Title: Alone (WIP)
Author: AliaKenobi
Category: POV, AU
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: none
Spoilers: Yes, JA- takes place when obi is 16. All events before this happen just as the JA books go.
Summary: Obi-Wan is alone on a world that has just suffered a devastating plague, a plague which has destroyed many worlds. He is alone now, and must find away to go on. BIG AU.
Feedback: yes, please, any and all comments are welcome.
Disclaimer: SW belongs to George, not me. I make no money off of these ramblings.

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…Distance…

Dead and Alone, distant and cold; these are the things I know now. My mind my heart, my very soul is saturated with it. I sit here alone, alone in knowledge, alone in being. The only one left. Except for them. Those that I cannot bring myself to even mention. Those things that sit around their fire laughing and singing, leaving me here alone and cold. Those things.

Long ago, not so long ago, things had been different. Back in the time before. Before this time. Back when I knew how to smile, back when I could laugh, back when my live bordered on happy. Those were the days of life, the days of the Force. Back when I had a name, back when I was Padawan Obi-Wan Kenobi. But that is gone now, and I am here; dead and alone, distant and cold.

There was a time when the Jedi kept the universe at peace, we would go from world to world and…. Now the Jedi are gone, most of the universe is gone. I am here now, here and now. The irony of that.

My master, before he died, would tell me to pay more attention to the here and now. Now that is all that's left. The past is little more than a memory, and I can see no future. The future is gone for me. I am the last one.

They are looking in my direction. The ones by the fire, if they see me I am dead. I must run, but I can't. I must move, must go. Can't, stuck, cold. No, there is no can't. Do, Do, I must do. I must go. I go.

My feet feel like lead blocks as I retreat, back into the foliage. Back to some, I struggle for a word, safety. Then I ask, what is safe. It is not something that is left is it? A word like hope, meaningless. Safe, hope, peace… these words are gone. They no longer have meaning.

I stop and take a breath. Look behind me, no one follows. I continue forward. There are caves nearby. I know this. A storm is coming. The clouds are becoming darker and the wind has picked up, it will be a bad storm. I must hurry for shelter, but my feet are like lead. I am moving to slow.

The rain starts to fall, I here thunder and see lightening. What is lightning hits me? A blessing. I descend down a cliff. Careful, I reprimand myself as my foot slips. The rain is harder now. Soon. Not much farther.

I feel relieved as I reach the caves entrance. It is small, to small for a large animal. I go in. There is no light, but I am used to that now. There hasn't been light for a long time.

I sit and try to remember light. The light, the force. It is too distant. I give up. They would have said something about that. I can hear master Yoda in my head. "Give up you should not. Give up, Jedi do not" I hear my voice, a crack of distorted laughter. There are no more Jedi. There is no more light. The Force is not with me.

…Dream…

I sleep. But it is bad, fitful, hurting. Memories of the past, of those first moments when the universe became cold.

I can see my master clearly he has a smile, so reassuring, as if to tell me that everything will be fine. But that doesn't last long. His skin turns to yellow and his eyes go red. He is weak now, and sick. He dies, everyone dies. I run.

I run away, away from the cities, away from the people, away from the corpse of my master. I trip and fall there is a body there. Dead, maggots have infested it. The features of what once was a young girl have become distorted, eaten away. I struggle to keep the bile from rising but I cannot stop it. I am going to be sick. I stagger away from the girl and drop to the ground.

I struggle to remain stoic, to not cry to be detached, but I can't. I cry. I stay there for a long time and try to think. What was happening? But I cannot. I feel as if I am sinking, it is not something I can stop.

For a long while I stay there. Night descends and I do not move. I hear some voices nearby, two men. I struggle to hear them.

"Look here is another one." One says. I know he is talking about the girl.

"Crake, there is two." The other one says. Crake must be the first ones name, I file that away.

