Chapter 18: Bulma

This morning my sister came to see me. She came with a gift, a cat," They are sisters," she told me, "Mine is black and yours is white. Do you like her?"

"Yes, She's very pretty," I say picking her up and into my arms," You're pregnant?"

"Oh yes but how did you-"

"Know. I know. Don't worry I knew since yesterday."

She put her hand to her chest, "You know me again? That's great I miss you so much. I think you should come to my house and stay with me for a while."

"I'm sorry but that won't be happening," I turn back to look at her.

"We- Why? Look at you! Look at this place! All I see is sickness and grief you are not in a good place. Why can't you understand that?"

"Why do you have to question this? I'm fine. Are you?"

"Of course I am but Bulma I can see that you're not. Why can't you see it?"

"I'm not in any danger."

"You're not? Are you sure? You just tried to kill yourself and you're not in any danger? If you're not in any danger then why did you do it? WHY," she was screaming by now.

I didn't know what to say at first, so I dismissed it with a little laugh, "Sister let's not talk about the past."

"Why not? I want to know."

"The past means nothing to the present my dear sister. Now please let's change the subject."

"No I will not! Is it not the past that has brought us to the present? Is it not then that makes now? So let's talk about it."

"Yes, but it is also time to let go and forget. I have."

"Do not lie to me if you can not convince yourself. Come on. If we talk you may feel better. I miss talking to you. Don't you miss me?"

"Yes I do. But right now my only concern is my daughter."

She didn't respond for a moment then her voice was quiet," Do you want to know how I am? Do I concern you?"

Her words went through me and hurt me. I did not know what I had done to her I had not meant that I didn't care, only that my daughter was in trouble. So I spoke back quietly, "How are you?"

She looked at me and sighed, "Horrible. I've been worried sick about you. I know I've failed you some how but I don't know what I can do to make it better, it's driving me crazy."

"You! You're going crazy? What the hell do you think I've been going through? Oh I'm in fucking heaven and I feel as sane as ever. It's not fair we are supposed to be equal. We're supposed to have the same life style. I get slammed against the wall while you get hugged. I have to fuck him every fucking night while you have a choice. Who's going crazy?"

"I didn't know! Why do you think I came to get you?"

"I don't know."

"I want you back. I want you to come with me. We grew so far apart that I want our bond back. I really do."

"How can I say no. You're my sister, we were never anything less, but I cannot leave this place. Do you understand?"