Yu Yu Hakusho Inversed
Chapter 19
October 21, 2005

"Found some aspirin," Toguro announced. "It should help reduce the fever."

"Yeah?" Hiei kept his eyes on the sleeping figure of his former captor. "Please tell me you didn't find it on the floor or something."

"What sort of moron do you take me for?" Toguro asked irritably. "Actually, the obnoxious orange-haired kid had an entire bottle on him." The giant propped Kurama up and gently nudged him awake. "I need you to swallow something," he told the half-asleep redhead. "You'll feel better."

"I'm not taking any damn sedatives," Kurama grumbled, looking surprisingly malicious for someone barely awake.

"Kurama, this is Otouto, not Karasu. It's only aspirin."

Hiei watched Toguro try to persuade Kurama to swallow the medicine, but his mind was elsewhere.

Of course he'd already known that Kurama and Suichi Minamino were one in the same- at least, he'd strongly suspected. But it'd still been somewhat startling to hear that fragmented autobiography spill from the gangster like that. It had to have been due to the effects of the fever, surely, but he'd still heard it all the same.

This Kurama- Suichi- whoever- and he were in some ways more alike than he would have once thought, and he discovered that he was beginning to feel a connection of sorts toward Kurama, and pity even.

As he pondered over this, Toguro persuaded Kurama to take the aspirin, and the redhead settled back into a reclining position on the bed, eying everything with a more aware expression on his face, though he did not say anything, really. When Toguro, satisfied that for the moment Kurama was fine, announced that he was going to commandeer Daddy-O's television set to see if anything regarding Karasu or the incident at the Minamino house was mentioned, Kurama only mumbled, "Don't trust everything you see on the news, Otouto."

"Keep an eye on him," Toguro mumbled to Hiei on his way out. The billionaire nodded, and looked back over to Kurama.

The transvestite looked out the window. "It'll be morning soon, won't it?"

Hiei nodded. "I think so."

Kurama sighed, not the sigh of one who is disappointed, but rather of one who is exhausted, perhaps in more than just the physical sense. "I miss it, you know? The sun. I can't recall the last time I set foot out into the light, walked down the street and felt the sun on my face. I think I started to dodge the light, even before I became a thief. I think I didn't want people staring at me, at a boy wearing girls' clothes. It always made me feel bad, like their eyes could see right through me or something. I've missed the sun."

Hiei fathomed that if those people's eyes were truly capable of seeing through Kurama they'd see the person crippled by inconsiderate minds and then maybe they'd stop staring. It wasn't fair. "When did you start dressing like a woman?" he asked softly.

A few days ago, Kurama would have perhaps slapped the other man, or at least offer a snappish retort rather than answering such a personal question- this specific one he'd never answered before.

Instead, he answered the question honestly. "Kuronue had brought home some various items that he planned to sell- it wasn't until later that I found out he had actually stolen them- and this included women's intimate clothing. They caught my eye, for some reason. It made me feel weird, and that feeling was probably helped by the one of many horrible comments my mother said to me before throwing me out.

"I don't really know what I was thinking, but I donned this stolen lingerie. And I remember that I was standing in front of this mirror, looking at myself in this women's clothing, and then Kuronue and one of his co-workers walked in."

"Yeah?" Hiei tried to imagine what it must be like to be caught like that. A mixture of awkward and terrifying, he figured. "What happened?"

"I froze," Kurama replied. "I felt humiliated. The other mechanic began laughing at me and making some dumb ass remarks. But Kuronue hauled off and punched him, and told him that if he ever said anything that stupid again he'd have to take all his meals through a straw for the remainder of his life." The redhead smiled in remembrance. "He said he thought I looked hot like that, and then he shooed out the other guy and shut the door and... he took the rest of the afternoon off to show me just how hot he found that ensemble." He shrugged. "I don't know just why I liked wearing women's clothing, but I continued doing so, and Kuronue didn't object, and anybody who said anything nasty about it became well-acquainted with Kuronue's knuckles."

"He stood up for you," Hiei observed, stating the obvious.

"Yes, since we first met. Quite fortunate too, as I was just thing beginning to grow familiar with the realities of the world, harsh as they often seemed, especially toward me..." He trailed off. "I must sound pretty sorry for myself, huh?"

