Raidersrule79- Thanks! And, I know I've been focusing on the "s word" a lot in the last few chapters, so I'm gonna tone it down a bit... Sad right?

Shadow12002- Thanks. Heh, it's kind of an old song anyway. I'm not really expecting anyone to know it -shrugs-

Jadedea- That's Robin for ya. One problem resolved (or is it..?) And another problem beginning! Thanks!

Emmery- Thanks!Force her!

Raven of the night 676- Thanks a bunch! That's me, a daredevil -rolls eyes- phff yea right.. Updating as we speak! Uh...type!

raven-rocks-the-dark - Thanks, I will!

Crazygirl956- Haha, thanks!

The-InFamous-Bounty-Hunter - Wow, thanks! OMG NO! Don't send them! -updates, updates, updates-

Mephisto2022- Thanks. Took the words right out of my mouth!

robinsfan- Thank you. Interestingly enough, I didn't get that song from Friends. It's one of my Dad's favorites. :)

theflamehat- Hah, nice try. You get half a cookie for effort! -gives theflamehat half a cookie with chocolate chips.

lil-cloudiekins- Thanks, I'll remember that! ;)

IYLUVER- And more you shall have!

Thanks for all of the reviews guys! Makes me smile! The song that Cy sang in the previous chapters was "Space Oddity". Betcha didn't see that coming!

So there isn't confusion, I do not own "Space Oddity" nor Friends NOR Teen Titans. Rub it in why don't ya!!!

Oh and no, I did NOT get this idea from 'Friends'. My cousin told me that it was just like an episode in the 6th season. Well, I never SAW the sixth season! Only 1, 7, 8, 9 and 10. So HAH! But I did see that Buffay the Vampire Layer one on TV. And that's it. Sorry for my rambling!

Onto our regularly scheduled program!

Putting The 'IN' Into Insanity

Chapter 8: Rock-a-Bye Baby...

"What'll it be guys?"

Beast Boy stood in front of his awaiting audience with two movie cases, " 'The Grudge' or 'Citizen Kane'?"

Robin put his arm around Starfire and rolled his eyes, " Really hard to decide..ESPECIALLY when you've seen 'The Grudge'...10...times.."

Cyborg darted his eyes from movie cover to movie cover, trying to decide what film to view, "Tell me about it!"

Robin's nerve throbbed on his forehead.

Raven flipped a page in her book, "Sorry, but I won't be joining you "wildcats" tonight. I'm going out with Zeek."

Everyone in the room groaned with complaints.

Cyborg sighed, "Oh come on Raven. You can do better than that! The guy wears tight pants and eyeliner!"

Starfire piped up, "I believe he is..um..Elmo?"

"Emo," Robin corrected.

Raven muttered under her breath, "Didn't say I was going out with Prince Charming..."

Beast Boy folded his arms stubbornly, forgetting all about the movies, " I, for one, forbid you to go out with him. He's creepy and weird and scares the living crap out of all of us! Am I right?"

The three other Titans nodded and agreed.

Raven glared at the changeling, "Last time I checked, you weren't my mother.."

Beast Boy glared right back, "Well check again sister, cause I am! You go out with him, I take away your thongs."

The den loomed in silence. The three other Titans in shock, Beast Boy waiting for Raven's answer and Raven too furious to speak.

After a good three minutes, Beast Boy laughed nervously and rubbed the back of his neck, "Heh.. You're gonna throw that book at me now, aren't you?"

Raven's knuckles turned white from clutching her book so tight. The half demon shook with anger.

"You think!?"

x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x

"Well how was I supposed to know that hardback books could leave such a huge boil on my head?!?"

Beast Boy rubbed his sore head that now was wrapped up in white bandages.

Cyborg tied together the last stray bandages, making a nice little bow on the top of BB's head, "But why did you do it man? You knew you were treading on dangerous waters!"

Beast Boy sighed, "Cause I don't want her to go out with that Zeek guy. He scares the living shit out of me!"

