A/N: Thanks for the feedback! I again did some research for this chapter (and actually for subsequent chapters) into bullying. What bullying is, why people bully, and how a victim of bullying feels as a result. I recommend reading about it. (Just go to google and type in bullying and see what you find). Bullying is more than just physical abuse, and the reasons why people bully are certainly different than what I thought. So, before I get really preachy, I'm going to go on to what you are really waiting for (instead of my public service announcement on bullying) the next chapter:

Chapter 8 – Was He My Friend?

Toby sat in the circle of people at the table, and wondered why he had ever consented to this. Was some pre-adolescent crush that he admitted he should have outgrown long ago worth this? He didn't want to sit here anymore, hearing people blame Rick without ever once thinking about Rick must have felt. Toby sometimes thought about what Rick must have felt like, although he didn't know why he still did that. Rick wasn't his friend, was he?

"Emma, can you tell me something else you feel about the shooting?" Ms. Sauve said, looking at the beautiful girl sitting next to him. Toby sensed uneasiness in Emma's silence, and wondered at it. After all, in all the years he had known Emma Nelson, she was never the person that didn't tell you exactly what she felt. But ever since the shooting, Emma hadn't been the same.

"I don't know what I feel about the shooting." Emma said quietly from beside him after a pause that seemed like it went on forever.

"That's alright Emma. That's a pretty honest answer. Feelings, especially those about something so traumatic, are often very confusing." Ms. Sauve said. "Maybe someone else here can help us figure out what some of those confusing feelings are. How about you, Toby? You were Rick's friend. How does it feel to think about your friend?" Ms. Sauve asked.

"He wasn't my friend, Ms. Sauve. But the whole thing – it makes me feel sad, because it shouldn't have happened." Toby said, as he proceeded to then look angrily at Spinner and Jay.

Jay glared back at him, but for once, kept his mouth shut. Spinner just looked down at the table under the scrutiny of Toby's angry eyes.

"You are right, Toby. It shouldn't have happened. But we aren't going to change things by blaming anyone. The only thing we can do here is try to learn from what happened and move on. I was just wondering, however, why you keep saying that Rick wasn't your friend? Ms. Sauve questioned.

"Because he wasn't." Toby said.

Emma turned and looked at him. "Toby, he was your friend. You said you were following my example or something and had some kind of bet going, and after that, you guys were always talking and stuff." Emma stated as she looked at Toby with understanding in her brown eyes.

"Well, Toby, we seem to have some disagreement here. Let's talk about that day that Emma mentioned, and see if we can all figure out if he was your friend or not." Ms. Sauve said.

"Well, it was the day after the trivia try-outs, where Mr. Simpson had paired us up." Toby said, as he glanced at Emma beside him out of the corner of his eyes. He had remembered he had wanted Emma to be his partner that day, but she had already been paired up with Heather Sinclair.

"Anyway, that day, he had showed me a list he had." Toby started, but was interrupted.

"So you knew Rick had a list of people to kill and didn't tell anyone?" Spinner said, with a shocked look on his face.

"It wasn't a list like that, Spinner. I didn't know he was going to do what he did." Toby replied, with a defensive glare.

"Let's just continue with talking about how you and Rick met." Ms. Sauve said.

"Anyway, as I was saying," Toby said with a glare at Spinner, "he showed me a list of the girls in school he thought were the most…" he broke off, embarrassed.

"Continue, please, Toby. We aren't here to judge." Ms. Sauve said.

Toby looked at Emma, sitting next to him, and braced himself for her response. After all, an attractive girl's rating list was something she would find very, very offensive.

"It was a list of the hottest girls in the school." Toby said, with a slightly red face and a "please don't hurt me" look at Emma. Toby was surprised when Emma didn't react.

"Great – so the psycho had a list of girls he wanted to beat up." Jay stated, with a glare at Toby.

Ms. Sauve intervened. "That's enough, Jason." She said.

"Continue, please, Toby." She said.

"So, the next day, we made a bet. The person who got a certain girl to kiss him before the end of the day won." Toby said.

"Was that why you sent the psycho stalking that grade 9 girl?" Jay asked while giving Toby an "you idiot" look.

"Actually Jay, their bet was who could get a kiss from ME by the end of the day." Emma stated.

"That's right. And we tied, of course, so the next day, our bet was who could get the MOST kisses by the end of the day." Toby said. "I felt so sorry for Rick – everyone treated him so awfully, and he couldn't get any girl to kiss him. I asked one of Manny's friends to kiss him – I paid her 5 bucks to do it."

"You felt sorry for him? Can you explain why you felt sorry for him?" Ms. Sauve asked.

"Well, I felt sorry for him, because everyone was just so awful to him. The way the girls treated him – at least for me they pretend I don't exist, but him – I even saw one girl spit on him after he explained to her about our game and asked her nicely if she would help him out. And everyone else – at least I can be invisible – it was like Rick had a target painted on him. He was slammed into lockers and pushed and shoved – he was treated so horribly. So I wanted to save him from complete humiliation." Toby said.

Toby looked around the table at the other students sitting there, listening to his words. He could tell that Emma, Jimmy, and Spinner all felt badly for what Rick had gone through. But Jay – Toby really couldn't tell anything about what Jay was thinking or feeling from the ice-cold look on his face.

"It sounds like he was your friend, Toby." Ms. Sauve said. "What do you think?"

"He wasn't my friend." Toby said. "I couldn't be friends with someone who would do what Rick did."

"You aren't responsible for Rick's actions, Toby. Nobody is responsible for what their friends do. A person could be your friend, and still do something horrible if they are pushed hard enough." Ms. Sauve said.

Toby thought for a moment about what Ms. Sauve had said. Was that his problem? Did he feel responsible for what Rick had done? Why did he feel that way? Deep inside, Toby knew the answer to those questions – because Rick was his friend.