Bounty Hunter Diaries
by Gemini

Chapter 10: Hilde Schbeiker's Mom Is Very, Very Scary

Rated PG-13 for Pirate-like cursing.

Disclaimer: As much as I would love to be able to lay claim to Duo Maxwell (heh heh) I can't, because the only thing I currently own is my Kenshin plushie, and even he's licensed! Long story short, Gundam Wing in owned by other people.



During my two year tenure as a mid-level manager, I received a total of six paper cuts,
one staple in my pinkie and a coffee burn. During my four day stint as a bounty hunter,
I had been hit over the head twice and stabbed. As I lay barely conscious in
my hospital bed, I wondered if maybe I had chosen the wrong career. Perhaps I shouldn't
have turned my nose up at the fast food jobs. I mean, I'm fairly certain I'd rather
smell like grease all the time than nurse a stab wound.

Speaking of stab wounds…I gently pressed my hand to my side to assess the damage. There
were several layers of gauze between me and my stitches, and about 150 mg of painkiller
between me and the pain. I felt hazy and dull, whatever they had given me was potent
enough to make me forget my own first name, which I was fairly certain started with an H.
Or maybe an S.

Something shifted at the end of my bed and it wasn't me. The little machine that monitored
my heart rate started beeping much faster, in tune with my racing pulse.

I struggled to sit up, but it hurt so much that I stopped and flopped onto my back with a groan.
Whatever or whoever was at the end of my bed moved again, into my line of sight. It was Duo. I
sighed with relief and rubbed my eyes to bring him into focus.

"You're awake." He said matter-of-factly.

I nodded and got a good look at him as he moved closer to me. He looked terrible, not unlike
Heero had when he appeared at my doorstep…how long ago? A day? Two?

"How long have I been out?" I asked.

"A day." He replied, his voice hoarse.

I nodded, internally relieved that I hadn't pulled a Rip Van Winkle and slept through
a decade or something. I studied him again. "You look like shit." I said with a raised eyebrow.

He smiled. "You're no oil painting, either." He said, his relief obvious in his voice.
He moved closer until he was standing by the head of my bed.

"Yeah, well, I was kidnapped and stabbed by a homicidal maniac. What's your excuse?" I asked,
trying to joke around with him.

"I was really worried about you." The teasing note had vanished from his voice, replaced by something
strangely…vulnerable. "When I saw that video…" He stopped and his hands clenched spasmodically at
the metal railing of my bed. "I shouldn't have gotten you involved…"

"Duo, I'm a big girl. I got myself involved." I said quietly. I rested my hands on his and he relaxed
somewhat, releasing the metal rail from his death grip. "I don't blame you."

He was silent for a minute, his expression going through several changes until it settled on determined.
And then he did something that I would have never expected. He kissed me. The bastard kissed me!
He leaned down, cradled my face between his hands and gently brushed his lips against mine.

I was too surprised to respond. I mean, look at it from my perspective. I was lying in a hospital
bed, looking like complete crap and here was this amazingly sexy guy I had known less than a full
work week locking lips with me! It boggled my mind.

He pulled away slightly and looked right into my eyes. What I saw in his made me shiver.
They were dark with all sorts of emotions: anger, fear, hope, affection, sadness and something
else…something quite new to me.

"Is this okay?" He asked me quietly, resting his forehead against mine.

Well, being macked on while in a hospital bed was probably bad etiquette, but frankly,
I didn't care. What I saw in his eyes…I would trust Duo Maxwell with my life and, maybe more.

On occasion, I read those smutty five dollar romance paperbacks they sell in the check-out
lanes of grocery stores; before today, I always rolled my eyes whenever the heroine and hero
ended up falling madly in love after a day or two. But now, now I was beginning to wonder if
there was some truth to the idea. Duo Maxwell walked into my life four days ago and now
maybe I'm falling in love with him… or maybe it's lust. But it's certainly something.

I grabbed his shirt and kissed him back, this time it was more than a chaste brush of lips.
I leaned back into a more comfortable position, still holding onto his shirt so he couldn't
get away. He didn't seem too inclined to escape. Instead, he braced his arms on either side
of me to hold his weight while he did things to my mouth with his tongue that made my toes curl.

