.
"I was on my way to the library, I really need to get my potions essay finished."
"Oh," replied Madam Pomfrey. "It's just I thought that you could keep Severus company while I popped out to see the headmaster about something…I'm sure Severus won't mind giving you a little help, he has been complaining all morning of being bored…" she looked at the two boys expectantly until Snape reluctantly shrugged with a heavy sigh.
"Come on then Lupin, lets have a look at your essay."
"Er…okay…let me find it," said Lupin as he sat down in the chair beside Snape's bed and searched through his canvas rucksack. Snape gave a little snort as Lupin pulled out a crumpled parchment scroll and handed it to him. Once Madam Pomfrey was certain that the boys were settled she left the infirmary with a smile. She had been rather concerned and disappointed that Snape had received no visitors, she realised now that Lupin was just a classmate but the company would do Snape good. She couldn't betray Snape's trust, even Professor Dumbledore was helpless until the boy himself reported the abuse but Madam Pomfrey hoped that if the secretive, unhappy boy made just one good friend, then things could only start changing for the better.
"You don't have to help, if you don't want to," said Lupin as Snape slowly unfurled the crumpled parchment.
"It's that or try to make polite conversion," mutter Snape as he struggled to get himself comfortable against the pillows.
Lupin watched nervously as Snape's dark gaze darted across the parchment, his lips moving slowly as he silently read the large, florid handwriting. After a few minutes Snape shook his head and laid the parchment down onto his lap looking very serious.
"Well?" Lupin asked expectantly.
"Well…" Snape arched a slender dark eyebrow as his lips quivering into a smile, it was obviously he was enjoying prolonging Lupin's anxiety, but all that suddenly worried Lupin was the unexpected shuddered that went through him. He had never seen Snape smile before and for the briefest of moments that tired, gaunt face was almost beautiful.
"Your introduce is fine, pretty good actually…" continued Snape seemingly unaware of how his transitory show of emotion had effected Lupin. "You've obviously bothered to do a little wider reading on the subject rather than just rehash Professor Scarlett's notes, but you really haven't a clue about Double Brewing…"
"I…I don't?" Lupin asked trying to work out if Snape was mocking him or just pointing the fact out.
"No…but don't worry I expect most of our class hasn't a clue either, you've only made the common mistake of doubling the time when your potion has aconite in the ingredients…you're meant to cut the time in half whenever you use aconite…"
"Oh," replied Lupin feeling a blush rise to his cheeks, embarrassed by the foolish mistake. "I always forget that."
"Perhaps you should trying taking some of the Memory Draft once you've managed to brew it successfully? " sniped Snape.
"I guess," replied Lupin sounding a little disheartened.
"If I could make suggestion?" said Snape as he handed Lupin back the parchment.
"Er…yes."
"I would add the aconite and ground snake fangs to the dragon's blood at least twenty four hours prior to brewing the draft , that way the aconite infuses with the rest of the ingredients a lot quicker, you can cut the standing time by half, the draft will be ready to use in one day rather than three.
"Really?" replied Lupin warily, he wondered if Snape was trying to trick him. "It doesn't say anything about that in Advanced Potions Making."
"Yeah, well, Libatius Borage wrote that book years ago, doesn't anyone bother to experiment? So I doubt the rest of the class realises that if you add a clockwise stir after every seventh counter-clockwise stir when brewing the Draught of Living Death you get a perfect potion every time."
"Hang on," pleaded Lupin as he tipped his rucksack onto the bed. "I know I've got a quill here somewhere."
Snape quietly chuckled as Madam Pomfrey's neat, spotless blue blanket was suddenly covered with Fizzing Whizzbees, chocolate frog trading cards, nougat wrappers, rolls of parchment and several tatty looking feather quills.
"I didn't realise that you were so disorganised Lupin…and you a prefect too," Snape gently mocked as he helped himself to the last of Lupin's Fizzing Whizzbees.
"My name is Remus…and you're right I am awfully disorganised, always have been I'm afraid."
"Ahhh," mused Snape making a face, his dark eyes starting to water as the strong, bitter sweet fizzed away on his tongue. "And that's why you'll never achieve a masters degree at potion brewing…."
