AN- I do not own Lord of the Rings or any of the characters, except the ones I make up, of course.
Chapter One
Saruman the X-White Wizard sat in Hobbiton, contemplating his revenge. It was ten years after the War of the Ring, and yes, he was supposed to be dead. But that fool Gandalf resurrected him to be his lackey when the cursed halflings elected him as their ruler. Stupid morons.
Now he was forbidden by the Valar to control or kill anyone. Just then a sudden idea popped into his mind. He thought, selecting the right culture. Yesss, them with the skirts. He chuckled a deep evil chuckle. He began whispering, knowing exactly who to target. The elf who shot him with the bow. Mua-ha-ha-ha!
Aragorn son of Arathorn was at the 10th year War of the Ring anniversary with Gimli, Arwen, Legolas and the rest of the Fellowship and other people when it happened. Legolas was drinking wine when a green ray hit him. There was a buzz and a pop. He ran forward, concerned for his friend. What the hell! Legolas was a Scotsman! Then he watched helplessly as the saw Celeborn, Galadriel, Haldir, Gollum, Frodo, Merry, Pippin, Faramir, Borimir, Lurtz's Spirit, Bilbo, the Idiot who shot the bow and killed the first Uruk-hai starting the Battle of Helm's Deep, and the rest of the elves, were all turn into Scotsmen. Aragon then yelled "Gimli, Elrond, Arwen, Theoden, Eowin, Eomir, Sam, and Rohan soldier #8 get OUT!" They ran towards their horses and saw them being turned into Shetland Ponies. "THAT SUCKS!" said Rohan soldier #8. So they ran away.Gandalf walked up the stairs of the tower of Isengard to see Saruman shooting green rays at Rivendell when he yelled Saruman, "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!
"I'm not doing any thing illegal," Saruman tried to say.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING!" Gandalf screamed again.
Sigh. "I'm turning people into Scotsmen, master." said Saruman.
"THAT IS THE-" Gandalf looked apoplectic with rage. "Funniest thing I have ever heard of! Let me join you."