Chapter 6

a Narrow line

The next morning confirmed the feeling of inescapable change. If Crane was her enemy, the time for confrontation was fast approaching.

"What are these?" Jane asked the nurse with the medication trolley, although she had known this was coming. She'd lain awake for hours, wondering how she was going to counter this move.

"New meds", the nurse answered. Not Maggie, unfortunately; in fact, Jane hadn't seen Maggie since her hypnotherapy treatment. She'd been the one to take her back to her room that evening; that had been the last time they'd spoken. "Doctor's orders."

Jane accepted the paper cup. "What are they for?"

A look of impatience flashed across the woman's face. Jane imagined she had better things to do than tell some seventeen-year old biter what she was putting into her body. "They're for your serotonin", she answered with a false sweetness. "Keep your mood up."

"Okay", she said. She tipped the cup back, spilling the little pills into her mouth. "When will they start working?"

"They should start immediately."

Jane swallowed obediently, allowing the nurse to look into her mouth and under her tongue. Satisfied, she wheeled away, leaving Jane relatively alone in the common room.

Immediately. That was not what Jane had wanted to hear. She wandered over to a window, and, with her back to the room, carefully sucked the pills out of the cavity at the back of her throat. At the time, she'd thought she was going to choke; if she'd tipped back any further when 'swallowing', they'd be coming out of her nose. She spat them into her palm, inspecting the tiny blue capsules. She didn't know what they were supposed to do, but she doubted it was anything as helpful as mood elevation. If she didn't make an educated guess soon…

"Jane", the doctor, making a very half-hearted effort to sound warm, greeted her unexpectedly. He glanced down as she quickly closed her palm; luckily his gaze didn't linger on her hands. "How are you feeling today?"

"Okay", she said; then, remembering the nurse's story, she added, "Good, actually."

He smiled, highlighting perfect cheekbones and full lips. If it had been genuine, Jane's heart would have quickened with something other than uneasiness. "Good, good. Can you come with me, please?"

"What for?"

He was almost jovial today. "Therapy", he said. "It's that time again. You're not busy, are you?"

Jane smiled, though that was a cruel shot to take at someone locked away in a mental institution. "No", she allowed. "I just didn't realize it was time again…"

"Ah, well. Come this way."

Jane followed him out of the common room, down a stark white corridor. She couldn't remember if this was the same room he'd used before; as he ushered her in, she appraised the drab green colour of the walls, and decided that she remembered something distinctly brighter than this. There was no table here, either; only two chairs, padded this time, faced each other next to a caged window.

"What are we doing today?" Jane asked, nervously gripping the little pills in her palm. She had the feeling that the clear capsules were dissolving in the heat; she hadn't had the chance to dispose of them yet.

"Well, we had such success with last week's session, I thought we'd continue to use hypnotherapy to unlock those fears of yours." Crane took a seat, again setting his trusty briefcase at his feet. He gestured for her to do the same.

Jane sat opposite him; she twisted and fiddled with the edge of her top, hoping he wouldn't notice that she hadn't opened her hand in the last five minutes.

"You look nervous", he observed, quite correctly. His dark voice, always somewhat dry, seemed almost sincerely concerned today. "How have you been sleeping?"

She shrugged. "Alright, I guess."

"I've noticed that you seem to be getting to bed much earlier lately; I do hope you haven't been very fatigued by the medication?"

Jane really didn't know what to say. She shrugged again, forcing herself to look into his azure eyes, trying to ignore the penetrating ice there. "What are my new pills for?" she asked quite suddenly, shocking even herself.

Dr. Crane seemed a bit taken aback as well. "They're to combat depression", he answered. "It's a common problem among many of the younger patients."

"But I haven't been depressed", she lied.

He smiled. "Perhaps you haven't noticed. Sometimes it's better to nip these things in the bud, so to speak."

She nodded weakly, realizing that the doctor would probably never answer a question directly.

Crane rubbed his hands together briskly; Jane told herself it was because the room was cold. "Shall we begin?"

Helpless again, Jane had to agree. She clutched her new pills; hopefully their absence would keep her in the real world, help her see what the doctor had planned.

"Okay, Jane", the doctor said. There was something in his sharp eyes, a gleam that may belie excitement. "We'll start off the same as last time; just focus on me, listen to my voice…"

Jane, she begged herself frantically, stay inside yourself

Don't lose your head

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Hey, folks! Thanks for all the reviews, I'm glad you're liking the story so far! Please, keep up the critiques, I appreciate it so much! Anything that helps me write better is welcome. I do love to edit. And, anabrupt end to a chapter, I know. Stay tuned!

-nH