We probably would have happily died from lack of oxygen if someone hadn't cleared his throat
in my doorway.

Reluctantly, Duo pulled away and we both glared at the person who had interrupted us.

Heero didn't seem particularly ruffled by our death glares. "Well, I see you are well
on your way to recovery, Hilde." He said in his usual monotone.

I turned bright red while Duo, my great defender, merely chuckled. I turned my nasty
look from Heero to him. He coughed and scratched his head in an embarrassed manner.

Heero strode into the room, followed by an amused looking Quatre. Good lord. If I never saw
any of these men again, I think I would die happy. I glanced at Duo and decided that I wouldn't
mind seeing more of him, but the other two…they had to go.

"Sorry to interrupt, but we need to take your statement." Quatre said, pulling out a tape
recorder and putting it on the table next to my bed. The little red recording light blinked
stupidly at me. "We need to know exactly what happened."

Duo flopped down onto the rather uncomfortable looking molded plastic chair next to my bed
and crossed his arms.

"You need to leave, Maxwell." Heero said.

Duo shot him a dirty look. "No way. I'm staying right here."

"Look, we've already bent all sorts of rules just to let you in here. Even her family
has been kept away. So do me a favor and get lost." Heero said angrily.

My family. I had completely forgotten about them. My mother must be beside herself.
"Where is my family? Are they okay?" I asked Quatre, since Heero and Duo were currently
too busy with their pissing contest to ask.

"They're fine, just worried. They've been here since you were brought in.
Sally has been keeping them updated on your condition, and she brought them
in here to see you twice." He replied, smiling in a reassuring way.

"Duo." I said quietly, immediately getting his attention. "Go and tell my family that
I'm awake and okay. They must be worried sick."

He began to protest, but I gave him my best puppy dog eyes. "Please?"

He sagged. "All right." He said, brushing a stray bit of hair off my forehead
in a manner that was both tender and possessive. He turned on Heero and became
all business again. "If you upset her, Yuy, I swear I will kill you."

Heero waved him off.

Duo stalked away, leaving me with Grumpy and his partner Happy.

"Relena wants to come down and visit you. She'll probably come by tomorrow afternoon."
Heero said gruffly.

I nodded. "I tried to visit her the other day but Attila the Nurse wouldn't let me up here." I replied.

Quatre grinned. "Oh, you mean Helen. She and Duo were at each other's throats last night."

A mental image of Duo fighting with Arnold Schwarzanegger in a nurse's uniform made me giggle.

Heero immediately killed my fun by tossing some glossy photographs onto my bed.
I recognized the warehouse I had been held in and paled slightly.

"Just so you know, Une is in protective custody upstairs. You broke her nose and knocked
out a few teeth." Heero said.

I smiled nastily. "Good. I wish I had done more."

Heero didn't respond. He glanced at Quatre, who picked up the interrogation ball.
"We saw the video Trieze made, Hilde. Duo showed it to us. In fact, we had just
finished watching it when you called Heero's cell phone."

"How did Duo take it?" I asked quietly.

"Very badly." Heero replied. "I would not trade places with Trieze Khushrenada
for anything in the world."

I sighed and leaned back into my pillow. "Okay, so, you saw the video. What do you want to know?"

"How you found out about Une." Quatre said.

I closed my eyes and told them everything. How I recognized pictures of Une from newspaper
clippings, how I went to see Catherine, everything.

"You don't check your messages, do you?" I cracked open an eye and narrowed it at Heero.

"What do you mean?" He asked.

"I called you before Trieze got me. I told everything to your machine."

He looked honestly surprised. "I see."

I felt completely drained and going to sleep seemed like the most wonderful idea I'd ever had.

"Hilde, please try and stay awake, okay?" Quatre gently took my hand and gave it a squeeze. "We'd
rather not drag this out any longer than necessary."

I blinked and focused on them. "Sorry. What else do you need to know?"

