Slipping
Rodney was surrounded by his team, just him and the beds and the lumps of lifeless flesh.
"Eeny, meeny, miney, moe. Catch a Lantean by the toe, if he hollers, you're doing it right. Eeny, meeny, miney, might." He looked down at his hand. Finally, he could feed properly.
He approached Teyla and placed his hand over her heart. Nothing happened. He tried again. A shadow fell across her body instead. Rodney looked up at Sheppard.
"Well, that's different. Guess there is no light left in the house." Sheppard gave a rakish grin as he stood on the other side of Teyla. "But hey Killer have a go at the rest of us."
Illumination filled the area. The faces of those dead and gone appeared out of the shadows: Grodin, Gall, Markham and others that had lost their lives on the expedition. Then the Parcinese stepped forward followed by Ryals and Burns.
"Been there done those Sheppard," McKay retorted completely unimpressed. "Let's try someone new."
Rodney spun and planted his hand firmly on Major Lorne's chest. The major's chest crushed under the weight of his hand. He felt the heartbeat quicken then systematically slow. The experience was euphoric. The sheer power transferred to him from the life force held within the soldier was addictive. What he would not give for just a taste of Sheppard. The heartbeat ceased and Lorne withered to a dry husk. Rodney felt satiated.
"Oh Sheppard, he's yummy." McKay crooned. With a flourish, he removed his hand as the desiccated corpse crumbled to dust.
McKay took a bow directed at the deceased crowd.
"Bravo Killer!" Sheppard clapped and cheered loudly.
Outstanding.
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Waking with a start was becoming all too common. The shivering, disgust and anguish that lined up afterwards were constant acquaintances. He was losing. He was enjoying. He was withering. He was alone.
Four days alone. He would ask Beckett to visit with them. He would meet with Heightmeyer and be a good boy. He had to see them; he was strong enough now. He was coherent enough now. He missed them.
Being alone had never been a problem before. He had purposely been alone, self imposed isolation. It was easier that way. It was less complicated to remain detached and unattached. It worked before Atlantis. It was the way of a scientist.
And it was for this very reason he kept himself isolated, the pain of loss. He depended on them as they depended on him. He hated them for it. Even the worshipper of Cromm liked to fuck with him. He wanted the chance to antagonize the new guy back.
He rolled himself over and faced the screened off area. The silence was sharp. He wished they were on life support. It had a rhythm, a proof of life such as it was. And as it was now, they were static.
He expected them to be there always. Not rational, not even likely given their overall situation. He felt it none the less. And they were there, except they weren't which hurt even more.
A voice interrupted his misery.
"Rodney?"
He slowly rolled onto his back. "Radek."
An unsure and apologetic smile crossed Zelenka's face. "Is good to see you awake."
Maybe he was not as alone as he thought. He saw movement as Kusinagi peered around Zelenka. She gave a shy smile and waved. Rodney nodded back at her. That took a lot on both their parts.
"Have you had breakfast yet?" Zelenka looked expectantly at him. "If you haven't, we would like to eat with you."
McKay swallowed. He had not been expecting this. He needed to rebuild his wall. He could not let anyone else behind it.
"Let's see if I can pencil you in, seems my team is preoccupied right now." McKay called on every acerbic bone in his body. He sat a little straighter in the bed.
Zelenka squinted at him. "Aah, is sarcasm you're channeling. How original for you." Zelenka stepped up to the bed and pointed a finger at Rodney.
"Eat with us oh god amongst insects or don't. Either way I'm hungry and will eat here or in cafeteria. Must get food while you and your oversized teammate are not gorging yourselves. Right now there is enough food for rest of us."
"Gee Radek such a compassionate invitation, how could I not accept? Please go get your trays and join me when the dungeon master brings me my gruel." His wall precariously in place, Rodney smirked. He did not want to feel anymore.
"Excellent!" Radek whirled around and motioned Miko to the door. "We will be back."
Rodney watched them go. His wall faltered as he looked at the partitioned area. He needed to see them. He could wait no longer.
