Once again the boys went in a direction I wasn't expecting. Unfortunately it wasn't in their usual goofy direction. This one probably qualifies for a "Warning - likely to want to throw things at monitor" label.
Van Helsing awoke to the sun shining and the sound of birds. It was an absolutely beautiful day and for once, he was in perfect accord with it. He looked at the man who lay asleep next to him and couldn't prevent a smile from coming to his lips. Carl looked utterly adorable asleep. He had snuggled into the blankets so that all that could be seen was red-gold hair sticking up in spikes that would do a porcupine proud. Van Helsing had an overwhelming desire to run his fingers through it and smooth it down.
He couldn't remember the last time he had felt so good in the morning. Even the aches and pains of his healing body didn't seem so bad. Carl stirred in his sleep, making a quiet murmuring sound and Van Helsing leaned down and placed a small kiss on the top of Carl's head. This earned another murmur but didn't waken the other man. Van Helsing shook his head fondly and continued to watch Carl.
Last night had been a complete surprise. For all that he had lusted after Carl, he never expected Carl to return that desire. He had been prepared to work off his pent up frustration on some willing but disposable stranger. Carl's out of the blue question has set into motion things that could not be stopped. And now that he knew what it was like, there was no going back. Being with Carl had been more intense then any other person he had been with. Just watching Carl sleep was turning him on and he was tempted to wake the man so that he could take him again. The memory of being buried deep in Carl and the way Carl had responded was making him hard and achy all over again. He wanted Carl in a way he had never wanted anyone before.
That last thought made Van Helsing very uncomfortable. Last night had been absolutely amazing but it had been about sex. Mind-blowing sex yes but no more then that. At least, Carl hadn't indicated it was more then that. What if all it had been for Carl was a chance to blow off tension? Carl had never been in the field before, maybe he slept with Van Helsing because he needed to work off the adrenaline? Maybe he'd wake up and be embarrassed that he had tumbled into bed with a scruffy hunter.
Van Helsing stirred uncomfortably and pulled away slightly from Carl's sleeping form. Had last night meant anything to Carl? Van Helsing thought back over how it all happened and at no time did Carl ever give him any indication that it had been about anything more then mutual desire.
A sick, sinking feeling filled Van Helsing. While last night may have meant nothing to Carl, it had meant something to him. Despite his best defenses, he had developed an attachment to Carl. And now that he had slept with him, it was going to be harder then ever to protect himself. Even now, he wanted to just curl up with the man and try to forget all this. To pretend that Carl wanted him despite his lack of "pedigree" and crazy job. Suddenly restless, he sat up in bed and the abrupt move was enough to finally wake Carl.
Unaware of the turmoil happening next to him, Carl rolled over sleepily and smiled up at Van Helsing. "Hey, you aren't getting up, are you?" He snuggled up and put his head on Van Helsing's thigh.
Desire spiked hard and fast through Van Helsing and it was all he could do not to moan. Carl's head was in a far too suggestible position for Van Helsing's peace of mind. Deciding that the safest thing was to get far away from the very tempting sight of warm and rumpled Carl, he shifted slightly and said "Yeah, I've got some stuff I need to do to close out this mission. " He slide out from under Carl and quickly grabbed his jeans. Pulling them on he finally turned and looked at Carl. That was a big mistake as the disappointed and pouting expression was almost enough to make him forget his resolve and crawl back into bed. It took a great act of will just to stand there.
Carl sighed and said, "Oh, well, I guess you have to get going then." He burrowed back under the blankets trying to hide his disappointment. Then before he could stop himself he said "Maybe we could grab dinner tonight?" Seeing Van Helsing's rather stiff posture, he inwardly cringed. Clearly the man was trying to get away. In an effort to save some dignity for himself he said "Just a post-mission wrap-up kind of thing. " With still no response from Van Helsing he finished up with "Its no big deal. I mean you do this all the time. You don't exactly need to do a wrap-up." Carl felt like a complete pathetic loser and decided that he would cover it up by pretending to go back to sleep. He rolled over and said, "Well, I'm going to sleep some more. Car's yours for whatever you need to do." And with that he pretended to be settling down to sleep.
Van Helsing was feeling wretched. He wanted to have dinner with Carl tonight. Hell, he really wanted to get back into bed and spend the day making love to him. But if he wanted to protect himself, he was going to need to take some time away to put up some defenses. Still, he couldn't stand the fact that he had clearly hurt Carl's feelings so he said "I should be back in time for dinner. I'll bring home some takeaway Chinese and we can talk about the mission then. Now I've really got to run." With that, he turned and fled the room.
Carl heard the door close and sighed deeply. He was incredibly hurt and disappointed that Van Helsing had left. He had rather thought that after last night that there was something there between them but clearly it had just been the Hunter letting off a little steam after the mission. He rolled over on his back and stared up at the ceiling. Last night had been incredible. There had been a closeness that had felt like more then just amazing sex. But judging by Van Helsing's behavior this morning, he had clearly misread things...
Carl grabbed a pillow and threw it against the wall in frustration. How could he have been so stupid? He had fallen into bed with Van Helsing and now he was stuck with an awkward situation that could very well cost him his partnership with Van Helsing. And as tempting as it was to let the man out of the agreement, the fact of the matter was the Hunter needed his help if he was going to do his job in something even remotely resembling safety. Because the thought of him risking life and limb alone was more then he could stand.
Carl sighed and rolled over on his side. He was going to have to figure out some way to convince Van Helsing that he could handle what happened between them without making a scene. The only problem is that Carl was not convinced that he could. It had been hard enough before to pretend that he wasn't affected by the dark haired man's presence. Now that they had slept together, it was far too easy to remember how it felt to kiss the man, to touch and taste him. Could he really convince Van Helsing that he wasn't hoping to repeat the event – with as many variations as possible?
Carl let out cry of frustration and flung himself onto his back. It was hopeless. He'd never convince Van Helsing. So what if you tell him you are interested in continuing? said a sneaky little voice in his head. What if you said you were interested in something nice and casual? A kind of bonus to the working partnership? No strings, no commitments…
Carl laid still and thought about that. Could that work? He sat up in bed and bit his lip. It was incredibly risky. Van Helsing could put the pieces together and then all hell would break lose. But what if he doesn't put the pieces together? What if he doesn't and you have him all to yourself? He won't even know you are working on him until he's well and truly hooked…
Carl shook his head to try and clear it of the insidious voice. It was crazy. It would never work. Van Helsing was far too smart to fall for such a trick. But if it works… Carl bit his lip. Van Helsing was not one to trust. He had been hurt far too many times for that. But he had grudgingly let Carl in as a friend, was it that much more to get him to let him in as a lover? Carl snorted, hell yes it was. But still… it was worth a shot. And if he failed, well, its not like he was happy with things as they were…