Chikai
Part Three
Lord, art thou at the table head above
Meat, medicine, sweetness, sparkling beauties, to
Enamor souls with flaming flakes of love,
And not my trencher, nor my cup o'erflow?
Ben't I a bidden guest? Oh! Sweat mine eye:
O'erflow with tears: Oh! Draw thy fountains dry.
The ReflectionEdward Taylor
Throb it went.
Throb, throb, throb.
Like a million thousand hearts pounding incessantly in his brain. The kind of pounding that screams Help me in big, black, bold letters, in jagged speech balloons in mangas, with the inevitable SFX in hiragana. . .They do come in handy. They just appear at your side, and poof! Instant Heart Sound Effect! Dokun, dokun! How happy. Oh what joy. Callooh, callay, Oh Caroll Lewis, oh sir. Damn. His mind
was wandering off again.
He does read books too, you know. He found it, relaxing, after a while. He thought it would work to forget, go to places, (as cliches offer when describing how reading books help, especially literature, to unravel the creative part of the biggest muscle we could never fill with enough knowledge and use it, even if we tried, in our body: the brain) and explore the imagination that kept dodging him when he tried to see. Well, it seems that a huge chunk of it, fell into the abyss as well. The abyss he too, fell into, as most people have these stupid abysses in their brains, and is that the way you spell the plural form of abyss? Mien Gott. He better stop thinking and talk. Poor Sei-Sei.
Well, Throb went his head.
That would be because he had been crying for, what, an hour or two? He thought it would help him, but that didn't work out well, did it now? Crying made his head throb a little bit harder, a little bit worse, and damn, he did forget about his hang over, but have mercy heavens, it came back to him and hit him when he started thinking about the girls, the bar, and he needs a drink now. A hard one. The kind that hits you good and makes you forget even your name and what you are and were.
Sigh.
Heartbreak and ire enveloped him like a nuclear bomb, trying to kill his immortal-ness, as if to tell him you're hopeless, die you bitch, die! And he was pretty sure he had told himself that, more than a million times already but he still couldn't die and be over and done with it, since, truth be told, he wasn't done and over it, much to his dismay.
"I'm stupid,"
Icy blue, steel cold as they may be, his eyes lost to the begging amethysts still pining for mercy's attention (Kannon, are you there?), all beauty and glory worn out by grief and total dejection. (He thinks.) The Kagetsukai let out a sigh himself, and pulled said Shinigami closer.
"You're not." He supplied his action, rubbing a comforting hand on Asato-kun's shoulder. Hmm, that didn't help much, he thought, sensing the poor inu shaking in his embrace again.
A sob. Oh Kami, he's crying gain, Tatsumi thought. Just when you thinnk he's stopped, he's at it again. Tears had a way of infuriating people, didn't they? He patted the mop of ebony on his left shoulder and he is gonna need a change of clothes after this, at the rate Tsuzuki's going.
"There, there," Actually, the talk he hoped for wasn't much of a success, as he recalls, since all he got out of the Shinigami was I'm stupid, and I'm hopeless. Tsuzuki had started falling to pieces long ago, and he was kind of frustrated that the empath, whom he depended on to keep Tsuzuki intact, sane, and in check, was of no help at all. He stands there and berates Tsuzuki, yes, but hell, they seem to be not talking to each other at all! If they could, especially Kurosaki-kun, they wouldn't look at each other nowadays. There was no reason he could see for them to be like that, and he wondered, ever so greatly, why.
He'll grow old if this went on.
"Tsuzuki-kun, please calm down. . .Tell me, why are you crying so much?"
A shake. A sigh. "Dammit Tsuzuki, tell me now!" Tatsumi lost his patience, and boy oh boy, did he lose it fast. Better cut donw on the caffeine, he reminded himself.
Wounded eyes stared at him as the shinigami drew away from his embrace. "You wuldn't understand." He said simply.
"No one will."
Tsuzuki ran.
"Daikirai. . ." Caramel eyelids closed and weary, he hwhispered as his dream progressed fromt he first stage of conciousness, to the second stage of fantasy bordering insanity. Dreams often showed desires of people, reveries and delusions one wishes conciously, or subconciously, with the help of imagination and insanity. Insanity because no one can defeat a thosand grown men in an arena with a lion, a few shikigami, a fucking tyrannosaurus rex, and an abyss suddenly appearing underneath his stockinged feet, and while wearing nothing but that and a long shirt, with heavy Emo-Goth make-up. (Think My Chemical Romance's Helena Video's corpse ballerina clad in a featehery black dress.)
The orbs kept moving underneath that encasement, and he looked so sweet with his mout shut, that Watari-chan was tempted to. . .you-know-what. But, he had someone else, so he better control himself. Bon was just so. . .so. . delectable. Like a chocolate moousse cake, chilled to perfection, topped with chocolate chips and syrup, with a bit of whipped cream and strawberry on a hot summer's day.
Heaven. . .
Fantasies behind, he carried the Empath through the halls, and right then and there, smack!
Alas!
He fell. They both did. The three of them sprawled on the floor, two groaning, one slumbering on, perturbed, maybe, but still dreaming, since it was rather exhausted from night time wanderings and musings of what could be, and what should be. Sleep left him and robbed him during the day.