"Not really." Hiei already knew that it must be hard to have desires and affections dubbed weird, or even perverted, by an empty-headed society afraid of progression. This society wanted them to change, and no matter what lies and illusions anybody, even themselves, created, such a change was completely impossible. Unfair as it was, Kurama's tendency to cross-dress probably served as the bait that such people would eagerly bite at for an ego-boost. "What'll you do after this is all over?" he asked.

"After what is all over?" the redhead asked.

"This Karasu mess. What'll you do afterwards?"

"There's an afterwards?" Kurama asked dryly. "I don't even know if I'll survive this- Karasu's rather stubborn when he really wants something."

"You speak as though you've given up. What you're talking about isn't going to happen. You-"

"But what do you care?" Kurama interrupted. "You'll be going home to your mansion or whatever, yes? Or continue that search of yours I've heard bits and pieces about?"

"I don't believe there's any need to continue searching," Hiei said quietly. "I've found the someone."

"Yukina," Kurama guessed, though he really didn't care.

"You."

Kurama raised his eyebrows. "What?"

"You. I want to take you with me back to Makai Estates- it's completely different then the city. It's better there, I promise. You could have anything you'd ever want or need there- it'd be much better than the life you're leading right now." Hiei eyed one of Kurama's bare arms, noting how bony it was. "And I'd hire the best cooks I could find, and I would have them fatten you up," he said. "You wouldn't have to drink anymore, and you wouldn't have to worry about anything ever again, because I'd take care of you."

Kurama studied the billionaire suspiciously, wondering if this was some cruel jest. Hiei's face was earnest. "And you would have me?" he inquired. "Like some pet to keep?"

"No," Hiei said hastily. "Not a pet, certainly not a pet- a companion, a friend. And certainly not to keep; to love."

"Love?" Kurama gave him an odd look. "And what makes you so sure that I love you back?"

"You just spilled your guts to me-"

"- Because of a fever. Besides, Toguro was here too."

"You told me about Suichi before, when you were perfectly fine. Did Toguro know about Suichi?"

"No. But Karasu knows. Hm? Maybe I told him."

"Did you?"

"No," Kurama admitted. "At least, not that I recall..."

"So, I interpret that all to be gestures of trust, like the kind one would show to somebody they felt close to."

"And so because of that you suggest that I love you?"

"Maybe," Hiei replied. "Am I right?"

He received yet another odd look. "Doesn't matter," answered Kurama. "Whether I do or not- you can't love me."

"I can," protested Hiei. "Be it friendship or romantic, it's some strong connection. Can't that be love?"

"Yes... But that's beside the point. Friend, romantic interest, whatever- whether you love me or not, you can't, understand?"

"And why not? If this is because we're both men, so what? People must eventually learn to open their minds toward-"

"You should know full well by now that I don't give the slightest damn about gender," interrupted the redhead. "You don't get it, do you? Somebody wants to kill me right now. Mind you, I don't intend on letting Karasu have his way, not without a fight, but there are some other factors in addition. Have you forgotten what I am? The Yoko, leader of the Youkai. People have done some rather unseemly stuff under me, you know, and I as an individual have anything but a clean record. It's probable that after all of this, if I don't escape, I'll be arrested. And if that happens, I'll go to prison, and I'll be there the rest of my life... Unless they decide to execute me- do they still do the death penalty?"

Hiei shook his head. "No, not often. I think everyone's begun to realize how absurd it is." Kurama nodded. "Look, if imprisonment is what you're worried about, we could try to get around it. I have money; I could-"

"Absolutely not," Kurama cut him off. "I don't want you making any bribes for me- shit like that only contributes to why the courts are so crooked." He shot Hiei a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry, but I don't see any way that I could go home with you, so you may as well forget about it. I'm a lost cause."

"No you're-" They both jumped when they heard an explosion, quite close by.

"What a persistent ass," Kurama muttered. "Though I expected no less from him." He rose from the bed and limped toward the stairs.

"Do step aside, Toguro," Karasu said coolly. "The altar is waiting; I must collect my bride." Toguro moved to block his advancement into the garage.

"Haven't you heard, Karasu?" Yukina asked. "It's bad luck to see the bride before the wedding."

Karasu narrowed his eyes. "That mouth of yours has you in enough trouble already, Yukina. I wouldn't make things worse for yourself if I were you."

"There isn't going to be any wedding," Toguro growled. "And no bride. You have your gang now; leave Kurama out of it."

"Ah, but I still need Kurama- I want his finances, you see, his property."

"And what would be the point of that now?" demanded Toguro. "You destroyed who knows how much of the house-"

"But that can be fixed, with money."

