Chapter 3
A Monster Inside
Dr. Crane had her agreement to cooperate, and that was all he needed. She was no longer a member of her family; as she went under, Jane realized that she now belonged to him.
He'd given her a mild sedative to ease her transition, as she'd been slightly shaken at the thought of giving complete control to a man she couldn't bring herself to trust. He'd removed the barrier of the table between them, moving his chair around to directly face hers. They sat, close as comrades, in the now darkened room. His briefcase had joined him, standing upright next to his chair. Jane did as she was told, and tried to relax.
"Alright, Jane. Just look at me, focus on my eyes. I'm going to count backwards from one hundred, and as I go, you will feel a great weariness wash over you. Do you understand?"
"Yes." The needle had stung; as the drug took effect, she tried, frantic inside, to hang on to that mild pain. It did no good; telling her to look into his crystalline eyes had been a death sentence, as far as Jane was concerned. There was no escaping them, those bottomless cold fires. At ninety-nine, she panicked as she felt life slip away from her. At ninety-one, she was lost.
Jane, can you hear me?
Yes.
Where are you?
I'm outside the restaurant. My shift is over.
Good, I want you to move forward in time, just a little, until you're on your way home. I want you to go to the park, at the corner of Huntington and 53rd. Are you there?
Yes.
Tell me what it's like.
It's dark, really dark. One of the streetlights on the path is burned out. It's right in the middle of the park, so the lights from the outside streets don't reach here.
Are you frightened?
No. I walk this way every day.
Okay, go on. Are you alone?
Yes, I always- wait, no. Someone else is coming down the path towards me.
Describe them.
I think it's a guy – yes, a guy. He's older than me, like thirty or forty. He's a bit tall, and big. Thick, muscular. His hair is really short. He's not that good looking…
Okay, Jane. Is he saying anything to you?
I-yeah, he wants a smoke. But I don't smoke. He doesn't believe me. He's getting pushy.
Good work, Jane. Keep going. Tell me what's happening.
I – hey -!…stop…
Jane?
I – I can't..
(pause)
Jane, are you being attacked right now?
(silence, as Jane labors to breathe)
Jane, I want you to step back, out of your body, until you can breathe again. Can you breathe now?
Yes.
Tell me what's happening.
He's on top of me on the ground. He has one hand around my throat, and I can't move, I can't get away. His other hand is pulling at my top…
Jane, are you frightened?
Yes! I can't get out…
Hang on to that. Don't push your fear away.
(Crane waits as her breathing quickens, and her whimpers turn to gasping screams)
Okay, Jane. Listen carefully. Are you listening?
I – yes.
The man who is choking you, he's trying to rape you, and he will surely kill you. You understand?
(she sobs)
This man, tell me who he is.
I – I don't know him –
Jane, yes, you do. You know who he is. You told me during our first session. Who is he?
He – I – I can't.
You can! Your fear will kill you if you can't say his name, won't it? If you cannot describe his face, he will kill you in your dreams, won't he?
No!
His face?
No…he has no face.
Jane?
His face is…crawling, churning, oh god
What is he?
He's a devil, a monster
What else?
No!
(Crane's voice changes, deepens, as he speaks over the air and into Jane's memory of that night)
Jane, what am I?
No
(a further changing of Crane's voice, a hurling of fire into the space between reality and memory)
…Jane…!
Scarecrow! …scarecrow…
(gasping on both parts, as the air settles between them; Crane's voice returns to it's former human tone)
Jane, I am going to count to five. When I reach five, you will awaken refreshed, and you will remember nothing of this session except for your terror at the image of and word 'scarecrow'.
One
Two
Three
Four
Five.
Jane opened her eyes. Her cheeks were wet, and her throat felt raw. She looked up at the doctor.
If she didn't know better, Jane may have thought she'd just been violated. The look on Dr. Crane's face was full of cruel gratification, with not an ounce of remorse. He appeared to be in the process of getting his breathing under control.
"Doctor?" she said hesitantly. He didn't look like he'd left his seat; that was a good sign. Can't mess with me from all the way over there. Can you?
In the blink of an eye, he had composed himself. It was as if a storm had swept through the two of them, but had miraculously touched nothing.
"Very good progress, Jane. We'll continue in this vein next time. Shall we?"
He rose, gesturing to the door. He was very nearly friendly; as Jane passed him, she noted a curious glow to his cheeks.
She definitely felt violated. She wished she could remember why.