A/N: sorry for the delay guys. I had a baptism to attend. It wasn't that bad considering I caught up on some much needed sleep while the priest kept going on and on. Oh and before I forget, the song in the last chapter was "Just want you to know" by the backstreet boys. I'm ashamed to say that I actually like their new emo edge. On with the show…

Buffy made up some excuse as the band came to the end of their set and let before they could finish. Her frantic stare was not lost on Dawn. She smiled. This was going to be fun.

Spike sang the last song wanting nothing more than to run after Buffy and tell her he was sorry. Sorry for leaving. Sorry for no contacting her all these years. Sorry…for everything and most especially the tears that broke his heart to see.

The club busted into cheers but he barely noticed. all he could think about was how the love of his life had just ran out. This time though, he'd make sure that it wasn't left up in the air like this.

"Go after her butthead" smiled Faith. He nearly jumped out of his skin. He turned to see her standing right behind him. "What are you waiting for?"

"What about the press coverage?"

"We'll deal." He didn't have to be told twice. He ran after Buffy, stopping momentarily to give Dawn and Connor a congratulations on their engagement. (Me: forget them! Keep running! waits what a lightweight.)

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Buffy trudged downstairs wearing something comfortable now, sweatpants and a tank top. She had already wiped off what little makeup she'd been wearing. She grumbled as she went to open the door for the insistent person ringing her bell. She was just happy that Jenny was over Xander's for the night.

Pulling the door open, she had the urge to try and slam the door in the face of the visitor but he put his foot to stop it. "Luv, we have to talk" he finally said.

"No we really don't" Buffy practically growled at him. "And don't call me luv anymore. I'm not you luv anymore."

Spike felt like he had been slapped in the face, hard. He knew she was mad but… he sighed. "Look, give me five minutes. That's all I ask."

Considering his proposition, she stepped back and allowed him in. she led him into her home, the home she'd just moved into. The same home that she and her daughter had lived in for almost two months. It seemed weird for this world and her old world to collide.

Spike looked around. The kitchen was almost unused. He doubted that Buffy had learned to cook in all the years he had been gone. "Talk" she commanded walking around to make some tea.

"Elizabeth…I'm sorry. I just, I needed you to know how I felt about you so I wrote you that song. It was supposed to be I don't know…romantic maybe?"

She shook with a sudden wave of anger. "How dare you! how dare you do something like that to me. You had no right to publicize how screwed up whatever we have between us is…try and pressure me into a decision."

"No, lu…Liz" he stopped himself. He didn't want anything else setting her off. "I…I'm not pressuring you into anything. I just wanted you to know that…I still love you. I've never stopped."

"Yeah and leaving really showed that." She angrily wiped at the tears that slowly ran down her face. She didn't want him to see her weak. Instead, she leaned against the kitchen island and crossed her arms.

"Damn it Liz!" he exclaimed. "I didn't want to leave."

"But you did!" she yelled back.

"I had to!"

"I don't remember seeing a guy with a gun to your head saying leave and never contact me. I don't remember seeing you lose your memory suddenly. Did you even know that Dawn broke her arm that week or that my dad wanted us to move or that…that…" she couldn't continue. Her throat was getting blocked by the tears that she wouldn't allow to be shed.

"I'm sorry." He tried to step forward and hug her but she back away from him as much as possible. It took everything in him not to starting crying as well.

"I wanted to stay and be with you" he whispered to her. "I want us to be together forever." He chuckled lightly. "I wanted the three kids and the white picket fence…all of it. and the only person I wanted it to be with was you."

"What happened then?" her voice was as soft as his, partially from the tears and partially because she couldn't say mad just hurt.

"Liz…you don't want to know. I want you to…"

She cut him off. "what about what I want? I loved you Will more than you'll ever know. I loved you." She sniffed. William closed his eyes momentarily trying to stay strong. She said she 'loved' him, as in past tense, as in not anymore. That hurt.

He sat down. "You're dad. I left because of your dad."

"What about him?" Buffy wiped her eyes.

"Hank…he said that if I ever see you again he'd have my dad deported." He paused. "He also said that if I continued to see you, he'd send you and your sisters to boarding school. He's a lawyer with a lot of connections in the DA's office and stuff." He paused again. "I was trying to protect everyone. I left because I knew that if I stayed and I couldn't be with you, I'd die. I couldn't bare to stay and watch you date other guys and…it was too much. I tried to write you letters, hundreds of them, I just…I'd get to the mailbox and I couldn't do it. I couldn't mail them." Tears started falling from his eyes.

"I don't believe you" she said firmly.

Spike stood, wiped his eyes, and looked at her seriously. "Believe whatever you want. I'm telling you the truth. I love you Elizabeth and I love my daughter. I want to know her, hold her when she's scared, give her a kiss when she gets hurt…I want to be with you…I want us to be a family. You mean too much to me for me to give up on this. But…it's your choice. Just tell me to leave and you'll never see me again. Tell me to stay and I'll work every day for the rest of my life trying to earn your trust back, I swear. The ball's in your court pet." Not waiting for her to respond, he turned to leave calling over his shoulder "Think about it." then disappearing into the house. All Buffy heard was the slam of the front door closing. She collapsed on the floor crying.

A/N: well, I hope that was well worth the wait. I had fun writing it. don't worry there will be some Spuffy action soon and there is also a plan in the works that I don't plan to divulge soon. Almost forgot, the next chapter will most likely have more Dawn/Connor wedding planning stuff. You have been warned. REVIEW! I beg of thee!