"And what if all the money was in the house? What if you've unintentionally made your 'bride' penniless again? Isn't he worthless to you then?"

Karasu appeared as though he hadn't thought of that. Then his eyes became malevolent slits. "If he's worthless to me, then there's no point in keeping him around any longer, is there?" Toguro continued to block him. "The days when you virtually owned me are over, Toguro; I've long since rose up above you. Move." When Toguro didn't, Karasu whipped out a gun and shot the giant in the foot.

Even as Yukina and Bui rushed toward the two of them, he kept his gun trained on Toguro. "Kurama always did like you better," he declared. "I suppose he sensed more good in you than in I. Too bad- had you brought yourself to sleep with him, you might have been his next Kuronue."

He made for the stairs. "Don't even think about it," he said, pointing the gun at Yusuke before he, Keiko, or Kuwabara could even move. 'I'll admit that that punch of yours caught me off guard, but don't count on dumb luck twice in a row." He darted upstairs.

Kurama seemed to be waiting for him at the top. "Good evening, Foxy," he said in a mock-cordial tone. "I do hope you've been resting- Why, you play the role of blushing bride quite well," he sneered, noting the redhead's feverish appearance.

"Cut the bullshit, Karasu," Kurama interrupted icily. "Do you intend to kill me with that?" he inquired, gesturing with his left hand toward Karasu's gun.

Karasu examined the gun thoughtfully, as though having just now seen it. "Eventually, perhaps," he replied coolly. He eyed his former unwilling bed partner, noting that he could not see Kurama's right hand, wondering if it held a gun. "But not right now; it would be rather difficult for the surgeon to operate on a corpse, correct?"

"This 'surgeon' won't be performing on anything," hissed Hiei, his body tensing up.

Karasu glanced at Hiei, only now noticing the billionaire's presence in the room. "Well now," he sneered, looking at Hiei, the bed, and then at Kurama. "And you were angry with me before?" Kurama glared. "Enough of this; come with me now, and maybe I'll be gentle on the honeymoon- Unless you want to fight, and then I'll make it like that other time..."

Kurama's already pale face blanched white. Hiei noticed, realized what Karasu must be referring to, and felt ill. "You..." he growled, seeing red and going for Karasu-.

Kurama tensed as Karasu pulled the trigger and Hiei crumpled to the floor, blood squirting up from his leg. Karasu raised his gun again. "Toguro in the foot, Jaganshi in the leg- where shall I shoot you if you won't come?"

A cracking noise answered him; Karasu's gun flew out of his hand, making a clattering noise as it skidded across the floor of the loft. Karasu cried out in pain as Kurama cracked the bullwhip again. "Nowhere, Karasu."

Both he and Karasu, and Hiei the wounded spectator on the floor, were momentarily distracted by the din of police sirens approaching. Kurama recognized the source of the sound first, and smirked. "Well now, Karasu, you really must love drawing attention to yourself, huh? That's the second time you've attracted the police to us in one week. We're both going to jail, you do know that? Wonder if the bad boys in there will make you into a prison bitch?"

"Speak for yourself, Suichi!" growled Karasu. He made a mad dash for the gun; Kurama followed swiftly, despite his wounds, adrenaline pumping through his body. Karasu picked up the gun, but Kurama tackled him with as much force as the redhead could summon, and then gun went flying again. Karasu twisted around and pinned Kurama to the floor, digging his fingers into the latter's shoulders. "Does this feel familiar, Suichi?" jeered Karasu while the transvestite yelled and struggled and smacked at him. He tried reaching over Kurama for the gun.

Kurama flung Karasu off of him. "I won't be intimidated!" he snapped, kicking the other gangster in the stomach. He wrenched around and groped for the gun.

Karasu lunged for Kurama; the redhead found the gun and whirled around, firing a bullet with passionate precision at Karasu. The latter had only time enough to widen his eyes in shock before the bullet entered his head. Brains spattered on the window behind him, which shattered as the body fell backwards through it to the street below.

Kurama stumbled backward, leaning unsteadily against the wall. He took deep breaths, amazed at how loud and fast his heart was beating. 'Good bye, Karasu,' he though, not the least bit sorry that the man he'd reluctantly shared his bed with these past years was now dead. Indeed, those last few minutes certainly had reminded him, as Karasu had suggested earlier, of that other time- when Karasu the newcomer had gotten him drunk off of vodka, and then threw him onto the bed and hit him and, to his bewilderment, quoted to him pieces of information about Suichi and Shiori Minamino, and Kuronue, while he ripped Kurama's skirt up over his rear and tore at his stockings...

