Disclaimer: Maybe if I do it in Japanese, it'd be funny, but then I don't know Japanese now do I? Kinda like I don't own this game. Damn. No Japanese or rights to Seifer and Zell. The world wants to keep me down.

-deep breath-

Yes Ladies and Gentlemen (mostly ladies haha), I am attempting to write Seifer Almasy again and probably destroy his character. . But I shall try... laughs for all! I'm thinking of kinda putting a smudge of het in this, just another favorite couple. I love opposites, make the best couples and weird couples, like ...coughSelphieandSquallcough. -runs-

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Chapter Eight: Selphie knows all!

Stupid weird curly haired bright eyed girl... well, Zell was just lucky she suddenly screamed and he just had to go to her aide. Psh. Yeah, right. I bet he planned it just so I wouldn't beat his ass. Once a chicken, fucking always a chicken. What was I thinking, anyway, trying to let the dumbass in? In... in my personality.

Yeah, I'm sure I'll do that again. 'Cause it was just so successful.

He's not worth it. He's just some punk trying to move up in a world where no one wants him, or needs him for that matter. Who would? He useless and he can't fight properly. Tch.

Why am I wasting my thoughts on chicken wuss while I could do so much more. Like sit on my ass and stab shit with Hyperion.

Hyne, I'm so... just, ugh! I hate hate hate this feeling. Frustration, agitation, they're two things I don't wanna deal with right now, fuck, who would? The cause is some scrawny shit! What has become of Seifer Almasy over the years? Yeah, I know I'm eighteen but I've see a lot. Have I, dare I say it, lost my touch?

Me. Psh, nah. Maybe if I get my ass up, then I'll stop thinking. Think bad, fight good. Kill Squall really good. But you know, I don't wanna kill him anymore. It's strange, maybe hooking up with chickie took my mind away from the constant voice in my head screaming to spill his blood.

Or maybe I just got tired of all those fucking draws. He'd get the better of me a couple of times, but then I'd totally fuck him over and act like it never happened because, well, I'm me. I focus myself on my pride and arrogance because there's nothing else. Actually, I'm gorgeous, but that's different. Thought I'd just throw that out there though.

Plus, my street cred would be totally shot.

"Room service," a shitty accent pipes up from behind the gray door followed by a small knock. Who the hell would mutilate the Esther language in such a disgusting way? I press the magic button and I'm met with a bright smile and even brighter eyes that I think I might be permanently blinded. Goddamned Zell and his eye liner shit which makes him the culprit for my lack of eye site and the crappy accent.

I want to commit suicide sometimes...

Oh my Hyne, my hand just twitched.

"What the fuck would you ever want from me, there genius?" Oh Hyne, thank my sarcasm. I'd shoot myself without it, most definitely.

He stumbles through his sentences, scratching his head furiously for bug, but that's only a guess. "Well, um, yesse, I just came here to uh..." He looks up with a blush, totally speeding out the last of his mumbled gibberish/Irish talk. "ApologizeForActingThatWayAlthoughIStillMeanAllTheShitISaid..."

So, suicide or homicide?

I'll go with option c, thank you.

"Speak fucking clearly. I can't understand your weird ass-talk."

Actually, I can but you see, it's funnier this way. Watch.

His glares at me like I'm the reason for the world ending. Tch. "I'm not repeating it ya asshole. You figure it out, 'sides, at least I apologized!"

I smirk, raising my eyebrows and nodding my head appreciatively. "Mm, that you did chicken shit albeit a crappy one. And who's the mini-you behind your ass?"

Oooh, that girl from the parking lot. Okay, first off, who the hell would be in a parking lot at.. midnight? Well, besides me. And Zell. And the guards, but I mean, really.

"Hi! I'm Selphie! You're Seifer right? The one that picks on Zell and you two had a fight last night 'n stuff?"

Whoa, ever heard of mind your own goddamned business? Oh wait, chicken wuss must have told her his whole life story 'cause no one else ever listens to him. Poor girl. Bet she was bored as fuck.

"Yes, yes I am. Can I help you or are you just going to stand behind him and blink?"

Guess what? She blinked again, scowling. Hah, I've actually succeeded in pissing off what looks to be the kinda girl that picks flowers with chocolate in her pocket and a sun dress that just can't bring herself to hate anyone. I hate those people. A lot.

Finally, Zell moves his dense ass outta the way and yep, sun dress. What the hell is he even bringing a chick her anyway? AND WHY IS HE HERE? Why am I talking/screaming to myself...

"Well, I made Zell here," she kicked him with a smile. "-come and apologize and I hoped you'd do the same. Friends shouldn't fight." Ohhh Classy lady. Tch. Bull shit.

"Well, ain't happening toots. You know why?" Her eyes lit up before I smacked the clouds outta her ears. "We ain't friends." And I slammed the door for emphasize. Hahahaha.

"Asshole!"

Hmph. If you don't know that by now, you don't fucking know me.

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"Zell, take me to meet Squall now, since that guy was way too unfriendly. What a jerk!" The brunette sulked as the two walked down the cafeteria hall, passing by students who chatted eagerly among themselves.

Yawning and throwing his arms behind his head, Zell sighed. "Yeah well, Squall ain't no picnic in the park either, Selph."

The girl poked him in the ribs playfully, giggling as he coughed and heaved, glaring mildly at her. She tangled her hands together, looking up at him. "Well, you don't have very nice friends though." She smiled brightly at him, perfect rows of white teeth sparkling at him in the light. "Glad you have me, huh?"

"Totally, although we just met last night and you wouldn't leave me alone so I missed like, half my classes..." He said with a bitter tone, puckering his lips.

They walked in silence until the opening to the hot dog haven was in site. Zell ran the rest of the way, leaving Selphie there to blink, shrug and run after him.

"Zell! What're you doing? Are you trying to ditch me! Because it won't work!" She shrieked, coming to a stop and knocking into something hard. She glanced into to annoyed gray eyes, resisting the urge to run away.

"Watch it," the boy mumbled before pushing his way out. Selphie had a growing feeling that that was Squall. Just what the hell kinda friends did Zell have?

"Well, I never!"

"'ey Selp'ie, ow'r 'ere! 'Urry va 'ell ump!" Zell called over the chattering students, waving her over at a clear table while he kept his mouth busy with hot dogs.

Selphie flinched at the crumbs flying every where as the boy devoured each and every wiener until he ate all ten. She visibly blanched. "Hey Zell, I found Squall, I think."

Zell glanced up, licking his fingers. "Was he all cold 'nd weird 'nd anti social?"

She nodded.

He grinned. "Yep, that's Squall all right."

Selphie fidgeted, concentrating on every but the martial artist. "Did you ever like him, ya know, more than a friend? I already know how you feel 'bout Seifer."

Zell's eyes bugged out, mouth open and hanging and if he was drinking anything, it would of spewed out most definitely. "Selphie! I do not like Seifer, and... yeah I used to like Squall kinda. And we did some stuff and why am I telling you this!"

A sugary smile was all he got.

"Girls know these things."

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Tbc. :D Ah I love love LOVE Selphie. She's my hero lol! Oh and I promised smut... but it would of ruined what plot I have going on. But I promise, there will be lemon-ness.

Also... school starts really soon and I haven't finished shit! Maybe, if I'm lucky, two chapters will be pushed out before updates slow. Let's hope so.