Ah, there you are. I've been waiting for you. It's time for the story to keep going, so sit back and enjoy. This chapter will be just Raven, so sorry to all you Beast Boy fans out there! He's not in this chapter at ALL! Don't hurt me! I don't own Teen Titans…

Beast Boy's Game

Part 8: Thoughts of You

Raven looked and felt paler than she usually did that morning. She'd slept for perhaps four hours, and has spent most of the morning trying to keep her breakfast down. The absence of her hush-hush romantic interest was making her physically ill. She hadn't been able to meditate, either. Groaning softly, Raven made her way over to her mirror. It was time to visit Nevermore. Picking it up, she supported it from behind and by the handle. Trying not to be sick as the room kept tilting back and forth in her eyes, she sat on her bed. Had she bounced more than once, she would've been sick. Looking carefully into the mirror, she murmured her three famous words. "Azarath… Metrion… Zinthos." Twin tendrils of black magic wrapped gently around her, and she was enveloped in dark magic. The mirror floated for a few moments as she was carried inside, then fell to the soft bedspread.

Raven came upon a chaotic scene in Nevermore, the representation of her mind. The sky looked cracked, as though it were made of glass. Trees were burning. The ravens that usually told others to turn back were gone. It was cold and dark… "Hey…" Raven turned when she heard her own name. It was one of her emotions, Happy. "Glad you stopped by, I guess…" Her pink cloak was in tatters, and she was translucent like a ghost! Her face, for the first time in her existence, wore a frown.

"Happy?" Raven barely recognized her. When she reached for the mirror-copy of herself clad in pink, she faded a little more.

"Don't!" Happy yelped, drawing away. "You can't touch me… I might disappear forever." Her words and tone contradicted her very meaning of existence. Happy… wasn't happy. "Go see the others, maybe you can help them instead…" she moaned softly, holding her abdomen. "I can't stick around… I'm too weak…" she hovered away, leaving Raven alone.

Raven heaved a troubled sigh, continuing along the path. She was in the main portion of her mind, having not entered any particular emotion's realm. It was starry, and the path was of dark stone. Knarled trees were here and there, and she put out the fires as she went. A tiny bit of stress was relieved every time she did so, but there was no way that she could put them all out anytime soon. Seeing to the ones that were in her way, Raven continued along the path at a slow pace. Shooting stars, meant to be symbols of creativity or unparalleled thought, were scarce. She knew she hadn't been reading or thinking creatively much lately, so it was no surprise. The whole scene was bleak and dead.

Raven reached a crossroads, finding a sign that pointed to where each of her emotions lay. They only gathered when she willed them to… or whenever two of them happened to mix. Such as love and affection, she thought with a blush… She read down the incredibly long list, for the sign was random and quite large… and found the one she wanted. "Wisdom…" Raven mumbled, starting down the right path. "Maybe she'll have the answers…" She continued down the path, and before long the landscape started changing before her very eyes.

The starry sky became a ceiling. The dark, rocky ground became smooth marble. The trees were seem replaced by bookshelves. Raven had arrived in her own memory library. "I wasn't sure you'd come." Another emotion peeked out from behind one of the bookshelves. But, it wasn't the one Raven was expecting.

"Timid, is that you?" Raven said, coming closer. Timid shrank away, her dusty gray cloak fluttering. She looked at Raven with hurt, confused eyes. That was how she always looked, but still… "It's okay…" she came close and bent, since Timid was much shorter than the other emotions. Small in stature and in confidence, she was the easiest emotion to scare or hurt. Raven had to be careful not to startle her. "Where is Wisdom? Have you seen her?"

"Mmm…" she said, peeking out from behind the shelf again. "You won't like what you see…" she whispered. "She's been in the memory storage of Beast Boy with Love and Sadness for a long time now." Raven thanked her, and she shrank away into shadow.

Heaving another sigh, Raven levitated amongst the endless books that were her memories. Each one represented a moment in time, a memory, an incident in her past, a thought… so many that no one could ever count them all. But, Raven knew where she was going. Every individual in her immediate life, namely the Titans, had a special vault where things in her mind involving them were kept. There was one for Robin, one for Starfire, Cyborg, and of course– "Beast Boy's vault…" Raven whispered, finding it wide open. She peered inside and found three copies of herself huddled there.