"Dude, he scares the living shit out of other Goths..."

Beast Boy got up and walked over to the TV screen, "So...Grudge or Kane?"

Cyborg smiled, "Kane baby! I heard it was one of the best movies ever!"

Beast Boy brightened up, "Full of action and blood and gore and curses???"

Cyborg beamed, "What else?"

The guys jammed the movie into the VCR and flicked out the lights.

'Dundadundaaaa dun DUN dun dun DUNNN'

A black and white picture showed up on screen with a man standing on one of those speech boxes. His fist was raised in the air and the words:

CITIZEN KANE!

Swirled onto the screen.

Beast Boy and Cyborg huddled together.

"This is gonna be the best movie ever!"

" Yeah! I can feel the action already!!"

5 minutes later...

"ZzzzZzzzz.."

x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x

Raven applied the last of her black eyeliner on before she heard a knock on her door.

The black bird sighed, "Come in if you must..."

Starfire bounded into Raven's room, "Oh Raven! I am glorified that you have acquired the joy and happiness of love! We must prepare for your "going out" experience by giving you a wonderful style of your hair and a brand new attire!"

"Star, I'm just going like th–Woah!"

Starfire grabbed Raven's wrist and pulled her into her own girly room. She sat Raven down on her big cushy bed and ran to her closet.

"No..no that will not do...Hmm...I know it's here somewhere..."

Raven looked around Starfire's room as the alien searched through her closet. Pink. And lots of it. Posters- actually..a better word is milk labels- were hammered into her light pink wall. Purple curtains hung on her window, yellow stick-on stars covered up most her walls. A pineapple stood on her dresser and– wait...

Raven squinted. A...pineapple?? What?

"I have found it!"

Starfire sprinted towards Raven with a child's smile. Before Raven could protest, she quickly stripped off Raven's cloak and leotard, not caring that Raven was now in thong and bra. And with super-speed, she threw on Raven's 'new attire'.

Starfire giggled gleefully as she dragged Raven toward her dresser's mirror.

Raven slowly opened one eye and looked into her reflection. Starfire smiled brightly. Within only a second Raven gave her an answer...

"No. Way."

Starfire's face dropped like a ton of bricks, "But-But..it is...you."

Raven sighed, annoyed, "Really Starfire. Let's look into the mirror together, shall we?"

Raven put an arm around Star's shoulders and turned back to her reflection. There she was. In a pink halter-top with white bell-bottoms.

Starfire looked in Raven's reflection, not seeing the mistakes that were there.

Raven pointed to her strewn cloak and leotard, "Black and blue...," She then pointed to herself, "Pink and white... Starfire?"

Starfire turned her head toward her friend.

"What is...wrong with this outfit?"

Starfire answered shyly, "It is..not your colors of choice?"

Raven nodded, "Good.. Now can I change into what I was going to wear?"

Starfire gasped sharply, horrified, "My friend! You simply cannot wear your normal clothing! We must to put a spin to your cycle!"

Raven stared at Starfire from her last comment, "Never...again..."

Starfire ignored Raven and went into her closet once more. Raven took the liberty of reluctantly sitting back on Star's bed.

Starfire came out once more and actually showed Raven the clothing first. A purple spaghetti-
strap top and dark blue bell-bottoms. Raven thought for a moment then shook her head.

Starfire sighed and pulled out a black long-sleeve top with the words, "Not My Day.." across the chest and a blue, denim mini-skirt.

Raven sighed, "Keep the shirt, throw out the skirt."

Starfire sighed this time, "But Raven, it is a set! They will be sad if not worn together!"

Raven folded her arms stubbornly, "I'll send them a 'Hang In There' card. Come on Starfire.. A skirt?? What am I? A bimbo??"

Starfire felt offended, "I wear one.. Raven, civilians will not think you are a .. Bim-bo..."

Raven shook her head, "NO SKIRTS!"

Starfire obeyed and sent the skirt back into her closet and kept the shirt out. Starfire came out once more and showed Raven the last article of clothing she had.

