Disclaimer: Don't own FFVIII or any of its characters. This is all a demented dream in my twisted mind. That means, Seifer really doesn't wanna do Zell on the cafeteria table sadly.

Hey, I don't have writers block for this yet! Yay! And remember folks, this is yaoi and it's... a tad out there and yes, there is Squally in this chapter:D

Chapter One: Gangster chickens explode

Still Seifer's p.o.v

Ok, yeah I took a shower unfortunately, but it really doesn't help that my mind keeps going back to his ass and his perfect, lithe little body. So many verbs. His perfectly fuck-able body which I would love to do naughty things to.

Stupid hot dog boy.

Mmm that name fits well. Ah dammit.

No Seifer, don't think such un-pure, un-holly thoughts! Too late.

As I walk down the hall to the training area to let off some sexual tension, I see him. No, not Zell sadly. I would have loved to stare into those big blue expressive eyes. Instead, I was met with stormy gray that held an anger and coldness I didn't wanna fuck with. 'Cept I did heh.

Stupid puberty boy.

He barely even glanced at me, which of course pissed me off, and continued walking to God knows where. Wonder what he actually does do with all that time he has besides brood. Well, anyway, why train when I could spend the day torturing him? That was always fun with no Zell around.

"Squall, you little fucker, get back here!"

He fucking kept walking. What a dick, I said that relatively nicely too!

"You miserable prick! You better not be ignoring me."

Finally, I got him to look at me. And he of course said: "..."

Fuck. Sometimes, the guy could be so difficult! Jesus Christ! Maybe I should give up and go find chicken wuss. He at least... ya know talks. A lot I might add.

I'm staring to think Squally is one of those aliens... and the boy that used to be in Squall's body before the alien ate him was a very happy child and the alien absorbed all the happiness and turned him to stone inside. What makes me think of this shit?... I'll blame lust. Although, that has nothing to do... never mind. No one understands me.

He's staring at me oddly, like I haven't answered him in forever and he looks a little pissed. Good. Stupid Squall.

"What? " I ground out.

He squints at me. "Have you finally gone... insane?"

No, just sexually frustrated as HELL because of your little blond friend that is the result of me waking up with sticky shit all over my bed. You know how gross that is?

"No you twit! Now, lemme alone!"

Squall, again, looked at me funny. That is, until a very high pitched sounding voice broke through the hall. Squall's face visibly lightened... a ghost of a ...smile curved his lips before disappearing and something in his eyes...I dunno what it was, but his whole demeanor seemed to lighten up.

"SQUALL!"

That made me think.

Zell. Squall. Zell...

Squall.

Son of a bitch.

Zell came bouncing up to us, quickly glaring at me before smiling cheerfully at the Lion. The air between them seemed more than friendly and that royally pissed me off.

I smirked. Zell was mine. And I should begin showing him. Well, I'm just... ya know, not sure how. And no, I do not fear rejection because he doesn't have that option. Heh.

"Seifer... what are you doing here with Squall? You jerk!"

God, he pisses me off sometimes. He's so fuckin' afraid I'm gonna touch his precious Squall. Well, fuck him! Squall definitely ain't the one I wanna touch.

"Shut the fuck up chicken wuss, I ain't doing nothing with your boyfriend here."

Goddamn it, he started blushing. He does like Squall. Or maybe... it was just the thought of romance in general. Zell wasn't very experienced, I could tell.

He's so innocent. Fuck, I feel a nose bleed coming.

I didn't realize that Squall was heading in the direction of the dormitories and Zell wasn't following. Actually, I didn't even realize the conversation stopped. Man, I gotta quit talkin' to myself.

The chicken wuss looked... well, sad. That fuck-head musta said something rude or cold to him before walking off. Damn, sometimes I just wanna pull him in my arms when he has that lost puppy look to him.

Wait... WHAT THE FUCK?

I never had romantic feelings before, only raw, animistic lust. Should this be a good thing? So, do I wanna go over and ask him what's wrong? That would be totally and completely un-Seifer-ish. But, I want Zelly to... like, know I don't hate him. And, I wanna get laid.

Cock always wins over brain.

So I slide next to him, so tempted to reel his head back wards and push our lips together. But of course, I don't. I have no intention of raping the poor chicken!

He stares at me, most likely confused at why I'm right next to him.

"What Leonheart say to you to piss you off so much?"

Ok, this, 'Seifer's being nice to me so I think the world's ending' shit is starting to annoy the fuck outta me. Yes, I have a heart, sorta.

A fine eyebrow arches. "Why do you, of all people, care about what the fuck I feel Seifer? " He sounded angry and suspicious. Maybe he was just cautious.

Man, he really doesn't trust me. God, this boy doesn't even know the extent of what I feel for him and he could hardly give two shits about me. Why does that grip at my heart so much...?

I sighed, quite audibly might I add. "Zell, I don't care. I just don't want you moping around. It isn't fun to fuck with you when you're down okay."

Oh shit, I used his name. His eyes are all bright now, fuck, fuck, fuck!

"You've never- "

I snarl, cutting him off. "Fuck you, it slipped and it doesn't mean anything. Go chase after puberty boy, I'm sick of seeing your face."

Do I know when to ruin someones day or what?

He growled, cursing at me before speeding off. I feel bad, sorta, but then the ever present smirk draws out and I don't feel anything. Well, except emptiness.

Why couldn't I just act fucking civil for once. And to all people, the person I liked!

