Unprankable

Disclaimer: I only own Lea, Justine, and Mona...

Jealousy
Turning saints into the sea
Swimming through sick lullabies
Choking on your alibis
But it's just the price I pay
Destiny is calling me
Open up my evil eyes
Cause I'm Mr. Brightside

Chapter Three: Jealousy

Lily hurried out of the Potions classroom, clutching her books to her chest and smiling brightly. Her classmates rushed by her, talking of the horrid lesson that they had just been relived of, but Lily could not make out their faces. The hallway was a blur, and the only thing that she could see clearly was a tall, dark figure that was standing by the vanishing cabinet, looking at her. Lily could see his eyes, dark as midnight, as they bored into her own. She felt transfixed, as if she was glued to the floor by the soles of her trainers. Luckily, the mysterious person began making his way towards her, which was fortunate, because she didn't think she could move if she
wanted to.

He put his hands on her shoulders, their eyes never breaking contact, and he moved in closer. Lily's breath was coming out in sharp, uneven pants, and her schoolbooks were slowly slipping out of her grasp. The boy leaned closer, his eyes half lidded, clearly having an intention of kissing her. Lily had no objection, but as she looked closer at the figure, she saw something...familiar.

That messy black hair, the piercing hazel eyes...

Lily awoke from her dream rather unpleasantly.

"AHHHH!" Lily shrieked, falling out of the bed, her hair blurring her vision. Her eyes widened at Lea's ecstatic face. "What the..?" she began. But before she could complete her sentence, Lea had yanked her off her feet and into a standing position.

"Get up! Get up!" cried Lea enthusiastically.

Lily rolled her eyes and fell back onto her bed. "I'm up, I'm up..." she moaned, grabbing a pillow and putting it over her ears, attempting to drown out Lea's laughter. "Why are you so happy about the fact that it's morning?" she grumbled. "It does happen every day."

"Well, Mona says she wants to talk to us... And that it's important!" answered Lea, twirling her hair happily.

"Maybe she's over Potter!" exclaimed Lily, throwing a pillow, with which she had vainly attempted to block out Lea's voice, onto Justine's bed. "And then everything can go back to normal!"

"Lily!" said Justine, glaring at her and holding up the pillow.

Lily shrugged. "Sorry!" she chirped.

"Guys? Can I come in?" said a voice from inside the bathroom.

"Mona!" Lea said, smiling.

"Yeah, sure," said Lily, eager to know what this 'surprise' was that Mona had wanted them to see.

"Alright!" said Mona, and they heard a giggle. Then, the doorknob turned and Mona stepped over the threshold that divided the bathroom and the bedroom.

Lily was sure that her jaw was touching the floor.

Mona had, yet again, had obviously been slaving over a hot curling iron for James again. She was wearing a black leather miniskirt and a delicate silver belt that dangled down to her mid-thigh. She put on a black, lace bra under a white corset, and had let the top of the bra show to make her look very much like a slut. Her nails were painted black to match her strappy stiletto shoes, which Lily had to admit were pretty cool. She had gone for the curly 'do' today, and had carefully fastened a black choker around her neck. She had carefully applied dark eyeliner and eye shadow, and many layers of mascara. Her face was positively glowing, with the pleasure of her completed outfit and the help of the many sparkles she had on her face.

"So do you like my outfit, you guys?" she squeaked, quickly turning as if she were on a runway.

"Um...its very...unusual..." said Justine, as Lily and Lea were unable to speak. "So," she said, her face contorted as if biting back a laugh. "What was the news you wanted to tell us?"

"Okay, here's the news," squealed Mona. She paused, as if waiting for them to plead with her to tell them. "I'm going out with James!" she finally said dramatically.

Silence.

Mona's smile began to fade. Finally, Lea broke the silence. "W-What?" she choked.

"You woke me up for that?" yelled Lily before collapsing back onto her bed.

"WHAT THE HELL?" bellowed Lea.

"Well, aren't you happy for me?" asked Mona, trying to look innocent.

"Mona... He's James Potter!" Lily informed her angrily.

"Yes, I've realized that," Mona said dryly. "What's wrong with you guys? Aren't you happy for me?"

"You already asked that. If we didn't answer, it means that NO, WE AREN'T HAPPY FOR YOU!" yelled Lea, who was becoming quite red in the face.