The shelves were messed up, books strewn everywhere. Torn out pages and candlelight were in the room. A set of three girls were huddled together, looking into the same book. One was clad in a soft red. She was the representation of Raven's emotion love. One was in a hazy light blue, looking very depressed. Her cheeks were wet and her hood was back like she'd been crying. That must've been 'sadness.' Wisdom, on the other hand, was sitting in the middle with the book in her lap. There was a little glow coming from it, and it was playing memories of Beast Boy on a little magic screen. Beast Boy grinning at her. Beast Boy making tofu. Beast Boy scratching the back of his head in embarrassment. "How long have you three been here?" Raven asked, coming close.

"Too long." They said in unison. So… Love, Sadness, and Wisdom had bonded for the moment. They would speak all at the same time, and copy each other exactly. "Longer than we thought."

"What's making us sick?" Raven asked her question right off the bat.

"Beast Boy's absence is making us sick." They said in one voice again. It was a mix of all three of them, and they were all her, but it was still creepy. "Heartache is bad for all of us. Timid and Sadness are strong now, but it is still not healthy."

"I saw ha… what was left of Happy out in the main area." Raven said.

"She takes it the worst of all. She won't come in here. The memories make her more upset, and she weakens even further." The three emotions looked up from the book at last, and Wisdom closed it. They stood as one, as did Raven.

"That's understandable." Raven mumbled. "Nevermore is in a disarray. We have to fix this or my powers…" she let her sentence hang, and the three of them stared at her.

"He must return, or it will be too much for all of us." They said in unison.

"What will?"

"The heartache." They said. "Control will be beyond us all, and we'll die." Raven knew perfectly well what that meant. If she had no emotions at all, not even surpressed ones… she' have to be dead. "Supressing depression is not healthy." They went on. "Find an outlet to quell the stress."

"Like?" Raven wanted to know.

"Let her out." They were referring to another emotion that was rarely seen.

"Never." Raven snapped, sweeping from the vault and out of sight. "I'll never give her control." She was gone from the library, and found herself at a cage. There was an endless, abyssal plain before her. The starry sky was back, and the ground was featureless… save the sage of course. It had all sorts of padlocks, chains, twisted wires, and other locking mechanisms on it. A magic circle was drawn around it, a wreath of fire up in the sky. It was ready to drop and act as a secondary barrier at a moments notice.

"Come to tease me?" said the blood-red clad girl. She looked like Raven, but she had four glowing red eyes. She was in heavy chains, which allowed her little movement. It was one of Raven's most powerful emotions… Rage. "Get lost, before I cut your pretty little neck." She spat on Raven's shoes but she didn't get a reaction.

"Hello Rage. Feeling active lately?" Raven said softly, as not to make her more worthy of her namesake. She was chained up, locked up and kept in there for a reason, after all. She was one of Raven's rarely seen, but by far one of the most powerful, emotions. Rage hissed at her in an attempt to scare her off, but she gave no reaction to that either. "The others told me that you're especially restless lately."

"That thing has him!" Rage roared and thrashed hard, making Raven take a step back. The chains groaned loudly, barely holding her at bay. "He belongs to us! He's ours!" She spoke of Beast Boy like he was an object, but not as an enemy. That was actually an improvement, considering she'd wanted to kill him so badly months before they'd become an 'item.' Now, she'd accepted him as a potential mate. But… that didn't make her any less possessive. Rage often paired with Jealousy when Raven had caught girls checking out Beast Boy in the past year… but she'd held them at bay with her willpower. "I can't sit here and let that thing eat him! If anyone's gonna kill him its gonna be us! And that's when he screws up really bad!" Raven knew Rage was always waiting to kill something, but had a small hold against doing that to Beast Boy. Affection, another rather elusive emotion, had spread a small influence into Rage a few months ago.

'Don't kill Beast Boy.'

It was only one thing, but it was worth it. "He belongs here! With us…!" Rage sagged very suddenly, and tears sprouted from all four of her eyes. Raven looked on in shock as Rage's cloak flickered from blood red to a hazy light blue. It was straight back to normal, but the angry tears kept coming. "He belongs… to us…" Rage rocked slowly back and forth, and Raven couldn't help but feel sorry for her. "Our Beast Boy… ours…" she whispered almost deliriously. "Ours…"

Raven frowned sadly, leaving the bound and chained emotion alone. Sighing with fatigue and distress, Raven had one more stop to make before she left. Rubbing her temples, she made her way to the main chapel. The chapel of her mind.

It was basically a church ruin, and she frowned slightly as she reached it. There was only one stained-glass window still intact, as usual, but the place looked old and dusty now. That wasn't normal. Raven pushed both of the still-standing double doors open, walking straight forward. Pulling her hood back, she marched straight up to the dais and stood behind the podium. "Attention… everyone." She said softly. There was a massive swirl of magic and the swishing of cloaks. "I call this meeting of my emotions to order." She said. There was instant silence, and everyone looked straight ahead at her.

