Disclaimer: I do not own Bleach, nor any of the characters depicted within. They all belong to Kubo Tite.
Author's Notes: I think I'm a sucker for reviews. That's why I post even when I haven't completed the story yet. But after 4 revisions, I think this chapter is about as good as it's going to get. Thanks again for the lovely and long reviews, everyone. And Sophia Prester, I suspect that you may be right in your guess. Let's see if this chapter will help. :-)
Chapter 3: The Pointless
"… and so, we believe that numerous Arankaru disguised as normal souls have infiltrated Soul Society in the previous raid, waiting for another opportunity to strike at us," Soi Fong finished her report. "Right now, we don't know how many of them there are, but they seem to be staying far away from the Seireitei, nearer to the outlying districts of Soul Society."
"Thank you, Soi Fong," Captain Yamamoto said, looking over the ranks of the division heads present. Each of them met his gaze with a steely resolve, gravely aware of how little strength they had to face this new menace, but yet determined to do their best.
"While we cannot afford to spend our strength uselessly, we have a duty to protect Soul Society from these menaces that roam among us," Yamamoto rumbled. "Thus, I have no choice but to order continuous patrols around the outlying districts of Soul Society. However, we must also conserve the bulk of our strength here, in Seireitei, where it can do the most good." He paused for a moment to consider. "Thus, I'm ordering the 3rd, 5th, 9th and 11th divisions out in scattered patrols. Their mission is merely to patrol, not to engage the enemy. Should they spot a likely suspect, they are to relay the message back to the Seireitei, where the other divisions will respond with full force."
Yamamoto looked at each of the acting captains who represented their division at the leaders' meeting. The vice-captains Kira Izuru, Hisagi Shuuhei, and Hinamori Momo all looked back at him and acknowledged. Madarame Ikkaku fidgeted a little in his place, a bit uncomfortable to be among the others, but nodded as well. He was standing in as the acting captain of the 11th while Zaraki was still numb to the world.
"The rest of you," he said to the actual Captains present, "are to prepare response plans should the enemy decide to attack Seireitei again, whether from the outside or the inside. Also, you are to be assigned to more battlefield postings, as the number of Hollows have increased recently. That is all. Dismissed."
With that, the division heads slowly filed out of the room, conducting low-voiced discussions amongst themselves. Yamamoto sighed. Aizen had used the first attack to both cripple their most powerful division and plant hidden seeds of destruction within Soul Society itself. Who knew what would come in the next attack?
"Ken-chaan!" Yachiru cried from his shoulder. "You got lost again!"
"Damn it!" he yelled. "That's the fifth time!"
"Ken-chan has no sense of direction!" she bounced up and down happily.
"We only got lost because we went with your 'intuition'," he grumbled. "Argh! I'm trying another route!" He turned around, took another step, and…
He was enveloped in darkness.
He tried to scan his surroundings, but he couldn't see anything. It was like being in Tousen's ban kai all over again, except that this time he couldn't even feel anything. He didn't even have his sword. He started walking in one direction, not sure of what to do or where he was going.
He didn't care anyway.
As he walked, his steps grew heavier. There was no purpose to it. No reason to continue any more. Why should he keep on walking? Numbness crept into his soul. Perhaps it was better this way. Staying here forever, in the darkness. He sat down.
A meaningless eternity passed.
"Ken-chaan!" Yachiru's voice came out of nowhere. "Are you lost again?"
"Yachiru…" he whispered. A figure materialised in front of him. Yachiru was there, smiling happily and bouncing slightly with excitement.
"Come on, Ken-chan!" she cried out, pulling at his robe. "I know a way out! My 'intuition' says it this way!" She was tugging him along, pointing toward one part of the darkness.
"Your 'intuition' is always wrong," he muttered, completely bemused. She was dead, wasn't she? He had seen her die… he must be dreaming.
"Ken-chan!" Yachiru said, leaping up and hitting him on his head. "Get up! Stop daydreaming around." She hovered in the darkness in front of him and stretched out a faint glowing hand. "Grab my hand, Ken-chan! I know the way out this time! My 'intuition' has been fixed!"
Kenpachi stared at the hand in front of him. It was all a dream, he knew. Yachiru had died, there was no question of that. And yet… he wanted so much to grab that hand, to believe that she wasn't dead after all, and that this wasn't a dream, and he wouldn't wake up.
But he was afraid. Afraid that if he grabbed that hand, he would find out that it wasn't real after all, and that she would fade away again, and he would be left with nothing. He would rather stay in this darkness forever than to face that reality.
"Ken-chaaan! Come on!" Yachiru said, stomping her foot. "Stop wasting time, Ken-chan!" Her hand still stood outstretched to him, in the same way it had when she was a baby. In the same way it had when she had died.
Steeling himself to the inevitable, Kenpachi reached out an arm, and grabbed her hand.
And woke up.
Yachiru was gone. In his right hand, all he held was the hilt of his soul-slayer. A wave of disappointment and regret passed through him. It was a dream, after all.
"Captain?" he heard an incredulous voice gasp. Kenpachi turned his head to see Yumichika and Ikkaku gazing at him with hopeful eyes.
"What?" he wheezed. He felt a lot weaker than he expected. His voice lacked its usual spirit. But Yachiru was gone. There was no point. He wished he had stayed in the darkness. There, he could have seen her. Here, there was nothing.
"It worked! It worked! I told you it would work!" Yumichika and Ikkaku were jumping up and down, slapping each other on the back. Kenpachi wondered what the fuss was all about. Yumichika pointed at his right hand. "Your soul-slayer, Captain. I had a feeling that if we brought your soul-slayer to you and let you grasp it again, you would wake up." Kenpachi looked down at his right fist, clenching the hilt of his nameless soul-slayer. "Your will to fight is stronger than anyone else's, Captain. Letting you hold a soul-slayer would wake you up."
Kenpachi looked down at his soul-slayer in confusion. Was it really due to his will to fight? But he didn't feel like fighting any more. Not with Yachiru gone. It was because of Yachiru. Kenpachi knew it, but couldn't find the strength to tell them. She had brought him back, when all he wanted to do was to stay in the darkness. Why? Why couldn't he have stayed in the darkness?
Ikkaku brushed aside Yumichika's ecstatic ramblings and knelt down in front of Kenpachi's futon. "You've been… in a daze… for more than two weeks, Captain. We need you back to lead us as soon as you're able." He in turn began to babble on about the details of the last two weeks, but was interrupted when a stern presence filled the doorway.
"Enough," Captain Unohana said. "The patient needs to rest, now that he's woken up. Both of you, out of the room. You're lucky that I was just about to check on his condition when he woke up."
Yumichika and Ikkaku slunk out of the room, under Unohana's watchful eye. She came up to the bedside and laid a hand on Kenpachi's forehead. He could feel the tingle of healing energy flowing through her fingers, and was slightly grateful.
"Unohana," he said weakly. "What's been happening?"
"Rest for now, Captain Zaraki," she said, soothingly. "You'll need to get stronger first before you can bear the burdens that will be on your shoulders all too soon." Kenpachi found himself relaxing under her ministrations, exhausted even though he had not been doing much. He didn't want to face the burdens that Unohana was talking about. All he wanted to do was to be with Yachiru again.
His eyes closed, and darkness enveloped him once more.