"Don't get so worked up Lea!" Justine said soothingly. "Now Mona," she continued, turning to her friend. "What Lea means is that we're sort of..."

"Scared?" Lily growled.

"Scared for what?" asked Mona aggressively.

"Your mental health, maybe?" Lea snarled.

"No!" exclaimed Lily. "I'm serious. I don't think he's any good- look at all the other girls he's dropped at the end of the week! I don't want you to be like them!" she added, her voice volume gradually dropping. "You'll end up getting hurt," she said quietly.

"I'm not like them! He loves me," she answered haughtily.

"Oh really? And when did he tell you that?" asked Lea, crossing her arms.

"Well, he didn't exactly say it but-"

"Aha!" interrupted Lea triumphantly. "So you're saying that-"

"SHUT UP!" shrieked Mona, stomping furiously on the ground like an angry bull. "YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND! IT'S NOT LIKE THAT AT ALL!"

"Well then what is it like?" asked Justine.

"I'm not going to get hurt!" Mona said exasperatedly.

"Look, you can go out with him," started Lily, glaring at Mona.

"Oh great, I have your permission! Now everything is fine!" Mona answered sarcastically, putting her hands on her hips.

"But at least don't turn into all those other whores he's been with," finished Lily smugly.

"What?" shrieked Mona, obviously very offended.

"Well, no offence but..." started Justine, trying to stay diplomatic. "Well... they wear the same kind of things as you do, and act the same way…"

"I JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" screamed Mona, her hands making fists at her sides. "NOW IF YOU'LL EXCUSE ME, I'M GOING TO GO FIND MY BOYFRIEND!"

Mona stomped out of the door and slammed it angrily. The wood made a pathetic cracking noise as she stomped down the stairs. 'Stupid Lily', Mona thought. 'And stupid Lea, and stupid STUPID Justine.' She was going to make sure that James Potter was crazy about her by the end of the week. And no one - not even Lily - was going to stop her.

"But I can't break up with her!" James whispered desperately to his friends. "If I do Lily will-"

But he didn't have time to finish. Sirius stuffed an entire pancake in James' mouth, stating loudly, "Hi Mona!"

"That was close," whispered Remus to Peter, and Peter nodded in agreement.

Mona crept up behind James and slithered her arms around his neck. "Hey babe," she said, kissing him lightly on the cheek and sitting herself on his lap.

James looked urgently at his friends, who were unfortunately no help. Peter was choking on his bacon, and Remus was slapping his back as hard as he could, his face contorted into a grimace. Sirius looked as if he was going to spit out his pumpkin juice, but settled for making a horrible face that looked as if he were going to vomit.

James suddenly heard a gagging noise behind him and turned around to see Lily pretending to choke herself, Lea laughing at her antics. Mona looked at James, and noticed right away how his eyes had lit up when he had caught sight of the red-head, who, even she had to admit looked gorgeous as usual. Sirius didn't notice, however, and was too busy staring at another member of the trio that had arrived.

"Well what are you waiting for?" asked Lea grumpily. "Move over."

"You're sitting with us?" squeaked Peter, his eyes as wide as the plates that held a few pounds of his breakfast.

"No, not with you. With Mona," answered Lily just as grouchily.

The three girls sat down, and squeezed between a pack of Gryffindor first years and the Marauders.

Lily sighed, grabbing a pancake and some toast. Justine picked at her food, avoiding any eye contact. Lea stared at her plate, lost in her own thoughts, not noticing a pair of eyes staring intently at her.

"Lovely," said Sirius brightly. "So how are you girls? Potions going well, I hope?" he added to Lea, who ignored him, as did Justine and Lily.

"So, James…" said Mona lazily, running a finger down his chest. "Are you busy this weekend?"

"Um.." said James, his thoughts not processing properly in his brain. "Weekend…"

"Great!" exclaimed Mona. "I thought we could go to Hogsmeade," she added, kissing him on his cheek once again, and ignoring the vomiting sounds coming from Lily and Lea.

"I…guess so," he answered half-heartedly.

"Great!" she exclaimed. She got up, turned him around, and kissed him passionately on the lips, moaning loudly and not noticing his arms flailing pathetically at his sides, his eyes wide open in panic. "Sorry, darling, have to go. I'll see you later," she added as she strolled away to talk to the 'James Potter fan club', all of who were anxious to learn the juicy (not) details of their love life.