Heero crossed his arms and frowned. "Is there anything else you remember? Important details?"

"Um, not really…Trieze didn't talk much to me. He just slapped me around, stabbed me and
then called it a day." My patience was wearing thin. I honestly didn't have much to say to him
and all I wanted to do was sleep.

"Hilde! My god! Are you trying to send me to an early grave?" My mother's shrill voice
rang out, effectively putting an end to Heero and Quatre's interrogation.

I groaned and closed my eyes, trying to play possum, but mom was having none of it.

"Don't you try and avoid me, young lady!" She lectured.

I cracked open an eye and tried to smile at her. "Hi, mom."

Her hands were on her hips and she was glowering at me. Behind her, my father and my sister,
Gretchen, stood silently, they both knew better than to try and interrupt my mom when she was
in one of her moods. And she certainly was in one of her moods.

Gretchen shot me a sympathetic look and my father rolled his eyes.

"…and then they tell me you've been working as a bounty hunter?! And that you've been
stabbed! How do you think we felt when those policemen came to the door?! You're father
was beside himself!" Mom was on a roll.

Quatre stepped forward to try and soothe her, but she would have none of it.

"Don't you try and defend her, young man! She is completely over her head! She can't
even boil water without some sort of disaster and now people are telling me that she
has a GUN?"

I sighed and tried to sink deeper into the mattress, as though I could go right through it
and disappear from my mother's angry glare.

"AND you were wearing the most disgusting pair of jeans when they brought you in! Sally
gave me your clothes and I was horrified! Haven't I taught you to always keep your clothing
in good repair? And your underwear! How could you keep such a terrible looking pair?!"

Oh my dear lord in heaven, let me die. Please, just let me die. It figures that the one
time I wore my emergency pair of underwear, I would end up in the hospital, so that all
and sundry would see them. And if that wasn't humiliating enough, my mother was making sure that
anyone who might have missed the spectacle of my grossest pair of undies was being told about
them right now. I glanced over at Quatre, who looked about ready to explode with laughter. He
was only a few inches away from my bed. I wondered if I could grab his gun and shoot myself before
my mother began talking about my bedwetting problem and the time I threw up on Sister Mary Catherine
after eating an entire box of communion wafers during my Sunday School's Christmas Pageant. It was
probably the first timea sheep had tossed its cookies on a nun. Then again, maybe I could just shoot
my mom. Nothing fatal, just a little wound to keep her quiet.

Sadly, Quatre, as though sensing my thoughts, moved away from my bed and out of reach. Damn.

"Uh, mom…I'm fine, really…" I tried to soothe her, but she was not about to let me off the hook.

"And wait until I get my hands on that Wufei! What was he thinking, sending you out on such
dangerous missions?!" She rode roughshod right over me and continued her lecture.

"Um…well, I…" I shouldn't leave Wufei twisting in the wind, not after I all but forced him to
give me the job with blackmail. I tried to set the record straight, but then Sally came in and
I couldn't continue. Sorry, Wufei. Oh well, he'd probably rather face my mom than Sally any day.

"Aunt Lena, I'm sorry, but your five minutes are up. Hilde's been through a lot and she needs her
rest." Sally said gently, throwing me a dirty look promising lots of pain. No doubt her collusion in
this whole mess had come out and she'd gotten in trouble, too. Her mother could be just as scary as
mine.

My mom sputtered to a stop and nodded, but not before giving me a few parting words letting me know
just how much I'd screwed up. Oh man, was I in for it later.

Sally led my mom out the door. My dad came to my bedside before leaving and dropped a kiss on my
cheek.

"I think it's cool, you being a bounty hunter." He whispered with a smile. "Just don't go and get
yourself hurt anymore, okay, sweetheart?"

I nodded.

Then he left and it was Gretchen's turn. My younger sister had hearts in her eyes. "Who was that
absolutely delicious man that came to talk to us? I think he said his name was Duo?" She was
practically drooling.

I felt a small flash of jealousy. Gretchen was twenty-one, a former cheerleader and homecoming queen.
Gorgeous and flirtatious, she had men everywhere falling to her feet and I didn't want her
within a mile of Duo.