"It is blue and they are snug but..I am sorry Raven.. They have a rip on the knee.."

Raven brightened up a bit, "That's okay!" She ran over to the pants and ripped the other denim knee with her bare hands.

Starfire struggled to understand but set it aside. Raven was finally happy.

Heh...okay..

x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x0x

"No, Star. No way in hell."

"But Raven! I will just simply-"

" NO! You are NOT touching my hair!"

Starfire stood by her bathroom doorway with a pair of scissors, "Raven..you are so stubborn.." She edged closer to the Azarathian.

Raven backed up, "Star..don't you dare!"

Starfire lowered her head solemnly, "I am sorry Raven..to go to these measures.."

Starfire shot up her head and lunged for Raven, letting out a shrieking battle cry:

"AIYYEYEYEYEYEYEYEEEE!!!!"

"AHHH!!! NO NO!!!"

Snips of scissors echoed through the air and struggles pounded on the floor.

A gasp was heard, "Uh-oh.."

Raven quickly sat up from being pinned by Starfire, "What? WHAT?? Uh-oh??? WHAT DO YOU MEAN UH-OH??"

Starfire got up from the floor and backed up toward her mirror, "Raven, please...Do not lose your temper. It is..not that bad.."

Raven got up and zoomed over to the mirror, "Not THAT bad??!! Look at this Star! This-this is just...ARGH!"

Starfire meekly came beside Raven, who now had a piece of her hair sticking out from the side and uneven angles and not to mention a little bald spot in the back of her head.

"I can fix it! A pony-tail shall fix it!"

Starfire sat Raven down on her bed and began to pull and twist Raven's hair. After a thousand, "OW YOU MOTHER F-OW!", the pony-tail was complete.

Raven immediately ran to the mirror.

Starfie followed, "See? You look fine!"

Raven examined the new style with a face, "Star..the..the pineapple looks better than me!"

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Raven kept the style of her hair and the clothes after all. Her date would be there in 10 minutes. There was no time to change.

Raven sighed and continued down the long hall and entered the den.

The Azarathian gasped sharply and ran to get the others.

x0x0x0x0x

"Raven! What's the problem?!" Robin answered urgently as Raven burst into his room, huffing and puffing.

"Did Starfire put Ex-Lax in the meatloaf again?!?"

Raven gained her composure, to the den, quick!"

After getting Starfire, the three came to the door that led into the kitchen and den.

Raven stood in front of the door, blocking the others, "Now what I'm about to show you, may frighten and disturb you but–"

Robin interrupted, "Raven? Is Beast Boy hiding under your cloak again?"

Raven shook her head, frustrated and opened the wretched door.

"GASP!"

"GASP!"

Robin calmed down and quietly spoke, "Oh..my God.."

Starfire joined in, "The holy crap.."

Raven nodded, agreeing to their comments and went closer to the couch.

And there it was. Beast Boy and Cyborg were curled up on the sofa together. Cyborg on top of Beast Boy, both wearing dreamy smiles on their faces.

Robin smiled in victory, "YES! I finally found something to get back at them! Starfire! Get a camera!"

"But Robin, isn't that..mean?"

Robin began raised his voice, "JUST GET IT WOMAN!"

Starfire did and returned with it a few seconds later. Robin grabbed it savagely and started taking pictures by the dozen. Unfortunately, our messed up hero forgot to turn off the flash..

"Mmm..huh? What? AHH!"

Both napping teens jumped up quickly and straightened themselves up.

Robin smirked, "HAH! You guys have become the homos! Muahahaha!!"

"No man! NO! It's not what it looks like!"

Robin smiled, seeming to think back to old memories, "This does bring back some eventful times, doesn't it? Well, I'm sorry you had to learn the hard way but, what comes around goes around!"

Robin began to dance, "Oh snap! Oh yeah, uh-huh uh-huh!" He landed in front of the horrified nappers, "And that my friends is called, 'Bad KARMA!'"