They had all come, and sat as one on the many pews that were set up for just such meetings. Raven had called all of her emotions to one place in her mind. Sadness. Jealousy. Wisdom. Love. Lust. Humor. Affection. Mischief. Timid. Confidence. Rage (still in her cage). Even Happy sat, trembling, on one of the pews. They were scattered and quite a few lesser emotions were present as well. But they usually fell under one of the main categories, so they didn't independently talk much.

Raven looked out across the crowd of girls that looked just like her. Was everyone there… yes. "You all know why I'm here. Beast Boy is gone, and there's nothing we can do about it at this point. This is tearing us up inside, and its making me physically ill." There were fleeting looks of concern in the crowd, and some whispering. "We must keep this under control for our own survival. The stress is mounting, and it will kill us if we don't let out somehow." Raven said, staring at them all. The rainbow of cloaks shifted again for more whispering and talking amongst themselves. "As of now, I'm open to suggestions."

"Play a prank!" shouted Mischief. "Robin needs to be pulled down a few pegs!" Confidence seconded that vote with a shout and a fist in the air.

"A good cry could help…" said Sadness. Timid, who was sitting next to her, nodded in agreement.

"Blow shit up!" roared Rage. Lust, who was nearby, agreed with that. Lust and Rage got along for some reason, though Raven could never figure out why.

"Hug somebody to feel better! Starfire gives good hugs!" Affection cried. All the other emotions winced at that comment. "What? What'd I say? Its true!" There was a rolling of many eyes, and the meeting went on.

Many, many suggestions were given, but all of them in the interest of the emotion that gave them. Happy remained fairly silent, and Raven watched her out of the corner of her eye. If any of those appealed to Happy, she'd try that one. But, nothing seemed to sway her opinion. So, Raven forced her hand, "Happy. What do you think we should do?" she asked.

All eyes turned to Happy. She was still pale, and her cloak torn and ragged. She looked up at Raven, licking her dry lips. "We should…… we should eat something and keep our strength up. Beast Boy could come back with the darkness, like we did." There was a lot of murmuring in the crowd, and the emotion called Knowledge stood up.

"I agree." Said Knowledge. "If Beast Boy comes back still fighting that thing, we've gotta be ready. All the emotions turned to look at her this time. The rather quiet emotion went pink in the cheeks, not used to all the attention. She was one of the quieter emotions, but right now she was the center of all thought."I propose we eat a good meal, and start setting traps. When the darkness returns to Titans Tower in this world, it'll be bombarded with spells and immobilized. That'll give us enough time to –!"

"Blowit the hellup!" Rage put in, rattling her cage angrily. "I second her plan as long as we kill that mother-fucking shadow thing!" She looked ready for action, though the chains held her back by a thread. "As soon as it gets here we'll kill it once and for all!" All of Raven's emotions looked at eachother, clustering together for gossip and other opinions.

"Order... order!" Raven actually had to shout. Instantly, everyone rushed back to their seats. "It seems Happy has our health issues in mind, so I'll go with that first. And then, Knowledge and Rage's plan seems to be good to." There was a long silence, and Raven tilted her head down until her eyes were looking at them all from under her eyebrows. "After we eat a hardy meal… we set magic traps." A ghoulish, confident sort of grin came across Raven's face, and lightning split the sky of Nevermore. "That shadow-thing will be sorry it ever came near Beast Boy."

"YES." Every single emotion agreed in unison, and Raven's cloak flickered white for a moment. It only happened when all of her emotions agreed on something… and that was rare. "DESTROY THE SHADOW. GET BEAST BOY BACK."

"Meeting adjurned." Raven said, putting both arms into the air. "I'll see you all again soon." She was lifted into the air from her own powers, and vanished from Nevermore. The emotions scattered to their own areas, and the Nevermore chapel was silent once again.

Yes, yes I know. Beast Boy wasn't even in that chapter, and the fic is supposed to star him! Well, I wanted you guys to get a good grasp on what's happening to Raven too, y'know. But... Think about it this way. The historical records in the future said Raven blew up Titans Tower with her powers. Was that because of the traps she set? Whooooooo… I guess we'll have to find out later. We're going back to Beast Boy in the next chapter. Next time on Beast Boy's Game! Its "Return to the Past!" 'Code: Lyoko' lovers don't kill me! See you soon!