*Continuing in past tense*
Last time we left Neil M. Be... Neil M., he was strolling through his town, now armed with the not-so legendary Excalipur, and a freakin' hard piece of French bread. What will happen next?!!?!
Neil hummed a dainty little tune as he progressed. "Doo dee doo doo..."
"SHUT UP!!" screamed someone. "I'M TRYIN' TO SLEEP!!"
Neil sighed and kept going. "Y'know, maybe I should try sleeping, come to think of it. But I sure don't have a house... Aw, well. Us Belmonts... er... geez. My former family and myself require practically no sleep."
"Neil M.!" called a soft voice.
"Who's there?"
"It is I... ... Well, you don't know me. I am the wandering prophet, Sirius!"
"Never heard of you," Neil replied. "So who are you, anyway?"
"Um... I'm a wandering prophet, basically."
"That's nice. Seeya." Neil started walking away.
"Wait!! I have important matters to discuss with you!"
"Hm?" Neil pivoted around and now eyed this stranger, glowing in their white robe, their face unseen.
"It concerns the awakening evil..."
"Dracula? Been there, done that," said Neil. "Don't you read the Paranormal section in the paper?" He held up a newspaper, featuring the headline "Drac Got Whacked", with a picture of him posing with his (former) whip. "They didn't get my good side... anyway, problem's solved, man. Seeya." Neil again left, tucking his newspaper into his jacket.
"No, wait! You must hear my words! This is serious!!"
"Yeah, you already told me you're Sirius. Nice to meet you."
"No! The matter at hand is serious!!"
"Oh, so it's all about you, eh? I'm too busy to do you any favors right now, you selfish bastard."
Sirius held out his hand. A bolt of lightning zapped Neil, sending him to the ground.
"Now listen to me! Neil M. Belmont, you've made a grave misjudgement. You have slain Dracula... yet the fact is, that when he revives, the evil in the air which has been gathering and swelling for so long finally manifests itself across the landscape... the evil spirits and monsters begin to spread widely... vampirism runs amok... and the Castlevania appears somewhere in our land..."
Neil blinked a few times. "I... I thought the castle dissappeared when ol' Draccy kicked the bucket."
"Incorrect."
"Wha?"
"Incorrect."
"Not that."
"Then what?"
"What DOES happen, o great Sirius?"
"Nothing happens when Dracula dies."
"What?!"
"Nothing happens when Dracul-"
"Dammit, would you stop that?"
"Stop what?"
"Whenever I say what, you always repeat what you said!"
"I thought that's what you expected. I am rather softspoken."
"No!! I mean, 'what the heck did you just mean by what you said, because it didn't make sense to me.' "
"Well, I'll explain it better. When Dracula ceases to breathe, pump blood, think or act, this classifies him as dead. When Dracula is dead as opposed to being alive, nothing changes. There is no significant effect on the state of reality before or after this transition."
"...I hate you."
"What?"
"My feelings towards you are not those of any kind of endearment or affection, moreover I dislike your presence and tendencies and bear ill wishes of your future."
"..."
"Alright... I'll stop saying 'what'... Sirius? What makes Castlevania go away, if it isn't Dracula's death?"
Sirius cleared his throat. "The death or removal of the lord of the castle."
"Isn't that Dracula?"
"Dracula wasn't the lord of the castle, because he never set foot in it."
Neil twitched in frustration. "Then who the heck is?!"
"Not sure."
"But you're saying there is one?"
"There's always a lord of the castle... Castlevania has a strange, surreal effect on the world around it. It can foresee what will become of it in the near future, and can begin a manipulative process that will place a new lord by the time one is needed."
"So...."
"So basically, everything is the same as ever except Dracula isn't your target."
"Geez... I thought it was a good idea."
"You're an idiot."
"I hate you."
"Some Belmont you are..."
Terence Belmont's voice came roaring from the distance. "Get it through yer 'ead, mate!!!! The bloody dope is no Belmont!!!!! I dishoned 'im and left 'im fer the dingos!!!!"
"DAD!!!!" Neil hollared back. "You are NOT Australian!!!!"