Beast Boy waved his hands frantically, "NO! We are NOT homo! We just fell asleep is all! Come on! You KNOW that Citizen Kane is a flat out snooze-fest!" ((no offense to people who like Citizen Kane!))

Raven looked nervously to Robin, who seemed to be getting that crazy look in his eye. Not a good sign. She remembered what happened the last time he had that look...

FLASHBACK!

"Robin, I give you the honor of carving the turkey!"

Starfire handed Robin the knife and sat in her seat.

Robin looked at the knife and began his speech, "We have all worked hard and well this year. Fighting villains, stopping bank robberies and what not. Saving the city..being the heros that we are. Making lives count, almost stopping Slade.. ALMOST! What the hell!!? Why couldn't we stop him?? WHY! Is he the owner of us ALL??? Why Raven!? Why Starfire?! Why Beast Boy?! Why Cyborg!? WHYYYYYY!!!!"

The Titans all looked warily at each other.

Robin continued, salivating, " It's not the end! I WILL stop him! SO! Let this turkey be a symbol of Slade's BIG, FAT, STUPID HEAD! YAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!"

Robin brought down the knife savagely and began slicing and dicing the poor meat. He ripped and tore, seared and sheared. Maniac laughter filled his lungs and pierced the others ears.

Turkey flew in all directions, landing in the punch bowl and in the others hair. Beast Boy whispered to Raven, "Told you we should've gotten yams.."

"AYYYYYYIYAYAYAYAAAAAAAA!!!!"

Robin bellowed out a final cry and landed face first into the shredded turkey that was no more. He lay there still.

Silence filled the room.

Cyborg looked from the others, to the confetti-fyed turkey, to Robin's still form in the turkey's remains and raised his glass.

"And a Happy New Year!"

END OF FLASHBACK

Raven whispered to Starfire, "Lock the silverware drawers.."

The doorbell suddenly rang.

"I'll get it!" Raven quickly volunteered and raced to the front door.

She opened it to find Zeek. He was wearing tight black pants and a black tee-shirt that had a skull on it. Sure enough, black eyeliner was caked at the bottom of his brown (almost black) eyes.

"Hey."

Raven gave a relieved smile, "Hey.."

A crash sounded behind Raven. Zeek looked and quietly said, "Umm..Did I come at a bad time?"

Raven looked behind her and gasped.

Pots and pans were scattered on the floor, meatloaf chunks were flying and BB and Cy were hiding behind the sofa. Robin entered with the maniac look.

"BWAHAHAHAAA!!! I HAVE YOU NOW!!"

Raven turned quickly back to awaiting date, "Umm..no.. Robin is just angry that we don't have anymore toilet paper left. Happens all the time."

Zeek raised a black eyebrow, "All the time?"

Raven assured him, "All the time. Don't worry."

The two skedaddled out the door and walked toward the bay.

Back inside, Robin was...well...you can only imagine..

A/N: I had fun writing the flashback. Not as funny as some of my previous stuff, but w/e. Time to pick the next chappie!!

Daddy Dearest

Sound Clip: "No..no Daddy really..I'm not a pole stripper!" Beast Boy's voice came from the other room, "Hey Rae! You lookin' fine in that skimpy bunny outfit! You gonna bring me a carrot?" Raven turned back to her father on the phone, petrified...

"What the F—??" Moments with Cy

Sound Clip: Cyborg sat down in a black, leather recliner in a snazzy suit, "We all know that we, the Teen Titans, have such interesting adventures. So, here's a show where we can actually get paid to do stuff that we regularly do. And– STARFIRE! STOP! DON'T PRESS THAT BUTTON!!" Cyborg ran out of the room to the kitchen where an explosion occurred. He returned a few seconds later, covered in cake batter, "Anyway..."

What the F—?? Moments with Cy is actually funnier as it sounds. That goes for Daddy Dearest too. I don't want to give away the story, now do I? -wink wink-

Please review!