Mind games
Severus Snape was never one to relax… even when deep in dreams, his shoulders were tense and his muscles taut. Frantic movement was occurring behind those delicate, heavily-lashed, deep-sets eyes. He was dreaming… of what? She huddled closer to his chest, enjoying the warmth of his body so close to hers and the feel of his slackened arms draped around her waist.
His breathing was silent even in the dead of night… not even a moan escaped those thin, colourless lips, yet he did toss and turn every now and then.
She felt strangely calm, something she had not expected to feel… after all, she had never expected to find herself in a situation like this with anyone, let alone Snape.
Like he said… there was no turning back. She didn't want to… but she could not believe how their emotions had escalated toward what had happened in the last hour or so… she glanced out of the bare window at the dark sky, the shimmering moon and silvery clouds… so peaceful.
She fidgeted, pushing herself up and drawing her knees up to her chest.
She could not sleep, her mind craved rest but she needed time to think, to enjoy this moment to the fullest. She needed to understand, how could it have been him?
Ok, so yes Severus - she refused to call him Snape - had been her teacher for 6 years… And he had done so many terrible things… oh yes… unbearable things… but he had protected her… that was true.
'Well, this is new' she jumped, unaware that he had woken, to the sensation of his hand stroking her arm.
'Your not kidding' she retorted, pulling away shyly from his touch 'So… erm… what happens now?'
He sighed 'I'm not sure…'
'Severus' his eyes widened slightly at the sound of her using his first name 'you taught Harry Occlumency. Or tried to…' he raised an eyebrow, but let her continue 'Maybe you could try teaching me… it might come in useful'
'A small factor in the game you are now playing yes… I suppose it could do no harm. Do you understand what is involved now… Hermione… you are expected to do as the Dark Lord tells you, do you have any idea-
'Spare me the lecture, I don't need to hear it, not right now' he complied, pursing his lips and shifting onto his side.
'I will do what is necessary to protect Harry and the Order…'
'You should have thought about who will protect you Hermione…'
'I made my choice…' she retorted, her voice deepening, an edge to it he would never have guessed could be there. 'And I thought, given the circumstances… you would be protecting me' her eyes burned into his, so accusingly… that he almost smiled.
'I intend to… if you let me'
'Good, because I think my feelings for you are deeper than I thought… and I want to know what you think of me'
'You want me to tell you I love you'
'No… not exactly. I just want to know that what happened wasn't just a spur of the moment thing-'
'-It wasn't' he interjected -
'-Good. Severus… this wasn't easy…'
'I know… your still shaking' she did not return his smile, only drew her knees closer to her chest.
'You wanted to know how I felt… If I told you I loved you I would be lying. Love is something that happens over time… But I do care about you…'
With that, he pushed himself up and slipped an arm around her waist, waiting for her to relax against him…
He could not prevent the smile on his lips as he whispered in her ear, in as delicate a voice as he could manage 'Hermione… your still shaking'
'Ok… here, it won't work as well as yours but… if this goes well - you won't need it' he handed her a dark-stained mahogany wand. She didn't think to ask whose it had been… suddenly feeling apprehensive about using magic after so much time without it.
'Relax… I trust you understand how this works'
'Yes… I read about it'
'Surprise, surprise' she was starting to get used to his quirky sarcasm.
'Ok, Legilimens'
Hit by an invisible force, Hermione had no time to think about how to react…
A crayon picture, a big red square for a house and small stick men in front of it, dripping blearily as she held it up for the teachers' inspection. From an early age she was learning how to hold her head high and ignore her malicious classmates and their idea of a joke.
Hiding in her room as her parents argued outside, she buried her head in the soft pink cushion, rocking slowly back and forth and hoping against hope the shouting would stop…
Opening her Hogwarts letter… the look on her mothers' face as she read it was one of mingling surprise and contempt.
The look on her fathers' was one of disgust…
She jerked upwards, blinking back the clouding disorientation, only to find him standing over her with a slightly bemused expression.
'Ouch… did… did you see what I saw?' she asked, wincing slightly.
'Yes…'
'Well, I didn't exactly want you to see those memories'
'It's understandable'
' I miss them. My parents I mean'
Severus was momentarily lost for words, unable to think of any consolation he had any right to give. Knowing what she was going to ask…
'Severus… who… who did it?'
'-You don't want to know-'
'But I must. Please, tell me'
He could not meet her gaze, finally giving in and muttering 'Bellatrix', more toward the floor than to her face.
'Oh…' her glassy eyes had lost their gleam, or maybe it was just the light 'I should have known'.
She took a deep, steadying breath, closing her eyes and grimacing 'It's like lead…' she blurted out ' -like lead running through my veins every time I think of them. It… sometimes I don't even believe it… like this is all some horrible nightmare and soon I'll wake up'
'I'm afraid Occlumency tends to have that affect. We can stop if you would like'
'No…' she rubbed her eyes and gritted her teeth, steeling herself determinedly. 'Lets carry on'
'Are you sure?'
She raised herself up and resumed her position across from him, straightened her shoulders 'Just do it'
Ok, let me see… erm… first of all I never expected so many reviews… you may have noticed my other stories tended to lack any such enthusiasm but I guess this one is a bit more… well actually I'm not even sure…
Anyway, there is more plot to come so bear with me…
XxPeridoxX