"And YOU'RE not a Belmont!!!!"
"And you're BOTH gonna be sucking your sheep gristle through a hole in your throat when I'm done with you for waking me up!!!" screamed the angry man from earlier on. "Now SHUT UP!!"
"And I'm NOT A DOG!!!" added the shopkeeper.
"And if ya come back 'ere, I'll bite yer bloody neck!!!!" yelled the Australian vampire, still on his back like a turtle.
"Hey!!" called the sleeping man. "That'd be good of you, after I'm done beating their faces into dough!!!"
Neil's orange-y eyes flickered. "Would all of you JUST SHUT UP AND STOP TALKING TO EACH OTHER FROM ACROSS THE TOWN?!?! I'LL KICK ALL YOUR ASSES, I'M TOTALLY SERIOUS!!!"
"I'm Sirius. You're Neil."
"BUTT OUT, YOU!!!"
"No need to yell!! I'm right here."
"Sorry."
"Anyway, Neil... your destiny lies before you. I cannot help you any more than this right now..." Sirius handed Neil a heart container.
"Aww... Sirius... you shouldn't have!! Dad would never let me have this! Said I had to earn one."
"Look, don't get mushy on me. Mysterious, robed figures don't mesh well with mushiness."
"Hehe... mesh with mush."
"...Neil. Honestly. What the hell is wrong with you?"
"Mush..."
"Anyway. You can now use sub-weapons. Hone your skills, Neil! Learn the secret Belmont arts, or maybe make up your own or something. Whatever you do, go meander through nature and ancient structures until you locate Castlevania, for it only appears in the mist of night to the brave and adventurous."
"Tell me where it is."
"Er... no."
"C'mon, don't you know?"
"Not... really. I'm pretty brave, but I'm honestly not adventurous."
"Humm... sucks to be you, Sirius."
"Yeah, well... get going."
So... Neil began walking off on a dirt path, in the middle of the night. He seeks adventure, fame, wealth, and honor. But mostly just to make his dad look stupid, and to make himself look smart.
Are you excited yet? No? Sorry.
Stay tuned for more!!
Last time we left Neil M. Be... Neil M., he was strolling through his town, now armed with the not-so legendary Excalipur, and a freakin' hard piece of French bread. What will happen next?!!?!
Neil hummed a dainty little tune as he progressed. "Doo dee doo doo..."
"SHUT UP!!" screamed someone. "I'M TRYIN' TO SLEEP!!"
Neil sighed and kept going. "Y'know, maybe I should try sleeping, come to think of it. But I sure don't have a house... Aw, well. Us Belmonts... er... geez. My former family and myself require practically no sleep."
"Neil M.!" called a soft voice.
"Who's there?"
"It is I... ... Well, you don't know me. I am the wandering prophet, Sirius!"
"Never heard of you," Neil replied. "So who are you, anyway?"
"Um... I'm a wandering prophet, basically."
"That's nice. Seeya." Neil started walking away.
"Wait!! I have important matters to discuss with you!"
"Hm?" Neil pivoted around and now eyed this stranger, glowing in their white robe, their face unseen.
"It concerns the awakening evil..."
"Dracula? Been there, done that," said Neil. "Don't you read the Paranormal section in the paper?" He held up a newspaper, featuring the headline "Drac Got Whacked", with a picture of him posing with his (former) whip. "They didn't get my good side... anyway, problem's solved, man. Seeya." Neil again left, tucking his newspaper into his jacket.
"No, wait! You must hear my words! This is serious!!"
"Yeah, you already told me you're Sirius. Nice to meet you."
"No! The matter at hand is serious!!"
"Oh, so it's all about you, eh? I'm too busy to do you any favors right now, you selfish bastard."
Sirius held out his hand. A bolt of lightning zapped Neil, sending him to the ground.
"Now listen to me! Neil M. Belmont, you've made a grave misjudgement. You have slain Dracula... yet the fact is, that when he revives, the evil in the air which has been gathering and swelling for so long finally manifests itself across the landscape... the evil spirits and monsters begin to spread widely... vampirism runs amok... and the Castlevania appears somewhere in our land..."