Maybe kicking some monster ass will make me feel better.

Zell marched down hallway to the cafeteria. He'd worked up an appetite after the episode with Seifer half an hour ago. The older boy alway made fun of him, he should know the one moment of kindness must have been a trick to get him to embarrass himself even more.

"Stupid Seifer," he mumbled to himself.

People stared at him, slowly inching away.

He glared. "Stupid people."

When he got to the lunch lady, she already knew what he wanted. Hot dogs. She piled them high, a smile plastered on her face as she handed him the tray.

He, despite his anger, smiled back, taking it and sitting down at an empty table.

Yes... the hot dogs would make him feel better and they already were, one by one.

"My precious hot dogs, you'll never call me chicken wuss or yell at me will ya? "

Zell never, in one million and two years, thought hot dogs would talk.

"Of course not Zelly, we loooooooooove you!"

"Dear Hyne!"

Zell immediately fell off the seat, scrambling to get away from the obviously possessed talking hot dog. He shivered, scared to death to re-approach the table.

A fit of deep giggles erupted, and Seifer stood, lingering over him with a trademark smirk. Zell blushed, glaring and cursing at the older boy.

"You bastard!"

Seifer raised a fine eyebrow, snickering before lending a hand to the fallen blond. "Witty aren't we?"

Zell didn't take it, instead pushing his hand away and jumping up, getting into a fighting stance. "What's with you and torturing me today! Every time I look up, you're right there laughing at me, more than usual and it's starting to piss me off!"

The taller blond snorted. "Fuck you. I'm just bored as hell today and you're the only one around here I can get a reaction out of. Don't be such a pussy chicken wuss."

Zell was seeing red. His fist darted out before he could control his emotions and a swift kick nearly landed in Seifer's side. The older boy easily blocked both, yanking Zell's wrist in his hand forward so they fell against each other. He growled in Zell's ear, hissing.

"You little bitch! Don't you ever try that shit again!"

Zell bit his lip, struggling against Seifer's raw strength. "Fine, just get offa me..."

Seifer, reluctantly, let him go. Zell fell to the ground, huffing. He rubbed his slightly bruised wrist, glaring at the taller boy.

"Fucking chicken wuss. I outta..." Seifer trailed off, a glint in his eyes alerted Zell he had a plan forming in that sick brain of his and Zell knew he wouldn't like it. People were starting to gather around the two, wonder what the hell all the screaming was about.

Seifer finally decided on something, smirking down at Zell.

"Instead of kicking the shit out of you right here, I want a favor. You do whatever I want, when I want."

Zell glared, slowly getting to his feet and quickly invading the other boy's personal space. "I fucking owe you shit dick head!" He was itching to plant his fist in Seifer's cheek and hear the satisfying crunch of bone breaking, but somehow, he refrained.

"You'll do it chicken wuss, or I'll beat your ass bloody right here in front of everyone..." He stopped, smirking viciously. "And then what will people think of you, getting your little ass kicked by a member of the disciplinary committee? And you know I can blondie. It's your choice."

Zell blushed, unsure of what to do. Yeah... Seifer really could kill him, but what would he make him do for the favor! This was seriously fucked up shit man.

Zell, swallowing his pride, nodding. "Yeah alright. What do ya want? "

The older boy smiled. "I'll let you know when the time is right Zelly. Until then, be ready."

The fighter gulped, nodding and stalking out of the cafeteria quickly, a blush staining his tanned cheeks. Oh shit, he thought, what did he get himself into!

"Squall! Ya gotta help me man!"

The silent boy sat on his bed, arms crossed at his chest, head down in thinking. His friend was in quite a hitch that was for sure. What would Seifer make Zell do exactly?

Squall drew his eyebrows together. "..."

"Squall! This is fucking CRAZY! He could like, kill me or something and all you can say is '...'"

Stormy gray eyes narrowed, lips forming a solid line of concentration. "I'm thinking," he simply stated.

Zell scrunched up his nose, bouncing nervously. "Sorry but I'm fuckin' scared baby!"

The scarred boy flinched at the endearment, even though it really wasn't directed towards him. Zell saw it and his eyes fell. Squall was always so blocked from anything human-related. The bastard couldn't even read feelings for him when they were put on a goddamn silver platter!

After more bouncing, jumping, punching the air, Squall finally stood, a vein busting on his forehead. "Enough!"

He saw the hurt look in Zell's eyes and calmed down slightly, starting off with a better tone.

"I can't protect you from what Seifer wants to do if it doesn't involve violence. And since he doesn't seem to want you hurt, you shouldn't be so worried. He probably just wants you to do something degrading. Don't worry about it."

The small blonds eyes nearly popped out. "So... you're not gonna help me? You're just gonna let him fuck with me? "

Squall nodded.

"Yes."

"You asshole."

Squall nodded, waiting patiently for Zell to storm off. He didn't budge. Dammit. Instead, he looked up dignity, pushing closed the space between them and hugging his chest.

Dammit.

"You better come after me if he tries ta rape me. You will right?"

Squall tentatively placed his hands on the little blond's shoulders, a half smirk on his lips. "Yeah I will Zell. You need some comfort? "

Zell nodded.

The light's were quickly shut off.

tbc

Phew! I love writing this! Oh and it's before they meet Irvine, Rinoa, and maybe Selphie, although I love her! pouts Beta reader for this story anyone? ;)