'How did he know?' Kurama wondered again, though he knew he would never know the exact answer. It really didn't matter now, anyways.

He straightened up and looked over at Hiei. The billionaire lay on the floor by the bed, blood clotted on a torn pant leg and only half-conscious. Kurama limped over and laid Hiei out gingerly. He located the entry wound in Hiei's leg. "Talk to me, Hiei," he muttered.

"... Is he gone?" Hiei asked softly.

"Yes," answered Kurama. "He won't bug anyone anymore." He clawed at the fabric of Hiei's pants, tearing the area around his wound.

Hiei groaned. "He raped you?"

Kurama didn't like this question, but wanted to keep Hiei talking. "Yes," he admitted, quickly averting his gaze to the wound and away from the billionaire's face. "A long time ago."

"I'm sorry."

"It's okay," the transvestite said hastily. "It happens, especially when you live on the streets, I guess." He examined the wound with scrutiny. The bullet hadn't gone in too deep; rather it'd lodged itself into the crest of the bone. Kurama shuddered, recalling from his school days how the crest harbored a lot of nerves and knowing that Hiei must currently be in a lot of pain. 'You need to go to a hospital," he murmured.

The billionaire grinned weakly. "What, you can't operate on it yourself?" he joked.

"You're going to a hospital," Kurama said firmly. "You and Toguro both need to go to a hospital," he added, remembering now how Karasu had said he'd shot the giant in the foot, feeling guilty that he'd forgotten.

"And so do you," Hiei said. "You're sick."

"I'll be fine," Kurama retorted, contemplating how he was going to get Hiei and Toguro to a hospital.

"Kurama."

"Yes?"

"Don't run," he pleaded. "Don't disappear into the underworld or wherever after this, okay?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Don't run away; you shouldn't be afraid anymore."

Kurama blinked. "Of course I won't run away," he said after a moment. He felt bad saying this, for even as the words came out of his mouth he was studying Hiei's features closely, memorizing them, doubting he'd ever see Hiei again after leaving him at the hospital. He'd have to do the same to Toguro too, probably.

"Kurama," Hiei murmured, fearing that he knew what it was the transvestite was planning. "You helped me and those kids when you didn't have to. That has to amount to something."

"Your point?"

"I don't want you running way and winding up dying alone in an alley or something."

The redhead furrowed his brow. "I already told you I'm not going to run away-"

"Yes you are. You're going to run away, and you're going to ignore the fact that you're already sick, and then you'll die in the gutter like a dog. And you don't deserve that, got it?"

He pursed his lips. "You're exaggerating..."

"Listen to me. I could hire the best lawyers. I'll testify for you. We'll try for a light sentence for you."

"Uh-huh..."

"I'm serious," Hiei said. "It's possible. And when your sentence is up, I'll bring you to Makai Estates and you'll never have to set foot in downtown ever again if you don't want to." He gave Kurama a solemn look, trying to ignore the pain he was in. "Will you let me do that for you?"

He received a blank stare. "That could ruin your reputation," he said slowly.

"I don't care about that!" Hiei growled. "I care about you." He grabbed Kurama's wrist so tightly that the cross-dresser winced a little. "I love you- please let me fight for you."

Kurama tensed. Hiei's words sounded so honest and urgent that the redhead's paranoia was ebbing. He felt weird; an emotion came over him that he hadn't experienced in so long that it was almost foreign. This feeling, he kind of liked it.

"All right," he said softly. "I won't run away." He kissed Hiei on the forehead. "I promise."

Relief flooded the billionaire's face. "Good," he sighed. "I love you."

"Now you're just being redundant," Kurama murmured. "I love you too." He bit his lip and looked around. "Hiei," he began, "I'm going to move you onto the bed so you'll be more comfortable, and then I'll call an ambulance, okay?" He looked down only to discover that Hiei had lost consciousness. He smiled a little, and gently lifted him off of the floor and onto the bed.

Just as he laid Hiei onto the mess of sheets and blankets, he heard footsteps running up the stairs behind him. Kurama turned around in time to see a flash of blue, and to hear a roar in his ears. He uttered a sharp gasp as he felt a pain in his chest and stumbled backwards. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Hiei asleep on the bed, and then his vision faded to black as he hit the floor.