"We can't all be gifted with your nature talent" replied Lupin a little stunned. "Wow Severus…you're really considering doing a masters degree? Then again I shouldn't be surprised…I expect you've already been offered a place at collage…and then you could take a position at the Ministry of Magic or even teach potions here…"
"Why the hell would I want to come back here?" retorted Snape. "I'm counting the days until I graduate, then I can leave home and go to collage in London… but then I can't imagine it shall be any different to here…" sighed Snape dejectedly.
"What do you mean?" asked Lupin. "Don't you like being at Hogwarts?" Lupin knew that it was a really stupid, insensitive thing to say, but he just couldn't imagine anyone lucky to attend the school not to feel the same way he did about it.
"The lessons are the only things that make this wretched school slightly more tolerable than being at home," replied Snape crossing his arms almost protectively across his chest.
"But surely…" began Lupin.
"Oh don't be so naïve, I know what people around here think of me, everyone hates me. It's alright for you, Potter and Black…" Snape spat Lupin's friends names with such bitterness as if they left an unpleasant taste in his mouth. "I've more talent in my little finger than any student in this miserable school but if your face doesn't fit…if you're not attractive, popular, rich…if you dare to stray away from what is normal or expected of you…."
"I'm not attractive with this scar," interrupted Lupin tracing the scar that run across his face with his fingertips. Lupin suddenly felt a blush rise to his cheeks, he wondered why he had blurted out such a foolish and vain remark, he didn't understand why he should suddenly feel embarrassed that Snape thought he was attractive and popular.
"Yeah…sure you are…" replied Snape causing Lupin to blush all the more. "And that scar just gives you character, gives you a little mystery…don't the girls love that sort of thing?"
"Do they?" asked Lupin innocently.
"I don't care…I realised long ago that I was different. That no matter how much I excelled my classmates in intellect or talent I would always be someone to despise and torment…Black doesn't have the monopoly on bullying and humiliation…but I don't see why I should change just to be accepted by in-crowd idiots, most of whom couldn't brew the simplest of potions even if their miserable little lives depended upon it…"
Lupin just looked at Snape, he had never heard anyone talk with such rancour and hopelessness for the future. Lupin had no illusions that once he left Hogwarts life for someone suffering with his condition would be difficult and uncertain. Lupin could have justly resented Snape, arguing that his teenaged animosity towards the rest of the world was nothing compared to his monthly ordeal, but Lupin couldn't help but remember that he had the love and understanding of his family and friends to ease his suffering…whereas Snape seemed totally alone.
"Yeah, but maybe sometimes changing can be for the better." reflected Lupin suddenly thinking about James, but the sudden pain that flickered across Snape's face instantly caused him to regret his words. "It's not true you know…not everyone hates you, Severus…I certainly don't."
Snape looked at Lupin unable to hide his surprise, he seemed a little uncertain if Lupin had just made fun of him.
"What reason would I have to hate you?" Lupin added for good measure with a weak smile.
"You're not like Potter and Black," said Snape. "I don't see why you hang around with them…"
"They're my friends," replied Lupin trying not to sound too defensive. It was the first conversation Lupin had shared with Snape in the six years they had been attending Hogwarts together, it was fascinating to realise that there was more to Snape than nasty, snide comments.
"But you are so much better than them, you're different…" replied Snape picking up one of Lupin's wizard trading cards . He looked at it then carefully handed it to Lupin.
"What do you mean I'm different?" Lupin asked cautiously as he took the card and started to collect up the rest.
"I don't know…just different," Snape shrugged with a yawn.
Lupin carefully put the trading cards and rolls of parchment back into his rucksack, and then threw the sweet wrappers and tatty quills into a wastepaper basket next to Madam Pomfrey's desk. He returned to sit on the chair and not sure how to continue with the conversation sat awkwardly tapping his knee.
"You don't have to baby-sit me, you can go back to your friends," said Snape unable to hide at slight bitterness in his voice.
"I know," replied Lupin. "But I think I should wait until Madam Pomfrey gets back…you can finish looking at your magazine…I don't mind, Black's always looking at them."
Snape gave a unexpected little snort as he pulled the magazine from under the covers.
"What?" asked Lupin suddenly feeling foolish.
"You thought I was looking at a girlie magazine" chuckled Snape as he thrust the copy of Teen Witch under Lupin's nose. "I'm not into that sort of thing."
"Er…neither am I," confessed Lupin feeling a little uncomfortable, Black was constantly offering to lend him magazines from his large collection and reluctantly Lupin had borrowed one just to keep the peace. "But there's always one knocking about the dormitory," Lupin suddenly found himself adding.