Justine stood up. "Um…I just remembered…I left my History of Magic essay in the library," she said to Lily and Lea nervously.

"Ok, meet you in Potions then?" asked Lea, her eyes boring into Justine's, who quickly looked away and started fiddling with her fraying sleeves.

"Sure," she said, sounding relieved, and walked out of the Great Hall.

As soon as she had left the room, Remus stood up. "Got to go! Potions essay..." And with that he too walked out of the Great Hall.

Lily looked at Lea. "Why were they lying?" she whispered to her friend, a concerned look on her face.

"No idea," answered Lea truthfully. "We had better go…" she added, taking one last bite of bacon and getting up from the table.

Mona watched them leave, and once again, she saw James' eyes follow Lily out the door. She stomped out of the Great Hall, almost trembling with rage.

"It's totally obvious you like Evans," Sirius informed James.

James sighed. "What do you want me to do? Anyway, I have to go talk to her." he added, standing up and ignoring Peter's gasp of surprise.

"Oh really?" asked Sirius, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"History of Magic essay," said James, laughing at Sirius' antics.

"Well, it's a start," said Peter moodily, picking at his bacon.

"Shut up, you" said Sirius, chucking a bit of egg at his head.

James ran down the hallway, his hazel eyes searching for a glimpse of red. Up a bit farther, he saw her walking, her eyes to the floor and her hands in her pockets. She was clearly thinking about something.

"Hey, Evans?" said James cautiously, stuffing his own hands down the pockets of his robes.

His words seemed to bring Lily out of a revire; her head snapped up and she turned around, her eyes questioning.

"What, Potter?" she said, a bit wearily, as if his words weren't worth her time.

James raised an eyebrow, trying to act as if he wasn't shaking like a leaf on the inside at the prospect of talking to her. "History of Magic essay?"Lily swore. "I had forgotten about that. Um... How about the free period after Transfiguration?"

"Can't," he answered sheepishly. "I've got Quidditch practice."

Lily sighed exasperatedly at this and bit her lip.

"Well how about tonight, before dinner?" he asked.

"Fine," she answered. "Meet me in the empty classroom on the second floor at 5. And don't be late," she added sternly.

"Yes, mom" he said, grinning at her and walking in the opposite direction. His heart was soaring, and he felt like skipping down the hallway. She hadn't even insulted him. Yeah, it was a start all right!

"Good afternoon," he said, smiling down at a bunch of first years. Their eyes widened and they ran away, squealing in fright. This didn't affect James at all; on the contrary, he was strolling down the corridor, not noticing when Mona ran down towards him, her face livid.

"James Potter!" Mona screeched, glowering at her so called 'boyfriend'. "What the hell were you doing talking to her?"

"Talking" he answered vaguely, still smiling.

"James – " she began, suddenly noticing the broad grin on his face. "What are you smiling about?"

"Nothing," he answered innocently.

"Fine," she said angrily. "Fine. Don't tell me. But you still haven't answered my question!"

"Question?" said James, his head turning slightly to the side.

"WHY WERE YOU TALKING TO LILY!" she shouted, not caring that many passerby were staring at her.

"I was setting up a time for us to work on our History of Magic essays!" he snapped back, looking annoyed.

"James," she said, her lower lip quivering. "D-don't snap at m-me; I'm your g-girlfriend!"

"Sure," he said indistinguishably, walking right past her. "See you in Transfiguration."

As soon as he left, Mona kicked the wall violently, screeching curses at the wall and the unfortunate people who happened to be walking past her. 'It was so unfair!' she thought. 'Lily didn't do anything to make James like her; she didn't dress to impress, she didn't wear any makeup (besides mascara) and she didn't even bother looking at what she was putting on in the morning! And yet James Potter liked her.' A small tear was forming at the corner of Mona's eye, but Mona quickly brushed it away so it wouldn't ruin her makeup. Plus, crying in public was SO last year.

But suddenly Mona stopped crying.

An idea was forming in her head, and she was really liking the form it was taking.

Mona rubbed her hands together eagerly, her eyes glinting maliciously. She would make James Potter like her –

And make Lily Evans pay.

'Killing two birds with one stone,' Mona thought happily. 'And its not even ten o' clock!'

A/N: Review! (please?)