I hear their footsteps come closer. I am tense. "Wait," says Crake, he is standing next to me. I can't bring myself to open my eyes. "This one is still alive." the other one comes closer. "He's not sick." I can hear one of them say, I am not sure which. I hear Crake bend down and look closely at me. I feel his hand on my shoulder shaking me. I mumble a little, not quite able to form coherent words. I can feel their smiles in the force, pure joy. I open my eyes to look at them.

Crake has dark skin and strange bright green eyes that almost seem to glow in the dark. The other one has light skin and is hidden inside a lot of baggy clothes.

"What." I manage. They just look at me. I wonder for a second what they where expecting. Did they want me grateful, smiling, happy? There was a dead girl laying only a few feet away. I wasn't about to be happy about anything.

"You are the Jedi kid." The light skinned one said suddenly. I nodded. "Hey you want to come with us. Wouldn't want to be out here alone." I think for a moment. I know I don't want to go with anyone. I want to be alone. I want to die. I nod "Yes, I don't want to be out here by myself either." A blatant lie. They smile. I stand and walk with them.

They are a loud-mouthed pair. I learn that originally there had been more with them. Brax, I learned the light ones name, had a wife and two children. But they had fallen, died. Gotten sick. Crake had several friends. They where dead too. They said they had been walking for days. He was the first healthy person they had found.

I shared little beyond my name with them. They thought that strange. I thought it smart. They would die soon, or I would. There was no doubting it. Brax was turning yellow and Crake had a cough. It would not be long. This I knew. Somehow I knew also it would not be me who stopped going.

…Fire…

I woke up. There was a stench in the air. I was used to it. Brax and Crake lay rotting in a corner of the cave. I could hear rats chewing away at their bodies. They where making a fine meal for someone. Something. At least life still existed in some form. As distorted as that thought is.

I go to the mouth of the cave and take a deep breath. The air is much fresher out here. It still stinks. I can feel my stomach growl, hunger. I look around. Somehow it is a bright day, but still there is no light.

I climb down the cliff. There is a river below. I need to boil the water to drink it. I make a fire. How strange it is, Jedi survival training. I have no pot to boil the water in. I take some stones and throw them in the fire.

There is a stone bowl next to where I have made the fire. I had cut it out weeks ago with my lightsaber. Back when it still worked. I take my outer tunic off and scoop water into it. Carry it to the stone bowl. Pour it in. Carefully I get the stones out of the fire; they are hot.

Before now I would have used the force, but now I use a stick. There is no more light, no more force for me to use. Not enough to go around. I cycle though the rocks, dropping them into the fire, into the water, back and forth. It takes me an hour to get the water hot. Another to make sure the toxins is wiped out. I let the water cool a bit. Drink it, but not all. I take a packet out of a pouch on my belt. Last one. Pour it into the still warm water. The powder solidifies into a stew. I taste it. It is disgusting. I get two more stones out of the fire and throw them in. I have no eating utensils, so I resort to scooping the scoop out with my hands. I feel like some sort of animal.

I finish the meal, knowing it is the last I have. Soon I will have to do something. I can't last forever out here. Sooner or later, something will happen. I will die.

The fire is low. I look around. There are some logs across the river. I debate if I want to go in. this river frightens me. It is the bodies, and the dead fish, floating in it. The murkiness. No I decide to make a trek, I walk along the river's edge in search of something to burn. I have to walk for a while. Almost an hour before I reach a wooded patch.

I scrounge about, taking every piece I can carry. As I turn to leave the patch, I notice some bright colored bits. I drop the pile of wood and head toward it. There are three more bodies here. It looks like that had made some sort of camp before they all died. Two humans, a twi'lik, and a bith by the looks of them. They are mostly eaten, I could tell they where not locals.

I feel disgusted with myself as I go into their bags, pockets, and pouches. I look for anything useful, mostly food. Maybe some batteries that I could retrofit to my 'saber. I find a few pouches of food, some matches, and a knife. Nothing else of use. I go back to my pile of wood. Back to my fire.

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