Rodney swung his legs over the side of the bed. A brace of sorts had been placed on his thigh as the little bots worked their magic. His leg informed his brain of the stupidity of walking. He ignored them both and kept going. He needed to see them.
No one came to stop him. Where was the medical staff anyway? Not important really. He stood at the screens and pushed through.
They looked pretty much like they had in his dream except with more color. Carson's team had their broken limbs immobilized. It was about all they could do. McKay was shaking from exertion and anger. He was useless. He could not help them. This was medical with a little scientific thrown in. The situation also held one more component he was not even remotely able to comprehend or accept. It was metaphysical. He was- dare he even say it- out of his league with that.
A commotion reached his ears. The medical staff was here and they noticed he was missing. He felt perversely content with the chaos he created. Control was slipping away as he stood before his team completely impotent.
Then self-preservation reared its head. "Glad it's you and not me." It left his mouth so quietly he almost missed it. Detach and remain unattached.
"Rodney?" A whispered question from behind him.
"They look like children. Well Conan and Sheppard have too much facial hair and testosterone. And Teyla…she looks nothing like a child really. Maybe my comparison is all wrong."
Radek stepped into the area and saw the team for the first time himself. They were eerily silent with eyes wide open. "They look innocent."
"That's it," agreed Rodney. "Ripe for the picking, except there is no light left in the house."
Radek turned to a nurse and mouthed for her to get Dr. Beckett and Dr. Heightmeyer.
"They are static Radek. I wish I could say the same. I'm slipping away without them." Rodney felt nervous, angry and then satisfied. Satisfied at what he did not know. Detach and remain unattached.
"Dr. Heightmeyer is on the way Rodney." Carson intruded.
"Hey Carson, come on in and join the party."
"Rodney you need to get off that leg." Carson grabbed his arm.
Rodney jerked his arm away. His jaw clenched so hard his teeth hurt."My dreams are escalating. I'm enjoying them while I'm having them. Before it was my fear of him and what he could do. Now it's me and what I could do. I do not know if I can keep them confined to my subconscious. He is gone but he left a shit sundae behind." A glint entered Rodney's eye and at the same time sorrow filled his face. "I'm just afraid of what the cherry is."
He heard another pair of shoes on the infirmary floor. With a slow and gimpy turn, he faced Heightmeyer.
"I conjure the dead and feast on the living." His eyes focused elsewhere. "We all fall down."
And he did.
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Mede made his way with a few other brothers through the streets of Mina. This was a reward for all his hard work with the Protectors and Facilitators. He had been secluded for so long the throng of people was a little unsettling at first.
Since the abbey was outside the city walls, the influx of refugees from other planets surprised him. His secondary task may not be as easy as he had hoped. His primary and official task would hopefully help him though.
The abbey's usual inquiries would have been at the labor office and just pulling people off the streets. With so many visitors the hostel would be a good place as well.
These visitors made it painfully obvious that his planet would be culled sooner than later. One did not need to be a mathematician or astronomer to figure this out. The Protectors readiness was more important and urgent than ever. However, if the leaders were willing to get volunteers by any means possible, they were morally in trouble. He was very disillusioned with his order and the High Abbot.
He did not ask how Col. Sheppard's team had been sacrificed but he knew from different snippets of conversation, it had not been pleasant. This saddened him and left a fire of righteous anger smolder within his heart. Whether they believed him or not, he would help them. The violation put upon them was a sacrilege.
Mede made inquiries. While the High Abbot did not know of the violation before it happened, he had not spoken out about it either. A few more inquiries, discreet of course, led him to the abbot that had actually performed the Sacrifice. When he returned to the abbey he would converse with the man. He was also the most knowledgeable about the vessels and the procedure. If there was a way to reverse or help in any way, he should know.
Mede bid farewell to his fellow brothers and made his way to the hostel. He stood in front of the public house. This was the right thing to do- now or never. He entered and approached the inn keeper.
"Hello Saum, any refugees have papers to work the fields?"
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