Title: Hide and Seek

Author: postitnotes

Disclaimer: I do not own Firefly.

"I see you there, Jayne!"

Jayne didn't look up. He was furiously polishing the knife he held despite it already shining.

"You're not following the rules, Jayne. You're supposed to find me."

"I'd rather not," Jayne muttered.

River sat down beside him and leaned as close as she could without touching him. "But that's how the game goes. I have to hide."

"Fine. You hide. I'm sure you know some place that I wouldn't look, and then you'd be the winner." Jayne dropped the knife on the table.

"Do you want me to leave?" River asked softly, her body eerily still.

"Yes, I do. I want you to go away. I don't want to deal with a gorram crazy girl in my bunk."

Despite the harshness in Jayne's voice River threw back her head and laughed. "You're the only reason I'm here. I go where you go."

"And that's exactly what I don't like."

"I think I'm going to have a broken heart." River paused a moment and then giggled. "See?" she said, pointing to the left side of her chest, ignoring the blood that suddenly began to flow there. "Broken heart."

Jayne's face contorted in pain as he quickly averted his eyes. "Go away," he pleaded, the words breaking slightly.

River approached the table and let her fingers trail around the edges of the knife. "It doesn't matter. I'm not really here, so I can't leave."

"Jayne!"

Jayne whirled around. "Yes, cap'n?"

"Is there someone else in here?"

"No, sir."

"I though I heard voices."

River sighed and stood in front of Mal. "He thinks he's crazy," she said matter-of-factly as she gestured to Jayne. "He knows I shouldn't be here but he doesn't know how to fix it. But he's not crazy. He's just human."

Jayne cleared his throat. "There's no one here, sir."

"Right," Mal responded, skepticism evident in his voice. "The service is going to start soon."

Jayne nodded. "I'll be there."

Mal left and Jayne continued to stare at the empty space where he'd been. After a minute of silence he hopefully turned his head only to see River crouched next to him. "I'm goin' to the memorial service. You'll be there no matter what, I s'pose."

River shook her head. "Silly Jayne. Mourning won't bring back the dead. It just reminds you to miss us."

"When will you leave?" he asked, his voice husky.

River tilted her head to the right. "You think that if I leave you'll be able to let go." She reached up and placed her hands on the sides of Jayne's face. "But you don't understand. The reason I'm here is that you won't let go. You don't want to let go because you don't see how you can be happy again."

River pulled her hands away and stood up. "Don't worry. I'll stay here until you're ready for me to move on. I know everything will be okay, but you need to understand that too."

Jayne remained silent as he wiped away the tears that refused to fall and stumbled to his feet. As he unsteadily left his bunk he could feel River with him, ever-patient and ready, and a tiny voice echoed in his head.

"You're not following the rules, Jayne. You have to let me hide."