"Gomenasai desu," The brunette started. "Watari. . .chan? Eh!" He stopped. He had gotten up, and was offering a hand, when sudden realisation dawned on him and dropped his head a kick, the one like Tifa's in FFVII's Advent Children. And another tow-by-two punc, a drag, a kick, another kick, and a slap, for added effect. (What a realisation.)
"Asato-kun. . .That hurt. A lot." Watari groaned. He was leaning on his elbow, and it felt like he broke something. He tried to get up, but he glanced at Hisoka first. Will someone get him? The poor kid.
"You. . .okay?"
"Yeah. My head broke my fall." He flipped his flaxen hair with his free hand and shot Tsuzuki a glare that the older shinigami was shocked to see, and my, Watari, are we in a bad mood today, it's kind of. . .Shocking.
"Sorry. . ."
"Won't you at least help instead of apologising your head off!"
He held a hand out for Watari, but he only gave 'Soka-chan a frown and a guilty look, and he started fidgeting at that.
"Won't you help him?" Watari said through gritted teeth. "I think I broke something."
Tsuzuki only nodded, and finally, thank god, he bent over and picked up the dear boy. "Here." He held him out to Watari. "I. . .need to go somewhere. Real important. Sorry."
Now, he was definitely apalled. Tsuzuki! The nerve! Why. . he oughta. . damn it all to hell. He could only reach out with his broken wrist and aching arm to carry Hisoka.
At that, Tsuzuki scampered.
"I told you he hates me." Hisoka said, opening his eyes.
"Bon!" Watari let him down. The Empath stood in front of him, straightening his clothes, and helping Watari walk towards his lab. "Maybe. . .Well, I'm too annoyed to defend him this time."
"I have no idea why, but he. . he loses himself off, I know, since he tends to be emotional, and it helps a lot, but when he looks at me now. . he. . " Hisoka trailed off.
"Don't say anything else. I need some pills." The two blonds walked, silent, confused in Hisoka's case, all the way to Watari's lab.
"Daikirai!" He yelled as well. He looked at the bare sky, with the sun blinding him and boring in his arms, burning him as he spread out his arms like a cross.
"I wish. . . I only wish. . ." He mumbled and broke down to tears again, as he let himself go.
Chijou.
The smells, the sounds, the sanity he could grab. . .He adored the living. He wished to feel like them. Not like this, where he had to transfer energy just to be seen. He felt useles, and he felt like nothing. He felt like he wasn't there at all. Well, he wouldn't be if he stopped. He had to exert so much effort, yet he felt like it was uselss in the end. He tried, but he failed. Over and over, and now, he's falling again.
"I do not want to feel this anymore!" He clawed at his chest and fell to his knees.
Take me.
Standing up, he spread his arms again. Closed eyes, tears rolling down his cheeks, heart bursting, burning, beating as thogh he was dying, he let go.
And down he goes.
to be continued. . .
Chikai
(Close)
by Aki Konoe
Plotmaster/s: Aki Konoe
Beta-master/s: Aki Konoe
Disclaimer/s: I own nothing. . . Not even my soul.
Translation/s: Daikirai---I hate you. (Correct me if i'm worng. Really)
Author's Note/s: No food, no nothing, just plain music. I mean, I normally survive without it anyways. Food. . .? Hah! Okay, I love food, but I can survice without it. Three days, man! Three days, no food, no water. . Maybe a sip or two . .and no sleep. (I'm nocturnal.) Nada.
It's not the Deftones or Switchfoot playing anymore. It's My chemical Romance (I love yu Gerard Way!) Fall Out Boy, and mostly Screamo (but i'm not emo, really.) like Funeral For a Friend, and there's a lot of Greenday. and it's been so long since I updated at all. I've been really busy. Oh come on, don't give me that look! I was busy flying all the way back to the Philippines, from California, going back to my old school, fighting depression, anxiety, applying for college and now i'm hyperventilating. Help.
Sigh.
I'm huggin my bear, and I'm back to Vertigo by U2. I have a new MP3 player. Mum bought it for me. It's red, see!
Well, about the story, it had no plot. And now, god, it has. Damn. It's hard to let go now. Don't expect much fluff. Nor must you expect that I would be as didligent as before on uploagin since i'm growing old and i'm getting tired. I wrote this freaking chapter during my English class, well, half of it, since we started a new semester today and had nothing to do. . (it's November 7, right? Thought so.) and boi, do I have a lot to tell you guys! But don't kill me if this kinda sucks. I'll write up the fourth real soon!
Again, the story. Ahem. This time, tsuzuki falls into his abyss once more. Notice why I repeated abyss? I'm practically giving this away! Go figure what he did in the end!
Again, I claim not to be sane.
Questions from the insane mind of Aki Konoe
1. Who loves My Chemical Romance?
2. Do you have a band?
3. What music do you guys listen to? ( I wanna get to know my readers more.)
4. Who wants to upload and do all the work of editing for me? (Coz I have no time.)
5. Do you want me to continue tormenting them?
6. Where do you live? (Don't worry, I'm not a stalker. I was just wondering.)
7. Have you figured out what he did in the end? (Get this right, you get s star sticker! Or a plushie. Or a sketch of anything you request. I am an artist, y;know. I do my own mangas.)
8. Will you read my manga if I get to publish it? Will you order a volume from moi? (Coz we'll only be putting it online.. until someone requests for the volume..)
So, REVIEW, or else, i'll die. You don't want that now, do you?