Neil blinked a few times. "I... I thought the castle dissappeared when ol' Draccy kicked the bucket."
"Incorrect."
"Wha?"
"Incorrect."
"Not that."
"Then what?"
"What DOES happen, o great Sirius?"
"Nothing happens when Dracula dies."
"What?!"
"Nothing happens when Dracul-"
"Dammit, would you stop that?"
"Stop what?"
"Whenever I say what, you always repeat what you said!"
"I thought that's what you expected. I am rather softspoken."
"No!! I mean, 'what the heck did you just mean by what you said, because it didn't make sense to me.' "
"Well, I'll explain it better. When Dracula ceases to breathe, pump blood, think or act, this classifies him as dead. When Dracula is dead as opposed to being alive, nothing changes. There is no significant effect on the state of reality before or after this transition."
"...I hate you."
"What?"
"My feelings towards you are not those of any kind of endearment or affection, moreover I dislike your presence and tendencies and bear ill wishes of your future."
"..."
"Alright... I'll stop saying 'what'... Sirius? What makes Castlevania go away, if it isn't Dracula's death?"
Sirius cleared his throat. "The death or removal of the lord of the castle."
"Isn't that Dracula?"
"Dracula wasn't the lord of the castle, because he never set foot in it."
Neil twitched in frustration. "Then who the heck is?!"
"Not sure."
"But you're saying there is one?"
"There's always a lord of the castle... Castlevania has a strange, surreal effect on the world around it. It can foresee what will become of it in the near future, and can begin a manipulative process that will place a new lord by the time one is needed."
"So...."
"So basically, everything is the same as ever except Dracula isn't your target."
"Geez... I thought it was a good idea."
"You're an idiot."
"I hate you."
"Some Belmont you are..."
Terence Belmont's voice came roaring from the distance. "Get it through yer 'ead, mate!!!! The bloody dope is no Belmont!!!!! I dishoned 'im and left 'im fer the dingos!!!!"
"DAD!!!!" Neil hollared back. "You are NOT Australian!!!!"
"And YOU'RE not a Belmont!!!!"
"And you're BOTH gonna be sucking your sheep gristle through a hole in your throat when I'm done with you for waking me up!!!" screamed the angry man from earlier on. "Now SHUT UP!!"
"And I'm NOT A DOG!!!" added the shopkeeper.
"And if ya come back 'ere, I'll bite yer bloody neck!!!!" yelled the Australian vampire, still on his back like a turtle.
"Hey!!" called the sleeping man. "That'd be good of you, after I'm done beating their faces into dough!!!"
Neil's orange-y eyes flickered. "Would all of you JUST SHUT UP AND STOP TALKING TO EACH OTHER FROM ACROSS THE TOWN?!?! I'LL KICK ALL YOUR ASSES, I'M TOTALLY SERIOUS!!!"
"I'm Sirius. You're Neil."
"BUTT OUT, YOU!!!"
"No need to yell!! I'm right here."
"Sorry."
"Anyway, Neil... your destiny lies before you. I cannot help you any more than this right now..." Sirius handed Neil a heart container.
"Aww... Sirius... you shouldn't have!! Dad would never let me have this! Said I had to earn one."
"Look, don't get mushy on me. Mysterious, robed figures don't mesh well with mushiness."
"Hehe... mesh with mush."
"...Neil. Honestly. What the hell is wrong with you?"
"Mush..."
"Anyway. You can now use sub-weapons. Hone your skills, Neil! Learn the secret Belmont arts, or maybe make up your own or something. Whatever you do, go meander through nature and ancient structures until you locate Castlevania, for it only appears in the mist of night to the brave and adventurous."
"Tell me where it is."
"Er... no."
"C'mon, don't you know?"
"Not... really. I'm pretty brave, but I'm honestly not adventurous."
"Humm... sucks to be you, Sirius."
"Yeah, well... get going."
So... Neil began walking off on a dirt path, in the middle of the night. He seeks adventure, fame, wealth, and honor. But mostly just to make his dad look stupid, and to make himself look smart.
Are you excited yet? No? Sorry.
Stay tuned for more!!