"I only picked this up because I was bored and it was the only thing Madam Pomfrey had to read besides medical books….I don't know why girls read such rubbish…mind you after looking at the problem page what have I got to complain about…"
Lupin felt a nauseating pang of guilt, sickened by the memory of the ugly bruises Snape was trying to hide from everyone. Lupin just stared at Snape desperately trying to think of something to say.
"It was a joke," said Snape with a bitter chuckle, Lupin wasn't entirely convinced that Snape was joking but Snape gave him a smile, and again Lupin couldn't help think how that unfamiliar warmth softened his harsh, gaunt features. "I mean my problems seem pretty trivial compared to How do I tell if he fancies me? Or Should I let my boyfriend go all the way? And the ever perturbing What do I wear on that first date?"
"Ahhh," replied Lupin. "But don't you think…I mean sometimes it is good to talk to someone…."
"Yeah…well…I don't…okay," snapped Snape snatching up the magazine and stuffing it back under the covers.
"Okay," said Lupin unexplainably hurt by the rebuff. "I promised Madam Pomfrey I wouldn't tell anyone about your…bruises…and now I am promising you…"
"I am so sorry Remus…" apologised Madam Pomfrey as she hurried into the infirmary. "I hope you two boys have been alright."
"Never better," said Lupin slowly rising from his chair and picking up his rucksack. "Severus easily pointed out where I was going wrong with my homework…"
"Ahhh, well, it's Professor Scarlett fault that I took so long, he caught me on the way back from the headmaster's office concerned that Severus might miss his lesson tomorrow. I told him that wouldn't be a problem as long as you keep wrapped up warm and stay away from the lake."
"Yes, Madam Pomfrey," Snape promised sullenly.
"Well I suppose I better be going," shrugged Lupin as Madam Pomfrey headed for her office. "Thanks for helping me with the homework, only wished I had your natural talent for potions…"
"That's okay," replied Snape. "It was a change to have someone who isn't a complete asshole to talk to…"
"Er…thanks…I think…" Lupin smiled weakly hoping Snape had just made another joke. "See you in potions tomorrow then?"
"Yeah…and apology accepted."
Lupin returned to the Gryffindor common room feeling happier, his guilt conscience now relieved. And yet after his conversation with Snape, Lupin felt something else, something that he couldn't quite put his finger on. Lupin passed Pettigrew slumped in an armchair playing Exploding Snape with a first year and cheating. He climbed the steps to the dormitory only to find Black lying on his bed, his nakedness barely covered by a skimpy red bath towel. Lupin glanced at him for a moment suddenly feeling unsettled and wishing the his friend wouldn't lounge around in only his towel.
"Where have you been Moony?" Black asked peering over the top of his magazine. "Whoa!"
"Studying Potions," Lupin muttered as he put his rucksack down on his bed. "I mean that's what these free study periods are intended for. "
"Well you don't have to look so happy about it," snorted Black. Lupin hadn't been aware that he had been smiling. "Anyway…I have been studying…I've been giving the female form a damn good looking over ….take a look at the tits on her." Black grinned showing Lupin the centrefold of his girlie magazine. Lupin stared at the photograph , an attractive blond witch posed naked with a cauldron showing off her ample figure and perfect white smile.
"Er…very nice," Lupin said weakly.
"Very nice!" snorted Black. "Very nice, she's bloody gorgeous! I wouldn't mind giving her cauldron a quick stir…I take it blonds don't do anything for you."
"No," replied Lupin the unexpected image of Snape tucking a wayward strand of black hair behind his pale ear flashed into his head. "No…I am afraid she doesn't do anything for me mate."
"Ahhh, so you're a brunette man, eh?" chuckled Black. "Well you're out of luck mate this is a blonds special…but you know where I hide my old copies if you ever want a peek."
"Er…yeah…thanks," Lupin said quietly as he sat down onto his bed. Black didn't seem to have heard Lupin, his attention had already been drawn back to the magazine as he flicked over the page to leer at the next model. Lupin sighed as he thought of the postcard that lay hidden in his trunk under the bed. It had arrived the first week of term and although he knew it was only a fond farewell from his holiday, he suddenly wanted to touch it, know that everything that had happen in the South of France hadn't just been a blissful dream.
R&R!
Hope you enjoyed this extra bit!