"Back off." I said through clenched teeth.

Gretchen's eyes widened and she grinned. "No worries. I would never think of stealing a man
from my big sister." She paused at my slight frown. "Anymore, anyway." She amended.

"Well, what about those two? They're not bad looking. Either one available?" She jerked her thumb in
the direction of Heero and Quatre, who were standing in the corner, talking in low voices.
She had been whispering, but evidently, those two had pretty damn good hearing.
They both looked up at us, alarmed.

"No." I replied quietly, glad her back was to them so she couldn't see their matching deer in
the headlights expressions.

"Damn. Oh well. There's some pretty cute doctors around here. See you later, Hilds!" She patted my
head and flitted off, no doubt to see if she could snare herself an MD. So much for being beside
herself with worry.

I rolled my eyes at her perky retreating backside. Now more than ever, all I wanted to do was
sink back into oblivion. My family did that to me.

Quatre cleared his throat. "Interesting family." He said with a wry smile.

"You have no idea." I muttered crossly. "That wasn't even a tenth of my mother's true evil
power."

Heero made a sound that might have been a laugh, but when my eyes darted suspiciously over to
him, he was poker-faced as usual.

"Well, if you can't think of anything else, we'll leave you to rest." Quatre said, still looking
terribly amused.

I nodded and closed my eyes, hoping that I wouldn't have nightmares about my mom and my gross
underwear.

Before I slipped off into dreamland, I heard the sound of someone coming back into my room. I
opened my eyes, hoping it wasn't a nurse with a needle or Heero with another question, or God forbid,
my mother with another lecture, and saw Duo settling himself into the uncomfortable plastic chair.

"You're back." I think I sounded as surprised as I felt.

He nodded. "Your mom just about skinned me alive. She's scary." He said gravely.

"I'm sorry. Hurricane Lena hit you unprepared. It must have been quite a traumatic
experience." I held out my hand and he took it.

"I think I'll live." He replied and kissed my hand.

"Are you going to stay here all night?" I asked, giving the chair he was in a once-over.

"Yup. I'm not letting you out of my sight, not as long as Treize is running around loose."
He squeezed my hand, his expression dark for a moment.

"Well, that chair doesn't look too comfortable." I had an interesting idea and skillfully set
out to see if I could make it a reality.

"It's not too bad." He replied with an arched brow, wondering where I was going with this.

I took my hand from his and patted my bed. "There's not a hell of a lot of room, but as long as
you don't hog the blankets, you can sleep here, with me."

He grinned naughtily. "Really?" How can one man make a single word sound so…sexy?

"But only sleep, pervert. I have a headache AND a knife wound." I shot back.

He nodded solemnly. "All right, nothing kinky."

He lowered the metal railing and crawled into bed with me, carefully adjusting our positions
so that he wasn't in danger of pulling out my IV or bothering my stitches or his own. I ended up on my good side,
facing his chest, my head resting on his arm. His other hand was on my hip, careful not to
touch my wound. He smelled good, like soap and a little bit of gunpowder and sweat. It was nice.

"Good night, Hilde." He said quietly, brushing a kiss across my forehead. "Sweet dreams."

I kissed his Adam's apple, which was the closest thing I could kiss without disturbing our
positions. "Night, Duo."

If being kidnapped means I get to fall asleep in the arms of an incredibly gorgeous man, then,
please, let me get kidnapped more often.

A/N: *Waves* Um, hi! I hope you haven't forgotten about this story! I do hope to finish it up soon. I always hate it when
an author doesn't finish a story, don't you? I'm not about to become a hypocrite, so, onward! I actually wrote this chapter
almost six months ago, but I was never satisfied with it. Today I sat down and edited the hell out of it and I'm actually
quite pleased. I hope you like it too. Less talk and more action in the upcoming chapters and I promise, Hilde will get
a few shots in! No more Miss Nice Bounty Hunter.

Thanks for all your reviews and I hope you're enjoying reading the story as much as I'm enjoying writing it!